Notes:

We'll see a little into the mind of Paul Lahote, and then dive into Jacob Black's tortured soul.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

PAUL LAHOTE

Even back in human form, Jacob hadn't stopped pacing. Part of me, a pretty strong one too, wanted to punch his stupid, lovesick little face. But there was something small, a secret cavern of unopened... Something, and it made me want to pace too. I don't know why I cared; even if I didn't want her dead, she still wasn't anything to me. I chalked it up to wanting answers about the vampire situation, secretly hoping that she'd remember everything and Sam would have no choice but to find out what she knew. But it was rounding on nearly four hours since Jared had pulled that leech girl from whatever was left of her little red Chevy, and still no word. I hadn't gotten a good glimpse of her, but the shell of a human that came from the wreckage wasn't anything like Jacob showed through the pack link, that's for sure. It was sickening, the stench of burning flesh. Even Jared had a savage scar from the fire that had kissed his skin.

It smelled almost worse than the bloodsucker trail we'd picked up. But it seemed we were always a minute too late, two strides behind that filthy redhead leech. And somehow Isabella seemed to be in the center of it all. She'd played pet to the Cullens, and now this? No fucking way was that a mistake. Leave it to Jacob to fall for the one girl in town who was literally in love with their sworn natural enemies. But, despite the hassle this girl was, I really did feel bad for Jacob. The poor sap was quaking like a leaf in the wind, and he'd even turned down Emily's cooking. The impulsive phasing, at least, was something I could relate to.

"Jake, dude, sit down" I bellowed to him, my tone coming across as more frustrated than I'd hoped. Still, when I patted the floral fabric of the sofa he took a seat anyway. He relaxed slightly, focusing on drawing in huge huffs of calming air, only to blow them out loud and slow. The trembling of his bones began to soften until he was in full control again.

"She'll be fine," I offered, a small smirk dancing over my lips. "She survived months in a leech den, what's a little car accident."

"Thanks Paul," he murmured, brown eyes distant. I nodded. We sat in comfortable silence for a long stretch of time, indulging our own inward musings. While my mind played at 'what ifs' on what Bella could tell us about the vampires, I imagine Jacob was concerned with what she might be like coming out of the accident. But when Emily came around with a heaping plate of banana bread, I felt proud to see my pack brother wolfing down slices with matching enthusiasm.

"Food is a thousand times better when you're constantly starving," Embry chuckled from the corner table, where he and Jared were playing cards. Well, Jared was playing, and Embry was.. telling bad jokes and hemorrhaging money.

"And poker is a lot more fun when you're winning," Jared countered. He waggled his brows as he lay his hand down, baring a straight flush.

"Hmm, maybe I'll give it a shot then," he purred back. He layed out an impressive royal flush, swiping the smug grin off his brother's face. It was his usual trick; play dumb and then win big. Emily grinned proudly from her vantage point in the kitchen, where she'd quietly done the dishes and witnessed the whole thing play out.

"But you were so bad, how did you do that!" Jared shot up from the table in disbelief, searching for any leftover slices of banana bread. When he found none, he gave a playful pout. Em tossed a rag at his head, but set to work on fixing another snack.

Just then, Sam burst through the door of the cozy cottage, wind howling in from behind him. The rain licked a trail down from his hair to his knees before it was dried by his body heat. Jacob perked up, hope splitting his lips into a boyish grin. Sam only shook his head, earning a frustrated whimper.

"She's still in surgery," he informed gravely. "Bella has.. some pretty deep burns, and they won't be sure how bad the head wound is unless she wakes up." Jacob snarled fiercely, boring his eyes hotly into his Alpha's.

"WHEN," he exclaimed. "When she wakes up." Emily cast Sam a warning look, concern etched over her marred face. He nodded carefully.

"We hope so. But keep your distance until we know for sure what she all remembers."

A knife would hardly be enough to cut through the tension that steamed over the room. Jacob pushed back against the Alpha order, wishing so desperately to see her. Of course I'd never tell him, but I was always amazed by how firmly Jacob could hold his ground against Sam. His blood screamed of leadership, and every order he had to choose to follow. Or fight. If anyone could fight it, it'd be Jacob, and if there was anyone he'd fight an order for, it'd be for Bella. But in the end, he gave in, as he always did. That awed me even more.

"Come on Paul, you're on patrol." I heaved myself up and shed my Jean cutoffs before jogging obediently out into the night.

...

JACOB BLACK

Weeks passed, and Sam still had me on a tight leash. Aside from the occasional phone call to Charlie to check up on her progress, I didn't contact her. Physically, I couldn't. It was killing me to stay away from Bella, and my only saving grace was all the sparring Sam had us doing. He wanted us sharp and ready for our next chance at that redheaded bloodsucker. She hadn't been around since the accident, and we still had no idea what she was after, or if she was involved. Somehow Bella had fallen clumsily within the heart of it all, probably a result of the Cullen's influence over her. It seemed the Cullens were the root problem of a lot of things, and both Bella and I had gotten caught in the crossfire. God, I hated those lifeless abominations, and not simply because they had turned me into... This. They had also torn the light from Bella's eyes, her very will to live. For a long time she'd barely managed to just exist in a world without them. She couldn't laugh, or listen to music. She was left without the strength to hold herself together. She couldn't.. love me back. And Bella had to have known what they were. I didn't just envy Edward for how he held her heart, despite being no good for her; I wished she knew my deepest secret too. I ached for her to remember the story, to piece together what I had become. I needed her to accept me, and the wolf blood coursing through my veins. I had to make her guess until she figured it out, and once she did this whole one-sided silence between us would be over. If she could love a murdering, cold sack of death, surely she would be able to accept me.

Agony flooded fierce as a hurricane every day I'd been kept apart from her. Most days, I tried my best to hate her. My brothers were forced to go over list after list on why I should be furious; she never needed me how I needed her, she wanted that leech no matter how much he's destroyed her. Bella was a fool, I insisted. She's using you to fix the hollow shell of pain she'd become. But I didn't care. All I wanted was for her to be happy, to feel whole again, and I could provide it for her. If only she would let me love her, she'd never have to feel the way she felt after Cullen left. God, I'd never leave her. The pull I felt to her, she was it for me. I'd loved her for so long, felt so much that she had to be my imprint. All I needed to do was see her, and we'd have forever to figure it out.

Today she would be released from the hospital, and I'd be able to. That is, as soon as her dad gave the word. She must have slept the morning away in the comfort of her own bed, because it was late in the afternoon by the time the phone rang. Charlie's name lit up the screen like a beacon in a long, black night, calling the boats to shore, and I was at their door in minutes. Trembling fingers pushed into the doorbell, and my ears sought out the familiar sounds of her heartbeat. How many times had I felt it against my chest as she sought for warmth, or comfort? I'd know it anywhere, the nervous thumping behind her ribs. The thirty seconds it took for Charlie to heave himself off the couch and swing open the door was an eternity. Sweat pooled in my palms, a lump itching frantically at my throat. I cleared it nervously, praying to the spirits that my voice wouldn't crack.

"Hey Charlie," I squeaked, fiddling with the the inside of my back pockets.

"Jake." He motioned for me to step past him, shock swimming in the dark pool of his eyes. "You look.." Suspiciously and unaturally Huge. Impossibly bigger. Where's all your hair? "Different."

I shrugged nonchalantly. "Been working out lately." My gaze scanned over the room, searching. Charlie nodded towards the staircase, wondering if the haircut and the muscles were all part of some teenage rebellion.

"She's in her room, go on up." His face was sympathetic. "I'm sure she'll be happy to see you."

Trudging up the stairs, my legs became lead. As I forced them to carry me further, the heavier they grew, until I was nearly gasping under the effort. Outside her door I stood, face dragging against my palms and sucking in steadying breaths. This was the moment, I'd see her, and it would all shift. The moment Sam saw Emily and their immediate link that brought him to his knees had replayed through the pack mind every single day. It was Bella, it would always be Bella.

'Here goes,' I thought. I raised my fist and rapped it lightly against the door, shutting my eyes tight. A voice like lightning zapped straight into my gut, and I couldn't remember the last time I'd heard anything so beautiful. Her voice.

"Come in!"

The handle turned under thick fingers, my fingers. Time became a concept without meaning, seconds became eons. There was blood pounding behind my ears, every nerve ending on alert to see what would happen next. The door swung open, and she was finally right in front of me. Months of waiting, leading up to this moment. I cracked open one eye, then the other, agonizingly slow, to stare into the carpet. She was in her bed, I knew, but I wasn't ready. She cleared her throat, her voice dry.

"..Jake?"

I dragged my gaze up to hers, and she stared back, and immediately I knew. My knees crashed to the floor, my limp form barely holding itself up. I knew..

Notes:

Any prompts or predictions? Drop them in the review!

Which of the wolves are you betting on?