Ok, so this took longer than intended, but that's life, I couldn't really do anything about it. I've notice mistakes in some of my publications, like words missing from sentences. I revised my Word docs and the missing words are there, so I don't know why, but when I public here they just disappear and I wanna scream bloody murder.
Big thanks for the favs, the follows and the reviews. Keep it up people, I'm a lazy ass, I get bored easily and drop things halfway. Don't let me do it, be my moms! Lol.
Thanks again, especially to Aranel Silvertongue, Baftan, Kasuka-chan and Tygon Lannister for the comments. XXX
- More wine? – Asked the inn's owner-.
- Yes, please – answered Bronn.
She filled our cups and went to ask the same question to the other tables. I picked up my goblet and downed it in one big gulp.
- You have a taste for shitty wine, don't you?
- You're one to talk.
- Yeah, well, I am not a princess – he downed his own wine.
Weeks passed since I last drunk a good wine back at Castle Black in the company of Tyrion Lannister. It was sad to part, really, nights of drinking, talking and laughing gave way to the beginning of a beautiful friendship. He was witty, sharp-tongued, cultivated… Yet very laid-back. He was a pleasant company. I even found him attractive. Uncle Oberyn was all for beauty and the body, that wasn't for me. I was into the minds. ''You can't fuck the minds, Enys'' he had said. ''Then I shall die a virgin'', I had answered. Now, don't get me wrong, I was no prude. Of course I was to remain a virgin until my wedding night, bastards were for men, but that didn't mean I couldn't do other things. Nudity and sex were treated with ease in Dorne, and I visited brothels with Oberyn and Ellaria more than once. I had experience with women and knew how to please a man even if I never did it. I could appreciate a woman's body, yet I couldn't bring myself to feel the same attraction for a man without previous personal admiration.
But back on track… Tyrion peed over the wall and we parted ways with the promise of a visit. Bronn was waiting for me north of the Neck. He would escort me back to Dorne from there. The north was no problem if you kept your distance from the few towns, but the south was another matter entirely, the Lannister army was everywhere. I met Bronn a few years back, when I had the great idea of escaping home. Why? And why not. I was a hyperactive kid, what can I say. Uncle Doran put word out for some of the best mercs of Westeros: a lot of gold for whoever returned me home safe and sound before the news of my escape reached the capitol. Bronn was the one to find me. He took me back to Dorne tied and over his shoulder, and he threw me on the floor at Doran's feet.
- Would you stop with the ''princess'' word?
- Oh, stop worrying, if someone hears me I'll just kill'em.
Just when I was pulling at my cloak self-consciously the door opened to reveal no other than Tyrion Lannister. There he was, in all his cockiness asking for a free room that didn't exist.
- Is there nothing I can do to remedy this? – He flaunted around a coin-.
- You can take my room – said Bronn immediately. That's Bronn to you, all about the money-.
- Ah! That's a clever man!
After that everything happened so quickly… One moment Tyrion was greeting Lady Stark (who appeared to be hiding under a scarf just like me) and the next every sword in the room was pointed towards him because according to the lady, he had conspired to kill his son while in Winterfell. Tyrion told me about the boys fall one of our drunken nights at Castle Black, he sounded really sorry for the kid, and even though he was cunning he wasn't the lying murdering type. There was sincerity in his voice and eyes when he told me he had a soft spot in his heart for cripples, bastards and broken things. I adjusted the cloak over my head and the scarf over my face and told Bronn to offer our services to the lady escorting her back to The Eyrie. Now, I don't have anything personal against the Lady Stark, but her lord husband participated in Robert's Rebellion, which resulted in my parents and brother's death. I had this conversation with Tyrion while in The Wall.
- Strange, isn't it? There was the Mad King, burning people for his own amusement, yet nobody rebelled until your father kidnaped Lyanna Stark. It never made sense. Rhaegar was everything the seven kingdoms wanted in a King. They still call Robert ''the Usurper''. I always thought it more likely that he and Lyanna just fell in love, or lust, and simply got away. Well, we'll never know.
Yes, we'll never know, and that was something I hated, not knowing. That's the reason I was heading for The Eyrie, Lysa Tully and her son were known to be off their rockers. I wasn't going back home not knowing what would be of Tyrion up there.
Let me tell you something: the King's justice sucks in The Vale. After a long way with some fighting included here we are, watching how Tyrion pisses off the ladies with his mockery.
- You've had your little joke, I trust you enjoyed it. Take him back to his cell!
- Is this how justice is done in The Vale? You accuse me of crimes I deny so you throw me into a cell to freeze and starve? Where is the King's justice? I am accused and demand a trial.
- If you are found guilty you will pay with your life.
- I understand the law.
The Lady had the moon door opened and told Tyrion that her son would judge him and then he would leave by one door of the other. As coercion it was great, that little shit was mental, and clearly too fond of the idea of making Tyrion fly.
- No need to bother Lord Robin. I demand a trial by combat.
Thank the old gods and the new he said that. It was his only chance if he wanted to leave here in one piece. And the ladies weren't expecting that, clearly, but what choice did they have? That was the law. There were whispers and laugher all around. Then a bunch of ass-kissers offered to fight for Lady Arryn, but she chose the handsome of The Vale. Too bad he was dying soon, Tyrion would name his brother, the best swordsman in all Westeros, and be found innocent in the eyes of the gods.
- I name my brother, Sir Jaime Lannister.
I wasn't expecting what happened next. Tyrion was denied his right to name a champion of his liking. Lysa Arryn said the trial would be today. Well, fuck the law!
- Do I have a volunteer? - Tyrion turned around.
Nobody in here would volunteer. Not even for the Lannister gold. Except for Bronn, of course. He was about to step forward when I stopped him and put my cloak in his arms.
- Allow me. I'm a little rusty – I smiled to him.
- As you wish, my Lady – he mocked me-. Tire him.
- I know what to do, Bronn. I'll fight for the dwarf! – I announced loudly-.
That nobody expected. Every head in the place turned in my direction. Lady Arryn was gloating about the fact that nobody wanted to be Lord Tyrion's champion when I interrupted her mid-sentence. Well shit, where are my manners? Tyrion was looking at me with a mix of surprise and relief.
- But you're a woman…
- Yes, I am a woman, he is a dwarf, good eye, Lord Vardis. Let me tell you something you can't see: I am the Red Viper's trainee, which means you are as good as death. Now, shall we? - I unsheathed my light sword, it was more like a large dagger than a sword. Swords were too heavy. The first thing Oberyn taught me was to know my weaknesses and use them to my advantage. I wasn't strong enough to wield a sword for long, so I used my short height and light weight to be quick and deadly in close quarters-.
He looked to his Lady unsure about the situation, but finally charged at me. First mistake. Never charge first if you don't have the element of surprise. I avoided him one, two, three times… I went up the stairs where I kept avoiding him and then jumped over the railing.
- Stand and fight, coward! – Yelled at me Bitch Arryn.
I would have responded something akin to ''or you could come down here and avenge your husband and nephew yourself'' but second lesson: save your breath, shut your trap.
Lord Vardis was coming after me again, so I kicked a chandelier his way. We kept like this, dancing around the hall. Third lesson from uncle Oberyn: let the enemy attack, get to know them. By now I knew Lord Vardis pretty well. He was boring, like many other knights. His strikes were predictable. No wonder I heard him piss himself when Tyrion named the Kingslayer his champion. Fourth lesson: don't rush it, wait for the opportunity. I could have stricken already, he left many open spaces to attack, but it didn't feel right. Oberyn taught me I couldn't see the opportunity, only feel it. I can't really explain it, but in a fight there is a moment when everything stands still, all your senses and emotions leave your body and you just know it: this is it.
And this is it. I cut him in his right side under the armor. He stopped to catch his breath. I could hear gasps and Tyrion celebrating. The Lady of the Vale was getting impatient, for she ordered her champion to finish me already. I blocked too strikes and twirled around cutting him behind the left knee. He went down, but stood again, and then he made his last mistake: let desperation take over. Fifth lesson: don't let desperation take over, desperation makes you stupid, stupid gets you killed. I made him trip and kicked his shield. He tried to strike me from the ground, but height and his wounds gave me the upper hand. I took his wrist and bended it making him drop the sword. This is it. I looked to the ladies, then to my defended, I held my little sword high and impaled Lord Vardis from the neck down his torso. A quick death. I left him fall through the moon door.
- There's your flying man, Lord Robin – I winked to the little crazy lord. Many would call me heartless, but hey, you know what you're getting into when you accept to be someone's champion.
- You don't fight with honor!
- No. I fight smart.
Tyrion was released, he paid a debt, Bronn gave me my cloak and off we went.
- What in the seven hells are you doing here? – Tyrion asked the very moment we were out of that madhouse-.
- Saving the day, apparently. Did you try to kill Brann Stark? – I stopped him in his tracks-.
- No, I didn't – he said with finality-.
- I believed you innocent, but I just killed a man for you, I had to ask.
- I understand.
- Bronn, escort Lord Tyrion back to… wherever. Take my zorse - I said petting my animal. He was a big stripped white and black equine from Essos. One of the many gifts Oberyn brought me from his travels through the continent. ''It reminded me of you'' he had said-.
- You're not coming?
- No, I'm not. It's been a long time since I last visited Riverrun. Don't worry, I'll stay out of the road. I free you from your duties, fret not, a Lannister always pays his debts. Speaking of which, you owe me a visit, my Lord.
- I do, my Lady. Be safe.
- I can't promise.