Intertwined Destinies

It was frightening how fast things can change. How all in one night the life she spent so long wishing to be free of, the life she often dreamt of escaping, would be the life she yearned for so completely it hurt.

It was gone now. All of it.

Had she the luxury Elissa Cousland would not move. She would just stop. Not do anything but scream and cry for everything she's lost. For the family she would never see again. For the home forever tainted by a betrayal that burned so deep she felt the very last remnants of her childhood shatter with a cry for vengeance so profound it absolutely refused to go unheeded.

As if sensing her distress her Mabari Dog gently nudged her with his muzzle. Distractedly she reached down to gently pet him, his attempt at comfort doing very little to ease the turmoil threatening to tear her apart. Even now it haunted her. The sight of her father's broken body, of Oren and Oriana drenched in a pool of their own blood, of her mother standing before them – bow at the ready as she braced herself for a battle she knew she could not win. A battle she was determined to fight in order to defend their father and buy both her and brother enough time to escape. To leave with the Grey Warden Duncan before Howe's men could even think to follow them.

It killed her to go, to run away while everyone she ever loved and cared for perished, but in the end that was exactly what she did. What they both did.

Overcome by the weight of her own guilt she came to an abrupt stop. Before she knew what was happening she found herself bent over, stomach turning violently as she threw up what little still remained in her.

"Are you okay? Do you need to rest?" her brother Aedan quickly asked – the worry clear in his tone.

Wiping away the sick from her mouth she turned on him. Like a dam she felt something inside her break.

"We shouldn't have left them," she found herself saying, her eyes filling with the tears she'd so far been able to keep at bay. "We should have stayed with them. We should-"

"And what? Allow ourselves to be captured? To be killed or even worst be kept alive to suffer in the hands of our captors?" Aedan bit back fiercely. He closed the distance between them, griping her arms tightly as his face twisted with the grief she only knew too well. "There was nothing we could have done Elissa. Father was right. He would not have made it past the strain of standing. We could not have taken him with us… and mother…"

He trailed off, his eyes filling with the tears he only barely managed to blink away.

"Mother made her choice," he choked out, voice shaky with emotion. "She chose to remain with father. She chose to stay so that we may live. She made her choice Elissa and now we must live with ours."

"I know," she cried helplessly. "I know. It's just… they are all dead Aedan. Everything we have ever known is gone. What do we do now? How do we go on?"

"We are Couslands sister," he reminded her in a tone so reminisce of their father she wanted to cry. "We will not be defeated by this. We will carry on. We will do our duty by joining the Grey Wardens and defeating the darkspawn. We will do what Howe would see fit to deny us. We will live. We will flourish and make sure that our name, our family is never forgotten."

Close to breaking she fell against him, hands clenched tightly against the plate of his armor as she let out a broken sob. She felt his arms around her and ignoring the sharpness of his plate allowed herself the comfort of his embrace. It was in his arms that she finally broke, her eyes flooding with tears as her whole body wracked with sobs so violent she trembled with the force of them.

"Forgive my intrusion. I know this is hard on the both of you but we must make haste if we are to make it to Lothering before nightfall," Duncan gently interrupted – head bowed in silent apology.

Pulling away Elissa wiped her tears and silently nodded her agreement. While she was certain they were no longer being pursued she knew that they needed to get going. To make their way to Ostagar so that they may inform the king of Howe's treachery and Maker willing, find their older brother Fergus safe and unharmed. Her determination giving her strength she began to walk.

Barely managing a step she staggered, the whole world spinning around her like a whirlwind as she found herself falling. Her legs gave out from right under her.

"Elissa," she heard her brother cry in panic.

It was the last thing she heard before she was completely lost to darkness.

Having spent the last few days of their travels sleeping wherever they could afford to stop Elissa frowned upon finding herself wrapped within the comfort of a warm bed and thick blankets. Suddenly wide-awake she quickly shot up and looked down at herself. To her immense relief it was to find that she was still very much dressed.

Before she had the chance to do little more than give the room a cursory glance the door opened.

"I see you are finally awake," an unmistakably feminine voice said.

At the sight of the redhead dressed in Chantry robes before her she immediately stilled.

"Your brother will be extremely relieved to hear that you are well," the woman she could only assume to be a cloistered sister began. With a cup in hand she entered the room and making sure to keep a careful distance, as not to startle her into action, held it out to her in offering.

More than a little cautiously Elissa gave her a suspicious look. It was only upon realizing that it was filled with water did she finally, if not still a little warily, accepted the drink. Thirstier than she realized she lowered the empty cup from her lips and simply nodded her thanks.

"Let me introduce myself. I am Leliana, one of the Lay sisters here in the Chantry," the sister simply said. "Your brother speaks very fondly of you Elissa. I am glad you are awake. I do not think Aedan would have the heart to depart for Ostagar had he not had a chance to speak to you before he was to leave."

Upon hearing those words she immediately straightened.

"What do you mean not have a chance to speak with me?" Elissa demanded, a frown marring her brows at the very implication. "He will have every chance to speak with me. How can he not when I am to go to Ostagar with him?"

"I see," the sister, Leliana, replied with a frown of her own. "I had assumed that you were aware."

"Aware of what?" she repeated in confusion.

For a moment there was nothing but silence.

"Forgive my evasiveness but I do not think it is my place to say," was her apologetic reply.

Not in the least bit pacified Elissa narrowed her eyes and was just about to demand an answer from her when she was suddenly interrupted by yet another arrival.

"Thank the Maker."

Before she could even turn strong arms wrapped around her, encasing her within an embrace she knew only too well.

"I will leave you to it," Leliana politely excused, a smile on her lips as she departed with a soft click of the closing door.

"I was so scared I would lose you as well," Aedan admitted, breath catching on what sounded suspiciously like a sob as he held onto her tightly. "Everyone kept telling me that you were unhurt but I could not help but fear the worst."

"Careful brother," she teased with a crooked smile. "If you keep this up I may come to think you've grown soft on me."

"In your dreams Pup," he returned just as teasingly.

Thankful for the moment of levity she pulled away from him and countered with a light, "Maker bless. Else I would have to seriously wonder whether or not you've been truly possessed."

Dryly he drawled, "Ha. Ha."

Her smile widened.

"Right," she began in a noticeably lighter mood. "So now that we have established you are still the same big mean bully I've always known let's go find my armor and blades so that we may get out of here and continue on to Ostagar."

When not a hint of a response came she turned to him with an expectant look. Still he did not reply.

Unable to take his silence for a moment longer she questioned, "Aedan?"

He sighed.

"I am afraid only I will be going to Ostagar with Duncan," he finally saw fit to inform her.

At his words her temper instantly flared.

"Don't you dare Aedan Cousland, don't you dare even think to leave me behind," she angrily snapped. "I am more than capable of looking after myself and you damn well know it. I will demonstrate how capable this instant if you dare condescend me with some sorry line about keeping me safe you big idiotic lug."

"It's not only you I'm worried about," he returned with just as much heat.

"Then what is it?" she demanded, her voice barely below a shout. "What in all of Thedas can you possibly be worried about? It was father's dying wish for us to become Grey Wardens and I'll be damned before I let your fool-"

"For once in your Maker forsaken life would you just shut up and listen," he all but shouted, leaving her suitably shocked by his sudden outburst. As the more rational and thoughtful of the two he hardly allowed his temper to get the better of him. It was a rare sight indeed to see her brother so worked up. She would have been impressed had his next words not been, "There is no way you can become a Grey Warden."

Her shock quickly turned into anger.

"Why the hell not?" she snapped.

Of all the things she thought to hear him say the very last thing she expected was, "Because you are destined to become something even greater."

Seeing her confusion he gave her a smile.

"A mother Elissa, you are to become a mother."

"You're kidding right?" she immediately replied, the disbelief clear on her face. When all she received in return was a frown she scowled. More than certain he was having her on she demanded with a steely, "Stop joking around and tell me the real reason."

His frown deepened.

"I am not making light of anything," he carefully told her. "You are pregnant. Two months at best if the healer is to be believed."

She paled.

"No. You can't be serious," she blurted out, voice trembling as she shook her head in silent denial.

This could not be real. It just couldn't.

"Please tell me that you are jesting Aedan. Please."

For a moment not a word was spoken.

"Maker," came his troubled murmur. He gripped her arms. Forcing her to meet his gaze he pleaded with a hint of desperation, "I beg you Elissa. Do not tell me that this was forced upon you. I do not know what I would do if it were so."

Upon realizing what he was asking of her she quickly averted her eyes and though it made her burn with shame truthfully told him, "No. Maker no."

Swallowing the lump in her throat she forced herself to continue.

"I was willing," she reluctantly admitted.

As soon as the words left her mouth she felt her whole body tense. Silently she braced herself for the recriminations to come, but they never did.

"I'm so-" she tried to say but before she could even finish uttering the words she found herself once again enveloped in his arms, the suddenness of the action stealing her very breath.

"Thank Andraste," she heard him murmur.

Confused and more than a little emotional she carefully asked, "You're… you're not angry with me?"

"No, you saucy minx," he answered, releasing her and stepping back to gift her with a warm smile. "I'm relieved. Just incredibly relieved."

"But-"

"How this came to be matters naught. This child is a blessing Elissa. A true blessing. Especially after all we have lost," he interrupted gently. At that his eyes flickered. His expression becoming pained as he no doubt thought about every single last one of those losses. While they all hurt equally she knew that one stood out above the rest. Oren.

He took a deep, steadying breath.

"We do not know what has become of Fergus," he continued. "For all we know we may be it Elissa, the last of the Couslands."

His eyes drifted down to her still flat belly.

Determined he stated, "We cannot let the Couslands die with us. We cannot risk you or this child."

"What of the Right?" she argued desperately.

Even though she could see the sense in his words she just couldn't bring herself to accept it. While she was more than confident in her brother's abilities she hated the thought of not being with him.

"While Duncan remains elusive I am certain there is more to becoming a Grey Warden than we know," he informed her with a frown. "When we discover your condition he was extremely disturbed by the very idea of you continuing and more than readily agreed to release you from the Right of Conscription."

Eyes widening she grabbed his arm and tried to hold back the tears.

"I do not have to be a Grey Warden to go with you," she pleaded. "Do not leave me here Aedan. I beg you."

"It is too dangerous. If something was to go wrong..." he trailed off with a troubled look. "You are the only family I have left Elissa. I will not risk you."

"No. You can't do this to me. You can't just leave me," she cried in her distress.

Gently he placed his hand over hers and with a seriousness she never thought possible said, "In all our years I have never asked anything of you but I will ask this of you."

"No. Please no. I can't lose you as well," she protested.

"You won't lose me. I will be back. No matter what happens I will find my way back to you," he promised her. He gave her a sad smile. "Besides I've long gotten used to being an uncle and I'm looking forward to becoming one again."

At that she crossed her arms over her stomach, eyes lowering as she finally allowed herself to think of the life she carried within her. The child she had unknowingly created with a man she hardly even knew. Even now, as the reality of it finally began to sink in, she still did not know how to feel.

"I…" she began to say.

At that moment she wanted nothing more than to scream at him. To demand he take her with him. To demand he not join the Grey Wardens and instead stay with her. Duty be damned she just wanted him safe. But she did none of those things. She could not. Because in the end she was still a Cousland and Couslands always do what must be done, what was right. For all her misgivings she knew that Aedan's place was with the Grey Wardens and while she desperately wanted to follow him she knew that she couldn't. Not now. As conflicted as she was she couldn't risk it. She couldn't risk this child, this innocent. This life she was now responsible for.

She took a deep breath.

"So help me Aedan, if you do not live to see this child take its first breath I will hunt you down in the Fade and drag your sorry arse back to Thedas just so I can kill you again for breaking your promise to me," she threatened, unable to do a thing to stop the tears from falling as she tightened her grip on his arm.

"If I do I swear I'll find a way back myself just so that you can punish me as you see fit," he returned in a shaky voice.

She wasn't quite sure who moved first but before she knew it she found herself crushed within his arms, her own wrapped tightly around him as she held on as if her life depended on it. With a choked sob she felt his whole body tremble and this time when she cried she did not cry alone.