Severus sighed as he leaned back on the cots headboard. He was nervous since he didn't have his wand. This could all have been a hallucination caused by a potion or spell, a trap to lure him in perhaps. As well earlier that day he felt someone pushing into his mind but with his own skills he pushed them back forcefully. He would not let his guard down, and certainly not his hopes up.
''How are you doing dearie?'' Poppy asked strolling in, one hand held a large tray with a display of potions. An array of shapes and colors, bubbling and fizzing. Smelling sour, sweet and absolutely guy wrenching. But he was used to it of course.
''It's only been a day Severus and you act as if you've been held captive!'' she studied the anxious look on his face.
''Well wouldn't you when you can't remember how you even ended up like this? Especially with…these uncomfortable muggle clothes!'' he looked down at the grey sweater he wore and flat front pants he wore. Throwing his head back he let out an annoyed grumble.
''Ahh that's more like it Severus! come on cheer up , it could be much worse , you would have forgotten us…Me , Dumbledore , Lily , Ro-'' She went silent and placed a hand on Severus's shoulder.
''You'll get your memories dear, for the better…'' and with that she made him drink the potions she had brought in.
Lily had gone later on the day to see him, thankfully not bringing Rose along.
''Hey Sev…'' she whispered and pulled back the curtains smiling. She walked in slowly and sat in a chair next to the bed leaning over and placing a kiss on his lips. Severus couldn't even think as he stared at her in surprise.
''What's wrong…'' she asked frowning at him. He didn't liked it, when her eyes where somber. It didn't fit her face.
''Nothing it's just…'' He sighed and shook his head. ''Nev-never mind. You came back?''
''Of course silly! I also came because McGonagall thought maybe if I showed you pictures you'd remember something hopefully. She took out a shrunk bag out of her pocket as well as her wand. With a twist of her wrist she reversed the spell and the bag grew in size.
''Look here, maybe you'll remember!'' she took out a large book, a photo album and placed it in Severus trembling arms. He tried to control it but somehow his emotions were much to wild, he was too relaxed and after years of being a spy he knew how to control them but around the love of his life it certainly wasn't happening.
''Look at this one! Do you remember? It was Roses first Christmas she was just 4 months old and we spent it at the Weasley's!'' He looked down at the moving picture. They were all standing in front of a large fire place which barley could be seen with so many people. Severus was standing up struggling to hold the squirming baby girl, Lily on his left side helping him. Laughing and speaking but no words could be heard. The Weasley's as well where laughing , the twins pushing each other around , the other boys trying to stand as still as possible but their eyes kept looking away from the camera. To his surprise Remus had stuck his head in the frame before the picture repeated its loop again. He decided to ask questions in the end.
''nothing?'' she asked, but as he shook his head the hopeful smile slowly disappeared ''well let's try this one!'' she flipped on another page. Not too far away Severus could be seen running across a large lawn, probably the Weasley's. He seemed to be chasing a two brooms. As he looked closely he could see the Weasley's twins mounted on top. If it was either George or Fred he could tell one of them held the little red headed girl in his arms tightly.
''It was Easter day, you where freaking out you know'' she laughed softly.
''No…I can't recall , what about a more recent one ?'' he looked up to see her eyes watered a bit but she quickly wiped it away with her sleeve and grabbed the book throwing it into the bag , she dug around for a bit but after some time she took one out.
''what about this one? it was just a week ago , you where arranging your office at Hogwarts since school is starting tomorrow , you had to come in quick since they couldn't find another defense against dark arts teacher again this year…Me and…me and Rose came to visit you'' Lily handed the moving picture to him. He was silent as he watched himself place the little girl on his shoulders. Lily walked as she placed her arms around him and they all smiled at the camera. Waving and laughing. They seemed perfect, happy and at peace.
''Can you answer some questions?'' he gave the picture back not daring to look her.
''Y-yeah like what sweetheart?'' she placed the picture back and ran her fingers through his thick hair.
''why was Remus in the first picture? We aren't friends are we?'' he looked a bit disgusted and she couldn't help but snicker.
''Yes , probably to your surprise we are friends , except for James and Sirius , we never did end up friends but you trusted Remus after he saved you from Lucius Malfoy'' Severus raised a brow but didn't press on.
''As well as the Weasley's, truthfully from what I remember I wasn't very fond of them…'' he scowled thinking back at the twins but dread overcame him when he remembered he shot one of their ears off. Wait which one of the two was it again?
''Well it doesn't look like it , we are godparents to the twins and the boys all call you 'uncle' we are apparently friends with them'' she snorted when she saw his face pale as if he had just seen a ghost.
''Oh come on, you even promised Molly you'd keep an eye on them while teaching here '' Severus undeniably wasn't too pleased with all this news.
''If I may ask, what line of work was I in before I came to work here?'' He asked a bit apprehensive.
''Well after we graduated from Hogwarts you became an Auror but after Rose was born you turned into a potioneer , it also helped with your grandfathers influence on people since he suggested you become his apprentice , that's what you've been since then on , at times of course you take the role of potions master for Dumbledore'' Severus was silent. At this time this was a bit to take in.
''so I've been teaching for at least two years now?'' he had a very grave look on his face ''and I like teaching?'' he asked swallowing the lump in his throat.
''well it would appear since last year for your birthday you got owls from plenty of students wishing to see you next year…'' He choked on air. Coughing and wheezing. Lily lunged forward and patted his back to stop him from choking.
''This is absolutely mental! Me being a happy nice professor!'' he scoffed and leaned back on the headboard.
''I must be crazy…''Severus muttered to himself but Lily caught it.
''If crazy equals Genius!'' She kissed his cheek and looked at him ''Look Severus , we are all hoping that this turns out for the best , we all want you to get better…I want you to get better…'' and with another kiss to the lips she embraced him in her arms and said her goodbyes.
He twisted and turned in bed. Severus was sprawled over the small cot, sweat running down his neck as he tried to get of that dream. The dream of his death and Lily's.
''some say eyes are the window or gateway to the soul, I personally say dreams…'' Severus shot up gasping for air crawling closer to the wall, he reached for his wand but he didn't have it on him.
''Do not fret my boy, it is only I, Albus…'' The headmaster spoke in a calm soft voice but still wasn't enough to ease Severus.
''What did you see?'' Severus growled at him getting up from the bed but far enough to make a run for it if needed, or, apparate.
''Calm down Severus , I am not here to cause trouble I am only a bit alarmed and perplexed as to why you have such a life like dream of…your death…'' Severus was silent as he thought of what to do and say next. Perhaps the head master could help him, or from his earlier theory, kill him. But he thought better of it.
''Because I did die…I don't know how but this isn't my world, I am supposed to be dead!'' He looked down hiding profound look of fear. It was strange in itself how he couldn't control his emotions as before.
''You are telling me…you have lived twice?'' Severus shook his head.
''I do not know , but what I do is that where I died is nothing like this , the times where darker…he-who-must-not-be-named lived , now I do not know what has happened in this life time , in this alternative universe.'' Dumbledore was quite as he contemplated what he was being told.
''Well for tonight , I shall let you rest , or what you can handle , tomorrow is the first day of school and we will not have time , maybe you can be shown around and see if you remember anything but at a later date we shall speak of this….'' With a curt nod he disappeared.