Author's note: The first part kind of sucked. I was kind of sleepy when I wrote it. Tried to make it better, hope its ok, even though its long =)

Lizzie searched the entire perimeter of the grove for the others. She searched the shed, nothing. The back yard, nothing. The area with the well, still nothing.

Her mind is going crazy, thinking about the possibilities on what happened to Carol, Tyreese, Judith, and her sister. Her mind reassures her that they were ok or they "changed" but it shifts into thinking that they were killed or found by a group that weren't as kind as their group. It was fine for her if they got killed as long as their brain wasn't hurt.

Her mind shifts from these 2 thoughts her mind conjures. It suddenly triggered a panic attack that was normal to her. She was getting agitated, getting confused. Lizzie felt like her mind was killing her, she wanted it to stop, she wanted to calm down, but how?

Right then, she heard a voice. A very familiar voice, telling her a certain sentence she was also familiar with.

"Look at flowers lizzie….count one two three with me…"

"Am I hearing things?" she thought. That was mika's voice. It must mean their near. She wanted to go them, she wanted to see them but doesn't know where they are or if it was just her imagination. This only added to her anxiety. She felt like she was going crazy like she was about to explode with her thoughts.

"Lizzie! Do what you're supposed to do.."

It was mika's voice again. She was right, she had to calm down, she had to do what was supposed to do. Lizzie calmed herself as best as she could. Her panic was still strong but at some way, she was calmer. She took a deep breath, looked at the nearest flower patch and started counting. "one…..two…..three….". It calmed her a bit but she was still panicking. So she tried again and again, until she finally calmed down. Somehow her thoughts, that were fighting against each other were now gone.

That was how she calmed herself down. It was hard to do, sometimes even to the point that it wasn't effective. But for her, it was effective in calming her when mika is around to help her. It was her sister that told her to look at the flowers when she panicked. She always remembered the day that she said that.

Flashback:

"Lizzie, please calm down" mika insisted. She and lizzie were at the park. Lizzie was having one of her episodes again. Bullies from their school always pick on mika. Lizzie was always defending her baby sister. She was tough, not afraid of everything. But on that particular day, her tough demeanor suddenly had a crack. A bully was nothing to her but when she was told she was a freak, that hit the limit. Lizzie defended her sister but the thought of being a freak subsided in her mind.

"You are a freak lizzie…." These were the words popping up on her mind. Added to the fact that those words were repeating in her head like a broken record.

"NO! I'M NOT A FREAK!...I'm not….I'm not…." Lizzie screamed.

Now mika is starting to panic. She needed to help lizzie count to three. It was what her doctor told her to do when she was panicked. Lizzie was "messed up". She thought differently from other people. She was misunderstood by other people and mika hated that. She wanted to help her but for lizzie, counting to three was nothing to her. Suddenly mika had an idea.

"Lizzie, count one, two, three with me please" mika said to lizzie

"It doesn't work mika, that therapy is bogus!" lizzie replied. She was breathing heavily now. Her idea better work…

"Atleast we have to try, look at those flowers. You like flowers right? Look at them while counting one two three ok?"

"W-will it w-w-w-wo-r-rk?"

"…Definitely"

Lizzie and mika looked at the flower patch and counted one two three. Lizzie's mind is beginning to calm, it was working. She was fine.

"it worked…" lizzie said with a tinged of tiredness, probably from the panic ttack she had

"You're going to be fine lizzie…."

"I don't know mika..they told me that I was…"

"I know what I heard and don't you listen to them. You're not a freak"

"How can you say that?"

"Because….you're my big sister, a very loving and protective sister. Is that a kind of person who is a freak?"

That brought a smile to lizzie's face. She hugged mika tightly. "I love you mika, I'll always be by your side" lizzie said

"Same here lizzie, same here…" replied mika.

End of flashback.

Lizzie relished that memory. The one person who was always there was mika. She never left her said and neither did she. Those who called her a freak might either be dead or different now, but she would gladly put a knife on their heads if ever they were walkers. For lizzie, they deserved to die…

Upon these thoughts, she almost forgot that she was looking for the others.

She heard mika a while ago, but it probably was her imagination because she still couldn't see a familiar face. She was worried about mika the most. She wanted her to change, to prove to carol and tyreese that you can be different but you can still be you. For lizzie, you are just trapped inside, not having control of your body when you turn. It was a little saddening for lizzie when the others kill them, but there were times that she had to kill one to move on. Walkers can be pretty stubborn sometimes.

Mika bickered with lizzie about this. Mika insists that the walkers aren't people anymore. That they were only dead now but lizzie begs to differ. She wanted to prove to everyone that she was right. She wanted to prove that they were all wrong, that the walkers were not just hungry flesh eating people. They were just sick and needed some love and care.

A while back, she stabbed mika to the point of killing her. But lizzie didn't mind. Mika will come back. This time they will be together forever.

But mika was with carol and tyreese for sure. "She'll be different now but they might hurt her…but carol promised me to wait. I know she won't let her be hurt".

Lizzie trusts carol and she believes that mika wil be safe with them.

It was dusk when lizzie woke up from here sudden headache. It was getting dark now but they were still nowhere insight. "maybe they just went for a walk..or gathered some supplies…" She said. Lizzie felt her mind attacking her again with thoughts but it was not enough to drive her crazy like last time. This reassured her and went back inside the house to wait for them. "I hope they're ok….."