"Well hasn't Dil gotten smart?" I say. Chuckie drops the flashlight. I can't see Tommy, but I can tell he's about to faint. Now they know my dirty little secret. Whoop-dee-damn-doo. "You guy's know, so untie me."
Tommy unties me. Chuckie turns on the light. They both look guilty. They should. They kidnapped me, interrogated me, screamed at me, tied me up, tightened the rope to where I couldn't even breathe, all because I don't love Kimi. I'm starting to hate Kimi. I want to go home, but Lil is there with Kimi, who is probably crying. If I went home, they'd probably never leave me alone. Suzie won't let me in unless I tell her what's wrong. Angelica is not an option. She's just not.
As they back up I stand, brushing myself off. I don't look at either of them, choosing to focus on Dil, who is looking very smug. Jerk. No, jerk is too mild. Two-faced fucking bastard. Fuck him. Fuck him up the ass with a jar of pickles. I silently flip Dil the finger before opening the door and walking outside.
"Where are you going to go?" Dil asks, leaning against the doorframe. Recently, Dil has become my best friend. He can read me so well. That's probably how he knew.
"Park." I say before heading in the opposite direction of my house. Dil nods in understanding. When I say park, I don't mean an actual park. I mean a place that Dil and I found. It's a construction site for something that was never finished. It's been abandoned. We take our bikes there all the time. I walk faster, down a hill and then another, until I come to where I left my bike. I get on and pedal as fast as I can. As I go, the houses around me get older and older. The side walk get's more and more cracked. And I see more and more…lawn gnomes. Why are there always so many lawn gnomes?
I try to ignore the pointy headed freaks as I come to the wooden fence that guards the path to my safe haven. I pedal up the path and up the hill. As I feel the wind hit my face on the way down, I already feel a bit better. Trees on either side of me give the air a pine fresh scent. It's really relaxing. I can hear birds and squirrels who have returned here, after almost losing their homes. It's the beautiful song of the forest.
One more turn in the path and I can see the rusty metal gates of my favorite "park". I don't hesitate to get of my bike and jump the fence. We've never been able to get the gate open. We've even tried welding equipment. Nothing. I head to my favorite large pipe. It's big enough to fit the whole gang in there. It sits up on a couple of steel beams, which sit on a huge pile of dirt the size of my house. And everyone still thinks I'm afraid of heights. I climb and stand looking down on half of the construction site. My safe haven. I sit down and cross my legs and wait for I don't know how long. Clouds roll in and cast a shadow. A small drizzle starts, then a light rain, then a down pour. As thunder and lightning strikes, I find myself immensely relieved that this pipe doesn't conduct electricity.
Time goes by and small animals decide to join me in here. Well, except for the turtle. That's probably been headed here all day. Four mice run inside from in front of me. I guess they aren't scared because they know I'm still here for the same reason they are. Shelter from the rain. Good thing I left my bike under a tree, other wise my mom would be pretty pissed. My pocket vibrates. The animals around me don't move. I take my cell out and answer it.
"Phil, Lil is headed your way!" Dil almost screams. What!?
"How the hell does she even know were I am!? Why is she coming after me anyway!?" I ask, looking around to make sure I can't see her outline already.
"She came barging in our house demanding to know were you were. She had Kimi with her. She tortured me to tell her were you were." Dil tells me. He sounds apologetic. "I'm sorry."
"Its okay, it's okay." No it's not, no it's not. "I think I can deal with her." No I can't. "I think I've had enough time to calm down." I need help!
"If you say so…" I know he doesn't believe me. I don't believe me either. He hangs up. I hang up to. I put my phone back in my pocket and wait for my punishment for being such a sick bastard. I know exactly what she'll do. First she'll attack me, and then she'll yell, question me while unknowingly insulting herself, and then be completely disgusted. I hug my knees to my chest. My life is now over.
The rain is starting to die down. Some of the animals walk away. Others choose not to go until the rain has left. I agree with them. I'm also awaiting my doom, so I might not get to enjoy the sun like they will. I'll be left in the mud, with a puddle of blood around me. Lil is going to kill me. I guess I'll just tell her and get it over with. No more hiding. I need to be honest with her.
The bushes about five feet away from the gate move a little. Lil steps through, bringing the sunshine with her. The animals around me leave. I guess they sense the raw rage coming from Lil. This wasn't how she was supposed to find out. She wasn't supposed to find out. This wasn't supposed to happen. She jumps the fence and looks around for me. Her eyes rest on the steel beams under my pipe. I quickly move farther back. Unfortunatly, one of the animals apparently left a rock in here, because my foot hit it and it fell out. Lil's eyes shoot up and now she's looking right at me. I can't breath.
"Phillip. Down here. Now." Oh shit. "I need to talk to you." I'm dead. I silently jump out of the pipe and skid down the hill. I try to enjoy the wind against my face, because this might be the last time I ever do. I try to enjoy how high up I am, because I might not get to climb back up. As I reach the bottom, I try not to focus on the pain I know is coming.
"Phillip, why would you do that to Kimi? You know you lo-"
"No, I don't." I interrupt. The look on her face tells me she doesn't believe me. "I don't even know why everyone thinks I do. Kimi is a friend. I didn't even think of her as a girl until last Tuesday when she started talking about the newest gossip about The Jonas brothers. The Jonas brothers. What could I possibly have in common with those generic cocksuckers? Back to Kimi. Let me guess. She ran to you, crying her eyes out about how I 'didn't care about her feelings' and 'broke her heart'. I really have no romantic feelings for her, whatsoever. So far, Dil was the only one who could figure out who I am in love with. And you guys think Tommy is the smart one."
She doesn't say anything for a while. She just stares at me blankly. I think I disarmed her with that rant. It's just that she was going to accuse me of loving Kimi, and I was already tied up and nearly blinded. Why make a bad day suck worse? Her eyes come back into focus and I can tell she's got questions. Scratch that. Why not make a bad day suck worse?
"But-but you have to love Kimi. Who else could it be?" Lil says. "Tommy told me you've been staring at my friends."
"Tommy is an idiot. To everyone else, the girl I love isn't even a possibility. I'm a sick, sick little boy, and I don't deserve her." I state.
"Are you secretly dating?" Lil asks. I chuckle.
"I can't even tell her. Not without losing her." I say, a sad smile on my face.
"Why not? Just tell her when you get the chance." Lil says. I can't believe what I'm about to say. She'll probably hate me, or just leave, or tell everyone that I'm a freak.
"That's the thing. I'll never get the chance to tell you."