Wow! Thanks for the feedback and the reviews! I really appreciate it and glad people realize that I'm not "hoping" any of this happens! I also want to clarify that while Sharon seems to hate Tampa now (haha), I have no ill will to the place. I like Tampa (and every other city mentioned) very much. Sharon's mess continues...
It was another three weeks before Sharon got home and an appointment with her longtime physician, Dr. Collins. Dr. Collins had delivered both Emily and Ricky, and she was just a bit older than Sharon. The two had hit it off instantly decades ago now and had remained friends throughout, so she was in complete surprise when Sharon showed up on her OB panel for the day.
Eyebrows raised, she entered the room with pursed lips looking at Sharon. Sharon closed her eyes and shook her head, "Don't start," Sharon sighed. "I've already have every reaction possible."
Dr. Collins nodded, and she began the exam without saying anything personal. Sharon knew she'd explain things to her, but she had to get through this first. Sharon sat in that office, tears running down her face through the whole thing. There was no denying it; she was visibly pregnant. She'd only managed to hide it from Rusty because when her plane had finally landed the night before, she'd had on her overcoat and all when Rusty and Gus picked her up. She'd held her purse close to her and silently thanked herself that Rusty wasn't a big hugger. The next morning, she told Rusty she wanted to get some sleep and had errands to run, with the promise they would meet for dinner. She had a lot to discuss with Rusty, with all her kids, but she needed to start with Rusty, the one who would certainly see the change.
"Well, Sharon," Dr. Collins spoke up, the first things she'd really said, "we'll go ahead and do an ultrasound. Based on just your appearance, I need to scold you for not getting in her soon. Your age alone is problematic, and there is a battery of tests we need to run to see if the little peanut is doing okay. You really needed to have been in here awhile ago, but at this point, reminding you of that isn't going to help. So, let's get the ultrasound going and see where you are. Do you know how many weeks you are now?"
Sharon shook her head and began the story, some of it, "No, I mean, it was most likely January, so whatever that means. I'm not sure. I guess I'm just glad I never did gain much weight with Ricky or Emily, and I am thin now to begin with," she shrugged.
Dr. Collins nodded, "Yes, I looked back at your notes, really I had to dust them off," she gave Sharon a glare, "but you're right. You never did gain much weight, but this is a whole different story. You're much older, and yes, as your doctor, I'm allowed to say that. Other factors can come into play too like the baby's father. I'm guessing it's not Jack?"
Sharon remained tight-lipped but shook her head, "No, it's not. He's not involved and won't be."
Dr. Collins gave Sharon a sympathetic look, "Sorry to hear that. This will be that much harder then, and you'll need to have a support system. I know your kids aren't living here anymore are they?
"Just Rusty," Sharon sighed, placing her hand on her stomach as they got her ready for the ultrasound, "and, he's in college, so I don't want this to be his problem. I'll deal with it."
"Okay, well, you think January, so let's take a look," she nodded, as she started to move the ultrasound around. "Hmm, well, what do you want to hear?"
Sharon sat halfway up, looking at the screen, "What do you mean?"
"Sharon, there's no mistaking it-it's twins. There are two babies in there, which might account for your obvious stomach already, but I'll have to do all the marker checks to see where you are. Sharon, this is even more serious. While at your age, it's rare, but at the same time, for your age, your body does weird stuff. Looks like when you thought it was menopause, it wasn't, and you've got two babies in there."
Sharon had a look of horror on her face, "Twins? You can't be serious? This mess keeps getting worse," she started crying, something also very un-Sharon like. "I can't be having twins. I was dealing with the idea of how different life, retirement, was going to be now that I have to resort myself to preschool pickup and middle school science fairs again. Twins! Oh, this is awful," she sobbed.
Dr. Collins put down the ultrasound wand, "There, there, Sharon. Look, let's get the tech in here to do all the measurements. Based on what I saw, you look pretty far along, Sharon. We need to get this figured out now so we can go from here. Amazingly, your blood pressure was decent today, but that is one major concern, so you need to calm down."
Sharon continued to sniffle as she caught her breath, "Twins. The biggest mess of her life had gotten even worse. Why couldn't she have continued to ignore it? Oh, right? It was growing in front of her very eyes, and it had popped a couple weeks ago when all of a sudden none of her clothes fit. Her meltdown in Tampa seemed like months ago, not just a couple weeks ago. Once she'd pulled herself off the floor that day, she'd gone out and blown her clothing budget for the year on things that fit. She figured if her situation wasn't going away anytime soon, she'd better have clothing that fit, plus, if the clothing fit, it wasn't such a reminder of what was under the clothing, growing away, minute by minute.
Sharon's memory was jolted back to reality when the ultrasound tech came in with Dr. Collins to start checking on the babies-oh, the BABIES. Two of them. It couldn't get worse, well it could if something was wrong with them. Sharon bit her lip and pulled herself up to watch the screen.
"Sharon, you thought January, right? It's looking like the measurements, even for two babies, well, it's looking like you are 18 weeks along, maybe just a little further. We can see there are two, and I can definitely tell you what they are if you want to know each baby's gender?" the tech offered.
Sharon's eyes flew open, "I'm that far along? I really didn't think I was," she shook her head. The first time. Tampa. It had to be Tampa, the city where everything seemed to always go wrong. Tampa was now where she'd broken everything off with Andy, then months later first gotten together with Steve, where all of this had now been documented as happening, and of course, the same place a month later Andy had discovered what she'd done. Tampa, a city she really had liked was now somewhere she didn't want to see again.
"Yes, you are definitely that far along," the tech said. "You didn't know you were pregnant?" the tech questioned.
Sharon fell back on the table, "Oh, no, I knew. I was the idiot trying to deny it," she huffed, as more tears formed. What was wrong with her? She was a blubbering mess. Sharon sat up quickly again, "Wait, you said you could tell me what I'm having? Really?"
The tech nodded, "Yup, so do you want to know? Everything else looks good, amazingly. No offense, but with your age, lack of care, that's really a blessing."
Sharon nodded, taking everything in, "Yes, what am I having?"
The tech smiled, "Fraternal twins, a boy and a girl."
Instead of the pure joy she should feel for things being okay and then for knowing she was having a hopefully healthy baby boy and girl, she started crying again. The tech finished up and quickly left, placing some photos on the table for Sharon.
Dr. Collins cleared her throat as Sharon continued her breakdown, "Sharon, we have a lot to discuss. You still have other important tests to see if these little people are okay in there. There's also the matter of added stress," she said sternly looking at Sharon who was still trying to stop crying, "and the future. You had mentioned a lot of travel for a new job. That's going to have to change. These babies are due around the end of September, earlier due to your age and twins, for sure. With it already the end of April, you don't have a lot of time, but I think you have a lot of life changes to make. So, sit up, get dressed, and we'll sit down to figure this out."
Sharon left the office an hour and a half later, totally exhausted, equipped with pictures of her babies. Oh gosh, two more babies. The advice given was to figure out a different job arrangement because months of travel wouldn't work for a pregnant woman with her issues and then as a single mom with two infants at home. Sharon found herself wandering around a baby store. She didn't have anywhere else to go, and she didn't to go home and face Rusty yet, on the off chance he'd be home this afternoon. He'd gotten groceries before she returned, so she was free for the afternoon. She wandered around, looking at all the happy faces, realizing she wasn't happy at all. She glazed over all the stuff, so much more stuff than when she had Emily or Ricky; it was overwhelming, and she'd already done this twice. She wandered around in there for over an hour, leaving empty handed. While these babies were a reality, the fact she needed to get ready for them was not.
Rusty texted her later that he was picking up Chinese, her favorite. Except, she couldn't stomach the idea. Luckily, she hadn't been one who got sick with pregnancy, but certain foods didn't sound great to her. Chinese didn't, but she couldn't exactly tell Rusty that on text-sorry, the two babies I'm carrying aren't into Chinese. So, she said she'd see him soon.
Rusty arrived, and Sharon had strategically seated herself at the kitchen table, working on her laptop. After Rusty put all the food out and stopped talking, which took awhile; he was glad Sharon was home, he asked her how her day was.
"Rusty, there's something I need to tell you," Sharon said, tears welling up again.
"Something's wrong! You're sick, right? Gus and I didn't say anything last night, but we both thought you looked bad. What's wrong?" he asked in a panic.
Sharon patted his arm, "Rusty, hold on," and Sharon stood, and with her shirt, she didn't want to admit was getting too tight, showed Rusty the problem. "Rusty, I'm pregnant."
Rusty dropped his fork onto his plate, his shocked expression mirrored that of ones Sharon had had the last few weeks, "What?" he asked, "I didn't think you could- "Wait, so this is great. Andy didn't mention to me things were going so well, but I guess you don't want to hear that kind of talk from your parents," he nodded, "Sharon, you like look pretty pregnant. Why didn't you tell me? I just had dinner with Andy two nights ago, and he didn't say anything. Where is he? Shouldn't he be here?"
"Rusty," Sharon patted his arm to stop his rant, as she sat back down, sat back now and rested her arms on her visible rounded stomach, "Rusty, this is the hard part, one I'm not proud of at all. It's not Andy's."
Rusty's shock remained. He was speechless, as he put together what she'd just said, "What do you mean it's not Andy's? Sharon, whose is it?"
Sharon rested her hands on her stomach and absentmindedly started running circles on it with her hands, "Rusty, while I don't want to get into the specifics, I was involved with someone through work, and that created this mess and more. I broke things off with Andy," she added.
Rusty, still stunned, nodded, "Yeah, I know, awhile ago, but he kept saying he wanted to get you back. I know he flew to Tampa to see you. He's kept up with where you are every single week, and when he heard you were going back to Tampa, well he mumbled something about needing to fix what he messed up there. I thought me had. He hasn't said much to me since about it, other than my telling him what city you are in each week, but honestly, I thought that was because you two were talking a lot more, and he didn't need to ask."
Sharon put her hand on top of Rusty's, "Honey, no. It's such a mess," she caught her breath, "he saw me with the man, Steve, a man I am definitely not seeing anymore. I made such a mess," she said as she let out a sob before she caught herself.
"So, that's really not his kid?" he pointed.
Sharon shook her head, saddened, "No, with all my heart, I wish it was, but no."
"You're like old, Sharon, and seeing someone else? I thought you loved Andy. Here I am, not wanting to know any of this stuff, but Sharon, you guys have been like my parents. You're supposed to stay together!" Rusty exclaimed.
Sharon nodded, "You're right. We are. I did love Andy. I do love Andy; I just freaked out and convinced myself I was better without him. I guess you could say I had a mid-life crisis, and I can't tell you how much I regret that now. "
"So, what about this guy, Steve? Is he like going to be around here all the time now? I finally got used to Andy; he's not going to replace Andy," Rusty sighed.
Sharon shook her head, "No, he will absolutely not be involved. I still need to deal with that, but I can promise you he will not. Rusty, I can't discuss all that right now. I will, but know I'm having a hard-enough time with all this," she said, tears forming again.
Rusty patted her arm, "Sharon, it's going to be okay. I'm really irritated with things, and I can't believe you did this to Andy, but I'm still your son. I'm not going to like leave or anything. Wait, what did Andy say about this? Oh, this could be bad," he shook his head.
"He doesn't know. I need to deal with him next," she sighed. "This," she waved at her stomach, "isn't going away, and I'm afraid it could get worse before it gets better where Andy is concerned. There's something else I need to tell you regarding Andy."
Rusty looked at her puzzled.
"Rusty, Andy has been drinking again, and I'm afraid it's because of me. He started drinking again after he came to Tampa and saw me with Steve," Sharon stated.
Rusty sat there, stunned, "Are you sure? He wasn't drunk when we had dinner."
Sharon nodded, "Lieutenant Provenza told me, yes. I don't know if he's still drinking, but I at least know he has been. That's something I want to find out."
Rusty shook his head, "So, all of this-that kid in there, Andy drinking-you are the root of it? You and some guy? Sharon, I know you weren't like that with Andy, but really?"
Sharon nodded, "Rusty, I've made a lot of mistakes recently that I'm not proud of nor can I change. My life is more of a mess now than when I was tangled up in Jack's messes," she sighed.
Rusty just sat, silent, and finally he spoke, "So, that," he indicated pointing at her stomach, "that little problem there as you'll probably call it, when are you due? Are you like healthy and all?"
Sharon sighed, "I had my first appointment today. Rusty, I have tried to deny the obvious for a long time. I tried to convince myself I couldn't be pregnant for a long time, even though I could see this stomach forming before my eyes."
"Sharon, there's like no question you are pregnant. How did I not see it last night?" he asked.
"I was careful, coat and bags," she shrugged, "and believe me, I know it's obvious. It's not just a little "holiday weight" or something. I had my first appointment, and we are healthy. The issue is the we part," Sharon trailed off.
"Why do I get the feeling there's more-just tell me, Sharon," Rusty explained.
"It's twins," Sharon said, tearing up again. "My awful life mess, this terrible mistake, it's resulting in not one, but two babies. I messed up so badly," she sobbed.
Rusty jumped up, trying to console her, but not knowing what to do. He'd never seen Sharon fall apart like this; she'd always been so put together. Granted she'd never been pregnant, and yeah, this was a huge mess.
Rusty hugged Sharon for a few minutes until she waved him away, "I'm sorry. I've been crying non-stop. Rusty, I just hope you aren't too disappointed in me. I've done one terrible thing after another, and I'm sorry."
"Sharon, you've never judged me, and I'm not going to judge you. Yeah, it's disappointing to hear what happened, and it doesn't sound like you, but I get that you were in a bad place. I'm just sorry it's a mess. Worst of all, I can't believe Andy fell apart too. Sharon, we have to help him," Rusty added.
Sharon hummed, "Rusty, if I've learned anything, you can't help people unless they want to be helped, but hopefully, he does. Keep doing things with him. I'm glad that hasn't stopped. I wasn't ready to be helped for awhile; I had convinced myself that my new, carefree lifestyle was a good idea, until it wasn't. Now, I'm ready for help, but I don't think anyone can help me. Andy-it has to come from within himself, but he loves you very much; don't forget that, and don't turn your back on him."
"Well, yeah," Rusty shrugged, "Awhile ago, he said something about that he'd always be there for me, no matter what. I guess that's what he meant."
Sharon nodded, "Rusty, if it's okay with you, I'm not going to eat. I don't have an appetite right now. Oh, and please, I'll tell Emily and Ricky this week, but please don't say anything. There are things I need to handle first, starting with Andy before I do any more damage."