The third time Amy kisses a girl, she's a freshman in college and she has Liam Booker to thank for it.
(The second time, the one after Karma, a girl named Rachel who she meets at another of Shane's parties… well.. the less said about that, the better.)
Her name (third time girl) is Reagan and Amy meets her at a party too, but not one of Shane's.
(Amy has sworn off Shane parties for the foreseeable future, and by foreseeable, she pretty much means forever. Blame it on Rachel. Amy does.)
This party is a much swankier affair, the kind of thing Amy would never go to (or want to) on her own. But when it comes to her social life the last year or so, Amy has learned two very simple lessons.
She is never on her own. And Shane and Karma, despite not really liking each other, are a combined force of nature that no one could resist.
They made her come to this thing, both of them.
"Please?" Karma asked her and she asked it in that way that Amy knows, even after only a year of friendship (a year that has made Amy wonder how she ever lived without Karma), will get her to do virtually anything.
(Emphasis on the virtually because no matter how Karma begs or pleads or bats her eyes, Amy will never again drink one of her mother's smoothies.)
"I need you to go," Karma said. "Need. He's going to be there and so is Shane and you know how I get around Shane and you know how I get around him and if you're not there to help me…."
Amy gave in, at least in part, to shut Karma up. She loves her, really she does, and there are very few things she wouldn't do for her (see: drinking Molly's smoothies) but sometimes there are moments when Amy's so very grateful there was no spark. Best friend Karma is demanding enough.
Amy's sort of terrified at the thought of girlfriend Karma.
Shane was no less demanding and far less… requesting. "You're going," he said, in that way that Amy, after being friends with him for like forever, knows will get her to do absolutely nothing. Shane knows it too. But he also knows if he says it often enough (at least once an hour, every hour, including text message that wake Amy in the middle of the night) eventually she'll cave and do exactly what he wants.
Both of them, Karma and Shane, are invested in this thing because of, as Karma said, him.
'Him', Amy knows, is Liam, Shane's other best friend, the only other person who's known (read: tolerated) Shane as long as she has. And that, in a nutshell, describes Amy's relationship with him. Tolerance. It's not a friendship.
(They tried that once. Once.)
It's also not an active dislike. Liam isn't her cup of tea, but Amy can see the appeal. He's open minded (the first time she met him he was beating up a third grader who'd dared to call Shane a 'fag') and loyal (see: not ditching Shane when, seven years later, he picked a fight with that same, though much older and more muscular third grader, a fight Liam had to save him from) and, in an abstract sense, at least to Amy, good looking and charming.
Though, if guys like Liam are supposed to be the best of the best? Amy's really glad she's into girls. He has, lately, just rubbed her the totally wrong way.
And, of course, that's got nothing to do with the fact that Liam also happens to be the guy Karma is kinda, sorta, maybe seeing.
"We're not exclusive," Karma says. "I'm not even sure I like him. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don't." She nods the whole time, as if the answer to everything is 'yes'. "It's like the weather," she says. "Always changing."
Amy's mother is a meteorologist. She knows about the weather in Texas and, protestations and excuses notwithstanding, Karma and Liam are far more constant than the weather.
Sometimes she likes him. And sometimes she likes him.
Amy's never quite sure the 'like' is a mutual thing (she can't be bothered to spend that much time studying Liam Booker) but Karma's happy, usually, so Amy shrugs and tries to pretend that Liam having his hooks in both her best friends doesn't bother her. And it doesn't, not really, not usually.
Parties at the Booker mansion are not usually.
The party is some big deal for the Bookers. Amy's known him forever and she can count on one hand (with fingers left over) the number of times she's met any portion of his family other than the nanny or the driver. So, she gets that having such a public soiree and letting Liam invite his friends (read: Shane, the girl he kinda, maybe, sorta likes, and 'the other one') is a big deal.
It matters to Liam so it matters to Shane and to Karma and so, by the transitive property of giving a fuck, it matters to Amy.
There are times, more and more often lately, when Amy thinks she really needs a few more friends. Like maybe she should find someone at school to hang out with. Maybe join a band or something.
The whole thing, Bookers included, is not how Amy would like to be spending her Thursday afternoon (and really, who has fancy parties on a Thursday?) She feels out of place (she is), underdressed (again, she is) and she has the urge to disappear even more than usual. Shane and Karma are rocking their increasingly hostile frenemy thing (all about Liam and Amy can't help wondering why neither of them ever gets that possessive about her) and they both abandon her almost immediately upon arrival.
Amy snatches a couple of shrimp from a passing hors d'oeuvres tray and wonders why they both worked so hard to get her there.
The answer comes promptly at two p.m., just after Amy has found an empty couch in a corner of the emptiest room to perch on and she can't believe she didn't see it coming.
It's a fucking parade. A full on bevy (and she's never once thought she'd use the word 'bevy') of girls, some of them old enough to be considered, by Amy's fairly sheltered standards, as women and her two best friends are dropping them by, one after another.
Amy wonders if she can get a drink from one of the waiters. Or, at least, more shrimp.
Shane and Karma are desperate to pair her off, each for their own reasons. Karma wants someone to double date with (someone who isn't Shane) and finding Amy a girl would be the perfect solution.
Shane wants someone to make Karma jealous.
"She wants you," he says, repeatedly (every hour on the hour). "Karma is totally into you," he says. "She just doesn't know it yet."
Amy's seen Karma with Liam. Maybe Karma doesn't know what Karma being totally into someone looks like, but Amy does. And it doesn't look a thing like Karma looking at her.
Shane disagrees (read: not a surprise). "What you need to do," he says, "is find yourself a girl, especially if she's really, really hot." Shane knows Karma's insecurities and isn't above exploiting them at every opportunity. "The quickest way to get over someone - or to make someone realize they're not over you - is to get under someone else."
Amy has serious doubts about Shane's theory, not the least of which is that she's pretty sure (as sure as Amy ever is about anything) that she doesn't want Karma to be under her. Plus, Karma's not sure she's bi anymore (and Amy's not sure she ever was because, her own sexual confusion aside, she's pretty positive being bi isn't something you get over like a cold or a stomach bug).
She even tries to point out to Shane the most glaring flaw in his logic. "If she's so into me, why does she keep trying to fix me up with every girl she meets?"
(There was Suzanne, Grace, Remi, Becky, Alecia, Lizzy, and Laura.)
Shane was having none of that. "It's the three D's," he says. "Deflection, defense, and confusion."
"Confusion starts with a 'c'," Amy reminds him.
"Don't bother me with details," Shane says. "She wants you. I can tell. I can feel the sapphic energy and honey, you just need to let it happen."
And, since Amy is apparently somehow not 'letting it happen', Shane has decided to take matters into his own hands and so has Karma.
As if there's any way this can possibly end well.
Shane's first, meandering by and dropping an "Oh, that's where you got off to," on her (as if he hasn't known exactly where she's been the whole time) with a redhead named Ruby in tow.
She's twenty-two, a senior bio major (strike one) and, as Shane whispers to Amy, "single and ready to mingle. In your pants."
Ruby settles on the couch and Shane disappears and Amy silently vows to make him disappear the next time she sees him. She and Ruby make small talk, which for Amy is even smaller than usual, and mostly consists of Ruby rambling on about her spot on the softball team (strike two).
Amy plucks a couple more shrimp off a tray brought around by one of the cater-waiters. "You like shrimp?" Ruby asks and the crinkling of her nose and pursing of her lips in distaste tells Amy that she doesn't (strike three and, really, a deal breaker on it's own) and at least gives her an escape.
"Like them?" she asks. "I love them." Another waiter appears (or it could be the same one, Amy can't be sure, though this one is kinda cute but, no, busy here…) and Amy snatches a couple more shrimp from the tray, shoving two of them in her mouth while piling a small aquarium's worth of them on her napkin.
"My friends," she says, "call me Shrimp Girl." She smiles, a tiny bit of shrimp escaping slipping free onto chin.
Ruby makes an excuse about a phone call or a trip to the powder room or suddenly realizing she's totally straight (Amy's not sure which, she wasn't really listening) and leaves Amy to her shrimp.
Karma's up next. She foregoes the 'that's where you got off too' and instead she opts for the more classic "Amy! I've been looking everywhere for you. Look who I bumped into!" as if Amy and bachelorette number 2 (Sandee, with two 'e's) both don't know how planned this all was.
Amy has to give Karma credit, she actually stays for a few minutes, desperately trying to keep the conversation going (it doesn't), Amy from saying something stupid (she does, asking why the two 'e's, wasn't one 'y' good enough?), and the cater waiter from coming by with more shrimp (she does, and yes, it's the same one and yes, she is cute).
Sandee and her two 'e's make it just a little longer than Ruby, but by the time Amy has finished her second napkin full of shrimp, she's bailed and Karma is glaring at her best friend with the kind of look Amy usually reserves for when her mother forgets to pay the Netflix bill.
"What?" Amy says.
Karma huffs (the sound she actually makes is a 'huff') and storms off, either to find Liam (Amy hopes not) or to find her next possible match (Amy hopes not more).
Shane's up next, bachelorette number three coming with him. Bliss (and Amy almost chokes on a shrimp at the name), nineteen, a sophomore with a belly ring and a love of puppies.
She lasts through four shrimp.
Karma swings back around with bachelorette number four. Ella is cute, Amy will give Karma that much. She's eighteen, a freshman with no definite major yet and a sarcastic sense of humor Amy finds slightly (read: way more than slightly) attractive.
She side eyes Amy as she plucks a shrimp (just one, so, you know, there might be some interest here) from the tray. Amy offers her one but Ella shakes her head.
"I'm vegan," she says.
Amy pauses, her own shrimp half way to her lips. "Vegan," she says (and she tries really, really hard to not let the word sound as dirty as it feels). "One thing I've always wondered about," she says, "do vegans eat doughnuts?"
Ella frowns and Amy knows she's a goner before she even answers. "We can," she says. "If they're made right. You know, without the eggs and the dairy."
Strikes one, two, and three.
It goes on like this for a bit, the parade. There's Brooke, Perry, Jessica, Lisa, and Rachel (and yes, it's that Rachel and how the fuck did Shane forget Rachel?).
And then there's Stefanie, Natasha, Paige, and Amy (and yes again, Karma tried to fix up Amy with Amy) and there's tray after tray of shrimp and Amy's starting to feel like a flamingo (who have bills especially made for scooping up shrimp, a fact other Amy didn't find nearly as interesting as original Amy).
The whole thing is, actually, kind of fun and Amy has to admit that seeing Karma and Shane growing increasingly frustrated (she's pretty sure neither of them is speaking to her at this point) has made the whole party at least tolerable.
Until now. Until him.
Liam sits down next to her and Amy pauses in mid-chew to look around the room in confusion because there's no way he meant to sit with her, right?
"I think Shane's about ready to kill you," he says and so, maybe, he did mean it. "And Karma's just about to cry."
Amy swallows her last bite of shrimp and stares straight ahead. She and Liam have about one conversation a year and they had that last month at Karma's birthday dinner so this one's not due for like another three hundred some odd days.
"They can be a bit much, can't they?" he asks but he doesn't look at her and Amy's not sure she's actually supposed to answer so she doesn't. "But they mean well and it's all because they love you, so…"
Amy crumples her napkin in her hand. And then uncrumples it. And then crumples it again.
She's got nothing.
"Good intentions or not," Liam says, "if I were you I'd be just about over it all and, maybe, looking for an escape?" He doesn't wait for her to respond. "If you want to get out of here, my driver's waiting in the storage room just off the main hall."
He points discreetly (so discreetly Amy almost misses it because she's not used to discreet, she's used to Shane and Karma) down a hallway to their left.
"I can make your excuses if they ask," he says as he stands. "Of course, you're welcome to stay but -"
She's off the couch and down the hall so fast she forgets to thank him and she'll totally handle that the next time she sees him.
(No, she won't.)
The storage room (and she doesn't wonder for a second why the driver would be in a storage room) is easy to find and Amy quickly slips through the door except there's no driver, just lots and lots of things being… well… stored. Things like glasses and linens and bottles and bottles of champagne.
And one cater waiter. An admittedly cute one with no tray and no shrimp (not that Amy minds) but the best pair of…
Eyebrows!
That's totally what Amy was thinking. Best pair of eyebrows.
(Yeah. Right.)
She looks up from the bottles she's examining, and arches one of those brows (and Amy's heart climbs with it). "Hey… Shrimp Girl."
Amy has the sudden urge to down every bottle of champagne in the room, if only to un-dry her mouth and spare her the embarrassment of being 'Shrimp Girl'. (Even if the way it sounds coming out of her mouth might make Amy feel some kind of way…) "Hey…" she manages, her eyes darting around the room in search of the driver that she's rapidly starting to think isn't actually here.
The cater waiter (the admittedly cute one and now that Amy gets a really good look, cute isn't quite the word she'd use) (hot) (hot is the word) (hot is so the word) sets the bottle down and turns toward her, leaning against the crate of something or other behind her. "Finally get tired of all your girlfriends?"
Amy's confusion over the non-existent driver is replaced by the more pressing confusion over these 'girlfriends' (and, a little bit, by confusion over why she really doesn't want cute / hot cater waiter thinking she has girlfriends or even girlfriend). "What?" she asks.
Cute / hot cater waiter (and why can't she just be wearing a damn name tag?) grins at her and Amy feels a sense of relief wash over her even if she has no idea why. "All those girls your friends kept bringing by," she says. "You were more popular than the Bookers."
"Oh," Amy says. "Them. Yeah, they weren't… um… see… there are no… girlfriends...around me… right… now."
(Oh, for fuck's sake…)
"Really?" cute / hot (her new name) asks. "Their loss," she says. She plucks a couple bottles of champagne from the rack and sets them on her tray.
"Um… this is gonna sound really weird," Amy says (consciously choosing to ignore how weird 'there are no…' sounded moments before). "But I was supposed to be meeting a driver in here, so I could go home," she says. "You wouldn't happen to have seen one?"
Cute / hot shakes her head (and when she does a few strands of her hair, purple tipped at the ends, fall into her face and Amy seriously considers dropping the 'cute' from the name because the hot… damn… the hot). "Nope," she says. "Just me. Mr. Booker, the young one, just asked me to come in here and get a couple more bottles. Not that they need them. There's at least two dozen out there already."
Mr. Booker. The young one.
Liam. Liam fucking Booker.
"Well, I better get back out there," cute / hot says as she shuffles past Amy (maybe a little slower than necessary, unless Amy's imagining it). "See you around Shrimp Girl."
"Amy." She says it so fast it surprises even her but cute / hot stops next to her (right next to her) and looks at her in confusion. "I… um… sometimes also go by Amy," she says.
"Reagan," cute / hot… Reagan.. says.
Amy smiles and then, before she can stop herself (read: before she can freak out), "Can I get your number?" Reagan arches a brow again and Amy's afraid she's been too subtle (because that's her problem) so she doubles down. "So I can ask you on a date," she says. "I think we should go out sometime."
"You think so?" Reagan asks and there's just enough of a smile on her face and in her words that Amy knows she's not the only one thinking it. Reagan nods once and holds out her hand expectantly. "Phone?"
Amy digs her cell out of her tiny purse at something approaching the speed of light and hands it to Reagan who deftly enters her name and number one handed. She slips it back into Amy's purse and snaps it shut.
"Give me a call," Reagan says and she heads back out, leaving Amy standing there in the Booker's storage room, totally confused as to what the hell just happened and even more confused about who to talk to about it since Shane and Karma are both not speaking to her.
And most of that slips from her mind the moment she hears the door open behind her and turns just in time to see Reagan almost running back in and all of that absolutely vanishes from her mind when the other girl cradles her cheeks in her hands and kisses her.
It's softer than the kiss (kisses) with Karma and so much better than the one (the only one) with Rachel and that spark that wasn't there with Karma?
It's not there with Reagan either. There's no spark.
It's a fire. An inferno. A conflagration, a napalm blast on top of TNT on top of C-4 on top of the big fucking bang and oh my God this is a kiss.
Reagan pulls back, biting her lip nervously and staring at Amy. "I… um… in case you were thinking about not calling or, you know, might have maybe chickened out -"
Amy cuts her off with another kiss (and what is it about her and kissing girls in mid-sentence?) and it doesn't last as long as the first because there's a commotion in the hall and Reagan pulls back so as to not get caught making out with a guest.
"I guess that means you'll call?" she asks and Amy nods. "Cool." There's more noise in the hall and Reagan heads for the door. "I'll talk to you soon, Shrimp Girl."
Amy nods even though Reagan's already out the door and she just stands there for a minute, grinning to herself.
The party she never wanted to go to got her a tummy full of shrimp, a date, and two kisses.
Booker parties rule.