Hello, I'm Twink, and I'll be writing this portion on the Everything Parody. Please enjoy. It's mainly The Host, but also has Twilight, Harry Potter, and Warriors characters in it…Oh, and as a note, we made this up when I wasn't very far into The Host, so Melanie and Wanderer don't get along as well, and they kinda randomly find Jared…
Oh, this fount is going on inside Melanie's over-crowded head
And this one is them talking out loud
Melanie: Oh look Wanderer! It's Jared; can we go talk to him?
Wanderer: Yes, but he'll know I'm not you…
Wanderer walks over to Jared Hi Jared!
Jared: Melanie?
Tigerstar: No, it is I, the Great Tigerstar!
Jared: Mel, you okay?
Wanderer: Hey! Where'd you come from!?
Tigerstar: The Dark Forest…and I brought my son, Hawkfrost.
Hawkfrost: hi waves
Melanie: How many people are in my head now?
Wanderer: 4, including you.
Wanderer: Umm…no Jared, we're not really fine…
Jared: We? scowls
Melanie: See what you've done! Say 'I', not 'we'!
Wanderer: sorry…
Voldomort(sp?): I am Voldomort!
Jared: okay…
Wanderer: Another person!? Why can't I just live in peace…?
Melanie: Look who's talking.
Tigerstar: Oh, for the record, we're not people. We're cats…
Hawkfrost: Yah…
Voldomort: I'm a wizard!
Melanie: Oh, for the love of…
Wanderer: Uhh…Jared, what would you do if I said there were five consciousnesses inside my head?
Jared: Well…I probably wouldn't believe you.
Melanie: But Jared! It's true! Help me get rid of them!
Wanderer: He can't hear you…
Melanie: No duh! I can still try…
James: Dang it! There's no food for me here either! I can't believe I let that last girl get away from me!
Victoria: It's okay, those pitiful excuses for vampires protecting her were stronger than we anticipated…
Jared: Am I missing something? Mel…?
Melanie: Uhh…excuse me!?
James and Victoria: What?
Wanderer: Before Melanie uses some vulgar language, I think she wants to know who you are and why you're in her head…
Victoria: well, I'm Victoria…
James: And I'm James. We're vampires.
Melanie: …………What is this!? Like, villains-congregate-in-Melanie's-head day!?
Wanderer: sure seems like it…
Melanie: Okay, everyone. GO AWAY!!
Wanderer: I'm staying.
Melanie: Fine, Wanderer can stay, I guess. But everyone else has to leave.
Hawkfrost: Make us.
Melanie: breaks through to control of her voice Everyone out!! NOW!
Jared: Melanie? Out of what? takes a step backwards
Melanie: Jared! hugs him Help, please. There are six people inside of my head, not including me.
Everyone: Ah-hem.
Melanie: Oh, fine. Two cats, two vampires, a wizard, and a parasite.
Jared: OMFG! How!?
Melanie: I don't know, it was just me and the 'soul' until about five minutes ago…
Jared: One of them is in your head? How do I know your not it, just talking to me? breaks her grasp
Melanie: Because I love you?
Melanie: I blame you!
Wanderer: it's okay. You usually do.
Scourge: I am Scourge! Leader of BloodClan!
Melanie: ABNOTHER one!?
Tigerstar: hide me!
Hawkfrost: You can't hide; we're voices in someone's head.
Melanie: and that 'someone' sure wishes you'd leave…
Melanie: see? If I was a parasite, I wouldn't keep yelling random titles and statement…that's everyone that keeps joining the 'party' in my brain. sigh
Jared: Your eyes are reflective.
Melanie: That's Wanderer's fault scowl
Wanderer: suck it up.
Melanie: Oh, was that just an angry comment. teasingly
Wanderer: Yah, well, I'm abit tense with all these extra challenges in your head. No one told me this was possible…
Melanie: I don't think it is…
Everyone: it's not? disappears
Wanderer: What was that?
Melanie: I wish I knew…
Wanderer: uhh…Bye Jared, we love you! runs away