Author's Note: Short and crappy drabble. L Hopefully this doesn't become a habit, but I just wanted to write this even though my creative juices weren't flowing. Hope ya'll like it anyway, this is the first pure crack Silent Hill dabbling I've done. With a little hint of Yaoi mixed XD. I love SH Yaoi. SO if you're opposed to yaoi, ignore the hint of yaoiness. You may like it anyway XD. I WISH TO CONVERT YOU PEOPLE!!! HAHA!!! (joke to all those that are two nickels short of a quarter, if you know what I mean 'eyebrow raise'.) Enjoy.
PH - FANGIRL DRABBLE
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SUGGESTED/CONTRIBUTED BY: Crazycheesyperson (loved the idea of this story, thank you so very much for giving me some material XD. If you have any more suggestions, I will pay close attention on keeping tabs of them. Your participation is very much appreciated. Though your idea of the story probably is better than what I could do XD Hope you enjoy.)
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Summary: Pyramid Head + 1000 Fangirls. Poor guy.
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Fangirlism: of or pertaining to that of a female whom practices the ancient art of fangirling religiously. These women become crazed or potentially obsessive when denied the objects of their fantasies. They should be avoided at all cost if possible. O.O
If you ever do happen to "diss" the object of fantasy in question towards a fan girl, you will probably be dead within twenty seconds or less, unless you bribe or distract them with things involving the fantasy. They can be very violent when opposed.
BEWARE!!!
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It happened so suddenly that nobody had the slightest idea of what was to come til they had come flooding in, coating the nice fog-covered streets with something that could only be described as one of the most terrifying things that had ever set foot in Silent Hill.
When they had finally figured it out it had been far too late, the only thing to do now was to run for cover, less they be ravaged.
For three days Pyramid Head himself, the big bad villain, the guilt, lust, and all possible evil feelings of all the people who ventured into Silent Hill, had sat in the basement of the hospital, the door locked and bolted while he hid from these horrendous creatures.
He had counted down his options from the first moment they had invaded, bringing their 'original' SH t-shirts and bobble headed dolls of characters, all being equipped with internet accessible laptops to read the latest "PH" fan fiction.
And after all of this time, he had finally come to the conclusion that he was absolutely doomed.
Doomed, with no chance of escape.
DOOMED!!!
What may you ask these creatures of the darkest and possibly the most terrifying things in the world of Silent Hill is?
Did you guess it right?
Are you sure…?
That's right…fan girls…
He certainly couldn't take down all of them; they were like little cockroaches, harder to kill than one that was for sure. When one was taken down another squealing one would take her bubble-headed place, attaching herself to him like a leach, her legs locked around his body or legs as she gushed on and on about how much she utterly loved him, wanted to marry him, thought he was hot (which was kind of weird because his face wasn't visible to judge on the hotness…but maybe they just like the mystery of it or something) or the classic (equally annoying) "can I have you autograph!?"
The first time he had seem one of the hideous things had been one of the most awful moments of his life.
There he had been in the hospital hallway, innocently prancing after the psychotic-and-ever-so-cute-when-he's-frightened-to death-of-having-a-giant-sword-shoved-up-where-the-sun-doesn't-shine James, along with that stupid Maria slut, who held onto his James like she was practically going to attempt to rape him even though they were running for their lives, dragging his great knife in an effort to finally put the hoe down.
Just as he had gotten near the elevator and FINALLY the woman had gotten stuck outside of the elevator, away from James, he raised his knife, preparing to FINALLY get her, when he felt something bump into him, making him fall off balance and fall to the ground in a heap due to the weight of his sword going all to one side.
He tried to hurry back up, but by the time he got back up the elevator door opened, letting Maria in and letting the hoe escape from his grasp one again.
"OH MY GAWD!" He heard a squeal from the direction in which he was bumped, the squealing ringing even through the metal encasing on his head, reaching his ears where it rang like someone had just had a tap-dancing lesson his head.
Furiously, he turned towards whoever made that horrendous noise.
"GIRLS, GIRLS, OMG, OMG, I FOUND HIM!!! OVER HERE!!!" The creature in question squealed in excitement, a blonde haired young teenage girl with braces, a bouncy ponytail and a red-from-excitement face.
And then they appeared like the little roaches crawling into darkness that they were, screaming with excitement that made him want to kill them for just living…and letting that slut escape with JAMES. The hallway crowded up, looking like a red-carpet event for Zac Efron, thousands of young pubescent and pimple-faced girls beginning to crowd around him.
Before they attacked.
One attached herself to his leg, like a suction cup, rattling off things that she loved about him, before another got onto his arm, causing him to drop the great knife.
He suddenly felt his clothes being pulled off too, his great knife being pulled away by about twenty fan girls before they all jumped onto him at one, smothering him in fangirlish love.
He thought for a moment he was going to die, before suddenly he shoved the girls off, taking a run for the elevator in much the same way that Maria and James had earlier, much quicker without the great knife by his side.
Almost immediately the girls took off after him, one almost getting into the elevator as he furiously pressed the buttons for the basement, desperate.
For once in his life he was scared shitless.
He had been unarmed, scared shitless, and was about to be raped by a pack of rabid fan girls.
That is how he came to be locked here, in the hospital basement, rocking slowly back and forth as he listened to the fan girls from above, hoping to whatever god their might be that they wouldn't find him.
It was only a matter of time…
And then they came.
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One Month Later…
"Now, tell us about yourself Mr.…" The woman glanced at her pad of paper. "Pyramid head, is it?"
"Yes, that's right." The metal-masked traumatized man said in a sulky voice. Around his was a circle of people, some listening intently to what the woman in the middle said and some not.
"And can you tell us your version of why you were sent to this session of therapy?" The woman asked again, nodding her head towards him.
"Well, Doc, I just…" He began, but the woman interrupted him.
"You can just call me Angie instead of Doctor, Pyramid Head; I'm your friend as well as your psychiatrist, you can open up to me, you can open up to all these people, they have gone through the same thing as you." She said in a 'comforting' voice, scooting her chair over to put her arm around Pyramid Head's shoulders in a 'comforting' manner.
"Fangirls…attacked…I never thought it would happen to me, ya know? I saw those 'Fangirl's Gone Wild' videos on real life television…but I just never thought I was popular enough to be…" Pyramid Head cut off, his voice choking up. "How could this happen to me?"
"We're all here for you Pyramid, why, didn't you have that same experience just recently, Walter?" She asked, directing this question towards the serial killer who sat in the far corner of the room, his blonde head of hair lowered.
"…"
"Walter?" Dr. Martinez asked, moving toward the suddenly depressed looking blonde male.
"I want my mommy…!" Walter suddenly said, bursting out in tears, to which the doctor once again rubbed his back 'comfortingly.'
"We're going to get through this together, everyone!" The doctor said cheerfully.
"..."
It was then that Pyramid Head concluded he was truly…
…in hell.
Therapy Hell.
THE ENDXXX :D
NOTE: Like I said, this was crappy and short. Hope you at least got one laugh out of it though. XD
NEXT DRABBLE: ALEX & WALTER