Once upon a time in a faraway galaxy, a fair princess was captured by an evil wizard…
"NOOOOOO!" Screamed Leia. "I refuse to marry someone as hideously wrinkly and evil as you!" She struggled with the evil wizard Sideous, but he was far too powerful. "You dare to reject me? Well, then, I have the perfect revenge…"
"What are you going to do to me?" she gasped in horror, as the wizard raised his arms and began to chant.
Sleep little princess, don't say a word
Jedis can't save you with their shiny swords
You will sleep for a million years
Or at least till I forget this song or clean my shears
Leia stared at him. "You know that made absolutely no sense, right? –And I thought they were called lightsabers."
"SLEEP! SLEEP!" shrieked the aggravated Emperor/wizard. Strangely enough, Leia began to feel very drowsy. "What have—you—done…"