Raven took the Rilke book of romantic poetry and went back to her room. She read it from cover to cover, partly because she liked it so much. She nearly got a tingly feeling from the amorous sentiment of it. But it was partly to put her in the mood for romantic pursuit.

It simply wasn't something she'd done. She never went to a regular school like some of the other Titans. She never went through that whole social whirl of pursuing and being pursued. This was going to be something completely new. She sighed, determined as ever, and worked her hips down into the thick covers of her bed.

Herald.

She let herself zone out just thinking of him.

He was very good looking. She wasn't sure if he was smart but at least he didn't seem dumb. And he had . . . but he didn't do anything to accentuate it. She liked this a lot. Some hero boys, like Kid Flash, had to wear pretty revealing uniforms. But Herald didn't have to and he didn't. If Speedy was as well endowned he'd have made a bedazzled codpiece a part of his uniform.

But, what's the way to snag him? She pondered this for a long time. Then it occurred to her to look to other examples. How had the others gotten together? Of course! There had to be some patterns, some lesson for how to get together with a hero boy. But, as she thought about all of them, this feeling of elation, just do what they had done, quickly collapsed into disappointment. There were no road maps there at all. At least, none that she could follow.

Argent had gone out with Herald but she'd met him at one of the annual Titans Tower parties. The next one wasn't for another few months. Beast Boy had fallen in love with Terra but she'd been playing him, at least initially, for Slade. And what the hell had drawn him to her anyway? Was it because she was blonde?

She wasn't about to do blonde but she didn't have to. Herald had already dated Argent and she was a chalk skinned sorceress with oddly colored hair. So, it wasn't like he was only looking for some standard issue peroxide princess.

There was Jinx and Kid Flash but he'd completely been the pursuer there and the way he described their first encounter he was just crazy for her looks and loved that she was really smart. Raven wasn't about to knock over a museum in the city where Herald patrolled just to get his attention.

The pace of Robin finally getting to a kiss with Starfire had been glacial. She could not wait for that. It would be years before she ever saw that rumored epic organ. Captain Marvel Junior and Mary Marvel had always been around each other and probably always seemed destined for one another. It was like a boy and girl who grew up down the street from each other getting together. It was always going to happen. But she didn't have that association with Herald.

And Raven sighed at the thought of destiny. What did it really mean, anyway? What were all those prophecies from Azareth worth? They'd told her that she was going to be the means by which her father took over the earth and yet the Titans had beaten him.

Of course, she breathed in slowly, there had been that . . . other prophecy, too.

She'd just turned 12 and had learned of another book of prophecies, not the 5,000 page, three foot wide book that they had two attendants open for you and that concerned the fates of worlds and which had foretold that she would be Trigon's means of taking the earth.

The book of Sifra. The closest translation to english of Sifra was love. Only Sifra was a very specific subset of love, deep and abiding affection between a man and a woman. But you couldn't just read what the book of Sifra said about you. It was what they called an "ephemeral tome".

You went to a low marble building near the edge of a cliff overlooking an ocean bay. It was a beautiful setting somehow always with a soft breeze. The air was filled with hyacinth and lavender and an oracle, a woman with long, flowing purple hair in a gauzy white robe instructed you where to stand and how to touch the book. It was just a normal sized book with an ornate leather cover but all the pages were empty. She directed you where to stand on a precise spot a bit to the side of being directly behind the stand and how to put your near hand on the book's binding and the incantation to pronounce. You were supposed to think "loving thoughts". That's all she told you. Loving thoughts.

And then the history of your affection, that's how the oracle said it, the history of your affection will be written in the book. Raven did as she was told and then the Oracle opened the book and it was full of text, ornate cursive writing in old Uru, the language of the book's original makers.

Raven was fascinated as the Oracle slowly let the pages slip past her thumb. "What does it say?" she asked anxiously.

The Oracle was as placid as she'd been since Raven had entered. "It says you will know great love. But you will have . . . false steps at first. Hmmm." Pages slipped between her fingers. "Yes . . . hmm . . . Such is the way of love. You will not be . . . satisfied by earth boys. You will -"

And then, abruptly, the damn high priestess had called to the Oracle from the entrance to the building and the Oracle let the pages go and the book close as she walked away leaving Raven. Raven had pulled her hand from the binding and had watched the Oracle depart the room. As soon as she was out of sight, Raven quickly opened the book again. She knew some Uru. She figured she could remember what she saw and then translate whatever parts she didn't understand right away.

But when she opened the book again to the pages where the Oracle had stopped they were all blank again. She thumbed quickly through the book. Every page of the damn book was blank. She looked over her shoulder. The Oracle was just beyond the doorway talking to the high priestess and had completely forgotten her. Raven tried to repeat the incantation herself with her hand on the binding again, thumb . . here, was it? Fingers . . there? Amorous thoughts. But when she opened the book the pages were still blank.

Another student came in and the Oracle shooed her out.

Raven sighed thinking of it. ". . you will know great love". And maybe Herald didn't really count as just an "earth boy" since he had a special power. None of the Titan boys would except for Robin and Speedy but they weren't possibilities anyway.

But the way she'd said it, "You will not be . . . ". Pause. " . . . satisfied by earth boys"! And that slight smile, almost smirk as she'd said it. Did that mean . . .? Did oracles actually think racy thoughts? Had the prophecy foretold that she needed more than guys like Speedy and Aqualad, guys with serious equipment but still not nearly enough for her?

Gods, does the whole magic community know that I need it as big as I can get it?

Raven finally fell asleep.

The next day, getting tea and lingonberry bread, she bumped into Jinx and Kid Flash in the Tower kitchen. He had rushed up to her and they locked into a deep kiss for what Raven's jealousy made seem like an hour but was probably actually less than half a minute. He separated. "I'll be back as soon as Flash lets me," he whispered but Raven could hear it. He then sped off, just a whisp of red and yellow color and gone.

A few seconds passed.

"Want some?" asked Raven, pointing to the bread, razor sharp knife at the ready.

"Lingonberry? Sure. Toasted?"

Raven gave an "of course" nod.

"And some of that ocular fluid jam that Star just got?" Raven smiled and Jinx echoed it. The stuff totally creeped out the boys but it was soooooooo good.

The two settled into the leather banquet table right beside each other both thumbing through fan mails. Despite their earlier status as the bitterest of enemies, each would have quickly cited the other as the Titan around whom they felt most comfortable, outside of spousal relations.

Raven carefully watched Jinx. The pink haired sorceress did not like adhering to Robin's rule about an average half hour a day to answer or, at least, sort fan mail. Robin had wanted them all to answer every piece of fan mail which was nuts. Beast Boy, got more than a thousand emails or physical letters a week. The torrent of it had slowed down a bit just before his growth spurt but when he suddenly shot up to just over six feet tall with a face and body fit for the runway the fangirls had gone nuts. Gar objected on practical terms as did most of the others. The only one who'd thought it was okay was Kid Flash, who could type thousands of words a minute allowing him to respond to all the Flinx adulation if he wanted to.

Robin had backed off to "answer or at least sort" their fan mail for an average of a half hour a day. Jinx and Raven had both decided that scrolling past a message was sorting and could dispatch hundreds of them in a half hour. Their fan mail program was set to send back a standard response.

Jinx thanks you for your communication but she gets so many messages each day and the time demands of saving lives are so great that she regrets that she can't respond personally to this message.

As soon as she scrolled past a message on her communicator this standard message or one of five others would go out in response.

Occasionally, Jinx would stop and read a message through and write a long response. Just as Raven seemed to get all the goth girls, Jinx got all the correspondence from a certain kind of proto-feminist girl. And just as Raven would sometimes send back harsh messages, Jinx would reply with long messages to girls who tried to identify their life choices with whatever it was that they thought was Jinx's image.

The purple haired sorceress discreetly watched her pink haired counterpart thumbing out the last lines of a very long response to one.

" . . hating boys does not make u a feminist. And that's not what I'm about. I used to be about proving my worth by showing other peoples' lack of worth, too. Well it doesn't work. And, really being independent means not caring what other people think, not desperately shoving it in their faces all the time to get their reactions. That's almost as dependent as doing things just for their approval. Be your damn self.

Jinx"

Send.

Jinx sighed and leaned back on the leather of the banquet seating.

"Tough fan mail?" muttered Raven pretending to just now take notice of Jinx's responding.

The pink haired Titan sighed with her eyes closed and head tilted back. "They say these dumb things and tell me that they learned them from me or they're doing them for me or because of me? Is there anything worse than something stupid and that you disagree with being done in your name?! Aaarrrggghhh!"

"Tell me about it. If one more goth girl thanks me for inspiring her to all her stupid crap, I'll scream, too. I didn't tell you to bathe in some weird chemical to color your skin light gray!"

Raven let a decent interval pass. Jinx was still facing the ceiling closed eyed.

"Does Wally have any trouble like this?"

Jinx chuckled as she opened her eyes and turned to Raven. "What's weird is how normal they all see him as. He's as much a freak as any of us."

"Mmm."

"But he and Flash somehow have this-this . . everyman sort of vibe at least that's how the general public seems to see it and they really love Flash for it in Keystone City but it doesn't get Wally a lot of fan mail. I mean, what does he represent? Seriously. Some of them think that I'm, that I'm feminism and you're goth and Cyborg is tech and Star is girly girl and now Gar is a pretty boy and Robin is over the top determination but what is he? The outside world doesn't realize what a nerd he is so he's not a symbol for that, though he could be. He's no symbol in particular so gets like 25% of the fan mail that I get, if that much. And he responds to way more than I do what with . . " Jinx moved her fingers in the air in a pantomime of typing as fast as she could.

"For a while there, I was really jealous of you for how lucky you were that he pursued you."

Jinx rolled her eyes.

"What?" asked Raven, genuinely puzzled.

"That sounded a bit like what the guys think. Every girl knows better. I could have escaped his pursuit if I'd really wanted to. At any time. But it was . . fun to sort of spar with him at first. And he's just the sort of slender boy that's really easy on the eyes. Those buns!"

"Mmm!"

"And he's smart and he has such a good heart."

"Mmm."

Raven nodded. "So . . . how did you . . . control the pursuit?"

Jinx shrugged. "Are you kidding? I was smart about it. I-"

"Jinx. Rae."

Six foot tall Beast Boy breezed past them nodding to each on the way to the giant Tower refrigerator.

Raven stared at him through gritted teeth. Stupid Gar! She took a moment to compose herself and then turned back to Jinx. She was about to ask her to continue in a whisper, so that a certain green party didn't hear. But he kept talking to them over his shoulder even as he was bent over at the waist with his back to them.

"So, Jinx. Was that Wally speeding off just a few minutes ago?"

"Yeah, a helping out Flash sort of thing."

"Somehow, I don't get those requests from Mento," said Gar now withdrawing a bowl of blueberries and strawberries and, ignoring Raven's silent mental screams, go away, go away, then sitting down at the banquet table next to Jinx and almost opposite Raven.

"Don't you have some kind of male fashion model thing to go to?" Raven implored.

Beast Boy shook his head. "Got a photo shoot in a couple days," he said plucking a few blueberries from the bowl and popping them into his mouth. "Another ad for that car company."

"Green can be beautiful," smiled Jinx.

"It can also be #$&," muttered Raven.

"What's that, Rae?" asked Gar smiling extra wide at her. He turned to Jinx offering her berries from the bowl. "Want some?"

She took a few with a smile.

"Anyway," he continued, "I wish I'd had a mentor like that. Have you ever spent any time with Flash, Rae?"

"No I haven't, Gar."

"He's great!" gushed Jinx and to Raven's exasperation, Jinx and Beast Boy spent the next several minutes telling stories about what a super nerd and super nice guy Flash is and how lucky Wally was to have him as a mentor. Raven didn't mind the discussion. She just didn't want it now. She wanted to get back to asking Jinx how she'd snagged Kid Flash. What was she so smart about? What did she do?

But to Raven's displeasure, Jinx turned her focus to Beast Boy and their mutual appreciation of Flash. Fine, some of Beast Boy's observations about Flash and his relationship with Kid Flash and the failings of his own relationship with Mento were much more mature than she would have ever expected but did he have to get into it right then? He'd had years to act mature. He has to now? Now?! He couldn't have been an annoying brat 5 minutes longer?! Shouldn't he be satisfied with having turned into such an outrageous pretty boy?!

The conversation between Jinx and Beast Boy was only broken up by the arrival of the three other Titans. For the rest of the day, between training sessions and answering inquiries from the Justice League about minor villains who'd spent some time using Jump City as a base, Raven was never alone with Jinx to ask her to finish what she'd started to say.

To make the whole situation even more exasperating to Raven, all the other Titans were laughing and enjoying Gar in his new favorite shape, a bull. He went through phases, sometimes a week or two, sometimes a couple months, where he would spend a lot of his free time in the form of one or another animal. For a while it had been a hyperactive Weimaraner breed dog. Then, for a few months, he'd made himself into a spider monkey. For one winter it had been a polar bear then an ape, a velociraptor, stallion, kangaroo, eagle, leopard and lion.

He gave Star a ride down the hall on his broad bull's back right up to where Robin was sitting at the communications desk.

"Please, Robin! Haven't you researched enough of the possible whereabouts of these villains for the Justice League?"

"Just a little more, Star," said Robin without ever looking away from the screen with its list of the top 500 energy users in metro Jump City.

Beast Boy the bull crept up behind Robin and breathed heavily on his bare neck.
"Please Star. Save it for later. I'm just as horny as you are," he muttered.

Beast Boy lapped at the boy wonder's bare neck with his huge bull tongue. Watching from 20 feet away and to one side, the others could see Robin smile slightly, still locked onto the data on the screen. "Oh yeah, Star. I want that, too," only to hear the uproarious laughter of the other Titans which followed and ,when he spun around on the chair, by Beast Boy licking his face from chin to forehead with his giant, drooling bull's tongue.

"Beast Boy!"

Robin chased after him but the changeling went from one shape to another to beat Robin to the stairway door then go under it as an insect then fly down the stairwell as a bird leaving the boy wonder far behind, all of it accompanied by the falling down laughter of the rest of the team.

Even Raven had laughed, still smiling as she made her way back to her room later that night. It couldn't be denied that Gar was useful in puncturing Robin's attitude of incessant fixation on crime fighting. It was too bad that he wasn't a bit more like this earlier instead of being so annoying. Before she started meditating, it occurred to her that it might have been a bit unfair to him that, when the team had formed, he'd been a 13 year old mixed in with 15 and 16 year olds and judged by their standards.

When her meditation session was finally over, hours later, Raven considered her Herald problem some more. She did a little searching on line for Mal and his jazz playing. She decided she would know the music that he played better than anyone else. For the next several hours, she played some of the recordings he'd made, covers of Herbie Hancock, Miles Davis and others. She'd never really paid attention to jazz music before but this was nice. She liked this. There was a smart melody to most all of it and it was a sophisticated sound. She smiled atop her covers letting her senses soak in the work of Mal Duncan.