Sirius

Hope walked in seconds after Moony had left. Sirius barely had time to compose himself. He didn't really understand what had happened between him and Moony, and what being his fake boyfriend would entail, but Moony had seemed so relieved when Sirius had agreed. Plus, Sirius was sure he could use this to his advantage. He wasn't sure how exactly, but he was thinking something to do with a point system and Moony's blushing.

Hope stepped forward and enveloped Sirius in a hug. He froze for a second, before wrapping one arm around her and patting her awkwardly on the back. It was weird. He wasn't really a hugging person, unless he was trying to get into their pants. And he certainly wasn't trying to get into Moony's mum's pants... Moony, on the other hand...

Sirius shook his head quickly, forcing that thought from his mind.

She pulled away and Sirius quickly put a smile on his face. Hope looked a lot like Moony. She was chubbier than her bony son, but the eyes were the same green. Her hair was a lighter brown than his, and flecked with grey. Her face was round and kind looking. She had the typical "mum-look", just like James's mum. Absolutely nothing like Sirius's mum.

Sirius felt his face darken, and quickly joked, "Should I start calling you mum?"

"Oh not yet, Sirius." Hope laughed. She added, sincerely, "I'm so glad he found you."

Moony appeared at the door then, holding a jar of pasta sauce. His eyes darted nervously between Sirius and Hope, before he relaxed into a smile. Sirius could tell it was forced. "I'm glad he found me too." Sirius said, smiling broadly at Moony.

Moony narrowed his eyes at Sirius behind Hope's back. Sirius spotted no sign of blushing on his face, he'd have to try harder. Moony brushed invisible dust off his top and cleared his throat, "I'm thinking pasta for dinner?"

"No, darling, don't be stupid." Sirius grinned. Darling. That was sure to work, Sirius knew from fourth year – when Moony and some boy from Hufflepuff had had a thing - that Moony hated pet names. Sure enough, the moment Sirius said the word, a pink tinge blossomed on Moony's face.

That's one point to me.

"We'll go out for dinner." Sirius said, he sidestepped Hope and walked towards Moony. He paused just in front of him and smiled easily. Moony narrowed his eyes at him slightly. Sirius knew he was suspicious, probably expecting Sirius to embarrass him in some other way, and Sirius wasn't about to let him down. He reached out and entwined their fingers, watching the pink in Moony's cheeks turn darker. Moony had long fingers and Sirius could feel the rough, raised skin of a few scars in his palm.

"I like to treat my boyfriend." Sirius added just loud enough for Hope to hear, mentally giving himself another point.

"Dinner out sounds like a lovely idea, Sirius!" Hope said. She glanced down at her outfit and pulled a face, "I'll get changed."

Sirius pulled Moony away from the door to allow Hope past. Once they saw her disappear into Moony's room, Moony yanked his hand away from Sirius and turned on him. Glaring, he hissed, "What the hell are you doing?"

"I'm being your boyfriend." Sirius said innocently.

"You're purposefully trying to embarrass me." Moony stated angrily, crossing his arms across his chest.

Sirius made an offended noise and placed his hand on his heart, in mock anger he asked, "How dare you!" Moony didn't look amused and Sirius smirked, dropping his hand, "What's the matter, Moony? I thought you wanted me to be your boyfriend."

Sirius closed the gap between them in a few steps, effectively trapping Moony between himself and the kitchen door. He leaned forward, until his face was only an inch away from Moony's. He could feel his breath on his cheek. Sirius could easily close the gap, easily press his lips to Moony's.

Moony unfolded his arms and attempted to push Sirius away, but Sirius grabbed his wrists firmly in one hand. Sirius trailed his free hand down Moony's side, watching Moony squirm as he tickled him. Sirius's hand paused at the waistband of Moony's jeans.

He saw a flash of panic in his friend's eye, and his smirk dissolved into laughter. This was going to be fun. Just before he released Moony's wrists, Sirius grabbed his wand out of his pocket.

"You're a tosser, Black." Moony cursed, before stomping up the stairs to get changed, pasta sauce still in hand.

"That's three points to me and none to you, you need to up your game, Moony." Sirius called after his retreating friend.

In response, Moony stuck his middle finger up at Sirius, without turning around.

Sirius laughed and jogged up the stairs. He walked into his own room and paused, glancing at the piles and piles of clothes on his floor. Tapping an odd rhythm on his leg with his fingers, he tried to think of what he could wear. What do you wear to a date with your fake boyfriend and his mother?

He got down on his knees and rooted through the first pile. At the dinner, Sirius would get to ten points way before Moony would even get one. No one embarrassed as easily as Moony did, especially not Sirius. He smiled to himself, poor Moony had no idea what was coming for him.

After throwing clothes around the room, Sirius found a white shirt he hadn't worn in centuries. He used his wand to get rid of the wrinkles and quickly changed into it. He glanced at the jeans he was wearing, they were relatively clean, he didn't need to change them. Finally he needed a tie, or something. Is that what boyfriends do? Wear ties?

Merlin's balls, I'm shit at this.

Sirius rubbed a hand over his face, and back through his hair. He wasn't even Moony's real boyfriend, why was he getting so worked up over this? He didn't even bother to wear shirts for girls he was sleeping with. But then again, Moony was more important than some nameless girl who made her way into Sirius's bed.

A tentative knock sounded at his door, and Sirius quickly glanced at his reflection. He looked like a tosser. The last time he'd worn a shirt was when he was in Hogwarts – maybe this shirt was his school shirt. He undid the top button and then redid it, before undoing it again. No matter what he did, he still looked like a dick.

"Come in." He called.

Moony poked his head in and opened his mouth to speak. Instead of saying whatever he'd came to say, he froze, his eyes trailing up and down Sirius.

Sirius pulled a face and turned back to his reflection, "I know, I look like a tosser."

"No, you look..." Moony trailed off, before clearing his throat and stepping into the room. Sirius watched him step between the piles of clothes, and had to admit, he cleaned up well. He wore a navy short-sleeved shirt with all the buttons done up, dark jeans and smart shoes. Sirius looked down at his scruffy trainers self consciously. How Hope believed Moony would go for someone like him was beyond him.

Not that Sirius wanted to be Moony's boyfriend, of course.

It was just blatently obvious that Moony was too good for him.

"A-ha!" Moony exclaimed, pulling a black tie from one of the piles of clothes. He walked over to Sirius and waved it at him, "I knew you still had it."

"Is that a tie?" Sirius said, drawing his brows together, "Since when do I own a tie?"

"Since you borrowed it off me to impress that girl." Moony waved his hand dismissively, "Anyway, it'll make that shirt look better. Come here." Sirius hesitated. "Come on!" Moony ordered.

Sirius stepped forward, dodging a pizza box. Moony closed the distance between them and threw his hands over Sirius's shoulders. Sirius tried to keep his thoughts innocent, usually when people have their arms over his shoulders like this he was kissing them, or trailing his tongue down their neck while his hands... Sirius snapped his eyes away from Moony's neck, ignoring the spreading heat through his chest.

Moony seemed oblivious to the thoughts in Sirius's head, he popped Sirius's collar up, and wrapped the black tie around his neck. Sirius watched his nimble fingers tie the tie quickly. He tried not to think about how close Moony was, or how he could smell the peppermint shower gel he used.

When Moony was done, Sirius all but leapt away from him. Moony didn't seem to mind, he took in Sirius's look and Sirius shuffled his feet nervously.

"You look great, Sirius." Moony said sincerely. Sirius opened his mouth to reply but no words came out. Moony was looking at him so weirdly, like this was the first time he'd seen Sirius in so long, and Sirius felt heat rush up his neck. Then all of a sudden, the look on Moony's face disappeared and in a smug voice, he said, "One point to me."

Sirius narrowed his eyes at him, relief and something else – that was definitely not disappointment – flooded through him, and Moony walked past. Holding the door open, he said, "Come on, my mum's waiting for us."

"It's still three to one, I'm so gonna to win." Sirius said, following Moony into the hallway.

"No, you're not." Moony said.

"Five galleons says I'll get to ten before you."

"Deal."

Dessert had arrived and so far the score stood at nine:six to Sirius. There had been subtle dick jokes, some not so subtle dick jokes, pet names and even hand holding, but Sirius had stayed in the lead most of the time. He only needed one more point. He dug his fork into his chocolate cake and wondered how to get the final point. He felt like he should do something big for the final point, but couldn't think of what.

Maybe a kiss? He glanced up at Moony. Some raspberry sorbet had escaped Moony's mouth and Sirius watched his tongue dart out to catch it. For a brief, half a second, Sirius had felt the strange urge to catch the sorbet with his own mouth. He blamed it on the wine. When Moony caught him looking, Sirius glanced away faster than was necessary.

Okay, he thought to himself, no kissing. Moony's lips are off limits. No matter how kissable and soft- Focus Sirius!

Maybe he could start a game of footsie? No, he had kept his trainers on and didn't want to get mud all over Moony's jeans.

He sighed to himself. He needed this point.

Thankfully, an answer came in the form of a question asked by Hope Lupin. Swallowing a mouthful of lemon drizzle cake, she asked, "So, Sirius, how did you two meet?"

Sirius smiled, an elaborate lie already forming in his head. Before he could even open his mouth though, Moony had already answered, "We shared a dorm, mum, remember?"

Sirius put his fork into his mouth and ate more cake. He'd get this point, no matter how much Moony tried to stop it. Sirius was thinking about spoon-feeding Moony his cake, when Hope rolled her eyes and said, "I know you shared a dorm, Remus. I meant, how did this," she waved a hand between them, "happen?"

Sirius spoke before Moony even had a chance to swallow his sorbet, "It was in seventh year."

Now that he'd started speaking, he had no idea where this story was going to take him, but he went with it anyway. He couldn't risk Moony getting a word in and getting more points. Maybe somewhere along the way he'd make Moony blush.

"It was Christmas break and we'd all decided to stay at Hogwarts to... erm..." Sirius hesitated, they'd stayed over during Christmas break, in seventh year, to finally try and build a living snowman the size of the castle, but somehow he didn't think Hope would appreciate that.

"To catch up on work." Moony offered, helpfully.

Sirius nodded at him, "Yeah, to catch up on work. Anyway, it was Christmas Eve and we were..." Again Sirius found he couldn't continue his story. He was going to say it was Christmas Eve and we were all black out drunk but Hope probably wouldn't appreciate that either.

"Doing our potions homework." Moony finished again, eating some of his sorbet, barely containing his smile.

"Yes, potions homework." Sirius said, stifling a laugh, "Me and Moo- I mean Remus were sat on his bed, and I was very... into my potions homework, but he was more... into his potions homework." Sirius could hear this story getting more and more disjointed as he went on. Maybe it was the candlelight or maybe not, but if Sirius looked close enough he could see a slight pink tinge to Moony's cheeks.

He was also staring a little too intently at his sorbet, Sirius guessed he was remembering the story – the true story. Sirius finished, "And long story short, Remus kissed me."

"Whoa!" Moony said, snapping his head up to look at Sirius. Sirius could definitely see the red on his cheeks now and mentally gave himself another point. Moony aimed his spoon at Sirius, "You kissed me."

Sirius laughed, "No, you kissed me. I remember."

Hope laughed and looked between them happily. Sirius winked at her. He knew the true story well, and he had been the one to kiss Moony. He had been drunk and Moony had looked so cute in his untucked shirt and loose tie. Really, blackout drunk was a good look on Moony.

But he wasn't going to admit that here and now was he? Not when he could win five galleons.

"You liar! You kissed me and you know it!" Moony said through a smile.

Sirius grinned, and leaned back in his chair, his neck cracking, "You can't prove anything."

Moony smiled back, his whole face lighting up when Sirius winked at him. Sirius ate the final mouthful of his cake, feeling warmth in his chest – it was probably the wine and the chocolate, and nothing to do with the way Moony was looking at him.

Hope stood up and excused herself to the bathroom. When she disappeared, Sirius leaned over the table towards Moony. He smelt like wine and peppermint, a surprisingly nice combination. Sirius moved towards Moony's ears, his lips accidentally bumping the lobe and whispered, "That's five galleons to me."

The tips of Moony's ears tinged pink.