Time for round two folks. I didn't know this story would be so popular with everyone. See, reviews make me update faster.

Now, before I begin, I'd like to acknowledge something. Right now, there is another Negima / Nanoha story on the site. One with a near identical plot set up. Its caled Overlords and Overkill by Shadow Crystal Mage. Now if anyone is following this genera, then they'll know ALL about that fic and about Mage as well. Well, let me save you the trouble of flaming me: Mage knows all about this story, about this plot, and about the borrowed elements. Hell, he beta'd a section of it for me. I have his green light to write this as I please. If you don't believe me, ask him yourself. I've got the story in my favorites, as well as Mage.

Just lettin' ya all know

The heiress to the Bannings vast software company stirred in her sleep, muttering things in her dreams. A gentle knock on her door made her entire body flinch.

"Ojou-sama," a young woman at the door greeted. "It is time to wake up." After a few more restless movements, Alyssa Bannings yawned and sat up in bed.

"Oh, good morning Kiyone-san." Alyssa greeted, arching her back with another jaw-cracking yawn.

"The weather looks like it will hold for the rest of the day."

"That's good," Alyssa agreed, stepping out of the bathroom and slipping into her freshly ironed school uniform. "Fate's still afraid of thunderstorms, so she won't be having a meltdown tonight at the sleepover."

"A night bag has been prepared for you. I'll have Tenchi-san drive it over to the pastry shop after school."

"Thank him for me." Alyssa replied, stopping in front of a mirror to fix her hair.

Kiyone followed her mistress down from her room and into the breakfast nook just off the kitchen. While it was a 'breakfast' nook, the Bannings family took almost all of their private meals in there. They saved the expansive dining room table and its +20 seating capacity for social affairs. "Here's your breakfast," the head cook, Sasami, deposited a light continental breakfast in front of her. Unlike many other families in their neck of the woods, Alyssa's father had been an original programmer from Silicon Valley back in the 70's. After hitting it big with Microsoft, he jumped ship, moved to Japan, and the rest was history. Even after meeting her mother and setting down roots in Uminari City, he could never get used to Japanese food. So a good portion of the meals served in the house were of western flavor.

"Excuse me, ojou-sama," Ayeka, head of the Bannings' maid staff, approached the table. "I have just been informed of a rather nasty occurrence last night." The head maid handed her charge a printout from a local news website. "It appears that two young women were assaulted last night by, something," Alyssa could detect a nervous hitch in her voice. "They kept on rambling about a, darkness, and seemed to be having a fit. They weren't robbed, and there was no evidence of physical assault, but it's the fifth case like that since the new year began."

Alyssa frowned, half an English muffin hanging out of her mouth. Her mother had probably left her computer on all night. Again. Still, this was serious. It had gotten to the point where Kyouya, Zafira, and Arf were taking turns escorting the five of them everywhere they weren't chauffeured.

"Your mother requested that I ask you to reconsider tonight sleepover at the Takamachi household."

"Like hell I'm gonna do that," Alyssa quickly replied. "We've been planning this sleepover for two weeks, ever since Hayate got back from that foreign hospital."

Which was a lie. She had really gotten back from Mid-Childa and her appearance in court. Thankfully cooler heads had prevailed, and her and her knights got off on a technicality. Granted they were all on probation, but that was easy compared to the prospect of imprisonment. Ayeaka sighed and bowed.

"I will have your mother contact the Takamachi family this afternoon in order to confirm that you will be protected."

"That woman worries too damn much," Alyssa sighed, pushing her now empty plate away from her. "We're either gonna be in the pastry shop or at Nanoha's house."

"I will be sure to tell her that."

"Thank you Ayeka-san." Alyssa said, accepting her school bag from Kiyone. Just as she was about to set foot out the door, a loud screech followed by a thick sucking noise wailed in from upstairs.

"Can someone tell me why Mihoshi-san is trying to use the vacuum again?"

"I think she was trying to use it to clean up after the dogs." Ayeka suggested.

"Please see that she doesn't set my room on fire. Again."

Ayeka bowed respectfully. "I will see to it personally."

Kiyone escorted Alyssa outside to the front gate. "Will Tsukimura-san be picking you up today?" Her maid asked.

"Of course, it is Friday." Ever since Hayate had joined them, the quintet of girls had begun to work like clockwork. Some days Alyssa and Suzuka would walk to school with Hayate, Fate and Nanoha, while other times they would ride with each other. The main reason for this was to ensure that no one traveled to or from school alone. Things worked out best that way.

It wasn't long before Suzuka's town car pulled up in front of the gate. "I'll see you tomorrow Kiyone-san." Alyssa announced, climbing into the open car. Kiyone simply bowed in respect before turning back to the house. Alyssa pulled the car door shut and settled into the leather interior.

"TGIF." She announced, stretching her back some more.

"What does that mean?" Suzuka asked.

"Thank God it's Friday. It's an American saying."

"Well, I guess that makes sense, considering your father."

"Still, as far as Americans go, dad says he prefers to stay away from New York."

"What's wrong with New York?" Alyssa turned and locked eyes with her.

"Weirdoes." She replied, looking at Suzuka with a serious glint in her eye.

The two friends' talk soon turned to school. "So what do you think of our new teacher?" Suzuka asked.

"What I wanna know is what kinda ponzy scheme are they trying to pull? I mean, he's our age! How much can he friggen teach us?"

"You'll have to find out Alyssa-chan." Suzuka replied, a hint of laughter in her voice.

"I swear, if he starts on that 'holier than thou' routine, I'm gonna pop him one in the lip."

"Or you could ask Nanoha to make friends with him."

The two girls paused, then burst out laughing. "Oh god, there wouldn't be a smudge left!" Alyssa laughed, tears forming in her eyes.

"That might be a bit too cruel." Suzuka agreed.

()()()

Their first English Literature class with Negi Springfield was interesting, to say the least. He spent the first few minutes talking about how they would be studying the works, along with what they would be studying. After a quick Q & A session, he passed out a copy of a bunch of poems from British and American authors. Considering that her father kept an expansive collection of western works in the house, Alyssa was very familiar with the works of Edger Allen Poe and Robert Frost. However, the class's discussion of "The Road Less Traveled By" was hilarious. Especially once Nanoha started defending the feeling of the road the traveler had passed up. Sometimes, that girl was thicker than a brick.

Several classes and a handful of daydreams later, Alyssa was grinning to herself as the last bell chimed for the day. Now they'd have the whole weekend to goof around. It was good to be her.

"Now remember to all get home safely," Negi announced. "Oh, and before I forget, Takamachi-san, Harlaown-san, may I speak with you before you leave."

"Busted." Alyssa hissed as Nanoha stood up. The brunette flinched at her comment, nearly tripping over her bag in the process.

"We'll wait for you outside Nanoha-chan." Hayate told her as Suzuka began wheeling her out of the room.

The three friends assembled outside the classroom door, eagerly waiting to see what fate befell their companions. "Why would sensei need to see Nanoha and Fate on the second day of class?" Suzuka asked.

"How should I know?" Alyssa sighed, leaning against the wall.

"It does seem kind of odd though," Hayate remarked. "Weird things happening like this, a strange new teacher, and all of the attacks that have been happening." An awkward silence fell upon the group. "We're in an anime!" The wheelchair-bound girl excitedly announced.

Suzuka gently thumped Hayate's head with her school bag. "I think it's a bit more complicated than that Hayate-chan."

"Besides, what kind of stupid plot would this be, anyway," Alyssa commented. "No self-respecting author would willingly publish something as retarted as a ten-year-old boy teaching English in Japan."

(Somewhere in a sea of infinite dimensions, a man seated at his desk sneezed, sending ink all over the page he was illustrating, prompting him to delay the release of that current chapter by another month.)

Their conversation was forestalled by the sound of the classroom door opening. "So I will speak to your parents tonight Takamachi-san. And I'm sure Lindy-san won't mind me tutoring you either Harlaown-san." Both girls blushed profusely at the thought of a parent-teacher conference so early in the year.

"Well, I'm sure you can stop by my parent's pastry shop this afternoon. We were on our way there."

"That sounds like a good idea." Negi agreed.

Just as the six of them were leaving, Alyssa swept her hand along the wall as she pushed herself onto her feet. This had the side effect of disturbing some dust the janitors had missed. Just as Negi walked past. Murphy reared his ugly head as that very dust made its way up Negi's nose. Flashbacks from his first day at Mahora appeared in his mind just as he cocked his head back to sneeze. However, the skirts the girls were wearing hung well below their knees, so they weren't blown up by the massive wind he kicked up. Consequentially, Negi was thrown backward by the backlash caused by his premature release of magic.

The five girls watched in awe as their teacher pulled himself into a tumble, flipping gracefully through the air. As he approached the ground, he braced himself for a gentle landing. Unfortunately, Murphy was not done here yet. What Negi failed to take into account was the 'Wet Floor' sign right next to him. His foot hit an exceptionally wet patch of polished granite floor.

"Bwaa!" Negi cried, milliseconds before he face planted onto the floor. Alyssa, Suzuka and Hayate held back as Nanoha and Fate rushed forward to help their teacher.

"Shouldn't we do something?" Suzuka asked as Hayate stared on in fascination.

"Actually, I kinda wanna see what happens next." Alyssa replied.

()()()

Alyssa sighed to herself as she helped wheel Hayate's chair out of the main building. Nanoha, Fate and Negi-sensei were a little a ways behind them. Nanoha had insisted he stop off in the infirmary to ensure he didn't have a concussion or a skull fracture or an aneurism. Hayate made a note to have Shamal talk with Nanoha about the conditions of all of those injuries. Suzuka and Alyssa both nodded in agreement.

Finally they made it outside, about twenty minutes late. There, stood a tall woman with piercing eyes and neon-pink hair holding the leash of what only could be described as a wolf.

"Zafira-kun!" Hayate shouted as the 'wolf' somehow slipped off his leash and bound towards the girl. Anyone else would have been scared witless seeing a four-foot beast run at them. However, Hayate giggled as her guardian beast gently put his front paws down on her lap so he could reach out and lick her cheek. Alyssa couldn't help but smile to herself as she watched the exchange. She knew from experience that more often than not, it was the bigger dogs who were the most friendly. She made a mental note that, next time she was home, she'd give her Newfoundland 'Nana' a great big hug.

"Don't worry sensei," Alyssa could hear the three of them approaching. "My family's shop into too far away."

"It won't be a bother," she heard her sensei reply. "I'm just worried about bothering them during business – hrk"

Negi was cut off as soon as he walked out the door. Zafira had climbed down off of Hayate and took up a position right outside of the door. This put him directly at eye level with Negi as soon as he walked outside. The child teacher was frozen in his tracks, his eyes wide with panic.

Of course, Zafira was supposed to be playing the 'kind big dog' gambit. So thankfully, there would be no bloodbath. Not that Alyssa would be expecting one. But it was nice to have the assurance. She could barley hold in her laughter as Zafira stood up on his hind paws, placed both of his front paws on Negi's shoulders, and forced him down onto his back. Before the red-haired child could so much as cry in alarm, Zafira was already licking his face silly. Alyssa had to grab onto Hayate's chair for support as she collapsed into a fit of giggles. It was even funnier when, to spite his feeble attempts to push him off, Zafira went and sat on his legs.

"I think you've cleaned his face enough Zachariah-kun." Signum had finally decided to step in and clipped Zafira, or Zacky-kun's leash back onto his collar. Like an obedient dog, Zafira immediately got off Negi and sat down directly beside Signum. Nanoha and Fate managed to curtail their laughter enough that they were able to help their poor teacher up off the ground. "So you're the child teacher I've heard so much about." Signum stood over Negi, glaring down at him from above. For a moment, Negi quaked under Signum's piercing gaze. However, he seemed to gather his composure and stared back up at her. "Yes, I am Negi Springfield."

Signum smirked before extending a hand. "Signum Yagami," she replied. "And I believe you have already met Zachariah-kun." Zafira barked once in reply, eliciting a small jump in surprise. "You must be Hayate-san's mother." Negi reasoned, shaking Signum's hand. "Adopted technically," the pink-haired knight corrected. "However, that is only a small technicality. Family is family, after all." Alyssa did not miss the misty eyed look Hayate now had. Nor did she miss the tear the girl had covertly wiped away.

()()()

Hayate Yagami was the happiest when she was with her friends. The four girls she now hung around with, Nanoha, Fate, Alyssa, and Suzuka, were a godsend. They were second in her heart only to the four knights who appeared to her one day. As such, her heart was practically overflowing during those times when everyone was gathered around. Granted Shamal and Vita were missing, but they were with them in spirit.

"I still think something's up with that guy." Alyssa muttered into her glass of milk. The five girls, plus Signum and Zafira were seated at a back table in a corner of the Takamachi's bakery / coffee shop. Negi was currently in the back, having a conversation with Nanoha's parents. Of course, said conversation didn't begin until Signum pried Negi's head out of Momoko's cleavage. Hayate still giggled as offers of adoption and marriage to Nanoha filtered in from the back room.

"Seriously," the heiress insisted. "Not only is he a ten-year-old teacher, he friggen ninja-backflips after he sneezed himself into the air."

"Signum-san," Suzuka began. "What do you think?"

She paused to stir her tea before answering. "He has a surprisingly strong grip for someone his age," Signum answered. "And that scar on his cheek is a battle wound."

"So he is some sort of crazy kung-fu master!" Alyssa shouted in response.

"Zafira-kun," Hayate inclined to her Guardian Beast over their mental link. "What do you think?"

"He is not like other children I have met on this planet," he answered, not even lifting his head off the floor. "He tasted of power, but I can't place its origin. It's unlike anything I've ever felt."

Hayate carefully related this information out to the girls at the table. "So we have a child teacher who knows kung-fu and is somehow powerful enough to trigger Zafira-san's senses." Fate summarized, resting her chin in her hand.

"Don't forget Kamo-kun." Nanoha announced.

"That's right," Hayate agreed. "I don't want to act suspicious or anything, but he did seem fairly well trained."

"And he's living next door to Fate-chan." Nanoha announced.

Fate flinched as she took a forkful of cake up to her mouth. "Arf-san didn't say anything about him last night, so I assumed he was just a normal teacher."

"Who happens to be ten years old." Alyssa added.

"Why is his age such an important issue?" Signum asked.

"Because it's not normal!" Alyssa shouted, upsetting her glass of milk.

"You munchkins need to keep it down to a dull roar." Kyouya asked as he came over with a clean rag and a tray of cake.

"Sorry onii-san." Nanoha apologized.

"Just remember that we have more people here besides you guys." He told them as he began to serve them another round of desserts. "Oh and by the way, I think that kid teacher of yours is done talking with mom and dad."

Nanoha and the others looked up to see Negi leaving the back room, followed closely by Nanoha's parents. Her mother, much to her embarrassment, was still crooning over Negi like he was a lost puppy.

"Nanoha-chan," her father called over. "Come here please." Nanoha marched over to her parents will all the emotion of a prisoner being led to the gallows. "We've spoken with Negi-sensei here," her father began. "He is rather worried about your grades from the fall."

"I'm sorry." Nanoha apologized, bowing with respect. With all of the fights with the Wolkenritter, she had little time to concentrate on her studies.

Her father nodded in approval. "Your teacher has volunteered to tutor both you and Fate-chan after school."

"I did it before for my old students," Negi announced. "And they really showed some significant improvement."

"Negi-kun agreed to come over to the house Sunday afternoon to tutor you," her mother gleefully told her while rubbing Negi's hair. "Wasn't that nice of him?"

Nanoha opted not to answer. Even with her limited knowledge of 'the adult world,' something told her that what her mother was doing right now was illegal.

"Well, I'm glad that I was able to sort that out," Negi announced as he managed to extricate himself from Momoko's cleavage / death grip. "I really should be getting home soon."

"Perhaps I should escort you sensei," Signum offered, standing up. "The streets are dangerous for the unprotected while this terror is about, and we were just about to leave."

"We?" Negi asked. Zafira took that as his cue to crawl out from underneath the table, making Negi jump in surprise.

"Don't worry sensei, I have never had a subject die under my watch." Hayate doubled over in silent laughter as she saw Negi's face turn white. Signum picked him up by the armpits and placed him on Zafira's back. "I will pick up Hayate around noon tomorrow." She announced as she led Zafira and Negi out of the shop.

"I've got such a bad feeling about this." Alyssa sighed.

In my fic, everyone carries the 'Butt Monkey Ball' Everyone will have their time to shine in the main plot, as well as get kicked in the mud for shits and giggles. I don't discriminate.

Oh, and anyone who doesn't know who Alyssa's servants are should never call themselves an Otaku