Disclaimer: Don't own them. I won't even pretend to.

Notes: This is a continuation of the last chapter. Also there was no beta so all mistakes are my own. Like always, enjoy!

Happy Birthday, lily moonlight. This one's for you :D

Unapologize

Chapter Two

Sid was cleaning his autopsy table off when she walked in.

"I haven't seen you in here in a while. What can I do for you?"

She sighed. "Am I insane? Like clinically?"

"I don't th-"

"I mean, how else can you explain what happened? I say the most stupid things ever, and I can't even come up with an explanation for it!"

"What di-"

She slammed her hands on the table before continuing. "I told him that I loved him! I didn't even mean to. I meant to say that I love pie – 'cause that's what we were having. Anyway, I went to say pie and 'you' just came out."

Sid sighed, not knowing if he would be interrupted again. "Wha-"

"And I tried to pull it off and make it sound like something else, but I just froze. It was so obvious that I had told him that I loved him." She pounded her fist on the table.

The doctor breathed, knowing that this wasn't over yet. "I-"

"The worst part is he didn't say anything back. I mean, he might've said 'thank you', but I'm not sure he did. As a doctor, you would say I am clinically insane, right?"

She sighed and crossed her arms, a sign that she had finally finished.

Sid unclipped his glasses and attached them together so they rested on his scrubs. "Listen, Kelly, you can't use me to get out of work with a diagnosis." He chuckled at her antics. It reminded him of a time in his youth, but he didn't have the time to go into that.

Kelly groaned. "I'm not trying to get out of work. I just wanna be able to tell this guy that I wasn't in my right mind when I said it."

"Do you want my advice?"

"Why else would I be here? I don't exactly come here for the smell of whatever's in that locker over there," she rolled her eyes.

He moved to hand her the sponge he was using. "Clean the table." She grabbed a pair of gloves and started working on the table.

"How is this advice?"

Sid laughed for a while at her response. She groaned and continued to scrub the table.

"Cultivate your garden."

She sighed and scrubbed harder. "I know that's from a book, but what book?" The table was practically spotless by now, ready for another patient.

She heard the snapping of his glasses as he returned them to his nose. "It's Candide. It means to just deal with your own problems."

"That's what I am doing!"

"I know, but I've been waiting for three years to tell you this. But you need to deal with this problem yourself. Talking to me about it won't make it go away."

She sighed loudly. "I hate that you're right." She made her hand into a fist and hit the table. A small echo resounded from the metallic surface into the silence that surrounded them.

He raised an eyebrow. "So what will you do, Detective."

"I was thinking that I'd just avoid him till it affects work. It's the Higgins way."

"From what I've heard, there is no Higgins way."

"Who'd ya hear that from?"

"Danny."

"Well, he lies. It's the Messer way." She grinned. "Actually, the Messer way is to cheat and then lie about it." Kelly laughed loudly at her own joke. Sid debated whether to roll his eyes or not.

He countered, "How do you know this?"

"He doesn't take break ups well," she told him, handing him the sponge. He took it gingerly and smiled.

"I take it that you're good on the advice."

She gave him a thumbs-up and turned to leave. As she walked out, she stopped when she heard the elevator ding. Out strolled Hawkes, pretending to look at his watch as if he was in a rush.

He nearly walked past her. Nearly. "Oh, Kells, I almost missed you."

She hesitated to roll her eyes. "I'm sure, Sheldon."

"We need to talk."

"I knew you didn't come down here for Siddie over there," she smiled. "But you might want to visit him. I think he's getting kinda lonely down here, Doc."

He resisted the urge to smile at her joke. "Stairs?"

"Well, the elevator's faster. It's kinda why they invented it."

"Let's take the stairs."

This was going to be a long talk. They both knew this.

The stairwell echoed with his voice as he finally broke the silence. "I need to say something."

"If it's 'I love you too', I won't believe you," she crossed her arms in annoyance.

"That's not it."

Her face fell. "Oh."

Sheldon leaned back against the stairwell's railing before continuing. "What you said last night – it really confused me. I just think-" he cleared his throat "-I just think that we should take a small break."

Her hand covered her mouth before she had time to think.

"Not indefinitely, but until Thanksgiving. We just need to think before we make rash decisions."

"Thanksgiving's three weeks away, Doc!" Don't you think you're being paranoid? Sure, I said I loved you, but this, this is crazy! She wanted to scream her thoughts so desperately, but her mouth seemed bent on trying to hide the annoyance with what he was doing. "Look, I'm sorry I blurted that out last night. It was obviously a mistake. Can't we just – I dunno – pretend this never happened?"

He sighed. "We are both too smart to know that it meant nothing. It'd be hard if we were together."

She nodded. "You mean you don't wanna hurt my feelings because you won't say it back."

Silence.

"Fine, we'll be friends, Doc. We can be friends, right?"

He missed the sarcasm.

"Always."

Hawkes casually flipped through a case file at the break room table as he ate his lunch.

"You know, that this is the break room? You're allowed to take a break from work, buddy." He recognized that voice. Was he really surprised that she was calling him buddy?

Kelly sat across the table from him with the New York Times in hand. She was doing the crossword puzzle in pencil, looking up every minute or so to look at him.

"You know, Doc, I can't figure this one out."

He nodded as a sign for her to go on.

She grinned. "Okay it's a seven letter phrase for "I want to apologize for being a tool today". Oh, and it starts with "I" then "M" then "S"."

"I wasn't being a tool," he answered quietly.

She laughed. "I'm sorry, too many letters! Guess again."

The chair screeched across the floor as he stood up and walked to the fridge. "I'm not playing this game with you, Kells."

"Oh, be a sport. It was your decision after all."

"Did the words "be a sport" just come out of your mouth?" A new voice entered the conversation followed by a snicker from a blonde detective.

Kelly rolled her eyes. "Shut up, Ducky!"

Danny snickered again. "Ducky?"

"Well, you know how he's Donald so like Donald Duck, but that's too much of a mouthful so it's just Ducky."

Flack crossed his arms over his chest. "Now that you two are done laughing, do you want to go to Sullivan's after shift? Kells, there's this guy we want you to meet." Hawkes perked up. "His name's Casey."

"Like Casey at the Bat or KC and the Sunshine Band?" She asked loudly, knowing that Sheldon was listening from where he stood by the fridge.

Don ignored her question and kept talking. "So what do you say? I mean, we know you aren't in a relationship because who would date you?" He joked.

"That's the way to get me to agree," she laughed. "But I don't think I should." She watched as Hawkes clenched the handle to the fridge.

He shook his head as he opened the door and found the container he had his lunch in. Snapping it open, he put the rest of his stew into the Tupperware and put it back in the fridge to get after shift.

Danny sighed. "C'mon, Kells, you gotta do this."

"I don't really-"

"Kells," Danny started, about to beg. "I promised him I'd introduce you to him."

"Fine!"

"Awesome. He'll be at Sullivan's so I guess we'll see you then." Flack walked out of the room with Danny dogging at his heels.

Silence enveloped the room before Hawkes voiced his concerned.

"You're going out with this Casey guy?"

"You have a problem with it?"

"No, I've just seen bullets leave guns slower," he shook his head. "It's been what? Three hours?"

She laughed. "Well, I'm not exactly taken for Thanksgiving, am I? Plus, I have a life besides you so take all the time you need. I'll be waiting."

"So what are you going to be doing with this Casey?"

"I was thinking we might do a little dance. You know, make a little love," she grinned. "But all together we'll just get down tonight."

"Funny."

"Well, I think he'll just strike out. I only have feelings for one guy even if he doesn't feel the same way."

Hawkes drummed his fingers on the tabletop. "Can we stop talking about me as if I'm not here?"

Kelly smiled and shrugged. "I don't know. Can you ignore the fact that I may or may not have told you that I love you?"

A strange cough came from his mouth as he sat down next to her. She ignored this.

"Plus, I've told Danny and Flack that I love them."

"That's not the same. Don't pretend it is."

She gave up. "Fine, I'm givin' up here. I accept that this just won't happen. Now if you would excuse me, I need to eat lunch and get back to work."

Sullivan's was packed that night. It was full of all types and walks of people in it just getting off of work. Drinks lined the bar itself as the three of them walked in.

"I don't think I can go through with this," Kelly said finally, a growing feeling of guilt entering her voice. She rubbed her shoulder out of awkwardness.

Danny grinned. "Oh, you'll do fine."

"No, I mean, I'm being a bit- well, I'm being an awful person. I'm dating someone, and I'm going on a date with someone else."

"You're dating someone?"

She crossed her arms over her chest and glared. "How don't you know that I've been dating someone? It's your job to be all up in other people's business!"

"I've been busy."

She sighed and kept walking. "I'll meet this guy, but I'm not going to date him. I feel bad enough already."

Flack groaned. He had a feeling that she wanted to talk about this or they should at least listen. "I feel a story coming on."

She shook her head because an audible answer would have been lost in the deafening noise. They walked further into the bar to the pool table where no one had set up shop. They were surprised, but who were they to complain about that. Pool cues were taken out and the balls racked.

Danny looked at his watch. It was already ten o'clock. "Where's Casey, Flack?"

"Dunno," he answered, breaking the balls. "He should be."

"I don't think I can go through with this," Kelly wrung the cue nervously. The guys ignored her.

Someone just a few inches shorter than Flack walked up to the three of them. He had dirty blonde hair that looked as if he ran his hand through it too much. He wore a striped Oxford style shirt that looked neatly pressed.

His voice sounded gravely and harsh when he finally spoke. "Sorry, I'm late, guys. The ER was packed. I'm on call though so sorry if this gets cut short." He looked over at Kelly who looked up as she lined up a shot. "You must be Kelly. I'm Casey. It's nice to finally meet you." He flashed her an award-winning smile.

"Sure you don't wanna go through with this?" Danny whispered to her.

"Well, one drink won't hurt."

A/N: I hope you liked this. Please review. I want to know your thoughts on this. Have a brilliant day.