Chapter 2: Darkness

"How much time has passed since I left the world of humanity, and on my own conquered a whole new dimension of dread? When was the last time I found myself human? Long, too long, maybe even before god turned me into this, into this thing I don't know what truly is, or why it was meant to exist in the first place.

Maybe on a sense, it was not that long ago. After all, aren't I independent of time since the very beginning of my vampiric life? it doesn't matter if my conversion took place one second ago, one minute ago, one hour ago, a day ago, a month ago, a year ago, a century a go, or even millennia ago...for me it doesn't even matter, for now time holds no meaning. It is different for the rest of the beings on this world, though. A constant struggle for life, terror of age, all humans live with the burden of time over their shoulders with no way to escape, or no way to delay their inevitable death, the death that if it never got to grasp a being through indistinct "accidents", one day or another is taken away by time. There is simply no way to escape from that. Yeah, time is such a bitch.

I, on the other hand, have been the only truthful one who has exceeded the influence of time. I, I alone, as if I were chosen by the world to do something out of the ordinary. I live in such a dream, don't I? I am pretty much that lucky bastard in stories who exceeds because of nothing, because it was so, because it was meant that way. I never excelled as a virtuous man, I wasn't the best hunter, the best man, and probably my intelligence is not something that can never be recalled as my "strongest qualities". It was always that way, and in some ways I was accustomed to that. Just take the biggest example in my life, the example that lead me to my exile from humanity; the death of my brother.

I know very well that my story will transcend time, such as I will, I know my tale will be sang to the population and travel mouths through generations with some modifications that I will soon enough laugh off, some of the ones who hear it believing it completely, and some skeptical ones doubting it maybe because of reason, or maybe for the sake of insurgency. But in the end, my story is mine and mine alone.

In the beginning I was nothing more than a defenseless human. The son of the ones who conquered the paradise, and let it slip away. It was that way and always should be, because humanity cannot hold enough wisdom in their insignificant one hundred year span to be able to make a solid and endearing conquest. I was the firstborn, and since the root of my being I was taught the basis of agriculture, a science so simple and yet so revealing that time, the very first sign of progress, of evolution in humanity. I was proud of my doing, for I was one of the instruments that marked the beginning of a sedentary life, the prelude of the end of an era and a new one to come. It was that way until my little brother, Abel, proved me otherwise.

Abel was kind of a obstinate being. He was very simple-minded, content with small things and the minimum required to survive. There was not a single tear of ambition in his pathetic soul, and yet, he was a nice guy. He dedicated his life to shepherding, another occupation that started as humanity decided to settle down. He was a hard-worker, and also his diligence was something with no match, even though he only worked for the sake of survival. He didn't love what he did, he was just very good at it, but because he was excellent in his profession, he was a constant target of congrats. And everybody wanted him to shepherd the animals, for the ones that had the fortune of being on his hands were always healthy, meat of unparalleled quality.

I wasn't such a lucky being. I was a passionate man like no other, my ambition surpassed the will of humanity itself, and my intentions were far from being peccant. I was a good man! I intended to do my job properly despite my unfortunate paucity of talent in what I did. But I worked hard, I worked well, even though my crops were never the biggest or shiniest. I was passionate about my doing because I felt it as the root of civilization! I felt I was doing well, I felt as a virtuous man.

But he, the lord, god himself, thought otherwise.

Tell me for a moment, how would you feel if one day the concrete meaning of wisdom, the real meaning of right, found the doings of your brother as memorable, and yours as miserable? As you probably guessed, it felt as if the burden of an accursed destiny had fallen upon me. God felt grateful and proud of Abel's doing, while my fine crops were left behind and forgotten. The work of a passionless but gifted man was preferred over the work of a hard-working passionate man. It was like that, as simple as that. But I was always a man full of ambition, when I think about it now, probably no other could have ever matched my will, for it transcended life and death. I simply was not willing to accept an accursed destiny, so what did I do? I destroyed the treat! I killed Abel, his sheep, his cows and his non-existent dreams, because nobody shall ever dare to corrupt my ambition, nobody, not even my brother.

That, of course, awakened the ire of god, and since then, I lost the realm of humanity, having it slipped away from my hands. I endured suffering without equal, for in a long night god focused in taking the life of a man inch by inch, sucking dream by dream, but even though that suffering is something that haunts me even now, I never regretted absolutely anything, and I felt how I died a thousand times, and yet my esteem was always held high. And yet, somehow, god decided that that night wasn't meant for me to die. Why? I don't fucking know.

Living a life as a vampire is not something anybody would regret. Who wouldn't want an opportunity to live by the rest of eternity as a being of unparalleled strength? Nobody. That's why it was easy to sell humans the idea of a promised immortality if they followed my ambition. That wasn't hard to expect wasn't it? Of course I wouldn't misspend my superior life in a rampage, I would take advantage of my condition to conquer humans, to domesticate them, make them mine and mine alone. Force them to worship me, to treat me as their undeniable master. And so, the first civilizations came to fruition, civilizations of fear and stupid hopes of something I would never give them. And so I marked the beginning of society. Indirectly, the "curse" of god made me uncover the secrets of evolution, and helped me achieve my ambition. He is such a graceful being, isn't he?"

This chapter might be a bit tedious for some, but it was rather necessary. Just a chapter of thoughts, just before the insane wrap of time. Yup, next chapter will take place in the present, where the Hellsing organization and particularly Integra, Alucard and Seras live ;) what could be expected when the two vampires clash? we shall see.

Thank you very much for your reading.