Day 7
Morticia
Ridiculous.
Doctor
It's not ridiculous, Mrs Addams! GBS is indiscriminate - there's no real known cause. He was chronically ill as a child, correct?
Morticia
Yes he was, the poor dear.
Doctor
And he already has a transplanted heart?
Grandmama
Yes - of a 20-year old track star, I personally saw to it that/
Morticia
/But, in all the years I've known him, doctor, nothing as serious as this has ever arisen. A fair few bouts of flu, migraines, sinus flare-ups, seizures borne of brushing against my wolfsbane plant, a few concussions, several more serious head injuries and resulting bouts of amnesia... I could go on. But I simply cannot accept what you're trying to tell me.
Fester
She healed him with her love when they first met!
The doctor looks stony-faced.
Doctor
There are some things, Mrs Addams, that are out of our hands and in the hands of the fates.
Morticia
But they've usually been so kind to him!
Doctor
And they've been kind to him again, Mrs Addams, because as long as we take care of him, he's going to live.
Morticia briefly puts her head in her hands before regaining composure as quickly as she can.
Morticia
Thank you, doctor, of course, but - what are we going to tell the children?
Doctor
That their father's life is saved!
Fester (whispering loudly to Grandmama)
I think she means "how are we gonna tell them he's a vegetable?"
Grandmama (loudly whispering back)
Simple, just like that.
Doctor
No, no, no. Sir - no, Mr. Addams is most certainly not a vegetable - if the results of the spinal tap were accurate - and I have no reason to believe they're not, then you have no cause to fear that Mr Addams is a "vegetable" or anything even close to mentally impaired.
Morticia
Oh, my poor, sweet, kind Gomez - he would have so enjoyed that spinal tap if he were well…
Murmurs of agreement.
Fester
I'm still a little jealous.
Grandmama
Hush, Fester, I can give you one at home.
Doctor
And now we're confident that he's stable, you can bring your children in to see him any time, Mrs Addams.
Morticia
Oh, but how could I let them see their father like this?
Grandmama
Well, you'll have to show them sometime, because if Dr B is right, he'll be like this for the long haul.
Morticia
Tell me that isn't true, doctor.
Doctor
Well, Mrs Addams, I'm afraid the recovery process from GBS is as unpredictable as they come. I can't guarantee you anything definite.
Fester
So it could be quick?
Doctor
Or not at all.
Morticia
He could be stuck like this?
Doctor
Like I said, I can't guarantee a thing, Mrs Addams. Right now, he is stable - yesterday's surgeries were all successful.
Grandmama (musing, mainly to herself)
Uncle Imar always said just pull the plug if he ever ended up a vegetable.
Doctor
He is not a vegetable, ma'am - if he were vegetative, minimally conscious or comatose, we could give you the option to remove life support, but since we know he's not, we can't let you make a decision for him that he can make himself.
Fester
But how're we ever gonna know if his mind's made up?
Morticia
We don't, Fester.
Doctor
We can wait and see if he regains any movement - as soon as we can establish a communication system, we can ask him then.
Morticia
And if he ... if he doesn't?
Doctor
Then we just do our jobs - "first, do no harm" - we keep him alive until he can express that it's against his wishes. Did the two of you ever discuss what you would do in this situation?
Morticia
Ah yes, a favourite topic of ours - of course, it's easier to speak about such things when they're not staring you in the face.
Doctor
And what did he say?
Morticia
In the case of locked-in syndrome, be it incomplete LiS or classic LiS - to ask him ourselves and see what he feels then. If total LiS, as it seems it is in this case, to err
on the side of caution and assume he'd prefer to live. He couldn't stand to leave me, or the children. They are so dear to him - to us. I know he couldn't bear not to see them grow up, even if it meant living with total.
Grandmama
Sensible. Most unlike him.
Doctor
So that settles it, for now, with total, he lives. If he regains anything, we ask him ourselves.
Morticia
I suppose so.
Doctor
Do you want me to call for the children?
Morticia
Do, doctor. I imagine Lurch must need a break from entertaining them.
Doctor
Very well.
Morticia
May I see him in the meantime?
Doctor
Of course, Mrs Addams.
Morticia is escorted by the doctor to a private hospital room. There is already a nurse inside, sitting at Gomez's bedside. His eyes are open and she's administering eyedrops every couple of seconds, but his eyeballs appear frozen completely in place, unable to move - in fact, he appears completely unable to move anything, his entire body is limp as a ragdoll's. He has a slack-jawed, open mouth, with what looks like the beginnings of drool about to start dripping. There's a newly-inserted tracheotomy present - the surgery was yesterday, along with a g-tube & cath put in place, all with the intent to preserve his life. Overcome, Morticia makes her way to her husband and falls into the chair on the other side of the bed. The nurse continues administering eyedrops, but Morticia looks up at her after staring into her husband's face for a few moments.
Morticia
May I?
Nurse
You want to?
Morticia
Of course.
The nurse hands Morticia the eyedropper, and she begins every few seconds to place a drop or two into Gomez's eyes.
Morticia
Mon cher…
Nothing.
Morticia
My poor, incapacitated love.
She takes his hand before pulling it away.
Morticia
No, I won't - they told me it could hurt you. And not in a pleasant way, at that.
She drops more eyedrops in and puts her face right in his line of sight.
Morticia
I am here, my darling.
She strokes his cheek before pulling her hand away again, having immediately forgotten what she'd just said.
Morticia
I'm sorry, my dear. They said touch could be painful. But, for the sake of dignity...
Morticia takes a tissue from the bedside table and wipes away the drool.
Morticia
There, my sweet. You are a lion.
She administers the eyedrops again.
As she does so, the kids come in, led by Lurch, the doctor behind them.
Morticia
Oh, Lurch, thank you.
Wednesday and Pugsley stand in the doorway, looking stunned to see the state their father is in.
Wednesday
Father?
Pugsley
They said you were gonna be okay.
Doctor
I said he wasn't going to die, son.
Wednesday
There's a difference, you know.
Pugsley
But he looks… dead.
Morticia
Oh yes, Pugsley, do compliment him, he'll need all the words of encouragement he can get.
Morticia opens her arms and lifts Wednesday up into them. She hands the eyedropper to Lurch.
Morticia
Lurch, every twenty-five seconds, one or two drops in each eye. Don't touch him, it could be painful.
Lurch
Yes, Mrs Addams.
Wednesday
Can he hear?
Morticia
Yes, angel.
Wednesday (with some authority – almost as if fearing Gomez has forgotten who she is)
Hello father, it's Wednesday, your daughter speaking.
Morticia
I'm sure he's delighted to know you're here.
Pugsley
I'm here too, father.
Doctor
How about telling your father something nice, Pugsley? Something to lift his spirits.
Pugsley
Alright, I suppose. Father? I'm… gonna buy a new train with my allowance…
Doctor Benson smiles encouragingly, and gestures with his hand as if to say "go on…"
Pugsley
…and wait 'til you get home so we can blow it up together!
Doctor Benson's gaze darts apprehensively at Morticia, who seems to pay no attention to the very bad job he did of hiding his confusion. Instead, she nods at Pugsley, unfettered.
Morticia
Oh, darling, I know he's thrilled to hear that.
Pugsley absentmindedly plays with the blankets on the bed as his gaze shifts between his mother, his father, and the doctor.
Pugsley
So, when is he coming home?
Doctor
Not for a very long while, I'm afraid.
Morticia shoots a look at the doctor.
Morticia
How long?
Doctor
Could be months. 4? 5? Maybe even 6 months. And if we don't see any signs of recovery, much, much longer.
Morticia (suddenly snappier)
Well, that's preposterous, doctor. I will pay for him to be let home immediately.
Doctor
Pay for...? No, Mrs Addams, that isn't how this works.
Morticia
I will not have my husband, Grandmama's son, Fester's nephew, and our children's father - languishing alone for most of the day in a faraway hospital.
Doctor
But Mrs Addams, just because he's stable doesn't mean he can just immediately come home. Just look at him, he is, right now, the most helpless a human can be. He will need 24/7 care and a dedicated team of doctors and nurses to assist him with literally everything.
Morticia
Of course – and I will pay for each and every one of them.
Doctor
To do what?
Morticia
To come home with us. We have a multitude of guest rooms.
Pugsley
One even has bunks!
Doctor
You want us to -
Morticia
Naturally. It's what's best for everyone - Gomez simply must be at home if he's to even have the slightest chance of recovery. Our home is our castle - our last
outpost against the ravages of the world. Our little slice of paradise. Gomez will recover best in a safe, familiar place surrounded by his family.
Doctor
But/
Morticia
/What more can I say to convince you?
Doctor
I just can't allow you to bring him home when he's still this fragile, this vulnerable s/
Morticia
/And he will only become more vulnerable should he be tended to by strangers for the majority of the day - my husband needs his home, and he needs me.
Doctor
Mrs Addams…
Morticia
We have the money. I will pay for it with every penny I have.
Doctor
This is unprecedented.
Morticia
Why do people always say that about my perfectly reasonable demands? How could you keep this man from his children? They are our world. He's said that he's lost without them and I couldn't agree with that sentiment more.
Doctor
I just... I mean - if you have the money to convert your house to suit his care, then…
Morticia
Pocket change, doctor. Gomez has paid more for rocks.
Doctor
Well, then, I suppose that/
Morticia
/"First, do no harm?" I remind you, doctor, that keeping him in this horrid place can only do him harm.
Wednesday (her childish innocence being the straw that broke the camel's back)
Please?
Doctor
... let us… monitor him… for one more week. If, in a week's time, we deem him stable enough to return home - and you pay for all the necessary equipment immediately - we will see about an early discharge.
Morticia
Oh, thank you, doctor. We are so grateful. Children, thank Dr Benson for being so kind!
Wednesday / Pugsley
Thank you, Dr Benson!
Doctor
Now - it's just gone nine. Visiting hours are over for today, and we must allow Mr Addams to get some rest.
Pugsley
He's in bed, isn't he rested enough already?
Doctor
Hurry along now.
Wednesday
How's he gonna fall asleep if he can't close his eyes?
Pugsley (whispering to Wednesday)
Drugs.
Wednesday
Ah.
Morticia wipes her eyes with another tissue before almost immediately composing herself.
Morticia
Very well - I will comply, safe in the knowledge that mon cher will soon be home, and out of this place. Come, Lurch.
She leads them all out of the room but stops at the door, and looks back at Gomez.
Morticia
Tomorrow, bubele - at the first moment I am allowed back. If I could stay with you, I would. My poor, kind, noble darling. Rest well.
They leave the room and walk down the hallway of the hospital. Morticia holds Wednesday and Pugsley's hands. Fester and Grandmama meet them at the end of the corridor, just off the waiting room.
Fester
How was he?
Pugsley
He seemed better last time…
Pugsley looks around, as if trying to make sure none of the doctors are in earshot.
Pugsley
Was he really dying yesterday?
Morticia sighs.
Morticia
Yes, darling, he was.
Pugsley
So why isn't he dying today?
Fester
What, are ya disappointed?
Morticia
Your father couldn't breathe properly yesterday, Pugsley dear. They did an operation yesterday evening after you went home with Lurch and your sister. It saved his
life.
Pugsley
But he could talk to us yesterday, he said our names when he saw us come in.
Morticia
Well, that's just typical of your father – over-exerting himself. He shouldn't have tried to say anything.
Wednesday
He tried to say other things too…
Grandmama
But none of us could understand him.
Pugsley
Why didn't he say anything to us today if he could hear us?
Morticia
Well, my dears, a few things happened after you left. One was that the operation to help your father breathe worked. It went perfectly – but, there is one thing about that particular operation. No one who gets it will be able to talk afterwards.
Grandmama
At least, not for a long while. He's been trached before - for six weeks, in fact - after Cousin Slime put a pinch too much botox in his tea.
Wednesday
Not able to speak?
Morticia
I'm afraid not.
Pugsley and Wednesday both react.
Wednesday
Will he have to learn sign language?
Pugsley (to Wednesday – a rather subdued air of "duh" in his tone - sad that he needs to remind her of this)
No, because he can't move his arms or hands.
Wednesday
Oh.
Pugsley (being a resigned little know-it-all)
He can't move anything anymore. That's what I heard Dr Benson say.
Morticia
And the other thing, children - is that your poor father's face must have become paralyzed overnight. Remember how he couldn't close his eyes or his mouth?
Wednesday
Yeah.
Morticia
If he could have closed them, he would have, my darlings.
Fester
Just like being buried alive - except not fun.
They reach the exit to the hospital. Lurch leaves to fetch the car. Morticia gives him a sad smile.
Morticia
Thank you, Lurch.
Fester
So how long's the old boy in for?
Morticia
I asked - they told me it could be months - perhaps even indefinitely.
Fester and Grandmama gawk.
Fester
What?! Well, I hope you took a stand against them.
Grandmama
You can't let my boy stay in that tiny little room! He belongs at home.
Fester
With Nurse Fester to watch over his little sleeping soul.
Grandmama
And his mother!
Morticia
Oh, of course I fought. I will buy him out of there within the week if it comes to it. The doctors want to watch for more changes before they discharge him. They've given me a week to pay for the necessary renovations, and we can begin the process of bringing him home. Children, wouldn't you prefer to have your father be at home with us rather than out here?
Wednesday / Pugsley
Yes, mother.
Lurch pulls up in the car.
Lurch
Ready, Mrs. Addams.
Morticia
Thank you, Lurch. Come in, children. Let's go home for the night.