Author's Note: Thanks for all the Reviews, keep them up and I'll update quicker. This chapter has Pucas and Brucas. This is Brucas end game but Lucas is confused.
Chapter 2: Understanding
I feel bad for Haley. When you see her at that table it's not hard tell how out of place she feels. She steals glances over at me every so often. Each time she does she tries to smile at me. Knowing Haley the way I do I can tell the smile is meant as an apology. She wants me to know that she misses me. The only problem is that were far past the point where a smile can fix what she's done.
I also feel bad because she also sends smiles at Nathan. Of course he's to busy glaring at me to see that. Even though Haley has abandoned me I just wanna go over there and punch him in the face. I want with every ounce of me to make him pay attention to her, instead of taking advantage of her.
If there was one advantage to my best friend joining the table of my loving siblings, it was that I had more of a chance to look at the two angels that occupied my thoughts and dreams.
How do I describe Peyton Sawyer? To the outside world Peyton Sawyer was the cheerleading, emo music loving best friend of brooked Davis. She was dating Nathan Scott, and had been for the better part of three years. To me there relationship made no sense, in fact the only time I see them talk is when there arguing. From what I can tell Peyton is close with Riley as well, as they seem to spend a lot of time talking. I can tell she doesn't like Haley, by all the insults she throws her way. Maybe if Haley didn't make her crush on Nathan so obvious, Peyton wouldn't be so jealous. Between Brooke and Peyton, Peyton was always the mysterious one. She has not spoken a single word to me in all these years. And she definitely has not done anything nice towards me. In fact the only interaction I've ever had with her is when she's laughing at me when Nathan pushes me around, or when Riley insults me. And if that's the way she treats me I cant help but wonder why I even bother. I remember the day my friend junk from the river court told me she had a web cam blog.
(Flashback - River court)
"You guys remember Tom Dugan from grade school?" Junk asks while passing the ball to Fergie.
"He used to live next door to you, right?" I ask
"Some guy snapped him with a wet towel, and he lost one of his testicles." At this everyone starts to laugh.
" Just saying what I heard."Junk responds with a frustrated tone
"Anyway, man, what you reading these days?"Skills Asks me.
"Steinbeck, the winter of our discontent."I say while carefully adjusting the ball in my hands for my next shot.
"Let me hear some."
"Nah."I say nervously. I always hate being in the spotlight. Except with basketball, this game is the one place I don't feel insecure. I can just play for the game. No pressure.
" Come on, dog. You know I be reading vicariously through you."Everyone laughs at skills. But my attention is now drawn to the black car driving down the road beside the River court. More specifically I'm drawn to the blonde haired girl in that car.
"Peyton Sawyer. You seen her webcam? In her bedroom, I hear she's naked on it, like, all the time."Junk says. I overhear him say it but my eyes are still drawn to that black car. As she leaves our sight I realize I'm not going to be able to concentrate on basketball anymore. At least until I have a look at this website.
I remember rushing away from the game we were playing, lying about have a cold. It seemed like an eternity, the time it took me to turn on my computer. Than another eternity to get the damn dialup to work. I found her blog without much difficulty though. And when I did the camera panned out to a feed of her room. The room was very dark, and had posters and drawings plastered all over the walls. Luckily it took only a few minutes for her to return to her computer, and when she did I have to admit it was kind of strange. She just sat there staring at the computer. From time to time she would lean her head forward and I assume she was drawing something by the pen she had in her hand. She looked utterly depressed. It was as if happiness had never known her.
I'm drawn to Peyton Sawyer for reasons I myself don't fully understand. I know that at one point I could say that I was obsessed with Peyton Sawyer. I could say it and believe it as easily as one draws in breath. It was my obsession for Peyton along with my love for Brooke Davis that was always the things I could trust in this world. But lately I find myself feeling something uncontrollable towards Brooke. I can't quite explain the change. The way people talk about Peyton I can't help but think how similar we are in so many different ways. I guess once the webcam brought me more insight into her life, and the years of her neglect started to wear on me, I find myself driven more and more away from Peyton. But as I sit here now looking at her, I can't help but be drawn even more to the impossibly perfect brunette to her right. And now that I think of it, my favourite moments of watching the webcam are when there's a certain bubbly brunette visiting.
How do I describe Brooke Davis? Infatuation. Lust. Complete and utter perfection. Every day I stare at her. Whether it was in our English class, our Biology Class I found my eyes were driven to stare at her like a moth to the flame. I long for the moments when she appears on Peyton's webcam. She's so carefree, and cheery. She lives a life I could only dream about. And unlike Peyton she has never joined in on any of the abuses I've endured througout the years. In fact I swear I've caught her smiling at me a couple times. And I guess those are the reasons why I'm drawn so much to her. Unlike Peyton she's spoken to me a whole two times in my life. Once to ask me for a pen in sixth grade. And the second time she talked to me was a year ago in grade nine, and I have no idea why she talked to me then.
(Flashback – School)
I look down at my watch. And see that its only 3 minutes till class starts. The halls are empty, and I head towards my class. As I'm walking the doorway opens and into the empty hallway comes my angel. She looked gorgeous in her cheerleading outfit that hugged her curves in all the right ways. I hadn't realized, but I had completely stopped dead, and was now in the middle of the hallway staring at her.
"Like what you see?"She tilted her head while she said it, and if it's possible I found her even more beautiful.
"Umm…what do you mean…I wasn't staring "My mind is screaming that I'm an idiot. How could I have been so obvious? And for a guy who loves English class so much, I was now completely at a loss as to what to say to escape this.
"It's ok. Really it is. I'd stare too if I were you." She gave me a smile that was full of her beautiful dimples, and my heart melted, and then she moved her hand to my shoulder."And since were on the topic. You're not looking so bad yourself baby" Her hand rubbed my shoulder softly, and my mind went blank. We must have stood there for ten seconds. She was flirtatiously rubbing my shoulder, and I was just staring at her. There were so many things I wanted to say. All I wanted to do was reach out and and kiss her but instead i said
"Thanks" I finally stuttered out. My mind screaming that i was an idiot. Of all the think I could say. I said thanks.
"No problem Gorgeous. Oh by the way I…"She started to say until she was interrupted
"What's this?" At the sound of my brother's voice, Brooke's arm recoiled from my shoulder like it was bit by a snake. The horrible scowl on Nathan's face told me everything about what his reaction was going to be.
"Nothing Nathan, just heading to class" She mouthed bye to me than she walked past me. I turned to watch her walk away but I was quickly halted by my brother. Who quickly proceeded to shove me to the ground.
"Don't you know your place by now?" He hovered over me
"Nathan, I…"I started but I was interrupted again, this time by his foot to my rib
"What makes you think you have any right talking to her you bastard?"He gave me a what the hell is wrong with me look" No one cares about you. Just get it through your head and stop trying to be more than the pathetic loser you are."
"I didn't..."I started but was interrupted by his foot to my rib again
"You know what loser, I'm gonna let you off this time but if I catch you talking to Brooke or anyone above you again." He pulled out a thermos from his backpack and proceeded to pour it on me "It will be a lot more damage I do to you than just a dry cleaning bill" And with that he kicked my backpack than walked towards wherever the hell he had class today.
Let me just say I don't know if I've ever hated a human being as much as I hated my brother Nathan in that moment. Even the constant name callings, and the occasional beatings he and his band of goons handed out to me on a regular basis haven't angered me as much as his interruption of my first real conversation with Brooke. His whole life must revolve around finding ways to hurt me. I suppose he has help from his sister and father. I can picture Brooke in that moment as clearly as if it was yesterday. Her voice was so sweet and simply being in her presence calmed me more then anything elce I've ever experienced in my entire life. I just hope I will get another chance to talk to her. Hear that Raspy voice flirt with me again, or the touch of her hand on my shoulder. I can't help but wonder what might have happened had Nathan not interrupted me. Would she have walked me to class? Maybe asked me out on a date? Ha, what's wrong with me, she probably just wanted me to do her homework or something.
"Hey dawg, what you doing? Skills says while sitting down at the table, partly obscuring my view of Brooke
"Reading" I say while taking the earphones out of my ear, and moving on the bench a little so I can get a better look at Brooke
"Nice, nice. I see you're talkative as ever Luke."Skills says while chuckling to himself, he doesn't seem to notice my eyes are not aimed towards him but over his shoulder at a certain brunette.
"I'm sorry skills, just kind of got a lot on my mind" I try to keep my attention to him, but I find my eyes roam towards the girls
"Well, at least your distracted by hot legs this time and not some dead white guys book" he laughs again, and at this comment my head snaps towards him
"Hot legs...what are you talking about?"
"Oh come on dawg you know exactly who I'm talking about. A certain curly haired blonde perhaps."
"Ya...I guess your right" I say it, but I'm not quite sure if it's the blonde that's on my mind anymore. Not when Brooke is wearing a skirt that leaves very little to the imagination.
"Ha. You bet your ass I'm right" He pauses for a moment to drink his Gatorade, and then he starts waving at someone behind me."Yo Mouth get your scrawny ass over here!" He yells causing most of the students on the quad to start staring at our table. Including a glare from my brother. Does he think that he's superman and he's going to shoot a laser beam out of his eyes, or is he just such a grouch that he can't even smile.
"Hey Luke" Mouth pats me on the shoulder than sits beside me "Skills, was it really necessary to yell at me now everyone is looking. I was coming over" Poor mouth has his head lowered a bit trying to hide himself, from the staring students.
"Oh whatever" Skills says while taking another drink of his Gatorade
"So, not that I'm not happy that I have company at lunch, but shouldn't you be eating your lunch at home" I point at skills" And shouldn't you be in the Media room buddy" I pat mouth on the shoulder
"Ya...well the media club broke up early today, and since the football team is at an away game. And the basketball team is suckling at Nathan, I wasn't really delayed by any bullies today."Mouth laughs while he says it but from the look in his eyes I know it's nothing even close to funny.
"Well, I may or may not have forgotten my keys at your house Luke" All three of us laugh at skills. At the sound of our happiness, Nathan sends me over another glare. His death glare is interrupted by the lunch bell going off. I watch Nathan stomp away from the table towards the school. I feel bad for Haley, because he doesn't even wait for her. I really can't believe how big of an asshole my own brother is.
"Let's go guys" I grab mouth by the shoulders and drag him along, while Skills follows behind as we head towards the school. As I'm walking I can't tear my eyes away from Brooke. It honestly can't be possible to be that perfect.
The rest of the day goes by very slowly since I don't have any more classes with Brooke or Peyton. But eventually the day ends and after walking the three blocks home I walk in the front door, and see my mom at the stove."What are you making mom?"I walk over to the couch and turn on the TV. Not before I throw my coat on the chair, which is sure to get me a lecture from mom.
"Some stew. We're going to eat it tomorrow when you come by the cafe for supper."She sends me a smile than returns her attention to the stew
"Why are we eating at the cafe when we have such a beautiful dining table right over there?"I'm hoping she accepts my sucking up so I dont have to explain why I dont want to go to the cafe to eat.
"Luke. What's going on?"She turns around and gives me a comforting look. I guess I need to work on my sucking up.
"What do you mean ma, nothing's going on. I just don't feel like eating at the cafe with all the people around." I said it but even I didn't believe it. Id eaten at the cafe hundreds upon hundred of times.
"Ok, well if there's no problem then I'll just invite Haley over here for dinner."
"No!"I hadn't meant to yell it but, I really just couldn't stand the thought of Haley in this house. Especially when she knows I won't be rude to her in front of my mother. At the sound of my raised tone my mom seemed to bolt into the living room
"Is there something going on with you and Haley, Luke? She walked in front of the TV before she finished the rest of her speach."Because you two are best friends, you should be leaning on Haley not isolating yourself from her. If you did something to upset her just apologize and she'll forgive you. You and Haley have always been there for each other, don't you want to fix things?"Of course she would think I did something.
"I would if I could "I mumbled with my head down
"What did you say Lucas?"She said sternly
"Nothing I'm going to go out for a run I'll be back later." I stand up from the couch and grab my coat off the chair
"Lucas were not done here."Her voice wasn't angry, it was filled with understanding and it killed me to walk out.
"Ya we are mom."I walked to the door and opened it" Love you mom I'll be back in a bit "I knew I was being a spoiled little brat, but she could never understand my point of view without me tarnishing my mother's opinion of Haley. I knew how much my mom's opinion meant to Haley, and I loved her too much to put her through that. If only she loved me enough.
They say you never appreciate the most critical moments in your life. The moments that decide the kind of person you're going to be in your life, are so often ignored as nothing of interest at the time. After I had run out of the argument with my mom I called up the guys and luckily they all could come out except for Jimmy who didn't even answer my call. We were shooting it around for awhile, well at least Fergie and Skills were. I was too preoccupied with my own thoughts to shoot at the moment
"Yo Luke, where you at man" Fergie knocks on my head while the rest of the guys just laugh. I realize how stupid I must look. Standing to the side of the River court, ball in hand just thinking.
"No where...just thinking"
"Is this thinking gonna get sent into penthouse for publication my man" skills says while going in for a layup. This makes the whole group laugh, and I have to admit I join in. "common Luke lets shoot for teams, I don't have all day waiting for you to finish your sexual day dreams about Peyton" Though I have to admit my sexual dreams were more directed towards the breathtaking Brooke Davis as of late.
I chuckle while turning around to see Mouth sitting on the Bench gesturing for me to shoot the ball, so he can start announcing." Fine" I pause to take the shot. I release and as always it goes straight in. "Get ready to lose."
We continue to play for the next half an hour. Me and Fergie vs. skills and Junk, just another normal night on the river court. Just as I make another winning shot, I can't help but notice Keith's Jeep is parked aimed towards the court. Now that's not shocking, Keith and I are really close. I guess you could say he's the only adult male influence I have in my life. He stuck by my mom after Dan abandoned us. He's a really good guy and he even gave me a job at his auto garage when I had no knowledge of cars. I suppose he has stopped to watch us play basketball before. So I guess what's really shocking is that in the passenger seat is Coach Durham. The only times I've had any kind of interaction with Coach Durham is on a rare basis when he fills in as our teacher during gym class. He coaches Nathan, has Riley as a cheerleader, and coached Dan when he played at Tree Hill. So I can only imagine what terrible things he's heard said about me.
"Hey guys, why is Coach Durham with Keith watching us play?"I point over at my uncles jeep.
"Who knows Luke" Skills grabs the ball from me and starts dribbling in front of me "Now stop stalling and get back in the game. Unless of course you're afraid the Skills that kills is gonna smoke your scrawny ass" The game continues and I forget all about Keith and Coach Durham watching us. And when I drain another shot for the win I look back over and see that my uncles green jeep is nowhere in sight.
Authors Note: Please Review, it's very helpful and makes me update sooner
Dianehermans: Glad you like Brucas like I do. Some Pucas is necessary, but trust me it's not the end game
Brucas Lover 135: Thanks. And yes just trust me
Toddntan: I tried to show that he has the River court gang in this one
Sopiabush 123: Ya Haley's a little misguided right now. I am a big fan of the Lucas/Haley friendship so expect it eventually