The chaos sisters

*Crash*
"Gimme that!"
"You have to catch me first!"
"Fine! Take that!"
"OW! No fair!"
"Fair? I'll show you fair you little demon!"
*Boom*

'They couldn't have waited until the afternoon to start this?' I thought as I got out of my bed
"Let's see what the damage is this morning..."

I opened my door and followed the hallway into the living room, or what was left of it- the place was converted into a warzone, complete with barbed wire and trenches

I summoned a rubber band ball and threw it into the middle of the field, the ball exploded and when the smoke cleared Screwball and Eris were suspended from the ceiling by said rubber bands

"What? We're kinda in the middle of something here" Screwball said
"What's all of this about?"
"She took the last waffles!" She pointed a hoof at Eris
"Really?" I sighed "You can use magic, why not just make more?"

Screwball's muzzle turned red from embarassment
"I thought so, and no more fighting for the rest of the day"
"Aw, not even a little?"
"Don't you go have to turn the bathroom orange or something?"
"Shoot! You're right!" she said as she left
"Do you two always fight like that?" I asked
"No, only over the really big stuff like waffles" Eris replied, rolling her eyes
"Isn't it a little early for sarcasm?"
"Nope, not at all"
"Was that sarcasm?"
"No"
"Was that?"
"N- wait a minute, you're messing with me, aren't you?"
"Eeyup"
"Ah, I see what you did there..."
"Uh-huh, now I'm going to make up for some lost sleep" I said as I sat on the couch
"You just woke up"
"Because of you and Screwball arguing"
"Oh, right, sorry about that"
"It's okay, I guess I'm going to have to get used to stuff like that happening- don't kill each other, I'll be up in a little while"
I dozed off after a few minutes

*Knock Knock Knock*
'Huh? wha?'
I was awoken from my nap by a loud knocking at the front door, I tried getting up but was quickly stopped when I found Eris's head laying across my form, the rest of her body was curled in on itself while her tail hung over the armrest
"Eris, pssst, Eris wake up"
"Hm? OH!"
She was blushing slightly as she pushed herself off of me and the couch
"Wh-what?"
"Someone was knocking at the front door"
"That's ridiculous, nopony can-"

"This is the Royal Guard, open up or we'll break the door down!"
"How in Tatarus did they-"

*Cr-cr-cra-cra-ck-ck-ck*

She was interupted as the door was kicked in and skidded across the floor
I grabbed her talon hand/claw and ran into the hallway,
I went into Screwball's room and took her by a hoof
"Hey! What's the big idea?"
"Them" I said, indicating the guards behind us

She gulped and nodded

We went to the window at the end of the hall, shoving both of them into a well-placed cannon, I lit the fuse and hopped in myself

*Booooom!*

The three of us went hurling through the sky, over the buildings and streets of Canterlot, over some green fields and into a small town

We landed on a dark blue cloud in one of the fields outside the town
"How did they find us?" I asked
"I don't know- it should have been impossible for them to get to us" Eris replied
"Looks like we're near Ponyville now"
"An original name"
"Tell me about it..."
"Do you know what that was Pinkie?" a mare's voice asked
"Nope! I just know it fell out of the sky" another answered
"I don't know TWilight, you think we should be out here? This close to the Everfree?"
"We'll be fine, Applejack, I doubt the monsters that live there will leave the forest borders"
"Goodness, what in the world is that?"
I turned and saw a group of six mares, one of which was pointing a hoof at me
"You don't think that's Discord's work, do ya?"
"Could you please not refer to me as 'that'? I'd prefer 'him' or 'he'"
"What are you?"
"I'm not a 'what' I'm a 'who', and my name is Accord"
"Well...Accord, what are you doing out here all by yourself?"

"I'm not, I'm-"

I looked around and saw that Eris and Screwball were gone
{We're right here}
'Eris? Are both of you inside my head?'
{The short answer is 'yes'}
[It's really empty in here, this place could use some cleaning]
'HaHa, very funny- just don't touch anything in there'
[I make no promises!]
I snapped back to the situation and realized the pink mare was waving a hoof in front of my eyes
"Yoohoo Accord! You in there?"
"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine..."
"You look like you were in a daze, sugarcube"
"No, I just have a lot on my mind"
'Literally'
"Um...are you, okay? Discord didn't...make you or, anything?" Fluttershy said
"No, I'm just uh- new here"
"Oh"
"I'll um, just be going now- I've got someplace to be..."
"Wait!" Twilight shouted
"What?"
"Are you the only one of your...kind?"
"In this world, yes"
"What do you mean 'In this world'?"
'Crap! I revealed too much'
"I'll just- go"

And with that I took off

"Stop him!"
I ran as fast as I could with the six following me I felt a pair of hooves push me, which caused me to trip with said pony pinning me down
"Let me go!"
"Quiet you; Applejack, get some rope!"
"Here you go!"
"Pinkie, where did you get that?"
"It was just laying around" she replied simply

Applejack took the rope and proceeded to bind my hands and feet, to top it off Pinkie pulled out a gag and the rainbow-maned pegasus stuck it in my mouth
{Didn't expect you to get caught that fast-}
[Hahahahaha, this is gold! I'll be watching the replay for days! Heeheehee]
'Glad you two are enjoying yourselves'
{Relax}
'I was just bound and gagged by ponies, I don't think this is a good time to relax'
[Didn't daddy give you your own powers?]
'Yes, but I don't- ohhhhhhh'
I would have face-palmed had the situation allowed it
{Look out, we've got a genius in our midst}
'Both of you knock it off please'
The ropes dissolved into water and fell from my wrists and ankles, I got up and started running again
"Oh no you don't!"
"Get back here!"
"So you can trap me again? No way!"
I felt a sharp pain in my stomach and I collapsed

Poke.

"Five more minutes..."

Poke Poke

"Wake up sleepyhead"
"Eris? What're you doing?"
"Keeping you out of trouble, now get up, we're getting out of here"
"I find that hard to believe"
"Just get up..."
I pushed myself off a bed and looked around the room
"Where are we?" I asked
"After TWilight used that stun-spell on you she brought you back to the library, you're in her basement now"
"Didn't see that coming"
I looked up to see the door opening

"Beat it! It's the fuzz!" Screwball screamed/whispered
They both teleported out of the room as a tall pony with wings and a horn came down the stairs
"Hey"
"Greetings, I am Princess Celestia"
"Hello princess, forgive me if I don't salute or anything but being bound and gagged and getting tased in the same day has taken a lot out of me"
"Yes, you'll have to forgive Twilight, she can get a little overexcited when it comes to learning something new"
"Thanks for the heads up, anyway, I'm Accord"
"Hello Accord, I assume you have a number of questions"
"How did you know I was here?"
"My sister and I detected your presence"

'That explains how those guards found us, there's one mystery solved'
"So let me guess, you're the one who sent those guards after us"
"Your assumption is correct, but I wish we could have met under better circumstances"
"Me too"
"Now, about your 'companions'..."

'Please don't tell me she's talking about them'

"I-I- don't know who you're referring to..."
"I think you know very well who"
"Um, no, I don't" I lied
"I know you're lying, now tell me"
"I won't!"
"You must! They're a danger to society"
"Never!"
"Fine, I was hoping you would comply, but since you won't, I'll have to resort to other methods"
Her horn lit up and she and I were transported to a courtyard
"It pains me to do this, but you leave me no choice"
"What're you-"
I felt myself being forced down and my wrists and neck were stuck
"You've got to be kidding me, stocks? Really?"
"I hope you decide to tell me what I want to hear"
And she teleported to who-knows-where
"Well, I'm stuck here for a while"
"You got that right you goof, what'd you do that for?"
"What did you think? Protecting you two"
"Wh-why?"
"I don't know, probably because I care?"
Eris's face fell
"You didn't need to do that..."
"Yes I did, I wasn't just going to rat you out like that"
"But-"
"I think you two should get out of here before she comes back"

She sighed and both of them disappeared

'What have I gotten myself into?'

A number of guards had already stopped to gawk at the 'monster' in the courtyard, a few groups effectively blocking the hall in a few places
"Would you mind not staring?" I said "I'm sure you have other duties to attend to"
A few of them left, but most stayed where they were

"Sister, ist thou sure that was the wisest course of action?"
"As I told him, I take no pleasure in doing this- but it was what I felt was best"
"Discord has been detained, why do you worry?"
"His daughters are still at large, if nothing else they are guilty by association, and only Accord knows where they are"
"But to have him placed in the stocks?"
"I would have interrogated him, but I desperately need to know where they are-"
"Thou hast made a mistake, it is not the first time nor is it the last"
"I suppose you're right, I'll have Shining Armor release him"
"We suggest he be put under careful supervision"
"Didn't you just tell me that he wouldn't do well in the stocks?"
"Yes, but you would also like to see him treated like a normal prisoner, how long has it been since you have used ye old stocks?"
Celestia blushed a little
"Captain!"

The padlock on my stocks fell to the ground
"What's going on?" I asked
"We're moving you" a guard said
"Where?"
"A cell in the dungeons"
'Of course'
"Well it's better than this"
I stood up and arched my back
"Feels good to stand up straight again"
"Follow us"

I trailed the guards that lead me down to a holding cell beneath the castle
The one on the right opened the door, I obliged and entered, he closed the door I stretched out on the cot

'Sooooooo'
{Gettin' bored there, tex?}
'Kinda, yeah'
[That's what you get for letting yourself get caught]
'I'm not even going to respond to that...'
[I think you just did]
'That's not what I meant-'
[I know, I just like messing with you]
'That's an understatement'
{This is nothing, try living with her}
'I did'
{Yeah, for like, a day}
'Point taken'
[I'm not that bad!]
{Rrrrriiiiiiggggggghhhhhhtttttt}
[Hmmph]
{By the way, good luck, you're going to need it}
'What're you-'
One of the guards rapped on the bars with his spear
"Get up, the princesses want to see you"
"I can just tell how this is going to end"

"Nice to see you again, Accord"
"Hi Celestia"
"So thou art the human my sister has told Us about"
"Yes, my name is Accord your highness"
"We are Princess Luna, nice to know you"
"Um, likewise your- highnesses?"
"Forgive me, sometimes We- I slip into using the Royal 'We'"
"Ah, that makes sense..."
'Not'
"Now that we have introductions out of the way, let's get to business"
"I've already told you I won't tell you where they are"
"They're a threat to national security"
"Why are you so obsessed with catching them?"
"I care for my subjects, I don't want them causing the same trouble Discord did"
"As suprising as this is, they're almost nothing like Discord- sure they've got a silly streak, heck, so do I- but that's no reason to hunt them down and trying to get me to tell you where they are"
"They are enemies of the state, and if you fail to comply, so will you"
"That's basically blackmail, you know that right?"
"Call it what you will, but I must know where they are"
"I can tell you're usually a benevolent ruler, but I'll tell you this- I could have left anytime I wanted, I just wanted to try and prove to you that they're not as dangerous as you think they are, obviously I can't get my point across"
I snapped my fingers and I teleported out of the throne room

"Why must I be so stubborn?" Celestia asked
"'Tis his own fault he will not tell you"
"But this could have gone better, it's as much my fault as it is his"
"Dost thou still want to capture the daughters of chaos?"
"At first I was detemined to get them, but after his testimony- I find myself questioning my motives. Is it true they're not as bad as I first thought them to be?"
"We would not know, you can only make the decision that you think is best"

"So how'd it go?" Eris asked
"Didn't you hear everything?" I said
"Yeah, but I want to know anyway"
"Long story short I think I may have made our situation worse"
"How so?"
"I kinda got mad at Celestia for wanting me to tell where you and Screwball were"
"Did you now?"
I rolled my eyes
"Are you always this flippant? This is both of your futures we're talking about"
"And yours too, by the way"
"Guess you're right, no use worrying about what could happen"
"'Course I am, now come on"
"Where are we going?"
"To pull a few pranks, you square. Where else?"
"Do you really think that's the best thing to do right now? Given our problems?"
"Not even one teeny tiny harmless prank?"

Don't look, don't look- curse those puppy-dog eyes

"Fine, as long as you keep it small AND it doesn't hurt anyone"
"It's not much to work with, but I'll take it"

Meanwhile, in Ponyville, a banana cream pie explodes in Rarity's face

"There, better?"
"Better"
"So now what do we do?" Screwball asked
"Let's head for Ponyville"
"Is that a good idea? It's where the Elements of Harmony are" I said
"Exactly, it's the last place they'll look"
"Unless we get caught"
"But we won't"
"How do you-"
"I just do, now let's go"
She snapped her lion hand and we were outside of Ponyville
"Where're we going to live?"
"I've got an idea"
I snapped my fingers and a small two-story house appeared
"Getting used to your powers are we?"
"Maybe..."
"Nice digs" Screwball said, walking into the house
"Your room is upstairs"

She buzzed up the stairs and I closed the door behind us as Eris and I walked into the living room

I sat on the couch as Eris looked around the house
"This is pretty nice, there're worse places to live"
"Glad you like it, I sort of based it off of the apartment in Canterlot"
"Oh"
"So I guess now would be a good time to ask why you were sleeping on me this morning"
Eris turned and I saw that she was blushing heavily
"You remember that, huh?"
"Uh-huh"
"Well, I was, uh, giving you a hard time!"
"I'll take that answer since I know I won't get the real one out of you, I'm going to check on Screwball"

"Wait!"
"What?"
"Um, I wanted to ask you a 'hypothetical' question"
"Uh, okay. what is it?"
"If we were- dating"
She blushed harder
"-would you want, me to look like a female of your species?"
"An interesting question...I suppose if we were in love I'd want you to be you"
I didn't notice the confused look on her face as I climbed up the stairs

As I got closer to Screwball's room I thought I heard sniffling
"Screwy, you okay?" I asked, pushing open the door

"I'm fine" She said in her best 'everything is normal' voice
"Really? Doesn't sound like it"
"J-Just leave m-me alone"
"Hey, what's the matter?" I asked, crouching down
"You'd just make fun of me..."
"No I wouldn't, I think you know me a little better than that"

She mumbled something incoherent

"What?"
She looked up with tears threatening to fall
"I miss Daddy" She said in a soft whisper

'Why am I the one that's always in these positions?'

I picked her up and gave her a hug

"It's going to be alright"
"N-no it won't"
"You don't know that, I'm sure Discord will be out and about giving Celestia migraines in no time"

She buried her face in my shoulder and cried, I stood up and paced around her room until she was able to calm down

"You feeling better?" I asked
"*Sniff* A bit"
"Now anything else on your mind?"
Still carrying her, I pulled back the covers on her bed and set her down, I put the covers over her
"Will the princesses use the Elements on us?"
I was about to answer when I saw her, those fearful eyes wanted to make me to break down and cry right there
'Not if I have anything to say about it...'
"Just try not to think about it and get some sleep, alright?"
"O-ok-kay"
"Sweet dreams, Screwball"
"G'night Accord"

I turned and went to the door, turning off her bedroom light off as I left