DISCLAIMER: Not mine. I can't say it more clearly than that.
A/N: This is from Max's POV now. While writing it, I soon realized that a lot of it revolves around guilt and a difficulty in accepting who she is.
Poor Max.
A
Accept – So what if she'd accepted that she was some kind of Messiah created in a lab for the sole purpose of saving the human race…didn't mean she had to like it.
B
Ben – She could never really be sure she did right by him, so she could never really forgive herself for killing him.
C
Cocktail – Manticore must have screwed up her genetic cocktail, because she always felt like such a mess inside.
D
Darkness – No matter how hard she tried, there would always be a little bit of darkness in her. It was just how she was built.
E
Escape and Evade – She'd always been the best at it, especially when it came to emotional entanglements.
F
Freak Nation – She didn't know how she became the leader of a Freak Nation, and she'd be damned before she told anyone how scared she really was.
G
Guns – She'd sworn them off a long time ago, but she could still assemble one in under five seconds with her eyes closed. Old habits die hard.
H
Heart – Zack had given her his heart so she wouldn't die; she just wished she knew how to live with that.
I
Incurable – What if the virus was incurable? Some days, she secretly wished it were.
J
Justice – If there was any justice in the world, she'd never stop seeing Ben in Alec's face; but then again, justice had never been on her side.
K
Kindness – She would always remember kindness as a woman named Hannah, a fire in a small cottage, and feeling warm for the first time in her life.
L
Loyalty – Was that the only reason she stuck around with Logan for so long? Could she live with that?
M
Mistake – She'd told Alec that kissing him had been the biggest mistake of her life.
N
Numb – Then she'd just gone cold and numb inside after he walked out and slammed the door behind him.
O
O'Niner – It wasn't like she'd had a choice; but she would always be one of those who ran away.
P
Pray – She didn't know if there was a God, or if Ben's Blue Lady was real or not, but sometimes, she wished she knew how to pray.
Q
Queen Bitch – She'd heard herself referred to as the Queen Bitch; that was just fine with her—it stopped everyone from asking her how she really felt.
R
Reality – She'd dreamed of belonging and being accepted; in reality she already had a place to belong—only, she was having a hard time accepting it.
S
Safe – Even if they were in a dump like Terminal City in the middle of a Siege, it was the safest she had ever felt in her whole life.
T
Trust – Not that she'd ever really say it out loud, but Alec was the only one she trusted with her…everything.
U
Universe – Even if they weren't meant to exist in the first place, they were all here, and they were all here to stay. The rest of the universe would just have to live with that.
V
Vacation – Sometimes, she really wanted a vacation from being the Lady Jesus Messiah of a Freak Nation.
W
Weakness – Emotions were weakness; Alec made her feel emotions. He made her weak…especially when he made her cry.
X
X-Series – They were supposed to be better than humans, but then how come she sometimes found herself wishing so hard she was just one of them?
Y
Yes – Yes, she woke up every morning wondering if she would make it through the day.
Z
Zap – If there was an invention that could just zap all her problems away just like that, she'd be all over it in a second…but then again, she kinda liked being a cat burglar.
A/N: Now you know your ABC's! Again!