AN: Hi Guys! I'm so excited people are actually reading this or even just clicking on it. LOL I'm on the fence about the summary(FF only gives you 255 characters to write in that sucker!) Anyhoooo it has surprised the shizz out of me. So thank you!

Please remember this is AU and OOC. I love Logan, but I don't really know what went on in that pretty little head.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Gilmore Girls.

I found some things. I'll come by your apartment 8. Cool?
As soon as I received Mike's text my mind has been all over the place. Fuck that, if I was being honest, my mind has been going crazy for the past thirty-six hours since IT all went down. That's what I've dub the whole night,"IT".
IT will be the night that will forever change my life.
IT has me thinking about the past, of her, of us, the future...or what I hope will be our future.

Through it all I'm trying to keep my shit together for the outside world. But my nerves are shot. I know people can tell I am little off, but hopefully it's not enough to cause alarm. The last thing I need is my father on my ass cause I'm not getting shit done.

Fuck. I swear the nagging pain has intensified. The pain I usually can handle, but combine that with my thoughts and the nerves, I've been a mess. I've been throwing myself into work, ignoring all non work related calls, texts, e-mails, BBMs, and Skype calls. Colin and Finn have been relentless. But I couldn't talk to them, not yet. I know if I open up the communication to them they would try to make me talk. They'd want to know what exactly went down the other night or what I thought or analyze it down to last detail.
Fuck, I swear they were just as bad as Honor.
But fuck that, I'm not ready. I need to work this shit out on my own first. I need to see what Mike found. God, I hope it's good

At 7:40 after a day of dumb meetings, talking about dumb shit, looking over even dumber shit, I make my way home.
Well not really home Logan, it's never felt like home.
Whatever. Argh. Not now. Deep breath.

Standing in front of the entrance, Colin, Finn and I just stare at Robert as he pushed past us holding an arm protectively around Lucy. He offer us curt nods in greeting and Lucy directs a little wave my way but they don't stop to talk, they just walk right back into the Gallery.

"What the fuck was that?"
"Damn mates, since when did Robert get girls?"
Colin and Finn exclaimed at the same time. Both are staring at me with curious and expectant looks on their faces like I knew what the fuck was going on.

I took a deep breath, shrug my shoulders and walked to the street to hail a cab. "I don't fucking know, but I need to get the fuck home." I say over my shoulder to them. They were both still standing by the door staring at me. As a cab pulls to the curb, I turn to my friends "are you fuckers coming or are you going to take the train back into the city?" Their eyes pop wide open and they hop in the cab as fast they could go. I get in behind them chuckling and rolling my eyes. Of course not. No slumming it in the subway for them I guess.

After giving the cabbie the address to my apartment, I lean my head back on the head rest and close my eyes. My mind going a million miles a minute. I can hear Colin and Finn whispering to each other but I don't bother to ask or even try to engage them. I need to figure this shit out on my own first.

I know it was her in that car, I just know it, I could fucking feel it. The feeling of when she's close by. It was a relief and a shock to my body and mind, it's been so long. I've being craving that feeling, longing for it-. Argh, Logan stop it. Not down THAT road. Deep breath.

My mind switches to the little blond hair, blue eyed, bouncy boy. Landon. I gotta say he is freaking adorable. But of course she'd have an adorable kid, she's beautiful. Fuck. Stop. Not there either. Deep Breath.

Was that-? Fuck. Did that mean she didn't...? Fuck. Thank god, she didn't- Fucking shit fuck. What the fuck is the matter with you? NNOO! Stop! Deep breath.

Okay, when I get to the apartment, I have to call Mike and have him look into the license plate. Thank fucking god I have good memory. Maybe he can get a lead from there. Maybe the car service company will tell him who ordered the car.

God I hope so, I've spent the past five years looking for her and waiting, praying for her to come back but nothing. After waiting and my own attempts to find her failed I hired Mike, a retired NYPD detective turned private investigator. He came highly recommended, had a ton of connects and was very persuasive but nothing. He went to Paris, Doyle, Lane, the Yale administrators, but nothing. He went to that badonk town of hers but only got the cold shoulder, lies or when he went into the Diner he got thrown right out on his ass, literally. No one would give up anything or they couldn't get access to the information we needed. No one would take the bribes or the records were sealed tight. We kept our eyes and ears open to all facets gossip and news to any and everything on her, her mother, or even just the elder Gilmore's but nothing.
Nothing for fucking five years.
Not until now.

And of course it had to be an overly dramatic affair.
No, we couldn't run into each other at the grocery store or a restaurant, like normal people.
No of course not. Fuck.

Why the fuck didn't I think of Lucy? I thought they had a falling out after the bullshit with Marty?
And seriously Robert? Uncle Robert? What the fuck was up with that bullshit? FUCK!

"Good Evening, Mr. Logan," I look up to the smiling face of my doorman, Jules. "Hey Jules, how's it going?" I say, with a slight smile, even in my fuckery I can't help it; Jules was one of the happiest and nicest man I've ever met. "It's going good sir, its promises to be a gorgeous night, it might even snow!" His smile falls, I assume cause mine did first. Snow always reminded me of HER. Fuck. I need a drink. "Um, yeah snow. Well good night Jules." I hop onto the elevator not bothering to wait for a reply, I feel even more like a douche cause I hear him yell something to me through the closing door. But I quickly brush it off. I have too much other shit to worry about.

As the elevator goes up to my floor, I close my eyes and send a silent prayer that whatever Mike found is good.

Please god, let it be good.