The beat could be heard throughout the entire neighborhood. Cars lined the streets for blocks. The muggy evening sun shone down on the partying teenagers. There was a party at the Starr household and everyone knew. Almost the entirety of Mushroom High was in attendance. Even neighboring schools seemed to know and we're attending. Sega Composite, Hyrule High, even students from Pokemon Regional had ventured to the party. It was said that Rosalina's parties were out of this world.
The majority of the party guests were outside; either in the pool, or dancing on the lawn, or mingling around trying to find more alcohol. Nobody cared who they were dancing with or who they were talking to. Everyone was in high spirits just having a good time, knowing that soon they would be put through the hell that is finals. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was the hot June sun, but nobody seemed to care. They were just enjoying themselves.
In the backyard, in the in-ground pool that Rosalina was oh so proud of, there was a game of Chicken going on. Most who were in the pool had decided against playing and were just watching, but there were four who were adamant on just having to play. Zelda- who was by far the most intoxicated person in the pool, had suggested they play and it grabbed the attention of Mona, Pit, and Daisy.
Daisy turned to Pit and said, "it's you and me."
If Pit was being honest with himself, Daisy intimidated him. She was this pretty cheerleader who didn't take crap from anyone, and he was just a skinny kid who was on the yearbook committee. He felt himself blush just by looking at her.
"I-I don't think I can lift you," he felt embarrassed. He didn't want to admit it but she would have found out anyways.
Daisy laughed pompously. "Hah! As if. You're getting on my shoulders."
She noticed the freshman's uncertainty so she quickly continued, "listen, Zelda is pretty drunk. All you have to do is push her over and we'll win."
That small speech motivated Pit, "okay, I'll do it."
So the two partners squared off. Daisy and Pit vs. Mona and Zelda. Mona was the first to make a move. She stepped forward, and just as Daisy hypothesized, Zelda swayed, without Pit even having to touch her. Pit gained confidence, this was going to be easy!
Daisy moved forward so Pit could attack. It didn't take much for him to take down Zelda. A small push to the shoulders and she was sent down. Sent down right on top of Yoshi who was lounging on a pool-floaty nearby. They were both pushed under the water. In a frenzy of tangled limbs and inhaled water they soon surfaced. Gasping for air.
"Man! I just dyed my hair too," Yoshi complained, ringing out his hair causing the water adjacent to his person to turn slightly green.
Zelda continued to hack up the water she had ingested. She kept coughing until a few people became concerned and came to see if she was well. "Oh boy," she said warily, "I don't feel so good."
That's when she threw up. Right into the pool. People scattered. They were screaming and yelling. Nobody wanted to be in barf water. The commotion caught the attention of the nearby Rosalina. She turned to go investigate, but her curiosity was soon cured. She was met with a lone Zelda, who was still throwing up into her pool.
Rosalina was dumbfounded. How was she even supposed to deal with this? She hadn't even gone swimming yet and now she wasn't going to be able to. "Zelda? The fuck?" Rosalina managed. She wasn't even sure how to react. Could she even get mad? There was a girl throwing up in her pool yet she felt no discernible emotion. The crowd that was forming around the pool was becoming larger. Most were heckling Zelda, calling out lewd names. Rosalina thought about how much Zelda was going to regret this on Monday, when everyone had seen the ten second videos of her shame.
"God-dammit!" Rosalina finally came to her senses, "Link! Somebody find Link to come deal with his girlfriend."
Rosalina began directing orders to people around her. Forcing somebody to help Zelda out of the pool. Foreboding anymore people from entering the pool. Sending Yoshi to the pool house to get a pool skimmer. She grumbled and hissed and uttered a string of curse words, that if put into this fic, would make the rating go up.
A hour or so later, after Zelda and Link were sent on their way, the party was back in full swing. Someone had ordered a food truck and kids were queueing up down the block. Everybody was slowly becoming more intoxicated as the sun settled behind the horizon. Rosalina was subconsciously thankful somebody had ordered the food truck. Maybe it would sober some of the more drunk people, herself included.
One of the line goers, who was not drunk but had a nice buzz going, was Pauline. She was angrily texting away, her acrylic nails going tappity-tap-tap against the screen.
"You know Pauline, I saw this really cute guy from Sega," Pauline's friend Eclair said.
"Ew, all guys from Sega are sleazeballs," Pauline's other friend, Dixie Kong, said, thinking outloud.
"Well he's been eyeing up Pauline all night,"
"Really? Tell me, who?"
Soon the two became more invested in the conversation about Pauline than Pauline even was. The two weren't the brightest. Some would say they were 12 short of a dozen. Pauline was barely registering what the two were gabbing about. Her heart was still inconsolable about her (not so recent) breakup with her boyfriend Mario. He had dumped her, saying "it's not you, it's me." Within a few days Mario was already together with Peach. He barely had a mourning period! Peach was just a rebound fling that seemed to stick around.
"Pauline? Pauline are you even listening to us?" Dixie broke Pauline out of her trance.
"What are you two going on about?"
"Shadow. He's been watching you. How about you go on a date with him?" Eclair asked.
"Just like DK has been eyeing her up in gym class too!" Dixie squealed. And soon the girls were on another tirade about who was eyeing who and so forth.
All Pauline did was roll her eyes. In her mind she was formulating a plan to get Mario back. Tonight was the night she was going to pounce on him and make him hers once again.
In the back yard, the man who was the center of Pauline's thoughts, Mario, was lounging around the campfire. He was full of pasta and was trying to enjoy the warmth of the fire. Trying. He was actually enjoying his solitude until an infamous blue haired boy pulled up a stump beside him. Talking a mile a minute it took Mario a second to realize the boy was actually talking to him.
"You're on MK's track team right?"
Mario puffed his chest out a little bit. He liked being recognized. "Yeah, I am."
"Thought I recognized you," he laughed, "you're the one who almost beat me in the 100 meter this spring. I still won though. Too bad you're too slow. Ha!"
"It's Sonic right?" Mario asked this to be polite. He knew who Sonic was. Hell- everybody knew who Sonic was. He was the scrawny freshman kid who broke all previous track records. Quickly being appointed Sega's track team captain, and collectively pissing every track team member off simultaneously, he took the district by storm.
"That's my name. Don't wear it out!" Sonic laughed loudly, again, taking another sip from a red cup that smelled strongly of whiskey. Mario felt concerned. He wasn't sure that some kid who weighed maybe a hundred and ten pounds should be drinking that.
"So," Mario asked, "is this your first party?"
"Are you being serious? I get invited to parties all the time. All the time. Like- don't make me laugh."
Mario chuckled a little, letting a silence fall over them.
"Sonic," a whiny voice said, interrupting their quiet time, "Amy is looking for you."
Standing at the edge of the fire a freckled face boy- who looked like he wasn't even all the way through puberty yet, stood. Clutching a red cup with all his might he looked about ready to cry.
"Oh shit!" Sonic suddenly stood up, "you didn't tell her where I am, did you, Tails?"
"No, but she's been asking around."
"Well," Sonic said, turning to face Mario. "Gotta blast. My girlfriend is batshit crazy, bro."
Sonic started into a full on sprint into the sea of people- going God knows where, leaving Mario and Tails alone.
Mario eyed Tails suspiciously. Sonic had probably dragged Tails here, promising to not leave his side all night, but ultimately ditched him the moment they got dropped off, leaving Tails to stand around awkwardly all night until Sonic's mom came to pick them up.
"So. . ." Tails began. He opened his mouth to say something but no words would come out.
Mario stood up. Brushing Tails's lame excuse at conversation off as nerves, he said, "listen kid, if you go into the basement there's a Shroom Box set up. I'm pretty sure Bowser's kid brother, Iggy, will be down there. Go knock yourself out."
With that Mario left Tails, heading in the general direction he heard his girlfriends laugh emanating from.
Rosalina watched her friend grow more extroverted with each drink she had. Her laugh grew louder, and her jokes more vulgar. Rosalina knew Peach wasn't drunk- she had counted about four coolers pass through her hands, but knew she was feeling fine. Rosalina knew not to worry, Peach could handle herself, she had turned down every drunken compliment thrown in her general direction. And she knew that when Peach and Mario left the conversation incognito that they were probably going to have sex in the woods behind her house. It wasn't Peach she was worried about, though. It was everybody else. Rosalina knew that rumors spread like wildfire, and with a minimum of three hundred people here there was going to be more than enough. She could only hope that the new couple found some privacy- and made smart choices.
"Rosalina! My buddy, how's it going?" Bowser asked, throwing an arm around Rosalina's shoulder.
"I feel like I'm babysitting more than I'm enjoying the party," she confided. She had barely finished her drink.
"Lame. Lame. . . This is a kick ass party though," he gestured his free arm to their surroundings.
"Thanks. I'm surprised anyone from Sega showed up. They usually have their heads stuck too far up their assses to make an appearance."
They both laughed loudly at their school rivalry.
"Ya'know," Bowser said as nonchalantly as possible, "there's some people on your roof. Don't mean to alarm you. Just thought you should know."
"Really? Fuck, the last thing I need to be doing is calling an ambulance."
Without saying goodbye Rosalina left to go yell at the roof crusaders. She didn't need anything legal to happen all because some drunk idiot fell off of her roof. Her dad would kill her.
Inside the house seemed to have as many people as the outside did. As the night wore on it seemed more and more people had showed up. The music was jumpin' and it made for a difficult time navigating; Rosalina thought she would never make it through the sea of inappropriate booty on crotch grinding, or steamy make out sessions. Finally making her way upstairs, she knew the only way to get onto the roof was through her bedroom window and by the time she got to her bedroom she was furious. She was screeching before she was even halfway through the window.
"Hey you assholes. What the hell do you think you're doing on my roof? One of you idiots is going to get. . ."
Rosalina stopped. Surprised by what she saw. Instead of drunk teens, she saw Yoshi, Mimi, L, Samus, and Luigi all laying down. Staring up at the stars?
"What are you guys doing up here?" She asked dumbfounded.
L was the first to sit up. "Oh my God. Rosalina, you should come check out these stars, man. They're like, super bright tonight."
"Are you guys stoned?"
"Well no shit, Sherlock," Yoshi said, causing the group to burst into laughter.
The smell should have been her first clue, but Rosalina had hoped it was just coming from downstairs.
"You know I can feel the stars right now," L said, and again the group cracked up.
"Oh my God, L, how much weed have you smoked?" Rosalina asked, concerned with her friend's well being. "What the hell Mimi?"
Mimi sat up, too stoned to look hurt. "Relax, at least I let him smoke my good stuff." She tipped her head at the joint Luigi had.
"Your good stuff? He's like fourteen, he shouldn't have gotten any of your stuff!"
"Rosalina," L interjected, "I totally asked to try."
Rosalina turned her attention to the boy. She cared so deeply for him that she couldn't bear to see him throw his life away. "You don't get a say."
"Jeez Mom. Whatever, I'm going downstairs," L pouted, struggling to make his way off the roof.
"Mimi, help him," Rosalina commanded, "take him downstairs and make him some snacks."
L's eyes lit up and he started on some rant about how he wanted ketchup chips with peanut butter. Mimi glared at Rosalina, but complied.
"Fine," she whined, "but I'm taking my weed with me."
"I think the fuck not," Luigi interjected, holding the joint tightly to his chest.
Mimi grunted and flipped them off as she helped L back inside. Leaving the group alone.
Rosalina sighed heavily, letting herself fall beside Yoshi. "Lord almighty what have I done?"
"Dude, chill," Samus said, "just chill, and lie down with us and chill."
"Samus. You're baked."
"Heh, I know," she said. And then Samus- the six foot tall- one hundred and sixty pound- all muscle- only female quarterback in the district, burst into a fit of uncontrollable giggles.
Yoshi rolled onto his side so he could face Rosalina. "You know what would make you feel better right now?"
"What?" Rosalina asked, hoping he would instill some of his wisdom he only seemed to have when he was high.
"If you smoked this weed right here." He grinned cheekily, showing her the joint Luigi had passed him.
All Rosalina could do was roll her eyes and take his offer.
Pauline had been watching the group on the roof for some time. She wondered if Peach was with them and had considered going up to find out, but decided against it. She wasn't quite sure what she was going to do- not being able to solidify a plan that didn't involve anything short of murder, all she was certain of was that she was going to face this head on. She was going to confront Peach and call her out in front of everybody here, hopefully humiliating her in the process. But she had already failed at finding Peach. If she couldn't find Peach she couldn't humiliate her and then she couldn't get Mario back. Her life was falling apart in front of her eyes.
"Hey," a deep voice said, "how's it going?"
Pauline turned to the voice. A tall, dark haired boy stood before her. He had a red streak through his hair that made him look like a rooster.
Was this who Eclair and Dixie had been talking about? What was his name? Sidic? Sonic? Shadow!
"Hey there," she said, using her smile she reserved specifically for horny boys, "I'm doing like so good right now."
"Really?" Shadow cocked his left eyebrow, taking a step towards her.
"Really." Pauline smiled. Then she kissed Shadow. Letting his tongue slip into her mouth, she knew she could work this angle. She already had Shadow wrapped around her finger.
Pulling away, Pauline flipped her hair over her shoulder as if nothing had happened. "Have you seen my best friend? I've been looking all over for her."
Shadow look stupefied. "What?"
"My best friend," Pauline lied, "she's blonde, about this tall, kinda looks like she uses her tits more than her brain."
"Uhh," Shadow was still taken back from their kiss, "I think I might have saw her at the tiki bar doing jello shots?"
Pauline laughed haughtily, before walking away. "Thanks Sonic."
Mario watched in awe as Peach and Ash Ketchum readied themselves to battle it out. In a drunken stupor Ash had challenged anybody to a shot contest, and Peach was the first to accept. So they lined up six shots of tequila one after the other. Whoever was the first to finish was the winner. They hadn't decided on a prize yet, but the sheer glory of winning alone should have been enough. Mario was unsure Peach should be drinking that much; but with a bottle of beer as chaser she was ready. Taking a swig of beer after each shot, Peach beat Ash by a mile and a half. She turned to the crowd and took a bow before running giddily to her boyfriend.
"Holy, Peach," Mario exclaimed, "how did you do that?" She should have been drunk off her rocker.
Grinning, she leaned in and whispered, "I cheated my ass off. Spit the tequila into the bottle each time."
Mario couldn't help but laugh. He couldn't believe his sweet and innocent Peach had just admitted to cheating. She couldn't cheat at a game of cards if she willed herself, and here she was, swindleing a contest in her favour. He leaned forward and kissed her congratulations, feeling as if nothing could ruin the moment.
Boy was he wrong.
"Hey Peach," a voice yelled, "I've got a few choice words for you!"
The couple turned to face the voice. It was Pauline. Hands on her hips, she looked ready to pick a fight.
"Pauline? What's the deal?" Mario asked.
This simple remark infuriated Pauline. How could Mario treat her this way? It seemed like only last week he was kissing her and calling her Baby.
"You want to know what the deal is Mario?" She asked, deadly serious, "the deal is that you dumped me and then like the very next day you take this- this slut out on a date!"
"Whoa," Mario threw his hands up in defense, "there's no need to call names."
This small confrontation had caused the crowd of teens around them to quiet. They wanted to know every single detail, so the very next day they could tell everyone they knew and throw it wildly out of proportion.
"The fuck did you just call me?" Peach asked, taking a step forward only to be blocked by Mario.
"Peach, you're drunk. Don't do this." Mario tried to calm her. But the adrenaline running through her veins wanted her to do it more.
Pushing through Mario's arm she said, "I'm not too drunk to throw these hands."
People cheered, then quieted again.
"Pauline, what is your problem with me?" Peach asked, lowering herself into a fighting stance.
"Oh man. You don't even want to get me started. My problem is that you can just waltz in here and think you can steal my man. You want to know how long we had been dating before you came along? We'd been dating since the eighth fucking grade!" Pauline seethed, jabbing an accusing finger in Peach's direction.
"I didn't steal Mario from you, Pauline. I guess he just didn't want you anymore when he realized there was better out there. Besides, he settled for more than just some one's sloppy seconds."
For a moment there was silence. Complete and utter silence. Until a certain blue haired boy yelled, "FIGHT!"
Pauline kicked off her black stilettos, "you've gone too far this time, bitch."
Rolling up her non-existent sleeves, Pauline readied herself for a good old fashioned wrestle. If Papa and Uncle Cooter had taught her anything, it was how to fight. She would be a disgrace to them if lost against someone, Peach no less.
The crowd was deafening. Intoxicated and excited; everybody was ready for a real fight after Yoshi's fight fell through that afternoon. Camera's filming, they were ready for a hair pulling, nail scratching, sissy slapping catfight.
Camera flashes illuminating them, the girls readied themselves.
Pauline knew she could win this. She hadn't spent all those years fighting with cousin Jayce for nothing.
Peach knew she could win this. If she could get Pauline on the ground she knew she could make her tap out.
In an almost taunting manner, Pauline tipped her head to the side and arched a brow. Almost as if to say, "come at me, bro." How could she have the audacity?
Peach took three steps forward, bringing her left arm back, she swung for Pauline's temple. Her fist connected with it's intended target. With a half spin Pauline fell to the ground with a thud. If this were Street Fighter, this would be the K.O screen.
Silence. And then? Deafening cheers. People went wild. This wasn't the catfight they were hoping for. This was way better!
"What the hell?" Pauline panted, holding her bleeding nose, despite the fact that she didn't get hit in the nose. "How are you so strong?"
"I kickbox four times a week? What do you expect?" Peach jeered, basking in her glory. People surrounded Peach, lifting her onto their shoulders, they started parading around.
"What is going on here?" Rosalina's voice boomed above all the noise, silencing the crowd once again.
"Uhh. . ."
"What the hell do you think you two are doing?" She yelled.
"Uhh. . ."
"Oh," Pauline feigned, "Peach just punched me in the head. I think I might have a concussion."
"Oh shut up Pauline," Rosalina turned to glare at her, "what's this I hear about you wanting revenge? You have to start a fight? At my party? Jesus Christ."
Rosalina stopped momentarily, but quickly continued, "I was just having a good time, but then I hear this sound like the fucking earth split open. I have to run off the roof to see what the fuck is happening, and I find you two thinking you can start Fight Club in my backyard?"
Rosalina turned to address the crowd, "Do you guys wanna get us busted by the cops? Seriously?"
People shook their heads, ashamed.
"But- but my head," Pauline whimpered, "it hurts so much."
"You know what, Pauline? Get off my property. I've heard all about your little plan. You've already caused enough damage. Leave," Rosalina pointed towards the front yard.
Not even watching to see if Pauline left- which she did, Rosalina addressed the crowd again. "If I hear anything like this happening again, you will personally have to fight me. Okay?"
"Now, go fuck off and party!"
The night continued uneventfully; well uneventful depending how you looked at it. There was still friendships ended, babies made, and alcohol consumed, but everybody did so in a way that didn't cause a commotion. People danced for miles, laughed until their throats hurt, and made memories that they wouldn't remember the next day if it weren't for the pictures. As time wore on, more people came and then left the party. This continued until only a few lone survivors were left. Fire burning low, music still playing quietly from a speaker somewhere, the gang sat leisurely on the patio.
"Doesn't he look cute like that?" Rosalina asked no one in particular, gesturing towards L who was curled up and asleep on a lawn chair.
"Yup," Yoshi said, "too bad I'm too baked to care."
"Fuck you, Christmas Tree," Rosalina retorted.
"You'd like that wouldn't you?" Yoshi raised an insinuating eyebrow.
Rosalina chose to ignore that remark, and silence fell around them. They were all so tired, yet Mario and Peach still had the energy to giggle and slow dance to any song that played. It was tiring just watching them.
"You guys suck, ya'know?" Peach pouted, sad her friends weren't enjoying the music like she was.
"Actually I swal-" Yoshi began, but was cut off by a swift punch to the gut from Rosalina.
"Don't even finish that thought."
Peach's posture fell. And in a sudden burst of sympathy laden energy, Rosalina was standing up, pulling Yoshi, Samus, and Luigi with her.
"C'mon," she persuaded, "do it for Peach."
So they danced. Well, more or less swayed to the music lazily. All four of them holding each other in an awkward cluster. Letting the music move them.
"You know what?" Samus asked, pulling away from the group suddenly. "I'm out. This is getting too hetero for my gay ass."
They mumbled goodbyes as they watched Samus lumber to the front yard. In one final attempt at making her stay, Yoshi yelled, "oh, c'mon Baby. I'm totally bi for you!"
Samus flipped him off as she continued. Yoshi shrugged, indifferent. He let go of Luigi and Rosalina, letting himself fall onto a nearby lounge chair. He was asleep and snoring before he even landed.
That left four.
Rosalina let herself lean into Luigi's chest, feeling his muscle. They moved groggily to the slow jam, barely shuffling their feet.
"I need to ask you something," Rosalina said abruptly, looking up to meet Luigi's eyes.
Rosalina felt Luigi tense. "Yeah, sure. What is it Rose?"
"What are we?"
Now that was a question Luigi wasn't sure how to answer, because he wasn't sure what they were.
"I mean," she continued, "ever since Halloween I don't know what to think about us."
She was right. Last Halloween, at Rosalina's party, Daisy had dumped Luigi, saying how it's not you, it's me, okay? He was upset, but okay with the result. He had loved Daisy, but he realized their personalities clashed far too much for them to work out in the long run. He remembered Rosalina coming up to him after, to comfort him. She said all the right things, and moved in the right way. Made him feel better. They had come together that night to form something beautiful. But they weren't sure what to do after that. They weren't exclusively dating each other, but they weren't just friends with benefits either. They were Schrodinger's relationship. Both dating and not dating at the same time. Luigi had felt so conflicted about his feelings about Rosalina, he could hardly be himself around her anymore. But seeing her here tonight, with smudged makeup, tired eyes, and her perfectly crooked smile, he knew. Without skipping a beat Luigi leaned in and kissed Rosalina, letting their bodies melt into each other.
"Ooh," Mario teased, "get some, bro."
Not even breaking apart, both Luigi and Rosalina simultaneously flipped Mario off.
Finally coming up for air, they laughed. They all laughed. Taking in the events of the night, it all felt so distant to them already. As if it had happened years ago, and not just hours. They were all exhausted but didn't want to sleep, in fear of missing out on something. But they knew in the morning there would be headaches and more than enough vomit to go around, and they wouldn't regret it for a minute. These were the memories that would last a lifetime. They wouldn't rather be anywhere else in the world. This is where they belonged. This is where they belonged.
"Don't want to close my eyes, don't want to fall asleep. 'Cause I'd miss you Babe, and I don't want to miss a thing."