CHAPTER TWO

DINNER WITH EMILY

AND

THE TRAIN

After Sadie got me dressed into my dinner frock, I sat at my desk. I wrote in my diary about Emily. I truly felt sorry for her; for we were her true family and that everything that she had known was not the truth. I heard the door open and in walked Emily. She walked over to my bed and sat upon it. I let her sit down. She began to talk to me.

"Rose, can I ask you something?" She asked.

"Sure, you can ask me anything." I replied.

"Is mummy nice? I mean is she always like how she was earlier?" She asked me.

"Yes Emily. Mother is one of the nicest people you could ever meet. I'm lucky to have her as my mother. Elizabeth thinks that both mother and papa are perfect." I replied.

"Perfect? I thought nobody was perfect." She said.

"It's true that nobody is perfect. Elizabeth just thinks differently, that's all. She can be strange, but that makes me love her more. In this household we're taught to love one another." I said.

"Does she like to be called 'mummy'? I hope she isn't offended. If she is, I'll stop." Emily said. I simply shook my head.

"No, she doesn't mind. Actually I think she likes it that you call her mummy. She loves you." I said.

"Do you like me Rose?" Emily asked.

This was a hard question to answer. I hadn't really known Emily at all. She seemed nice and caring, but could she turn into a monster? I really hoped she didn't turn into one. Emily seemed fragile and delicate. Maybe Emily just needed time to get adjusted. Emily turned her head and I saw that she was wearing a very large bow in her hair.

"How large are your ribbons and bows Emily? That one is quite large. Mine are all small." I asked.

"They're all pretty large. Mama makes sure they're large so that I'm easily identifiable when I go into town." She said.

"You're allowed to go into town by yourself? You're lucky. I have to take my friends or go with Miss Sadie." I said.

"Brattleboro is a quiet town. Sure, there are the girls who go to Brattleboro Girls School. Those girls are stuck up and priggish. One of them got into a fight with me once. It was when I was ten, so two years ago. I was walking down State Street and there was a column of them walking, being led by their teacher. One of the girls made a snowball and threw it at me. It hit me in the face. The other girls laughed and giggled. I carefully rounded a corner, sat down and cried." Emily said.

"Oh Emily, that's mean of them. Why would anyone want to hurt you? Does your 'mother' hurt you?" I asked.

"Oh no, mama would never hurt me. She does sometimes swat me on the behind, but she rarely ever does. No, she loves me very much." Emily replied.

We both got up from our seats and walked out the door together. Emily was wearing a cream colored dress. She smiled and whispered

"I do hope mummy finds this dress to be nice."

I simply nodded. Mother would indeed find it nice. As Emily opened her mouth, I noticed that she had dental braces. I didn't say anything to her about them, for one of my friends had them. We walked down the stairs and into the dining room. The others were already in there. I expected them to get irate with us, but they didn't. Papa began to speak.

"So Emily, do you like your surroundings?" He asked.

"Yes. You have a nice home. I guess you are my true father. I never thought I'd be the daughter of a very powerful man." She said.

"Emily, Mr. Bukater and I are extremely grateful that you can rejoin us. We are now a complete family. I love the three of you. You're the greatest gift I could have ever received." Mother said.

Dinner was nearing completion. Elizabeth had since gone back to the nursery to go to bed, leaving Emily and I to sit with our parents. Mother became annoyed with something. Mother had this habit of being perfectly happy, but then as if someone dropped a coin; she'd turn annoyed and agitated.

"Rose, Emily would you please head upstairs? Your mother is having an episode." Papa said.

I was curious. I'd never really seen her do this before. I walked into Emily's room. The bed was turned down for her, and her nightdress was laid out. Suddenly, we heard footsteps and strangled sobbing. I opened the door and shouted after mother.

"Mother, what's going on? Are you all right? Please answer me." I choked out. She tried pushing me aside, but I wasn't going anywhere.

"Not now Rose. I need to be alone." She said through her sobs.

"No, no you're frightened. What are you frightened of? I've never seen you like this. It's scaring me." I said with concern. I walked into my parents' room. She sat on the bed and let out long, choked sobs. I turned away and shut the door. I heard her speak through the door.

"I can't tell them now. Oh God please help me." I continued to listen.

"Why did you have to get taken from me so soon? You could've been beautiful. You were beautiful. Your father always took you to his office to be doted upon by everyone. By the time we moved to that dreaded shithole you were getting sicker and sicker. Finally you died that day. You asked me for a glass of water. I went to get it for you, but when I returned you were dead. I blame myself for what happened. Please forgive me."

What was mother talking about? Suddenly I felt a hand grab me by the shoulder: it was papa.

"Go to the nursery little one. Your mother needs to cool off." He said.

"Why is she crying papa? Was it me?" I asked.

"Oh no, it wasn't you. Something happened a long time ago, and your mother feels guilty about it." He said.

"Was it Emily? Is she in trouble?" I asked.

"No. Rose. You go to the nursery. Sadie is waiting in there for you." He said in a sad tone.

I walked back to the nursery. Sure enough Miss Sadie was waiting for me.

"There you are. Please be quiet, Elizabeth is sleeping." Miss Sadie said.

"Can I ask you a question?" I said.

"Sure dear, you can ask me anything." She replied.

"What is mother guilty of? I mean she was in hysterics in her bedroom." I said.

"Oh Rose, you'll find out when you're older." She replied.

"But I'm twelve. Isn't that old enough?" I asked.

"No Rose. Your mother may act strict out in public, but here in the home, she's different. She may also have to run to the pharmacy soon." She replied.

I don't know what that meant, but it probably wasn't good. As I was changed into my nightdress, I was hoping mother would come down to tuck me and Elizabeth in for the night.

Sure enough, she came into the room like clockwork. Her emerald green eyes were swollen from the crying. Her cheeks were red and tear stained. Her hair was also down. I was amazed at how long it was.

"Rose, I'm sending you and Emily to your grandparents in Gregstown. I think that it would be for the best right now. You'll go to your grandparents, and then you'll go to Nantucket to stay with Mr. Creedon." Mother said.

I didn't want to leave here, I mean I love my grandparents; but what if mother needed me like I sometimes needed her? I couldn't just leave her. I didn't want to leave her.

"But what about you, aren't you coming with us? Please mother." I said, almost whining.

She looked at me and put her hand on my cheek.

"I'll only go for one night, but after that I must return. You'll both have fun." She said somberly.

She gave me a kiss and closed the door. I had difficulty sleeping. Down the hall, I could hear them argue. I could barely make out the words.

"Send them to see Peter? Ruth, you're crazy." Papa said.

"I am not! Peter loves the children. I am contacting him tomorrow, after I send Emily and Rose to Gregstown." Mother said.

"What if he says no? What will you do? Ruth please, you mustn't do this. If people catch wind of your problem…" Papa said tersely.

"Nantucket society has already labeled me a whore. You know how foolish they are! I cannot show my face there. I know Peter has forgiven me for what happened back in '89, but they sure haven't." Mother cried.

"Screw society. I mean I know I have a function to attend tomorrow night in Newport. I'll be staying at spring and Prospect Hill. You haven't told Emily the reason she was adopted have you?" Papa said.

"Of course I haven't told Emily. The children must be kept in the dark about everything until the time is right. As of right now, the time is not right. I'm worried about that child. She's twelve and she sleeps with a doll. The doll has a name of course; Madeline. She uses it for security. I saw the look in the child's face when she first saw me. She was truly frightened of me. I don't know why people are so afraid of me." Mother said.

"You must know every housewife in a thousand mile radius actually envies you. Magazine editors have written articles about you. You're obviously well received. Nantucket society doesn't call you a whore. They say that you have to have a lot of spunk to pull that off." Papa said, trying to comfort mother.

"I will accompany them to Gregstown. We're probably going to leave on the 11:30 train. I'll take a change of clothes for myself, as I'm staying overnight there. Mother will be happy to see Emily, as will father; that is if his condition isn't aggravated." Mother said.

"I assume you're talking about his C.F.D.? War will do that to a person." Papa asked.

"I remember when I was little, oh about four when he came home from the New England War. He was different. I remember him crying in the middle of the night." Mother replied.

I was now drifting off to sleep. I had a nightmare that night. I was in the park with Allison and I came home. The door was open and I walked into the house. There were bloody footprints and blood on the walls. I began to panic. I ran upstairs to the nursery, where in a pool of blood lay the body of Elizabeth. Her eyes had been gouged out. I then turned and ran to my parents' room. They lay there with all their organs taken out. I began to scream. I woke up screaming. The light came on in the hall, and the door opened. In walked mother and Miss Sadie. Mother was in her robe; Miss Sadie was in her nightdress.

"Rose, are you all right? What happened, did you have a scary dream?" Mother asked. I nodded yes. Tears were coming down my cheeks.

"I can interpret what it means Rose." Miss Sadie said.

"I didn't know you could interpret dreams?" Mother said to Miss Sadie. Mother looked intrigued.

"What was in the dream Rose?" Miss Sadie asked.

"Death, everyone was murdered." I said in a frightened tone.

"It simply means that you will possibly be criticized for bad manners. I have heard that you are going to see your grandparents in Gregstown. Is your grandmother critical of manners?" Miss Sadie asked.

"She can be. She's from England. They're all pompous over there." I said. Mother laughed, as did Miss Sadie.

"Rose, you just drift back off to sleep. We have to pack in the morning." Mother said almost in a whisper. Sure enough, my eyes were closed as soon as she was finished saying those words. It seemed like a few minutes later when I woke up to find it to be daylight. Elizabeth was already dressed and standing by my bed.

"Good morning, it's time to wake up." She said in a very, very happy voice.

"Go find mother and be with her." I said groggily.

"Hmph, I thought you liked mornings." Elizabeth cajoled.

"I'm leaving today to go to Gregstown." I said.

"But you can't do that! It's my tenth birthday. I won't get to celebrate with you?" Elizabeth solemnly said.

"Mother is insisting. I'm sure you'll have a nice birthday. Perhaps Miss Sadie can do something with you." I said, paying no attention to Elizabeth's pout.

"I want to go with you. Although I'll miss mama, and all the things we do in our alone time." She said.

"Grandmother doesn't like feeble children." I said.

"I am not feeble! I'm quite intelligent. You're the feeble one." She replied in anger.

"Elizabeth, you haven't mastered all of the basic functions. You know what I'm talking about." I said as she blushed.

"So!" Elizabeth exclaimed.

"Grandmother can't have that you know. She's from England. They hate everybody." I said.

I wish Elizabeth could get it. I often wondered what she and mother did during their alone time. If I were a betting girl, I'd say that it involved something with mother's body. Mother always wore a blouse with buttons on the front during their afternoon session. The fabric, while white was translucent enough to see that she wore a special kind of corset under it. This kind was for nursing. I have a theory that mother takes Elizabeth into the nursery and has her sit on her lap. She unbuttons the blouse, and unhooks her corset, allowing Elizabeth to suckle. I'm sure mother enjoys doing this with Elizabeth. Elizabeth seems so content when she goes for her nap.

Why didn't she ever do that with me? I mean am I supposed to be the master child? Papa loves me more anyways. They're so protective of me. They'd die if something did indeed happen to me, especially whilst at school. School, I hoped for the coming term to be pleasant. Emily was going to attend with me this year. Speaking of Emily, I wondered what she was doing at this very second.

I was dressed in a white frock with white stockings and my black Mary Jane shoes. I do not like to wear boots, because they make my feet hurt. Emily wore the same thing as me. Mother hailed a cab outside the house and we took it to the station. Once inside, we headed over to the ticket counter. Emily sighed.

"I was just here yesterday. I've ridden enough trains to last me a lifetime!"

"But Gregstown isn't Vermont. There's a ferry to Pownal, Vermont there, as it's on Lake Quanapowwitt." I said.

We headed to our platform. I was glad that we had checked our luggage through at the counter. The train was sitting there idling away. We were the first passengers to board, and it looked as though we would be the only passengers in the car we occupied. At 11:30 we rolled out of the station. I sat at the window and watched the scenery pass. We crossed the North River and into another part of the city. There were homes that looked stately in some areas, but in others some homes looked to be abandoned. Cambridge came next, and I saw massive crowds throughout. These were college students. The summer holidays must be fast approaching. As we turned west, the Peter River came into view. This year I'm going to be learning about the river and all of its tributaries.

The further west we got, the scenery changed. Finally, we entered Monkton County. Monkton County is the butt of many jokes. It isn't poor like they say it is, and if you know where to look you'll find large mansions there. Finally at 2:30, we arrived in Gregstown.

"This is what Gregstown looks like Rose?" Emily asked. Her straw hat blocked most of her view.

"Yes. Not quite like where we live, and certainly nothing like Brattleboro." I replied.

"Come girls, they've offloaded our luggage." Mother said as she took control of the situation. We walked over to where porters were unloading various pieces of luggage. I found my trunk (I had it engraved with my initials.) Next, Emily found hers. Mother only had a carpet bag with her. This bag was quite large (she probably had her nightclothes in it, as well as clothes for tomorrow when she returned.) We hailed a cab to take us to our grandparents' house. The homes we passed were quite stately.

Grandfather made his money in designing ships. The navy appointed him as a naval architect. He worked at a shipyard in Fall River where mother is from. From '70 to '74 he was in the army and then the army reserve. He fought in the New England War. He met papa during the New England years and they became friends. When mother married papa in 1890, he approved right off. Grandmother didn't really like papa at all. It could be his anti-Britain attitude. She didn't really understand Elizabeth. Once she told mother that Elizabeth would be better off in an institution. Mother balked at the idea. We pulled up in front of the house and got out of the cab. The driver helped us with our trunks. Mother rang the bell.

The door opened.

It was grandmother.

"Ruth, it's a delight to see you again. Hello Rose, and oh! You must be Emily!" She said.

"I haven't seen you since the day you were adopted. How have they treated you?" she asked.

"I have been treated very well, thank you." Emily replied.

We walked inside. To Emily, this was a new experience. The house was very large.

"John, Ruth and the children have arrived!" Grandmother cried out, hoping to get grandfather's attention. Sure enough, he came around the corner with a look of happiness in his eyes.

"It is nice to see you again Rose. Who is this who is with you?" He asked, motioning towards Emily.

"This is Emily. I just found out that she is my twin. Mother says that we're now a complete family again." I said as I hugged him.

"Good to see you Ruth. I trust that your trip out here was comfortable?" He asked.

"It was, the children were well behaved. I'd like to talk to you in private." Mother said.

With this, my grandparents and mother walked into the study and closed the door.