Antonio had lost a bet. He was always pushed into making stupid bets that he would never win and he now had to talk to the grumpy looking Slytherin sitting at the table in front of him.
"Uh, hola…" Antonio cast a worried glance back towards his laughing friends, then looked back to the reading boy in front of him, "You're one of the Vargas' twins, si?"
"We're not twins, idiota," The boy flipped the page and responded without taking his eyes off his book, "We're two years apart and we don't even look alike."
"Yeah," Antonio laughed nervously, still holding on to a sliver of hope that this Vargas was going to suddenly start being nice and "ve"ing, even if he knew that was impossible since the nicer Vargas was a Ravenclaw (he remembered because everyone thought the poor kid was sorted into the wrong house, he wasn't exactly the brightest crayon in the box), but nonetheless he asked, "Which one are you?"
"Do I look like a happy-go-lucky ditz? Is there a stupid potato sucker doting after me?" He rolled his eyes, "I'm Lovino."
"Well, Lovi, I-"
"Hold the fuck up, bastard," Lovino looked up to glare at him with the most breathtaking pair of hazel eyes that Antonio had ever seen, his cheeks flushed red and puffed out in annoyance. "First of all, the name's Lovino. L-O-V-I-N-O, three goddamn syllables, not that fucking hard. And secondly, judging by tweedle dumb and tweedle dumber laughing their asses off over there, I'd say that this was about some dare or some shit, so hurry the fuck up because, in case you couldn't see, I'm trying to read."
"Oh, well, I had to ask a Slytherin for their tie, so…"
Lovino sighed and quickly pulled off his tie, throwing it at Antonio, "Clean it before you return it. And if it gets stained, I will burn your skin off, pull out your intestines, and use them to choke you, capisce?"
"But wait, you'll get in trouble if you don't have a tie! Take mine, okay?"
Lovino's face flushed even more as Antonio offered him the tie, and he begrudgingly took it, "You're really stupid. I could've just gone back to the dungeon and got another one. Idiot."
"Yeah, but I think you look really cute in red~"
And with a wink, Antonio headed back towards his friends as Lovino stood shocked, his face continuing to redden to a lovely shade of fire truck red. "Ch-che cazzo… I'm not cute, bastardo! Ma' va te ne a fanculo e ai all'inferno, figlio di troia!"
It was obviously a great start to a relationship.
Ugh I hate the ending. Regardless, I think this turned out pretty well for my third spamano one-shot~
Translations:
Che cazzo: What the fuck
Ma' ve te ne a fanculo e ai all'inferno, figilo di troia: Fuck off and go to hell, son of a bitch