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Silver Lining

Part II

Stranger To Brother

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"With your last breath we scream my name

As I was yours and cracks beneath

And fear run down

The scars are long

There's no more warmth

There's nothing for me here."

Warmth, Koda

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Kakashi could feel his hands shaking as he followed the Third through the hospital. They twisted through corridors, went through procedures, talked to someone who looked important, but when they ended up outside a heavily guarded hospital room with Iryō-nins coming in and out, Kakashi couldn't remember when they left the Office. He couldn't even remember what his answer was.

"Do you want to see him?"

"…"

…Does he?

As if hit with his own chidori, Kakashi felt an overwhelming sense of guilt, sadness and anger that made the knot in his stomach twist uncomfortably. Of course he wanted to see him. He was…family?

That didn't feel as reassuring as it should have.

Everyone who was precious to him has died, and some way or another it was his fault. Everything was his fault. If this kid who was related to him got too close…

Kakashi didn't even want to think about it.

He didn't want to think about how the kid grew up in the care of Orochimaru-shit don't think about it don't think about it don't care don't start caring it'll make leaving him all that worse –

"Oh!"

Being pulled out of his trance Kakashi's senses came back to him and his eyes focused on the man in a lab coat staring at him like a gaping fish. The man's jaw opened and closed before his eyes settled on the Hokage besides him.

"Is this him?"

Kakashi frowned, turning to the Third in silent question. Not surprisingly he was ignored in favor for the Medic before them.

"He is," the Third confirmed and sent Kakashi a gentle look. "I'll be leaving you in Shouhei's care, if I weren't the Hokage I would stay with you. But alas, I am, so any questions you want to ask me will be answered by him."

Bowing his head, Kakashi didn't wait for the Third to leave before whirling his head to the Doctor. Said man jumped at the sudden movement.

"How am I related to this kid?"

Shouhei blinked. "…What?"

"How am I related to this kid? My Tou-san di-" He faltered for a moment, cursing himself at how fragile he seemed today. "Tou-san was long gone before this kid was even born. I have no other relatives that are alive, I'm the only one. So how are we related?"

The Iryō-nin raised an eyebrow and looked at him in confusion. "…Born?"

Is his brain underdeveloped? Kakashi narrowed an eye.

"I'm sorry, it seems that you were misinformed." He laughed sheepishly. Kakashi stared, brooding and impatient. "'The kid', you have so affectionately named him, doesn't have an umbilicus. Or as other's call it, a belly button."

That bit of information unsettled Kakashi, making the knot in his stomach twist painfully. Fate seems to be playing with me today.

"What does that mean?"

"The kid doesn't have a mother. He wasn't born, he was…well, he was made."

The unsettled feeling reared into disgust. Horror filled him, spreading with disbelief and ice-cold fury. His heart slammed against his ribs. What had Orochimaru done?

"I have no idea how he did it." The Iryō-nin continued, completely oblivious to Kakashi's internal turmoil. "It goes against the very fabric of nature. You can't just create a human being, but, well," he snorted bitterly, "that's Orochimaru for yah. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the how. My team and I have read through every bit of his research, and it seems Orochimaru himself doesn't know how it happened. All his past tries have been failures but it seems this kid was the miracle worker. Fully functioning organs, high intelligence…and a little sarcastic from what I've read."

"From what you've read?" Kakashi asked weakly, the blood pounding in his ears growing louder Shouhei spoke.

"Yeah," the Iryō-nin sighed, gaze turning to the room where the child lay. "There was an incident when anbu found him. The kid took a nasty blow to the head and hasn't woken up since. We can't do anything but wait for him to wake up. If Tsunade was here though…"

Kakashi held up a hand to stop him. "About the relation between myself and him…"

"Hmm." Shouhei hummed and nodded. "Biologically speaking, you two are related. Just because he wasn't birthed by a mother doesn't mean he isn't a human being. From what I've read in Orochimaru's journals, he's got life. He's got a soul."

Kakashi blinked, stunned. His brow furrowed. "A soul? Orochimaru made a soul?"

That made the man laugh. "No," he shook his head, "that's what I meant by that child being a miracle. What Orochimaru didn't factor in when trying to create a person, was that what makes us human is our soul. We can't function without it. It's our intangible heart. Somehow Kami blew life into your Ototo– "

"He's not my out Ototo." He stated weakly, as though convincing himself.

The Iryō-nin paused, staring at Kakashi both in sympathy and confusion. "Ah. Then why are you here if you don't acknowledge him as such?"

He couldn't answer that, because frankly speaking he doesn't understand it himself.

"Curiosity."

"Well that's convincing." The Iryō-nin muttered.

Kakashi could do little more than narrow his eye dangerously, ghosts of the people he cherished whispering at the back of his mind.

"So I take it you don't want to see him then. Your not-Ototo?"

Ah, there was the question again. It both excited and terrified him. Of course he wanted to see him. They shared blood, even if it wasn't from a natural source Kakashi could feel him. He was pack. He could smell and sense him when they entered the hospital. And besides, he liked the idea of having family again, to have somebody waiting at home for you.

But then, there was the guilt, the worry, the fear of failing him like he did everyone else. He was a curse upon the people he loved. A toy fate played with for its own sick amusement.

…What was he to do though?

Abandon him like Naruto? Leave him to live his life as an orphan? To feel unwanted? Unloved? Like he treated his father-nonono don't.

Kakashi stiffened. Shame clogged his throat. This isn't like his father; this is a completely different situation. Then he could see it, the unwanted images of his father playing behind his eyes. Kakashi tried to shove them away only to hear Obito's voice.

"Kakashi…take care of…Rin…"

"Shut up." He hissed.

"What?" Shouhei turned to Kakashi, raised eyebrow. "Did you just tell me to – "

"I want to see him." Whether he liked it or not, he was pack. If he ignored the…the kid Pakkun would chew his head off for sure this time. He almost did when he told him about Naruto.

"Are you sure?" The Iryō-nin asked suspiciously.

"Yes." He said. No, he thought, body suddenly trembling without permission.

"Because I had distinct the feeling you were about to abandon him." The man continued. Kakashi almost scowled.

"Maa." He flapped a hand, feeling a smidgen more comfortable hiding behind his lazy persona. "I figured people would have known we were related anyway since I hear we share some familial features. I don't want a kid following me around demanding if we're related or not. It would be troublesome."

The Iryō-nin snorted with a disbelieving look and waved Kakashi inside the hospital room, calling the other Iryō-nins out.

Soon it was just the two of them (aside from the anbu hidden in the room).

Kakashi was rooted to the spot, eyes wide and uncertain. Slowly he walked to the bed, hand outstretched. Wavering with uncertainty before he patted the small head of spiky silver hair. Just like mine, he thought.

His eyes traced the soft features, similar to his own and old pictures of his father. But then they stopped. Suspiciously, Kakashi leaned in to get a better look. Just around the eyes he could spot thin lines.

Thin purple lines around the eyes.

Shaking hands clenched into fists and his sharingan blazed behind his hitai-ate.

"Orochimaru."

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