Bombshell Records Chapter 2: all the pictures have been burned, a naruto fanfic

The Super Awesome Amazingly Wonderful Terrific Splendifuric Notebook of Notebooks That Will Never Stop Growing (Vol. 7)

This journal belongs to: Ino Yamanaka and Sakura Haruno

Karin: Classy Prostitute or Flat-Out Slut?
An ongoing analysis through the high school ages.
HIGHLIGHTS of the Original List
(Because Sakura is anal and says it'll take up too much room, chh.)
Sakura, Ino

9th Grade:
01. Those are hooker heels, NOT combat boots.
02. Someone get that girl a mirror and tell her that white eyeshadow is not attractive.
03. Belly button piercing. RIGHT OUT IN THE OPEN. Eww (trashytrashytrashy!).

10th Grade:
04. Dude, lab partners with Shikamaru. Not cool.
05. Oh, how I wish she realized that she has no chest to show.
06. GIGANTIC. FAUX-SILVER. HOOPS. IN. THE. EARLOBES. GIGANTIC.

11th Grade:
07. New Haircut: one half corporate office chic, one half street corner chic. Attractiiiiive.
08. Slept with Suigetsu for 50 bucks. Gross and a half.
09. …dude, she got Sasuke.

Conclusion: Karin is indeed a flat-out slut. FLAT OUT FREAKIN' SLUT.

…

Leaf Preparatory Academy

Student Agenda Book

This agenda belongs to: Sakura Haruno.
Grade: 12.
Homeroom: Room 331, Hatake.
Dorm: 7.
Room No.: 214.

If found, please return to the owner.

-&-

Tuesday, September 9th:

Objectives: Refrain self from killing Karin or self during AP Bio.

Um, and start doing calc homework for once.

…

Bombshell Records
ANGELforSHOW

II: all the pictures have been burned

…

I am not a morning person.

I accepted this fact when I turned 11 years old and the thrill of being up at 6:00 AM to help Mommy make breakfast wore off.

That is also when I started drinking coffee, sleeping until the last possible minute, and going to bed absurdly late, because getting less-than-enough sleep was better than getting barely-enough. Yeah.

Needless to say, I'm freakin' cranky every morning. Just like right now.

It's not that I can't keep my eyes or open, or that I get headaches if I don't get enough sleep. The getting up part just really sucks, because I hear the alarm go off and then I just lie in bed and think about how warm the sheets are and how soft the pillows are and how shitty first period is and how much I hate Karin and—

I know, I know, suck it up Sakura, it's not that bad. Sasuke is only a boy. Karin's a slut, she's nothing to worry about. Drag your sorry ass out of bed and prepare for school, senior girl.

It might sound sad, but that blurb is kind of really similar to what I said to myself this morning while I slowly kicked off the covers and lifted myself out of bed.

I put in my contacts, and now I'm here, leaning over the sink to examine my sleepy face in the mirror, while brushing my teeth with as much vigor as one can take out of an early, 5:30 AM Tuesday morning. Oh yes.

I scrub a little longer at my teeth (two years of braces taught me that ugly teeth are probably the most unattractive things ever) before I spit and rinse, and then I brush my hair as I wander out of the bathroom to go collect my clothing for the day.

I bet a lot of girls always feel some sort of thrill whenever they open their wardrobes and closest and dressers to pull out some fabulous outfit to wear to school for the day, even IF it's early in the morning.

I can also say that I wish I could feel that thrill every morning. But no, I can't. Because I go to Leaf Prep, and Leaf Prep is in the running for home of the ugliest uniforms in the universe.

Nothing can convey the utter despair I feel every morning when I pull on that ugly skirt and shrug into that ugly blouse. The skirt isn't too bad—it's generic plaid, with a base of navy and green and red lines, and the blouse isn't too horrible either. The blouse is just white, with a collar, buttons, and all the other monstrosities of button-up shirt land.

The uniform wouldn't be as bad if they actually fit. I'm pretty sure if I didn't roll up my skirt or pay the sewing club twenty dollars to tailor my shirts, I would go to school everyday looking like an Amish woman.

After pulling on my knee-socks, I go back into my bathroom and I put on some mascara, a touch of eyeshadow (except not in white! Just bronze, thanks.), a bit of eyeliner—y'know, the usual essentials—before checking my teeth and taking a few deep breaths ready myself for another sure-to-be-fantastic (read as: horrible) day of school.

I slip into my Birkenstocks (the pink ones, to make me feel cheerful), scoop up my giant tote of a bookbag, and my pat my skirt pockets to make sure I have my dorm key and my cell phone. Smoothing down my hair, I open the door, and walk into the day.

To: Sakura
From: Ino

hurry up and come down to the cafeteria. karin's telling everyone your hair is dyed.

To: Ino
From: Sakura

well shit. there goes my good day.

…

Ino's text snaps me into Catty Sakura Mode (as much as I hate to admit it), and I push through a few freshmen who are gathering in the hallway (I swear, they must live in packs or something nowadays). I fly down the stairs instead of waiting for the crowded elevator, and I stomp across the common area, the grass still dewy, ignoring the couples who are making out and the sophomores who think they're so cool because they snuck off campus to get coffee and doughnuts (don't they know that doughnuts made you fat?).

Pulling the cafeteria door open, I slip in to find Karin sitting on top of a table (with her thunder thighs hanging out. Eww.), telling a table of wide-eyed junior girls that "Of course her hair is dyed. Who has PINK as a natural color?" and "Oh, did you know that she had sex with Suigetsu over the summer. What a whore!" Sasuke and Naruto are sitting at a table next to her. Naruto is clenching his teeth and aiming Corn Pops at Karin's head (bless him), while Sasuke is just sitting there, sipping at his coffee with his usual bored, vacant face.

Meanwhile, Ino is another table down, arguing with Temari while trying to defer Karin's lies at the same time (heart!). I walk quickly to Ino's table first, dropping my stuff into a chair first, before approaching Karin.

Karin sees me coming (her fake eyelashes twitched at me), but she keeps talking shit about me anyway. "Hey, did you know that she got drunk with Kiba over the summer and fucked him too?" she told a junior girl—Kin, the creepy stalker girl in AP Bio—with a wicked (yeah, wicked ugly) smile on her face.

"That's really interesting, Karin," I say brightly, "But did you know that last year Karin slept with Suigetsu for fifty bucks?" I asked Kin, giving her a Splenda-sweet smile that just dared her to object.

Karin let out some noise (I believe it was a cross between a monkey's scream and a whistle?), and she jumps off the table (Africa just had an earthquake. Sorry, Zimbabwe!) and walks up to me. As if she has the balls the start something.

"Don't spread shit, Sakura," she says airily to me. Her eyes open wide and she pretends to look concern. "I heard lying makes you ugly."

"Being a slut must make you ugly too then!" I snap back with another smile. "Oh, oops."

Karin tosses her hair over her shoulder—the business slut side—as if it's supposed to be intimidating. "Y'know what, Sakura, I think you're just jealous that Sasuke and I have what you and him never did," she does some sort of victory snarl.

"Right, Karin, because a whore like you knows what love really is, right?" I grit out through clenched teeth. "Because you know how to do anything other then fuck some desperate people and steal boyfriends, right?"

The Bitch smirks. She knows she's hit a soft spot, and she's going to exploit it.

"At least I can keep a boyfriend," she says softly, walking slowly over to Sasuke. She runs a hand through his hair and nuzzles her cheek against his.

I can feel my face crumple, the anger disappearing. I turn around and leave before something even more embarrassing happens.

"Karin, give it a fuckin' rest, will you?" Naruto tells her, irritated. He gets up, leaving his bowl of Corn Pops, and I can hear him following me out the cafeteria. Naruto's footsteps are followed by a scurry of clicks—Ino's following him too.

I push open the glass door, and run across the common area. My shoes are going to get ruined, and my ankles are soaked with morning dew, and I can barely run properly in clogs, but I don't stop until I reach the big, sprawling oak tree behind Dorm 7.

I collapse at the base of the tree, and choke out a few breaths before I start to cry.

…

To: Sasuke
From: Ino

control your bitch of a girlfriend, will you?

To: Ino
From: Sasuke

How's Sakura?

To: Sasuke
From: Ino

oh like you'd care anyway.

…

The Super Awesome Amazingly Wonderful Terrific Splendifuric Notebook of Notebooks That Will Never Stop Growing (Vol. 7)

This journal belongs to: Ino Yamanaka and Sakura Haruno

Sakura—

I gave your stuff to Naruto after the, um, cafeteria incident, because he has AP Psych with you, so I figured if you didn't show up to AP Bio. (and I don't blame you. You should switch out and come to AP Chem. with meeee!), you'd at least go to Psych., so you'd have your shit for the rest of the day. Yeah.

And, in typical Ino fashion, let me just say that KARIN IS SUCH A FUCKING BITCH.

Um, and in regards to your note before, I DID think up of a list of goals for you to enjoy. AP Chem. so isn't worth the effort anyway, ha. (1)

It's on the next page.

…and expect another note after this, because I'll probably get bored again. Yeah.

—Ino

P.S. I have ice cream in my mini-fridge. Party after schoooool?! (2)

P.P.S. I attached a copy of my schedule to the next page too. Just for reference. (And NO, it is NOT for in case I lose it.)

(1) It's really not. I FREAKIN' UNDERSTAND STOICHIOMETRY ALREADY.
(2) It's that "French Silk" stuff from Edy's. You know you want some.

…

The Super Awesome Amazingly Wonderful Terrific Splendifuric Notebook of Notebooks That Will Never Stop Growing (Vol. 7)

This journal belongs to: Ino Yamanaka and Sakura Haruno

Because High School SO Isn't Worth It
Twelve Things to Not Do

(by: Ino)

01. Fail AP Chem. for using the class period to write notes instead!
02. Lose Shikamaru to Temari-bitch. Sigh.
03. Let Karin back onto my cheerleading squad, even IF she bakes me cupcakes.
04. Lose my iPod. Because I don't think my dad will want to give me a third.
05. Run out of eyeliner. That will be a dark day indeed.
06. Get high before the National Cheerleading Convention. (Cough, eheheh.)
07. Accidentally tell Asuma-sensei that I, um, kindathinkhe'sreallyattractiveee.
08. In response to number 7, tell Kurenai-sensei that she's a fat cow.
09. Fall asleep during Stats class. (I already did yesterday and it was the first day of school. Oh my god.)
10. Contract bronchitis before the chorus concert AGAIN. (Last year was the third year in a row. Do I really suck at singing that much?)
11. Play softball. (Tennisssss! Heartttt.)
12. Spend a year being a goody two-shoes. Let's get shitfaced more times than we can count this year, Sakura!

I mean it about number 12, missy.

…

Leaf Preparatory Academy

Student Schedule

Name: Yamanaka, Ino
ID: 004003698
Grade: 12
D.O.B.: 09-23
Gender: Female

01. 7:45 – 8:25: AP Chemistry – Maito, Gai. (Room 215)
02. 8:30 – 9:10: Select Choir – Shizune. (Chorus Room)
03. 9:15 – 9:55: Calculus II – Sarutobi, Asuma. (Room 365)
04. 10:00 – 10:40: AP World History – Mitarashi, Anko. (Room 117)
05. 10:45 – 11:25: French V – Yuuhi, Kurenai. (Room 156)
06. 11:30 – 12:10: Honors English 12 – Shiranui, Genma. (Room 311)

Lunch Shift: C – 12:15 – 12:55

07. 1:00 – 1:40: FREE PERIOD
08. 1:45 – 2:25: Ceramics II – Konan. (Sculpture Studio)

…

To: Ino
From: Sakura

skipping first period is very refreshing. you should do it with me sometime.

To: Sakura
From: Ino

oh, i just wrote you stuff in the notebook. and yes, i shall.

To: Ino
From: Sakura

what happened after i left?

To: Sakura
From: Ino

um, naruto and i looked for you for a while, but then we figured you'd probably want to cry in peace. and then i bitched at sasuke for a little.

To: Ino
From: Sakura

seriously?

To: Sakura
From: Ino

yeah.

To: Ino
From: Sakura

what did he say?

To: Sakura
From: Ino

he asked how you were, like, if you were okay.

To: Ino
From: Sakura

i hope you told him to go fuck himself. oh, sorry, i mean karin.

…

I did skip first period today…

…and I took a nap in my dorm instead!

Sleep makes everyone feel better. So, after sleeping through a blissful hour, I felt considerably refreshed. Reapplying some eyeliner, I left to go to AP Psych. Karin and Sasuke aren't in there, but Naruto is, which is almost as uplifting as napping.

Naruto greets me with an enthusiastic grin as we sit down in our seats. Ibiki-sensei projects some AP questions onto the overhead screen and barks (seriously, this guy barks) at us to get started.

"So Karin is the biggest bitch ever," I say to Naruto pleasantly after titling a sheet of paper.

Naruto sighs, and I feel kinda bad, because I know how much he hates being put in these sorts of situations. Sasuke is his best friend, and Karin is Sasuke's girlfriend. But I'm a best friend too. Scratching at his ear, Naruto shrugs. "I can't really deny that, but if she makes the bastard happy, I can't really complain."

Naruto stares at me with his big, blue eyes, and for a second I can understand why Hinata is so madly in love with him. "But I liked it a lot better when you were dating Sasuke-bastard," he tells me sadly. "Karin's boring. She's always PDA-ing, and god, it's annoying. And if she's not sucking Sasuke's face off, she's bitching about you."

That catches my attention.

"Really, what does she say?"

"She always tells him that he's comparing her to you and shit," Naruto laughs slightly. "And she always tells him to stop looking at you and to stop talking to me about you. She's a paranoid bitch."

I giggle, despite the fact that Naruto and I are talking about the Bitch. "That's kinda freakin' pathetic, if you ask me," I tell him. It might sound mean, but the fact that Karin's insecure about her relationship with Sasuke is really comforting.

Ibiki-sensei looks up from his desk and scans the room to make sure we're all working. Almost instantly, we all look down at our papers and pretend to work. (Apparently the scars on Ibiki's face turn red when he gets mad. That's a frightening sight that none of us want to see.)

I lower my voice. "I think we should boycott SasuKarin or something," I whisper to Naruto.

Naruto gives me a weird look. "You came up with a name for them?" he asks. "Like…like…Brangelina?"

"Hey, SasuKarin flows pretty well, so shut up," I protest. "And it was Ino who made it up."

Naruto laughs and Ibiki-sensei looks at him with his Nazi-face on. "Uzumaki, Haruno, get to work!"

"Yes, sensei," we say to him, angel smiles on our faces.

Naruto and I look at each other, laughter in our eyes still, and it feels kind of like last year in math class when me, him, and Sasuke used to crack up over the smallest things and get in trouble (except Sasuke. He'd just smile a little.).

Y'know, last year before everything was screwed up by the Bitch, that is.

To: Ino
From: Sakura

i suggest we officially declare war on karin-bitch. be my ally?

To: Sakura
From: Ino

oh, but of course.

She's so going down.

…

Um, yeah. To those of you who haven't heard, my MacBook was stolen a couple months ago (sigh) in Italy, so I lost a bunch of chapters and my muse, so it took a while to update everything.

I was originally going to wait until after VitaminWater was finished, but honestly, this story is way too fun to write to wait.

Review. (: