Word: Baneberry
Word Count: 1040
Characters: Hitsugaya, Hinamori
Pairings:None
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: All rights for Bleach go to its proper owner(s).
Baneberry: Any of several plants having clusters of white flowers and poisonous red, white, or blackish berries.
For someone who cared little about aesthetics in general, flowers seemed to have a presence in his life whenever something major happened.
The first time they appeared was when he met Momo. It was winter then, and he could remember, as he laid still in the soft snow that was becoming progressively less cold, wondering how it was that such a fragile thing could survive in the harsh season of bitter frosts. He remembered stretching out a hand to brush against the stalks that swayed slightly in the gentle wind, deadly and aloof as the snow that gathered up around it. He remembered thinking that it truly was strong, despite its appearance.
And then there were hands on his shoulders, turning him onto his back. A soft voice spoke above him, filled with genuine worry. "Hey, are you all right?"
The next time he saw the plant, he was seeking a quiet place to take a few minutes to compose himself after running from the loud woman with the dangerous chest. This time it was growing on the banks of a river, its long stalks drooping just inches above the running water. It was the beginning of summer, and its berries were just starting to shrivel. He dipped his hand into the water and let it drip onto the plant.
Later, when he knocked on the door to his grandmother's house, wearing the black and white Shinigami uniform and a neutral expression doing nothing to contain his excited smile, the plant was eking out a life in the dry dust by the path.
Years passed without him seeing them, and in truth he didn't think much of it. Momo was the one to urge him to stop and 'smell the roses' (an expression she'd picked up in the Living World somehow and was quite taken with), and he really wasn't overly concerned with flowers. So, when he literally fell out of the sky the first time after achieving Bankai, his last action before drifting into the waiting darkness was to notice the plant's presence with a bemused, "Huh."
It was only when Matsumoto plunked a potted plant on his desk, saying it was an anniversary gift for surviving his first year as Captain, when he took a closer look at the plant. White flowers on a white stalk, berries of white, black, and red which also happened to be extremely poisonous, and roots which were suitable as painkillers.
His response was to ask why she was giving him a plant with poisonous berries. He realized that he wasn't the most social Captain to ever exist, but was his presence so intolerable that she had to go to such lengths as accidental food poisoning to knock him off?
(Needless to say, that was the last time Matsumoto ever gave him a plant as a present.)
And now, lying on the ruined heap of a building in the fake Karakura Town, left arm severed and the resulting wound bleeding heavily, he fixed his hazy gaze on the flowers sticking up through the rubble.
They really are sturdy, he thought lazily, and shifted his heavy body enough that his right hand could touch it. Pain flashed through him, stars exploding behind his eyes and making him grit his teeth, letting out a low groan. The plant was just out of reach, and for some reason he felt that he needed to get to it, needed the feel of something soft in his hands for one last time. He shifted again, and Soi Fon, who was lying nearby, watched his efforts without any real interest.
His vision blacked out before he could reach them, and when he regained consciousness again Inoue was kneeling beside him, her glowing dome stretched over his form, and with a shock he realized he had a left arm.
It was only a couple weeks later, when Soi Fon wandered into his office, looking exactly how he felt when something was placed just out of reach, that he thought about it again. She asked why he had been trying to get to the flowers. He merely blinked at her, his memory of those few minutes very hazy, and she left without an answer.
He realized the answer to her question a few days after. Unohana sent a Hell Butterfly to tell him that Momo was awake. He went to her immediately, of course, and was relieved when she turned clouded brown eyes in his direction and said, "Shiro…"
If it wouldn't have compromised his reputation of being a cold, emotionless prick with a stick up his behind, he would have fallen to his knees right then and there in the Fourth Division hospital room and wept until he ran out of tears. It was enough to know that she didn't blame him, that she didn't hate him anymore.
As it was, he only grimaced a little and half-heartedly said, "Don't call me that, Bed-Wetter Momo."
Her eyes closed briefly, and when they opened again a new light shone in them. "Thank you," she whispered, and although he wasn't sure what she was thanking him for, he just nodded.
Deciding to take the night off, he went out of the Seireitei and just wandered around a forest. He eventually found a lake and sat by it to watch the sun set. It was then that he saw the plants again. This time they had white berries growing on them. And there was his answer.
The berries were always present, always there at the next step, at the next level. They were a way out, his ticket to end it all whenever it all just got too much. But he had resisted. He had kept going, no matter what happened.
The next time he saw Soi Fon happened to be after a Captain's meeting discussing who to promote. The young Kuchiki's name was put in and heavily considered for a Lieutenant's position, despite Captain Kuchiki's blatant scowl. Hitsugaya went up to Soi Fon outside the meeting hall before she could shunpo away.
"It was baneberry," he said, and left. She was undoubtedly confused, but she was a spy, and spies know how to get information. He had no doubt she would understand.