Here we go again, another chapter.
I know this one is a little shorter but it's all I wanted it to be so I'm pretty happy about that.
Xena and Gabrielle mean the world to me their story, their love it inspires me and I hope I can make them justice with this.
Once again I've been blessed with an amazing beta who is also the one who keeps encouraging me to keep writing even when I'm 99% sure I suck at it. So mermaidrina, my pookie thank you for being the one who believes in me.
At last (I know long notes are boring as heck and I'm so sorry) I decided to start every chapter with a quote by our fandom's second favorite writer, Sappho.
Read, review and above all enjoy.
"Once again love drives me on, that loosener of limbs, bittersweet creature against which nothing can be done." : Sappho
Everything about those scrolls sounded so innocent and simple a childish vision of a non-existent perfection, an impossible notion of greater good, of right and wrong. Who would have thought that someday right and wrong would be so completely intertwined inside her, the pure Gabrielle, the virtuous Gabrielle, the torn Gabrielle, the maimed Gabrielle.
Reading about the greater good in her scrolls was leaving a bitter taste in her mouth. For so many years she had read and written about this greater good as if she had it all figured out and yet when it came to choosing between Xena and the greater good the clear line she had drawn between right and wrong turned immediately into a fading blur.
There was no wrong or right when it came to protecting Xena. She had tried once following a strict path of righteousness and failed miserably the moment Xena's body fell onto the sand of the arena. She remembered the moment clearly, her vision becoming hazy only returning to normal once the sand was painted in roman red, her body acting out of instinct or out of love, however one prefers to call it. That moment came to her mind often and yet she couldn't bring herself to feel guilty about any of the blood shed that day and the realization scared her beyond words.
"One hundred dinars for your thoughts..."
Gabrielle closed the scroll she was reading and returned it to her bag "you would be wasting your money, my thoughts are not that valuable".
"Gabrielle, everything about you is priceless to me" Xena stated as if it was just another scientific fact like how fire is unavoidably and unmistakably hot.
The bard's eyes were focused on the fire before her, looking at Xena's fading form had become too painful, it was like losing the warrior all over again.
"So what was on your mind?" Xena asked breaking the silence once more.
"I was thinking about our adventures" the bard answered vaguely still lost in her own thoughts.
"Any in particular?"
"No"
Xena sighed sitting beside Gabrielle her hand on her leg "I've known you for too long to have you lying to me Gabrielle, you know there is nothing you can't tell me right?"
"I am not lying Xena" her voice came out a bit too harsh "I'm just tired, traveling back from Chin wore me out" when she finally looked towards Xena's form the warrior was staring right back at her with such intensity that the bard felt herself shrinking a few inches.
"I'm just tired Xena, I promise" Gabrielle got up and walked back to her improvised bed "I just need to rest a little longer"
Xena knew there was nothing she could do for Gabrielle in that moment, she could see the pain in those sea green eyes, she could feel the sorrow behind her every word and her inability to help her bard was terrifying.
"You know that I love you right?"
"I do Xena..."
"Sleep well Gabrielle" the warrior's voice came out as a whisper and went unheard by Gabrielle who quickly gave in to exhaustion and fell back to sleep.
"A long time ago I prayed to whomever is out there to never let the light in her die, I'm not sure if anyone out there heard me but I'm here again, praying to some god out there to protect her, please" Xena was having a hard time getting her voice out she never asked for anything in her life, everything in her life had been fought for not prayed for and yet there she was, dead but on her knees looking up at the night sky praying that someone out there could do what she was no longer capable of, protecting the one who had always held her heart.
"I can see the light getting weaker in her, I can see the same pain I felt once taking over her eyes. I'm asking you, no, I'm begging you to help her, to save her. If she loses herself everything good we've done in this world will mean nothing." the warrior's eyes traveled from the night sky to Gabrielle's sleeping body "this world doesn't need me anymore but it needs her. It took me a while to realize that the world can't be saved by my sword, it can only be saved by the hope she inexplicably brings to every heart she touches along her way".
Looking again at the night sky the warrior princess begged once more with all the love in her heart.
"Please".