Disclaimer: Not my characters and I'm not making money.

Chapter 1

The day of the funeral dawned bright and clear and cheerful. It was so Tonks-like that I almost started crying as soon as I woke up. Then I reminded myself that I needed to be the strong one, for my boys. That made me pause. A few months ago the men I considered "my boys" were Harry and Ron, but now my boys were Remus and Teddy. At that realization I sat down on the edge of my bed in shock. That was the way that Remus found me.

"Hey 'Mione are you ready to go... Hey, what's wrong?" Remus walked over and sat down next to me on my bed. He looked concerned.

"It's nothing Remus I'm fine. We've got to get going. Is Teddy ready?" I tried to act cheery and I tried to act strong but I knew that I wasn't fooling Remus. The look he gave me confirmed it and also told me we'd talk later. We then grabbed Teddy and headed out.

The service was sweet. It was so like Tonks and I had a hard time keeping my emotions in check. I sat there next to Remus who was holding a very confused Teddy. I watched the tears work their way down Remus' face. I reached over and grabbed his hand. He squeezed in thanks and held tight.

After the service Andromeda took Teddy. She told us that she would really like a part of her daughter with her today. Remus handed him over and he and I left.

We ended up at a muggle bar not far from where I'd grown up. We then proceeded to get completely drunk before heading home. Once back at Grimmauld Place again we grabbed the first full bottle of firewhiskey we saw and we crashed on a couch in the library.

Grief makes people do funny things, things they never would have done on their own. Thus, two of the least likely people you'd probably ever think we're drunk out if their minds. And when you're that drunk you completely forget that there are things that shouldn't be said. Lines that shouldn't be crossed. Clothes that should always stay on.

Most of that night was fuzzy up until that point but then it became increasingly clear. I was sitting next to Remus on the couch, passing the bottle of firewhiskey back to him, because we were so far gone we didn't even care about glasses. That's when he said it.

"Mione do you know how pretty you are?" I paused. No one had really ever called me pretty, maybe my parents but I was their only child so they were biased.

"What do you mean Remus?"

"You've got such pretty brown eyes, like chocolate. I love chocolate. And your skin is so soft," he began to stroke my cheek. It felt really nice and I was having a hard time remembering why the feelings growing in the pit of my stomach were a bad idea.

"Remus, my skin isn't all soft. I have scars all over." I took off my jumper to show him the word "mudblood" carved into my arm. He kissed it.

"I'm a werewolf. I have scars too. They don't make you any less desirable to me." I looked up into his eyes and he continued. "We've both been through a war, a war where you're best friend was constantly hunted. Those scars you are a proof that you've survived."

He gave me a hungry look then and I was confused until I realized that I was shirtless in front of him. I was slightly frightened when he moved closer, his hand resting on my thigh. "I want you." I was shocked. Then he kissed me and the world tipped.

His tongue sought entrance to my mouth and I quickly submitted. Then, as his tongue slid in his hands began to move and explore my body. They caressed my back and stomach, tracing the scars I had. I began to move my hands as well. Soon his shirt was off and he growled at me "upstairs, now." I didn't object at he pulled me towards his bedroom. I found that I couldn't. I wanted this too. I wanted to find out what it feels like to be connected to another person. I needed this, and Remus did too.

AN: sorry for the abrupt ending to the chapter it was getting much longer than I would've liked. Please review! Thnx.