We Can't Stop
To my home girls here with the big butts
Shaking it like we at a strip club
Remember only God can judge us
Forget the haters cause somebody loves ya
Miley Cyrus
Disclaimer: Contents of this fanfiction feature the characters from the Fever Series by KMM, they are her intellectual property and copyright. We are just mere mortals exploring the story in our hearts. This fanfiction is in no way mocking KMM as an author but exploring a different version of possible events. Please don't sue us! It's a light-hearted rendition of the story following the events after the two years Ryodan's been MIA in High Voltage. That's a spoiler. Lyrics represented in this fanfiction are the property of the Ying Yang Twins, Miley Cyrus, and Beyoncé.
THE ORIGIN STORY
I realize some may find my transformation into a twerk queen baffling. But they don't know the full story so here it is folks. You all know about my childhood; I was locked away in a cage for a huge chunk of it. We did have a television though and not only was I held captive (literally!) but I was also captivated by all the things I saw. It was the only bright spot in my otherwise horrible childhood. I know how to find the good in most things and one of the things that so entranced me the music videos of early 2000's MTV. I used to watch MTV back in the day when they still played music videos instead of reruns of Teen Mom. I know all the dance choreography done in iconic noughties music videos like Britney's Oops I Did It Again. Eventually one day I saw Nicki Minaj's Anaconda video and it was a .revelation. I loved seeing the way Nicki moved, her complete confidence in her sensuality. That was the kind of woman I knew I wanted to be. Ever since I was 14 I've been listening to Nicki Minaj and other twerk-worthy music. I can't believe there's people out there who think Miley Cyrus invented twerking. I wonder if Ryodan's one of them and that's why he's such a big fan. I'm a bit of a history buff, I stay reading Wikipedia entries so I know that twerking originated in New Orleans. That crusty old man, don't know nothin', that's why he's so lame. You know it's my nature to be curious about such things. At 14, I didn't know anything about my own sensuality, that would be kind of weird. Like I did look up porn on pornhub but like, it was cuz I was curious you know? I don't see the crime in all that. But pearl clutchers will stay pearl clutching. But at 14 in the privacy of my bedroom, I would practice twerking. I never gave up and what you're about to see next is the result of all those years of hard and heavy twerking. Some people went to softball practice growing up, I went to twerk practice in my own bedroom at the abbey. When Rowena wasn't making me straight up murder folks outside, I was in my bedroom murdering dat sick beat with my booty popping.
WORLD DEVASTATION
The music comes to an abrupt crescendo and all of Chesters sucks in a final breath at the finishing move hidden in Ryodan's secret twerk kween repertoire. He manages to hang off the staircase railing with one hand, nodding back at the girls on the floor in time with the beat whilst simultaneously twerking back at the crowd. All of the patrons are fainting from straight up shock and the few managing to stay standing are making their way up to their overlord ready for some desk breaking action. "Pick me!" men and women alike scream up to him. Ryodan looks back down through all the commotion from the hurried crowd right at me. His expression speaks volumes with two words coming out plain as day 'checkmate fool.' The anger that runs through my veins at seeing his grandiose and artful twerk kween act is hot and startlingly volatile. I feel my deep-rooted resentment for Ryodan resurface. All these years with no phone calls, no texts, no sneaky dick snaps? And then he tries to come for my crown? My anger bubbles to the top like lava in a fiery volcano. Yeah. It's on like donkey Kong. Officially.
The crowd dies down, waiting for the next move, thinking it's over. That I just lost in such a humiliating upset. They're wrong. I throw my arms out wide and bellow in a loud womanly bellow "EVERYONE WHO VALUES THEIR LIFE, LEAVE NOW!" I'm a superhero first and foremost, I can't have people getting hurt without warning them. People at Chester's ain't my first priority but they deserve the chance to live. Anyone who tries to get in the way of this moment will be collateral damage. You can't say I didn't warn them! The fae are arrogant and not in the fun way like I am, so if they end up dead cuz they didn't take cover that's not on me folks. I watch Lor and Fade force everyone at Chesters to evacuate the premises from my peripherals, while I stare up at my childhood arch nemesis and mentor taking his measure.
DJ Khalid's still hanging back, looking all unsure and concerned. I kick up into the slipstream once again and fast and furiously type in Get Low by the Ying Yang Twins into his spotify search engine and queue it up. Never trust a man to get the job done right. That was my first mistake in all this.I come back down to the main dance floor, drop into slow mo using my holy sword of light as a pimp cane. Ryodan's standing there looking all smug with his arms crossed. The music starts up. I'm not a woman above calling in for reinforcements. Sometimes you need backup and I have the perfect person to battle at my side. We've faced much deadlier foes before. "Shazam!" I call into the air.
"You called Yi-yi?"
"Yeah, come help me end this right here" He plops down from the higher dimension in a bundle of fatness and plump sugar lumps.
"Shazam I need your help in defeating my greatest foe of all."
"How can I be of assistance yi-yi?"
"It's time to unleash what we spent years practicing in the silvers!"
"Anything for my Yi-yi"
The music starts and I see Shazam's lovely pudgy body rolls bouncing up and down as he twerks viciously. Wow, I think, Shazam's out here ending body shaming for good. This is revolutionary for the body positivity fae and other non-classified creature movement! He's exuding so much confidence, there's not a hint of shame or insecurity in his movements. He's owning that jiggle and I've never felt so proud of my furry child in my whole life. I've always wanted him to see the beauty in himself and he's doing it! He's really doing it! This makes my heart feel so light I feel like I unlock the final mastery twerk power.
Three, six, nine damn she fine hopin she can sock it to me one mo time
Get low, Get low
Get low, Get low
I'm throwing it back so hardcore and so is Shazam. It's like a tag team wrestling match. The floor literally is quaking from our high velocity twerking. We are going so hard we are causing an assquake. I roar out "TO THE WINDOW!" and Shazam bellows back in response "TO THE WALL!"
...
Let me see you get low you scared you, scared you
Drop dat ass to the floor you scared you, scared you
…
I hold my sword in one hand as I use it as a sort of stripper pole to balance me as I drop it low. I mouth the words you scared you scared to Ryodan. I look on as he literally stumbles from the ground shaking beneath his feet, fighting to keep his balance. Ryodan is literally shook! I'm feeling so much better about things right now! This is incredible!
...
Panty line the club owner said I need to calm down security guard go to sweating
…
Ryodan looks like he can't quite grasp what's happening in front of his eyes. He sends me a telepathic message screaming Dani you have to stop! My club! My ebony floors! But I can't stop and I won't stop. I'm too forgone and lost in this newly unlocked power. He should've called me and none of this would've happened but he didn't so now he'll just have to suffer the , fae, old gods and MacKeltars alike all run from the club screaming as the plaster falls from the ceiling. Out of the corner of my eye I see a male seelie get crushed under some rubble. That's what they get for trying to take out my sister Mac. One less fuck for her to deal with.
….
Got dam (Got dam) ya ya'll twerking a little bit ladies
But ya got to twerk a little bit harder then dat
Now right now I need all the ladies dat know they look good tonite
(where my sexy ladies) we want ya'll to do this shit like this
...
Even the lyrics of this damn song seem to be challenging me so I bust out my final move. I circle back and gear myself up for performing a cartwheel that turns into a back handspring and land straight into a split and continue twerking at maximum velocity. This is it, I think. I gave this everything, I did this with 110% of my heart. The floor gives out a final quake in protest and cracks open right down the middle. As my butt cheeks quiver in the dying throes from the excess kinetic energy left over from my finishing move, I stare straight down the deep abyss left in the floor at the source of Chester's geothermal power.
I land hard on what remains of the floor like I plan on landing hard on Ryodan's D later after his defeat. I turn my head in his direction triumphantly and with horror I see that he's collapsed on the ground. I stop immediately and yell to Shazam to quit it. I rush over to him screaming. "Ryodan! Ryodan!" I shake him trying to get him awake. Oh god, I think did I kill him? Was I always destined to be lethal in every single way? Another more horrible thought occurs to me. It's stops me cold and hits me like a bus. Was this what killed Dancer? That last and beautiful time we were making love I was throwing it back so hard because he was loving it and so was I. I have so much power and I'm out here using it on innocent people. I feel so much regret and pain. Where did Fade and Lor even go? Did they make it out alive? Did I kill them too? They are nowhere to be found! I did this. Mea Culpa. As I think this, I try my last resort. If anything will resonate with him these words will. I say, "Ryodan I'm so sorry. I never meant to start a war! I just wanted you to let me in." My tears rain down on his chiseled face. "I guess I should have let you win."
Ryodan's ancient silver eyes blink open blearily and I gasp! "Dani" he rasps. "That was amazing, never apologize for living your best life. I know how much this meant to you. I shouldn't have tried to take it away from you" I'm shocked. How did he know? He just always does, it's so wild. "But Dani, you should go now. I need time to recover from all this. I need to consider my own health and safety right now." I totally understand this. Sometimes I can be too much of a man killer. Literally! It's a lot to handle for any one man. Ancient, immortal, beast or not. I respect his wishes and get up and walk out of the demolished building that used to be Chester's until it encountered this tsunami. I whip out my silver iPhone X (not spons), I chose the color because it reminded me of Ryodan's eyes I can't lie. But I text Mac, listed as "Rainbow Girl" in my contacts.
Hey Mac can you pick me up? I'm outside of what used to be Chester's.
I get a bloop notification.
What do you mean "what used to be Chester's"?
It's a long story just come get me please!
Party in the USA blares from my phone, the chosen ringtone I programmed for Mac, honoring her American heritage. I hit reject call. She's too nosey sometimes. I just need to tell her in person.
Mac pulls up in her millennial pink Ferrari with tacky leopard seat covers and thrusts open the door wearing a juicy couture pink velour tracksuit with the word KWEEN stamped on the ass in Swarovski crystals. I love her unapologetic femininity. I'm so glad she's gone back to that instead of that melodramatic goth vampire voodoo queen phase where she was convinced wearing black made her more badass and serious. Women can be out here wearing pink and getting shit done you know? And men too, why not? Yass my pink king!
"Get in Dani we're going shopping."
"Ok Mac, we have a lot to discuss."
"So, what exactly happened? Why does Chesters look like a graveyard?"
"Ryodan, Shazam and I had a twerk off" I say gravely.
"What in the sweet Georgian tea magnolia lined streets of fresh daddy hell is this?"
"Mac, I don't know what to say okay, I just lost control. You know me. You know I have issues. I guess I just wanted to seek revenge on Ryodan for rejecting me. It was going so well at first too!"
"What do you mean?"
"I was out there declaring my thirst for him in public, making it known to all."
"Well there's your problem Dani, Ryodan's a private man. You can't be pulling wild stunts in public expecting to win his affection! We down in the deep South have a saying, you'll attract more bees with honey than with potentially life endangering twerking."
I consider this. Perhaps she is right, she sometimes is. I mean she wasn't when she didn't alert anyone I was abandoned in the silvers but I don't hold that against her that much. Like only a little bit. Sisters tend to be kinda rude to each other sometimes so it's all good. I murdered her biological sister, she abandoned me in hell like, whatever nobody's perfect you know?
"Hell Dani, next time the fae try to attack us if we're in really in the shit you could just twerk us out of trouble. We don't even need all these damn holy hallows."
I instantly feel attacked.
"Mac it's not fucking funny! People got hurt because of me!" I say, stung unshed tears threatening to escape my eyes.
"Dani, Shazam's melodrama is starting to rub off on you sweetie. Lighten up and get your responsibility dysmorphia in check. I say this with love, honey you need to free yourself from any kind of responsibility like I have ho ho ho."
"Never mind that now! Ryodan's wounded and collapsed on the floor! We need to help save his life." I say.
Mac turns back and shouts out to the trunk of her Ferrari "Barrons ya little shit come out of there at once and bring yo baby brother into the car!"
"That should do it, Mac" I say dryly.
Barrons pops up out of the trunk looking slightly underfed and withered with a pink lemur in his pocket and scurries quickly into the club to assist the owner.
She passes me the aux cord and I put on Run the World by Beyoncé. We sing along at the top of our lungs, finally getting a break from all this trauma and male bullshit and start having some fun of our own.
Girls we run this motha, girls
Who run the world? I look to her as I sing.
Girls! Mac shouts back to me.
Who run the world?
Girls.
Disrespect us no they won't!
Thanks so much for reading! If you want to read the original fanfic with the gifs and the accompanying music it's here at: saveryodani livejournal com (remove all the spaces and add fulltstops)