TOLD YOU REVIEWS WOULD MOTIVATE ME!

GiLaw helped me write this. YOU GO GURL! :) She gave me the ideas 4 some of these. Oh, and you can PM me your ideas, readers! I may use them!

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"OH NO!" Owen screamed, dropping the cupcake from his Girl Gourmet Cupcake Maker. "I'VE TASTED A FOOD I ACTUALLY DIDN'T LIKE!" He then proceeded to smash the machine. "CURSE YOU, YOU CUPCAKE MANGLER FROM HELL!"

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"This better work..." Mike slathered his face in all the Proactive cream he could find.

Three Hours Later...

"FUCK!" Mike stared at the mirror in disgust, seeing the small zits still dotting his forehead. "How the hell am I going to go out on a date with Zoey NOW?!"

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"Cmon, put on your shoes!" Lindsay tried to put a pair of sparkly high-heeled shoes on her Barbie doll. "Please?" She used all her might to try to shove the plastic feet inside the shoes. Inhaling deeply, she gave one final push. The shoe went flying and managed to lodge itself inside her nose.

"Ew, ew, ew, EW! GET IT OUT! GET IT OUT! TYYYYLLLEEERRRRRR!"

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"I can't believe I got this for Christmas." Noah placed the Furby on his dresser. "Okay, erm, I command you to speak!" He waved his hand in front of the doll.

The toy stayed motionless.

"I said, 'SPEAK!'" Noah yelled, annoyed. "THAT IS A COMMAND!" It remained still.

"Ha, ha, very funny. NOW FRIGGIN' TALK!" The doll gave a surprisingly human-like snicker.

"Oh, you fucked with the wrong guy!" Noah screamed in rage. "I'LL GET YOU TO TALK BY THE POWER INVESTED IN MY HELLISH MIND! YOU! WILL! RESPOND!" He stormed away.

"Merry Christmas, Noah," The toy muttered evilly as soon as he was out of earshot.

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"Tell me, Ouija Board," Dawn asked, her face lit by the ghostly candlelight, "What is my future?"

The pointer began to move, and she eagerly copied down the letters on a piece of paper as they were indicated. When it was done, she stared in horror at the message-

GO FUCK YOURSELF

"That is NOT funny, spirits!" she spat, upset. "Please, show some respect! This is ridiculous!"

The pointer moved again, and Dawn copied down the letters reluctantly. The message was as follows-

JUST LIKE YOUR MOM

"THAT'S IT! I'M RETURNING THIS!" Dawn gathered up the receipt and fortune teller and shoved them back in the box, fuming.

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"See, Molly, this is a doll that swims!" Zoey's little cousin clapped happly as Zoey lowered the Baby Swims-A-Lot toy into the water. It seemed to work fine, until it slowed a bit. It became clear very soon why it was so doll began to writh, spark, and finally sank, giving slow cries as it dissapeared into the dark depths of the pool.

"Oh, um, let's go on the water slide!" Zoey quickly led her tramatized cousin away from the site of the incident. The young girl began to cry. "I WANT MY DOLLY! GET THE LIFE GUARD!"

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"I TOLD YOU NOT TO BUY THOSE CHEAP CONDOMS, ALEJANDRO!" Heather screamed, feeling another contraction coming on. "I HAD A BAD FEELING ABOUT THAT DAMN COMPANY!"

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Mal looked up and saw the other personalities sniggering uncontrolling at him. "What? What is it?"

"You- You listen to," Svet gasped, trying to catch her breath from all the laughter, "H-Hannah Montanna?" She collasped again.

"WHA- WHAT!?" Mal shrieked, mortified. "THE PACKAGE SAID THE HEADPHONES HAD ABSOLUTELY NO NOISE LEAK! WTF?"

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PLEASE REVIEW!