I don't own 'The Hobbit', and I never will. Enjoy!
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Bilbo yawned and stretched as he opened his eyes, not really focusing on anything. What a weird dream he had. He had been turned into a fairy by Yavanna, and Thorin, his Thorin, had turned up minutes later, sent back by Mahal so they could help each other on the quest to Erebor.
"Bilbo?"
Never mind, there was Thorin now. The dwarf had several pieces of what Bilbo assumed was his new clothes, but with all the fabric scraps around, the hobbit-fairy couldn't be sure. Thorin stood and stretched while flexing his hands, as if to get any feeling besides pins and needles back into them. A quick glance out the window told Bilbo it was only mid-day or so. Guess his transformation and breakdown had worn him out more than he realized.
Suddenly, Bilbo was angry. Angry that Thorin had thought so little of him without getting to know him, irritated at all the times the dwarf had talked down on him, and he was especially mad that the son of Mahal gone and died on him, leaving him to suffer with a broken heart for over 90 years and having to give their child away.
"Bilbo?" Thorin knelt next to the pillow Bilbo was resting on. "Are you okay?"
Bilbo didn't reply. He just got to his feet, jumped onto Thorin's shoulder, leaving the handkerchief behind, grabbed the braid that was hanging in front of the dwarf's left ear, and yanked on it as hard as he could.
"AIY!" Thorin yelped at the sudden sting, his face twisting to one of pain.
"How dare you!" Bilbo hissed, tugging on the braid as often as he could. "How dare you leave me all alone, with no one to help me recover from the aftermath of the battle. How dare you waltz back into my life, after 90 years of emptiness. How dare you act as if nothing is wrong! How dare you, you…"
Bilbo let go of the braid and collapsed into a crying fit on Thorin's shoulder again, his wings twitching and his whole body shaking as he sobbed. Thorin's black mane fell over Bilbo's right shoulder, and the handkerchief covered his lower body again with Thorin's hand covering the handkerchief, supporting the small hobbit-fairy as he wept. The dwarf's thumb slipped between the hobbit-fairy's shoulder blades, and wings, to gently attempt to soothe his distraught companion.
Slowly, Bilbo's weeping subsided to soft sniffles. He still shivered a little bit, but felt a better since he had gotten around 90 years of hurt and anger mostly taken care of with his little temper tantrum. Pulling away, Bilbo wiped his eyes clear of tears and looked back up to Thorin's face. The dwarf had a tortured expression on his face, but it was quickly moved aside in favor of looking concerned and worried about the hobbit-fairy in his hands.
"Better?" Thorin whispered.
"Yeah." Bilbo sighed, and the dwarf gently lowered his hand so Bilbo, and the handkerchief, could slide back onto his pillow. "I'm sorry."
"You are well within your rights to be angry at me." Thorin replied, still rubbing his thumb between Bilbo's shoulder blades. "If you want, you could demand my braids as compensation for what I did."
"No." Bilbo shook his head. "How would you explain that to your kin? 'Hey everyone, guess what? I went gold mad and nearly started a war while attempting to kill the only hobbit with common sense at Erebor, said hobbit pregnant with my child!' I don't think it go over so well."
"Well, when you put it that way…" Thorin had to concede.
"And I forgave you." Bilbo continued, making the dwarf look at him. "It took 20 years of cursing all things under the sun, many bouts of weeping, and strong, (along with very sudden), temper tantrums after your death, but I forgave you."
Thorin let out the breath he hadn't ever realized he had been holding. Truly, this small creature before him, (no pun intended, even though he was smaller than the last time they had met), was more honorable then he had ever realized. A small smile came to Thorin's face, and it was mimicked back to him by Bilbo.
And then Bilbo's stomach rumbled.
"Again?" Thorin's eyebrows shot up.
"May I remind you my stomach is about the size of a large blueberry right now?" Bilbo replied with a flat look. "I'm going to get hungry quicker when I'm this small."
"Let's get you some more food then." Thorin responded. "But first…"
Bilbo's curiosity was spiked as Thorin reached for the small end table at the end of the couch and grabbed one of the small piles of what wasn't scrap, but the new clothes he had made. The dwarf laid the items out for the hobbit to see, and Bilbo found himself grinning at the sight of new outfits, even some undergarments.
There were no buttons on either of the shirts Thorin had made, (which made sense because all of the buttons that Bilbo had were all too big now). One of the shirts was red, had long sleeves, and had a rectangle shaped hole in the back for his wings. The other top was dark blue, had no sleeves, tied at the base of his neck, and the back shirt line came up to a touch below his wings. A halter top, Bilbo's mind supplied. One pair of pants was brown and the other black, but both would come to his mid-calf. And there even was a small strap of leather to use as a belt.
"Thanks." Bilbo nodded to Thorin before diving under the hankie with his new garments.
Thorin didn't have to wait long. Bilbo came out in the dark blue shirt and black pants, and had an expectant look on his face. Thorin blinked, and then figured it out. He lowered his hand for Bilbo to climb on, and they both went into the pantry for Bilbo to pick out his food.
"When do you want to go to the Took's?" Thorin asked, munching on some turkey and apple slices.
"Hmm." Bilbo hummed as he ate his own bits of turkey. "You said that after you woke up in Middle-Earth again, you came here as fast as you could, right?"
"Yes…" Thorin nodded, not quite sure what Bilbo was getting at.
"Dawn tomorrow, or the next day." Bilbo replied. "Your pony needs to rest after such a long trek."
"I will have you know that dwarf ponies are much tougher then you actually believe them to be." Thorin scowled.
"Right." Bilbo smirked. "That's why they bolt whenever the wargs howl."
Thorin grumbled and huffed at Bilbo's pony's bolting comment, mumbling something about the trolls already having them spooked. Bilbo snickered at Thorin's huffiness. It was just too funny.
"You need a bath." Bilbo announced quite suddenly.
Thorin paused in his grumbles and looked at the hobbit-fairy with wide eyes. While he had no qualms about being in his bare skin around others, Bilbo had been a bit more… modest, was the polite term. It had taken ages on their journey for the hobbit to stop blushing and stuttering every single time one of the dwarves even took off their shirts for a sparring session, much less when they went skinny dipping in a nearby stream.
"You stink Thorin, there's no two ways around it." Bilbo crossed his arms at the blank look on his dwarf's face.
"Very well." Thorin sighed, and offered his hand to the small hobbit, who immediately hopped on, taking the last of his strawberry with him.
Finding the bathroom was easy since Thorin had accessed it a few times that day, and he had to admit, he was impress by the plumbing in this place. Bilbo's father, Bungo Baggins, had known what he was doing when he hired a dwarf to lay the plumbing out in the smial he had built for his fiancée-and-soon-to-be-wife, Belladonna Took. Fiancé
Thorin let Bilbo off at the counter and began to fill the tub with water. The dwarf began for the necessary soaps and hair products, finding them in a different cupboard then the one Bilbo was on. When he turned back to the tub, it was to find that it was nearly overflowing. Shutting off the water, Thorin began to strip his clothes.
"Um, Th-Thorin?" Bilbo stuttered out, making the dwarf chuckle.
"Bilbo, you're still not going on about 'modest and respectable behavior', are you?" Thorin asked as he looked over to the counter.
Only to discover that Bilbo wasn't there anymore. Looking around franticly, Thorin found that Bilbo's wings had pulled him off of the countertop and had him floating over the filled tub. And then the hovering stopped.
Bilbo screamed bloody murder as he dropped into the tub. If he was his normal size, it wouldn't have been a problem, but the bathtub was now an ocean to the poor hobbit-fairy with little-to-no swimming skills. That had been quite a shock to find out from the sick hobbit during their stay in Laketown after traveling in, or on, barrels to escape from the Elvenking Thranduil, and the orc pack that had been waiting to ambush them.
Thorin threw himself to the edge of the bathtub and quickly spotted Bilbo's wiggling outline under the water. Thrusting his arms down, he got his hands under and around Bilbo, and pulled him out. The poor hobbit-fairy coughed up the water that was in his lungs while clutching tightly to the dwarf's fingers and thumbs.
"You're just having bad luck with these things, aren't you?" Thorin sighed as he eyed the wings, which were still rather pristine and crisp looking*.
"The Took's better have a book with flying instructions." Bilbo moaned as he finished hacking out a lungful of water.
The rest of the bath was uneventful. The only thing that did happen was Bilbo braving the deep water in the bathtub, (it was deep to him!), to curl up on Thorin's hairy chest, over his heart, after the dwarf was done cleaning himself. He needed some type of comfort, and Thorin was the best comfort that he could receive.
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Bilbo and Thorin departed mid-morning the next day after Thorin tacked a note to the door. It had taken Bilbo a long while to write out, but it was to let his Baggins relatives know he was going to see his mother's family for a couple of weeks. Neither of them knew exactly how long it would take to reach Tuckborough, but Bilbo guessed it would take a couple of days. They wanted to visit the Took's and be back by April 26th, when Gandalf would knock on Bilbo's door in search of a burglar.
"How are we going to do this?" Bilbo asked.
"What do you mean?" Thorin questioned from where he was finishing loading his saddle bags on to his pony, who had been named after Bilbo's father, Bungo, last lifetime.
"I would rather not have my kin pointing and gawking at me for two or three days on our way to my mother's family." Bilbo explained. "So… where am I going to ride?"
"Top of a saddlebag?" Thorin offered.
"Smells like smelly dwarf feet, no thanks."
"Bungo's mane?"
"I don't have that good of a grip, and my wings cause trouble."
"… One of my shirt pockets?"
"Dwarf body odor, no."
"Then I won't offer a coat pocket."
"Same as shirt pocket, rejected."
"I guess you could hide under my hair, on my shoulder."
Bilbo paused. Touching a dwarf's hair was considered a big no-no, unless you were close family or friends. It was a huge sign of trust, one that Bilbo thought wouldn't be allowed to him after his yanking Thorin's braids last night.
"If that's alright with you." Bilbo whispered softly, blushing and looking at his feet.
"I wouldn't have offered if it wasn't." Thorin replied just as soft, and offered his hand for the hobbit-fairy to climb on.
Bilbo climbed up, and the dwarf brought his hand up to his left shoulder again. This time, Bilbo climbed off, scrambled up the warg-fur lined coat, and perched himself on Thorin's shoulder. He could easily pull Thorin's hair over him to hide himself, and he wouldn't suffocate on the stench of smelly dwarf feet or body odor.
"AIY!" Bilbo yelped as Thorin mounted, one hand clutching the collar of his coat and the other the dwarf's raven black hair.
"Off we go then." Thorin commented cheerfully as he spurred Bungo down the dirt lane.
"Only you would be cheerful about riding a pony for days on end." Bilbo grumbled.
"At least you won't have saddle sores this time around." Thorin pointed out.
"Eh, true." Bilbo had to concede.
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The Tuckborough Family Smials were huge! Many of the Took family tended to live close together, and so it seemed like the rolling hillsides were one enormous hobbit home. In fact, as Bilbo explained, they actually were due to the tunnel systems under the homes that had been dug after the Fell Winter so they could have easy access to the rest of their family's homes in case of an emergency.
"Do you believe we will meet with the Thain?" Thorin asked as he eyed the smials.
"Most likely." Bilbo replied. "The Thain is also the head of the Took family, typically."
"So you're related somehow?" Thorin questioned, getting an uncomfortable look on his face.
"Fortinbras II, my cousin and the firstborn son of my mother's third brother." Bilbo nodded. "Grandfather Gerontius was the Thain prior to him, along with our Uncle Isengrim III, first-born, and his father, my uncle, Isumbras IV, third-born. My Aunt Hildigard, second-born, died very young. My mother was the ninth-born and grandfather's second daughter."
"Then you're a prince." Thorin groaned.
This day just kept getting better and better. He had taken on of the Shire's princes off to face a dragon and hadn't informed their royal family. In fact, why hadn't Gandalf told him? He was bound to have known. Bilbo's mouth opened, no doubt to protest that he was not royalty, and then paused.
The Thain was seen as the leader of the Shire, and it was a hereditary position that typically went to the firstborn son. There were some exceptions, such as if the firstborn had died, had no children, or even had no desire to be the Thain, then it could pass on to the second or even third born son. A female could hold the position of the Thain, (such had been the case with the Old Took's mother after his father had died, since he had been a tad young and wild).
Many had believed once believed that Belladonna Took would have passed her older brothers, and succeeded her father as the Thain. That is, many believed it would be so if her desire to wander, and then later court and marry Bungo Baggins, had not dominated much of her life. But she venomously denied every wanting to be the Thain to the one idiot who had brought it up at her wedding.
"I suppose that the other races it would see it that way." Bilbo admitted. "But I'm not about to become the Thain anytime soon. We would have to get through five of my mother's older brothers, (Uncle Isengrim passed away last year and had no children), and all their broods before I would even be considered."
"You're still apart of the hobbit royal family." Thorin moaned. "What was Gandalf thinking, dragging another member of royalty along, and without alerting your family?"
"Who knows what that wizard thinks." Bilbo sighed, tugging the dwarf's braid to get his attention. "But you must remember, Thorin, there are three leaders in the Shire."
"Three?" Thorin repeated.
"The Thain is in charge of the West Farthing and our Bounders, that's our military. The Thain is the one most will go to for guidance and council, and holds the most power in terms of political authority." Bilbo recited. "And if I recall correctly, during our wandering days of the Second Age, the hobbits appointed a Thain instead of a King. The other two positions came later, after we settled in the Shire.
"There is the Master of Buckland, he usually keeps an eye on the East Farthing and old forest. He sends word to the Thain to call our bounders into action if wolves or some other ilk gets past the Dúnedain Rangers and into the Shire. And then there is the Mayor**, which is our only elected position. He really doesn't do much, mostly dissolves petty quarrels about a pig eating a neighbors flowers and the flower's owner demanding compensation."
"Sounds like my life split into three different people." Thorin commented dryly as he reigned in Bungo while some little children ran across the path, Bilbo ducking under his hair again. "Must be easier."
"I suppose it is." Bilbo replied. "Take a right here. We're almost there."
"Don't think I'm forgetting that you're royalty." Thorin huffed as he guided Bungo down a well trampled path.
"Stuff it." Bilbo shot back.
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*If any of you have seen anything from the Disney Fairy universe, Bilbo's wings are not like theirs. He can still fly when his are wet, though not as good as when they're dry, (like a bird). They also do not risk breakage in extreme hot or extreme cold. However, if someone handles them wrong, or sharply pulls at them, they can break, and they do not re-grow.
**Why yes, I did divide the Mayor's duties between the Thain and the Master of Buckland. In my eyes, those two positions have been around longer, and therefore are positions of more power. They Mayor has been simmered down to what I wrote in the chapter.
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Timeline
April 14th, year 2931: Bilbo yells at Thorin and the two take a bath after calming down.
April 15th, year 2931: Depart for Tuckborough.
April 17th, year 2931: Arrive in Tuckborough.