Well hello there, thank you for clicking. Sorry for the longer wait. But it's a long one.
Infringement none. Profit none. Eating popcorn while writing? Loads.
This is the continuation of the Storm and Senses Series. If you haven't read those, you're gonna wonder what medication I'm on and have no clue what is going on. So I'd advise going back and click um.
Inertia
She's standing looking out of the big bay bedroom windows. She'd forgotten how beautiful it was here, how peaceful. Moonlight is reflecting beams off the water, silver dancing across the dark blue. She knows it's actually the sun's light reflecting off the moon. But in this place she doesn't care for reality, she likes the fantasy. She sips the tea she'd made when she couldn't sleep. Jane came with her. It makes her heart tachycardia.
She remembers panic, trembling with it as she waited in the airport. Eyes watching the clock as if she could break the laws of time just by will alone. When seven approached, she honestly thought she'd gotten it all wrong. Then Jane had burst into the terminal security point like a force of god, yelling, frantic. Only calming when her eyes fell on Maura. She had never been so glad to see Jane in her life. She'd listened as Jane babbled about traffic and a wanna be detective, stopping her in the main terminal. Listened to the 'I'm sorry. I'm sorry.'' listened, but all her mind was yelling. 'Jane is here. Jane is here.'
She smiles, sipping tea again.
Jane's face when she'd seen the jet, had been worth every single moment of panic. When they'd gotten on board and Jane had stopped pressing every button she found. She'd asked about Angela and immediately knew something had happened. Jane had shrugged it off, made a joke. But she saw beneath, Jane was hurt. When she'd tried to ask again, Jane reply of 'I'll tell you. But not yet... okay.' left the silence around them heavy with unspoken burdens. The rest of the five hour flight had been small talk. Jane asking about the island, she supplied full information like a good Google.
They landed just after midnight. The rental car waiting. The twenty three minute drive in darkness, showed very little of the highway connecting all the Keys, or Crawl key when they arrived. But Jane's face had been turned out the window, squinting to see, anyway. When they reached the house, Jane had stared at her with mouth open. When they went inside, Jane still hadn't said anything. She'd understood Jane was processing, taking it all in. The relief she felt when Jane turned and smiled with those dimples and said. ''Wow.'' Eased insecurities of her families wealth and how Jane would handle being face to face with it. She'd shown Jane the house. Her room. It was late and they were both more than exhausted. Each had retired to bed with nervous unsure good nights.
But here she is, unable to sleep, buzzing with so many things. Jane's presence so close is both a blessing and a curse. Jane is hers... She has only to say yes. Jane came with her, what more proof does she need? Her anger, hurt, betrayal does it matter? Her mind is at war with her body. It would take one hundred and two steps to be outside Jane's bedroom door, another six to be inside, twelve to enter her bed. One hundred and twenty heartbeats to give in.
She exhales slowly. But then what?
She opens the sliding door, warm air embracing, bringing the fresh scent of sea, sand. The AC suddenly cold on her back. She steps out onto the balcony, widening the distance to temptation. Pushing hair from her face as the breeze stirs. Having sex with Jane now would be a mistake, seeking nothing more than a sexual release, the euphoria of endorphins. Her emotions would not come into it. It would be unfair to Jane and most of all herself. If she does this, gives herself to Jane, it will be all of her. Which means her anger, hurt and betrayal do matter, they have to find absolution first.
She walks to the railing, cupping her tea. Eyes taking in the panoramic view. Looking along the white sand beach until she can see in the distance the place she used to go as a child. The familiarity of the surrounding is a balm, quieting the buzzing, clearing her mind... She has always known what comes next. Nothing in her life was left to chance, all planned, every equation anticipated. Even with Ian the closest to the unknown, she knew their relationship and arrangement, would continue only as long as she let it. This is the only time she has done something without completely knowing the outcome. It is exciting, but the undercurrent is fear. She has everything to lose, her heart, her work, her home. Because if this doesn't work with Jane, if they can't get passed what has happened. She knew the moment she arranged all of this, there would be no going back to Boston if it fails. She couldn't.
She sips the tea this time with trembling hands. She has taken a leap of faith, something she does not believe in. Science is her only creed. She trusts it, believes totally. Everything has a reaction, a cause and effect. It has never been proven more true in everything between her and Jane; each step, each choice, bringing them to here. This place, this time, this moment. But the laws of science didn't ratio in the unpredictable paradox of Jane Clementine Rizzoli. She suddenly wishes she were more like Jane, a paradox, living life without thinking or planning, ignoring the laws of the universe when encountering an immovable force. But isn't that what she's done by taking a leap of faith? Then if so why does she feel inert, stuck, motionless, waiting?
She sighs, shivering more from her thoughts than the breeze whispering across her skin. It's in the mid 70's. A welcome warmth from the 40's of Boston. She looks up, the stars visible, bright, no street or city light to obscure their glory. She remembers doing this as a child, watching the night. Being back is stirring all the memories of childhood. This was one place her father and mother would agree upon coming together, a moment of family. One memory especially is her fondest; her seventh birthday, they had brought her a chemistry set. She adored it, mixing household products, anything and everything she tested for reactions. One particular experiment coming to the forefront. She looks down, hiding a smile. She had combined ammonia and sulphur... They had to evacuate the house for a whole day. She had inadvertently created a stink bomb. Jane would be so impressed. She looks over her shoulder, expecting Jane to be standing there. She isn't and she is both relieved and disappointed... She at least hopes Jane has managed to sleep.
She sighs, thoughts floating from one to another, ghosts of inevitability. A yawn escapes. She takes one long look out to sea, before she turns, heading back inside. She slides the door shut. Placing her tea down on the side table. She removes her robe, throwing it to the bottom of the bed. She gets in. shifting until she is comfortable. She stares at the shadows on the ceiling, flecks of shimmering lights. Jane came with her... Is the last thought, before her body finally gives in to sleep.
…...
She blinks, once, twice, confused blurred vision showing things she doesn't know. She shifts, sitting, everything coming to full focus, realisation of where she is and why. She slumps back, stretching, yawning. Checking the clock for time, seeing 1:03pm, sends her sitting right back up again. She has never slept this late. Her head turns as she hears a quiet knock. ''Yes?''
The door opens and Jane peeks her head in. ''Hey, you're finally awake.''
She pulls the sheet higher, mindful of the fact her top leaves little to the imagination. ''I'm sorry. I didn't realise the time.''
''Nothing to be sorry for. I only woke an hour ago. Been looking around.''
She takes in Jane's appearance, still in her pyjamas. Dark circles under her eyes. No. Jane has not slept well. Her gaze follows as Jane enters. She is less than prepared in so many ways for Jane's presence in her bedroom. She pulls her legs up, needing the protection. Watching as Jane takes in her room. There is something on Jane's mind, her body is radiating it. She waits. Soon enough Jane eyes return to hers.
''You own this whole place don't you?''
She frowns. ''I told you this is my family house.''
''No. I mean after we came through the gates last night. Everything after that. ... out there.'' A hand sweeps towards the windows. ''…..the beach, the swimming pool, the boathouse... all of it's yours?''
She pushes hair from her face. Taking a moment to just let herself wake up a bit more. ''It belongs to my parents.''
''Which means it's yours as well. Damn. You really are loaded.''
She can only exhale. ''Jane. You knew I came from money.'' She sighs, watching Jane's agitation grow.
''Oh, by the way. Miss Tompkins, informed me after scaring the shit out of me when I went downstairs. The groceries have been delivered and packed away and if you need anything to let the agency know.''
She doesn't like what she hears in Jane's tone. It's the same one used when Garret appeared. ''My mother must have called ahead and arranged it.''
''Nice of her.''
Now she's getting frustrated. She's only just woken. ''She would have thought she was helping.''
''As I said nice of her.''
She balls the sheet in her fists. ''Please just tell me why you are annoyed?'' She watches Jane pace. It isn't the first time she has watched and thought of Jane as a caged tiger. ''Jane?''
''I woke up to a woman I didn't know looking like she belonged here and I didn't even know where the damn coffee was!''
Sometimes Jane is frustrating beyond belief. She keeps the irritation out of her voice, but only just. ''I don't understand. Are you upset about the fact someone was here? Or that you didn't know where things are?''
''I'm... I …... ''
She exhales. ''Please turn around.''
''Huh?''
''Turn around. I am going to get up and what I am wearing will only embarrass you.''
''Oh.''
She finds the blush which creeps over Jane's ears quite interesting. Shaking her head at how ridiculous Jane is sometimes. She gets up, pulling on her robe, tying it securely before she steps into Jane's line of sight. ''Come with me.'' She turns before Jane can argue. Knowing she'll follow. She leads them downstairs into the kitchen, pausing until Jane is level with her. She opens the unit above the sink. ''Coffee. Tea. Hot chocolate. Sugar.'' She points over Jane's shoulder. ''That is the fridge. Soy milk. Normal milk. The freezer section is below.'' She ignores Jane's glare. Moving to the next unit, opening. ''Dry goods.''
''Is that lucky charms?''
She does a double take, looking down into the cupboard. ''So it would seem. My mother has been quite thorough in meeting our requirements.'' She turns as Jane clears her throat, seeing her holding the fridge open and bottle of beer in her hand.
''Your mother knows me a little too well and has good taste in beer.''
She answers the smile. ''I may have mentioned your very unhealthy breakfast choices. As for the beer, she would have inquired as to which was suitable...'' She closes the cupboard. ''Are you okay now you know where the coffee is?''
''Yeah. Sorry... Was just a shock finding a personal grocery delivery person when I wasn't expecting it. Most people just go to the store.''
''Can you honestly see my mother grocery shopping?''
Jane snorts. ''No. I guess not.''
She can see it isn't quite right yet. ''I'm sorry it made you uncomfortable. I didn't know mother had arranged it. I would have warned you.''
Jane just shakes her head, eyes avoiding, until she takes a deep breath, a smile twitching her way, sheepish. ''Anyone else I should be expecting? Pool boy? Window cleaner? Sand shifter?''
''I am sure Sand shifter is not a profession. As to the others, not that I know of.''
''It just amazes me you trust people to come into your house. I mean she didn't even knock or anything. Or I don't think she did... But you know what. That's not the damn point.. She has a key and the alarm code, a complete stranger. I just find that weird.''
Ah. Now she understands why Jane has reacted. Protection. ''My parents would have security checked the agency and they have been using it for years... Arrangements are usually made before my parents arrive so everything is ready. I... I suppose it may seem weird to trust them.''
''Explains a lot about you.''
She doesn't know how she should interpret that. ''I'm weird?''
''No. I meant why you just offered my mother your guest house. Helped Tommy. Let us all invade on Sundays. You're used to letting people in your home.''
She bristles, feeling insulted about trusting people, like she is a child. ''I offered my guest house because your mother needed a place to stay and I could help. As for Tommy he also needed help... I am not naïve, Jane. I trust enough to believe in someone until they lose my trust.'' she suddenly realises how that sounds. Jane looking away confirms it. 'I didn't mean you.''
''No, I know. It's fine.''
It isn't fine. She sighs. They are so easily broken. ''I am just relieved you did not bring your gun. I would rather not spend our time here bailing you out of jail because Miss Tompkins startled you.'' It's a peace offering. The seconds tick, nothing, no response. Have they failed so quickly? A nudge to her side nearly gives her cardiac arrhythmia.
''You think you're so funny.''
Relief, like a cold compress covers her. ''I have my moments...'' She needs to leave. Regroup. ''Now that you know where the coffee is, would you prepare some, while I go and shower and get changed?''
''Sure. I'll even eat my lucky charms before you get back. So you don't freak at the sugar and salt content.''
''Thank you... '' She walks away, knowing she has to get control of this panic of failing that ignites so quickly. She pauses on the stairs. ''Jane.'' She waits for Jane to look. ''I am the same person who got on a plane with you in Boston. My families wealth does not change who I am.''
Jane's nod and small smile are enough for now. She continues up, towards her bedroom.
…...
She takes a long breath, smoothing down the light linen dress she chose, adjusting the mandarin collar into perfect place. Her wardrobe choice is limited, unable to take the full time to pack what she usually did for a vacation. Another first... She is washed, dressed, but certainly not ready for what is to come. The smell of coffee assaulted her when she stepped from the shower, it added a moment of normality, yet immediately set her nerves on edge. She stands looking at her reflection, there is a glimpse of recognition. So different to what she saw yesterday. Was it only yesterday everything was so wrong? With one last look she turns, knowing hiding is not the answer.
As she steps onto the ground floor. She pauses, Jane is standing, waiting, looking nervous yet giving a smile that actually makes her need to take a breath. With a dramatic sweep of her arm, Jane steps to the side, revealing a small table, set for two.
''Breakfast awaits.''
She doesn't know what to say. She has been to expensive restaurants, had meals cooked by royal chefs. But none of them has touched her like this. This simple thing. She walks slowly almost afraid it will all disappear. Jane is already pulling out a chair for her. She sits, taking in the breakfast, strawberries, croissant, orange juice, coffee.
''It's kinda lunch time, but I know I couldn't handle anything heavy.''
''Thank you.'' Jane is nervous. Which is helping her regain thought. ''This is perfect.''
''And no lucky charms.''
''I'm sure your arteries are relieved.'' She waits till Jane sits. Before unfolding her napkin.
''This is okay right? I... I didn't ask.''
She pauses on breaking the croissant. ''You don't have to ask to do anything here. This is wonderful and very sweet.'' she bites her lip, waiting. Sure enough she is rewarded with an eye roll. Sometimes Jane is very easy.
''Ew. Enough.''
They eat. All the time she's tense and she can see the same in Jane. They've lost the easiness they took for granted. She so badly wants it back. She finishes the strawberries. Looking up as Jane speaks.
''Answer me something?''
She can't help it, she immediately sits up straighter. ''If I can.''
''There is an ocean less than five minutes from your back door. Why the heck would you need a pool?''
It takes a beat to realise it's nothing bad. She dabs her lips with the napkin, a stall tactic she learnt from her mother to compose herself. ''For the sake of having one I suppose. I never understood it either. Although it is heated and tidal. It's very pleasant to be in when the weather changes and the sea is too cold or rough too swim in.''
''Hmmmmm.''
She smiles. Knowing exactly what Jane is thinking. ''You can say it.''
''Say what?''
''More money than sense.''
Jane laugh is a burst of spring. ''You read minds now?''
She can feel herself relaxing. This she knows, this teasing. ''I hope not. I believe reading yours in certain circumstances would be shocking.''
Jane leads back, smiling. ''For instance?''
''No.'' she laughs.
''Aw. come on... For instance?''
She has never been immune to Jane's charm when it is used. She thinks, sipping her juice, until she finds an example. ''The encounter with Judge Raymond in June.''
''Ew.''
She smiles at the face Jane makes. ''Exactly. After he had informed you on no uncertain terms were you allowed to enter his court room again in his life time. The look you gave him as he walked away conveyed what you were thinking.''
''A huh, Which was?''
''I believe you called his birth heritage into question and he was an offspring of a dog.''
Jane grins. ''You can't just say bastard and son of bitch can you?''
She looks over the glass, fully aware Jane is trying to embarrass her. ''I prefer not to use vulgarities.'' She watches Jane play with a strawberry on her plate.
''I like vulgarities, they make me feel better when dick heads are winding me up.''
''I know and you really do do them well.'' She raises her glass in a toast of acknowledgement. Jane laughter now is relaxed, merry.
''It's the Italian influence.''
This time she laughs. ''You are really going to blame the whole lineage of a country on your enjoyment of swearing?''
''Gioia di vivere.''
Her eyes snap up. The Italian slipping off Jane's tongue is like honey, hot honey. ''Joy... Joy of life.'' she sips the orange juice, coughing as it slips the wrong way.
''You okay over there? Need a hand?''
Her brain stutters on images on exactly where she would like Jane's hands. She isn't sure Jane realises what she just implied until she looks up and sees a knowing smirk. The heat infusion through her is instant. She clears her throat again. ''What do you want to do, today?''
''Nice change of subject.''
She has to look away. She's total unprepared for a full on flirting sexual Jane. Her voice is a warning. ''Jane.''
''Sorry... Okay, I have no clue. What's available?''
''Swimming..'' She has to take a long drink, to get the image of Jane in a swimsuit out of her head. No. swimming later, much later. ''We could go out for a meal? Crawl Inn has a marvellous choice of menu and is less than an hour from here.''
''Sounds good. No turtle soup right?''
''No... I'd like to show you all of the Keys. But for today, I'd just like to show you around here.''
''I'd like that.''
She rises, starting to clear the table, slapping Jane's hand away when she tries to help. ''No. I'll do this you go and get changed.''
''You know Maur. You're getting very violent.''
She lifts and eyebrow. ''Go.''
''and bossy.'' Jane is already turning, as always in a run.
She shakes her head, taking a deep breath. This is going to be a long day.
.
She is just putting the last of the clean plates away when she hears the unmistakable thump of Jane taking the stairs down two at a time. Wiping her hands she turns and the world narrows, vision pinpricked in focus. Black shorts, black tank top, black hair pulled tight in a ponytail. All simple clothes, all dark colours, all off the rack. Not one designer name to be seen. But on Jane, they are Devinci's, Mona Lisa... Dark with a hint of mystery. Oh boy... She turns away. Replacing the drying cloth. A smile fixed as she moves, lifting the bag she'd prepared while Jane was upstairs. The first thing she does is mask her eyes, placing Guccii sunglasses on. This way she can admire with out discovery. ''Ready?''
''Lead on.''
As they leave the house, walking the small path. It occurs to her, Jane in sunglasses is more than likely doing the same thing to her. It adds a sway to her step.
They're quiet as they walk, but it's not a heavy quiet of unspoken things. They are each enjoying the views, the silence. She leads, taking a small path away from the main track. One she knows, even though the last time she was here was ten years ago. She studies Jane, the intent, the interest she shows in everything. She answers the questions asked on flora and fauna as they walk. They reach the place she wanted, relieved it hasn't changed, moving free of the green lush area, down to the gritty sand. She pulls from the bag a blanket, flicking it out to lay on the ground. Ignoring Jane's knowing look of not wanting to get her dress ruined. She sits, waiting for Jane. Reaching and taking out two bottled waters, offering one over.
''Thanks. Always prepared I see.''
''I do but try.'' she grins, uncapping the bottle and drinking. Leaning back against the raised earth behind. They both take a moment to enjoy the amazing view. ''You see that tree over there.'' she waits for Jane to acknowledge she does. ''The darker area on the left?''
Jane nods.
''It's a dye mark. To show the tree cutter which tree to take. My father wanted it removed.''
''Why?''
''He originally wanted the boathouse here... in this area.''
''and he changed his mind?''
She looks down suddenly embarrassed. ''I tied myself to the tree.''
Jane's laugh is instant. ''You little suffragette you. How old were you?''
''Eight...I always came here, this place was mine. That tree was my friend... I couldn't bear father destroying it just because he wanted something new. The tree is over hundred years old. It's weathered hurricanes, population of the islands... It wasn't right, it belongs here, not us. I knew the cutter was coming in the morning. So I got up in the middle of the night, took the rope I had found the day before, came here and tied myself there. I didn't intend to be here all night but they didn't miss me till the morning. They found me here a sleep. I told him, if the tree goes I go... It was the first time I had ever stood up to my father, it was quite terrifying. He stood there looking at me, not saying one word. Then he undid the robe, picked me up, carried me back, put me to bed. He told me. 'Some things are worth fighting for...The tree stays as long as we do.' the next morning he'd cancelled the cutter and the plans for the boathouse were moved to where it is now.'' She chances a look at Jane, surprised by the look there. ''Whenever I come across something in my life, I always remembering those words and this tree.'' her eyes go to the tree. ''Can you imagine what it's seen. The history it's been part of... Their rings, they tell so much. A tree in London, which was over two hundred years old, held ash from a volcanic eruption over twenty thousand miles away.''
''Krakatoa.''
She looks at Jane in surprise.
''What? I read.''
''I know. I'm sorry, you just always surprise me when you know something I honestly didn't think you'd be bothered with.''
Jane lays back. ''Just because I don't go around Googling, doesn't mean I'm a dope.''
''I have never thought that.'' She lays back too, supporting on her elbows. ''I am well aware of your beautiful mind.'' She can feel Jane staring, she keeps her gaze out to sea. Knowing Jane will remember.
''Makes me sound like rain man.''
She knows this reference and she also knows if she looks Jane will be blushing. She's watching a gull over head when Jane breaks the silence. It gets her full attention.
''Ma was really upset.''
She turns her head, watching Jane take off her sunglasses and squeeze the bridge of her nose. She doesn't say anything, she waits, letting Jane take her own time with this. But it still makes her hold a breath of dread.
''Wasn't just about not telling her stuff. She, well, she said I was just confused about you.''
She's not prepared for the look of anguish. It cuts deep.
''Said I should go talk to our priest..''
''I'm sorry?'' That makes her sit up. ''Your priest?''
''Yeah.''
''I... Honestly don't know what to say to that, Jane.'' She removes her sunglasses, not wanting to hide from Jane right now.
''Pretty much my response. I just stood there for a whole minute with my mouth open... You know what really got to me?''
She still reeling. She can only shake her head.
''She wasn't surprised you liked women... But me, it's wrong and needs a priest bellowing fire and damnation to knock sense into me. '' Jane looks away from her. ''I told her I was in love with you and I didn't see how that could be wrong... She told me I wasn't... I'd get over whatever it was... I was using it to run away from Casey.''
She feels guilt she also had thought the same thing with Casey. ''You have to give her time. This is all a shock.'' She hates saying it. Instead she wants to yell how dare she!
''She didn't even like Casey that much.''
That information stutters her anger at Angela ''I thought she did?''
''Nope. Pretended. Now suddenly he's the perfect man for me. Man being the main word... She didn't listen to anything I said after that. So we just yelled a lot.''
She reaches for the water, needing to take the dryness from her throat. She swallows, it doesn't help. There is a building of guilt choking her. ''You told her you were coming here with me?''
''Yeah. I told her I'd talk to her when I got back, when she cooled down.''
Her eyes dip to Jane's hands, fisting sand. Body radiating something other than pain. ''You're not telling me something?''
''She said she didn't have any more to say to me if I wasn't going to get help and not run off with you.''
She winces. This wasn't them running off, this was to mend them. Jane had warned her it would be seen this way. She was naive to think differently. She wants to reach across and grab Jane's hands, they are making holes in the sand, frenzied. Before she can, Jane lifts them throwing sand everywhere. ''Jane.''
''I... I didn't think she'd react like this, like I'm sick!''
She brushes sand from her dress, an involuntary need to keep it clean, everything feeling suddenly dirty. ''It is the doctorate of her church unfortunately, homosexuality is seen as an illness.''
''Yeah... The same church that was going to dissolve her marriage and make us bastards. How can she believe that was so wrong and then turn around and yell at me for something else the church say is right. Loving you is not wrong, Maura. It might be messed up and I screwed it up. But no one is gonna tell me what I feel for you is a damn sin.''
''Jane.'' She has to take a deep breath to survive that declaration. She is before Jane's god and her mother. ''Your... your mother reacts first. It is a trait you follow.''
''Thanks a lot.''
She shifts closer, hating the look of betrayal on Jane's face. '' I didn't mean it like that. All I'm saying is, she will think about this. You know she says things she doesn't mean then is sorry for it.''
''I may react first like her. But I'd never disown my kid because they liked the same sex.''
''I know... She hasn't disowned you.'' Her pulses flicks fire. ''Has she?''
''As good as.''
She feels physically sick. She isn't saying what she wants. She's holding it in, keeping her anger, her views stifled. This is about Jane. ''Just give her time. I'm sure she will talk to you upon your return.'' She takes Jane's hand, needing the connection.
''She doesn't think very much of you right now, Maur. I'm sorry.''
''I can only imagine. I am responsible with my Parisian ways leading you a stray?'' She tries for humour, but it leaves a bitter taste in her mouth. This is all because of her.
''Among other things. Not believing in god got mentioned.''
She welcomes the heat of Jane's hand, the rest of her is ice. ''Of course. I am sorry this has caused a rift.''
''It...''
''Tell me... please.'' Desperation makes her shift closer until their knees touch. She can't lose Jane, not right at the start, not until they have a least a chance.
''What if she never excepts it? What do we do then? She won't stay in your guest house.''
She never thought she would lose Angela because of this. ''Your mother is welcome to stay or not. It is her choice.''
''Did you know Ma has a cousin Selena?''
''I haven't heard Angela mention her, no.''
''You wouldn't... Selena and Ma were close, sister close. Then Selena up and married John, when they were at school. Child bride, got pregnant. Ma thought he was an ignorant ass. Ma still doesn't talk to her. When Ma decides something she doesn't change her mind.''
''Jane, a cousin is hardly her daughter.''
''She may not ever forgive me.''
She looks down, feeling Jane's thumb rub circles on the back on her hand. Ever decreasing circles, leading outward, expanding. Cause and effect. Her eyes close. Flickering open again. ''You didn't have to tell her anything. What if we...'' She can't finish.
Jane is shaking her head. ''Because we don't work?''
''Yes. You would have done it for no reason.'' Jane pulls her hand away, breaking their connection. She deserves it.
''I'm trying not to lose my temper right now.. But, you said you were ready for her to know? Did that change in twenty four hours?''
''No. I'm only thinking of how hard this is for you and it could have waited.'' and if this doesn't work. I won't be returning to Boston and you'll be left with nothing.
''We'll work, Maur and if we don't... Ma needed to know how I feel and what the hell has been going on.''
''I'm sorry I just...'' She swallows hard, the pressure of it suddenly suffocating.
''It's okay... Whatever Ma does, I'll deal with it. But she'll want to yell at you for corrupting me with your pagan ways.''
The laugh torn from her is a desperate thing. Jane takes her hand again and she can only look at it in wonder. Her voice is a whisper. ''I've never corrupted someone before.''
''Well, like I always say, it's always the quiet ones you have to watch.''
She smiles, ice melting. ''On various occasions you have stated I am anything but quiet.''
''Okay then. It's the second thing I always say... You got to watch out for tree huggers.''
This time the laugh that bursts forth, comes from down deep, strong, full of life, freeing. Jane's answering laugh, brings the world back from destruction. She reaches, brushing hair from Jane's forehead, listening to her laugh tail off, the hitch in breathing. ''I'll face whatever wraith Angela deems fit for me. But I won't apologies for how I feel about you. Nor do I think it is wrong. There are various reasons I do not believe in god and the laws than man dictates are gods laws are one of them... No one should judge another person for their love. My mother respects my choices, she had no problem with my feelings for you.''
''Wait... You told your mother?''
She really does find it quite amusing the way panic hits Jane when it comes to her mother. ''Yes.''
''All about me? What I did?''
''Yes.'' She will not laugh.
''And she still offered this place and the jet?''
Amusement vanishes when she sees this is real panic. ''Of course. I asked for her help. She knew the reasons.''
''She doesn't hate me?''
Jane is a conundrum she hopes she never solves. Right now she has the child, afraid. ''She hates what you did because it caused me pain. But she doesn't dislike you. In fact she thinks very highly of you... She has never interfered in my life, Jane. But when I told her what had happened, what you did. She told me to listen, to wait. That not everything was simple reactions... She offered the jet and this place gladly.''
''She likes me.'''
She can't help but grin back as Jane face lights up. ''Yes. She likes you.''
''And she didn't care about the whole gay thing?''
''Jane, my mother is an artist do you honestly think a lesbian relationship is new to her?''
''Holy crap! You mean she...''
She nearly chokes on saliva. ''Goodness. No!'' at least she doesn't think her mother has ever... She wipes her mind of that thought. ''... I meant the circles she is in is very bohemian, someone's sexuality is not an issue.''
''Maybe Constance should drag my mother around with her for a while. Soften her up.''
''They do talk sometimes... I'm sorry Angela hurt you because of us.''
''I'll get over it.''
She can hear how deep this runs. ''No, you won't. You will survive it.''
''Yeah. I know this hurts you too... Your mother is okay, but what about your dad?''
''He's in Columbia at the moment working on a dig in Dleiald. I haven't managed to talk to him. But he is very like my mother. I don't think he will have any issues.''
''But your nervous about it?''
''Of course I am. He is my father. I care for his approval. If he doesn't agree, it will hurt, but it won't change my choice...You told Frankie? Tommy?'' As Jane face relaxes, she knows she's asked the right question. The tension leaves her as well.
''Frankie said no shit!. And then said you were hot and didn't blame me.''
''How wonderful.'' She laughs embarrassed.
''Tommy said it explained a lot and was relieved.''
She frowns. ''Relieved? Why on earth would he be relieved?''
''His ego, Maur. When you didn't kiss him it hurt his little bitty ego. But now he knows you didn't kiss him because you were into his sister, not because you didn't want to jump his handsome bones... . It's totally fine by him.''
''Oh... I see. '' She laughs, hiding the increase in pulse at hearing 'into his sister.' Not yet. She coughs, shoving the bottle into her mouth, taking a long drink.
''Korsak said, it was about time I admitted it and said good luck... Frost said, he owned his mother fifty bucks.''
''Why?''
''Because she saw it when she met us. The softball game. How we were with each other.''
''Our attraction?'' She had hoped she wasn't that obvious.
''No. Me running away from my attraction. She knew it, because she went through it. Knew all the signs. Frost said, his Mom is gonna scream like a little girl when he tells her.''
''And Frost?''
''No, he didn't scream like a girl.''
Jane's face is totally serious. She resists the urge to stick her tongue out. ''Ha...Ha. You know what I meant.''
''He wants us to name our first child after him.''
Her mouth falls open. ''He so did not.''
''Oh, he so did.''
''Bartholomew is a very prestiges name.'' It's shy. The idea of Jane and children, their children, is warming her insides.
''So is Madonna, neither of which I am naming our kid...I didn't mean... holy shit. I so d...i dn.t''
Jane's face, the panic, wide eyes, the stuttering, the red that is completely covering her skin. She can do nothing but laugh and laugh and laugh.
''Hey, stop laughing.''
''I can't... your face...it is ... oh.'' She holds her stomach, the muscles protesting this movement. ''Oh, Jane.''
''Geesh Maur, you're gonna bust a gut.''
''I... oh...'' her laughter tails off. Checking to see if Jane is still annoyed, but when she sees a shy grin. It's okay. ''Thank you. I needed that.''
Jane flops back. ''Yeah. Me too.''
''I like this.'' She lays back down, turning on her side to face.
Jane smiles. ''I like you.''
It has always surprised her how quickly emotions change with them. ''I like you too. I did right from our first meeting.''
''No way. You were looking at me as if I needed a wash. Hives.''
She bats away Jane's hand. ''Stop it. There won't be hives. I was actually assessing your skeletal structure.''
Jane rolls closer. Only a few inches now are between them. ''Assessing? A huh. There was an ass checking involved and it wasn't my bones.''
She snorts. ''I was checking for rickets.''
Jane bursts out laughing. ''You so did not think rickets.''
''I did. Your pallor was quite bad and so was your spinal support. I have mentioned it before.'' She bites her lip. Resisting the urge to roll closer. The heat is already unbearable. It is like they are energy cells, once connected energy is produced.
''You try standing in those boots for twelve hours on a street corner and your pallor and spinal thingy would be bad.''
''How much did you charge?'' She should not be flirting, she is not ready for what comes next. Not yet.
''Why Maura, are you trying to solicit me?''
She draws back as Jane rolls a little closer. She is playing with fire and she knows it. ''I am simply inquiring as to how much a lady of the street would charge in today's economic climate?''
They're locked again, in one of those all knowing stares, caught. She doesn't know whether to cry or give thanks, when Jane rolls away, standing. She takes a breath before looking up, waiting. Jane offers two hands, which she takes, letting Jane pull her upward. She sucks in air when the power of the lift brings her flat to Jane's chest. She can feel the expanding ribcage, like lava against her breasts. Jane's grin, sets her lungs stuttering. When lips come dangerously close, her eyes flicker closed. Only to have whispered words into her left ear, sending shivers down her spine.
''Wouldn't you like to know. Dr Isles.''
The breath is gone, so is the heat. She opens her eyes to Jane's form running away down the beach, with a yell back.
''Race ya!''
She is dizzy from lack of air, but a laugh breaks. Turning quickly she shoves the blanket into the bag. Turning and running to follow, she feels suddenly free.
…...
She is standing outside the beach hut, waiting. Waiting to the point she is resisting tapping her foot. They had come back from their walk, laughing. It was Jane's idea to go swimming. But here she stands all ready, swimsuit on, waiting. She exhales. Stepping closer to the closed door. ''Are you ready yet?''
''You sound like a kid on a journey. Are we there yet! Are we there yet.''
''Jane. you have been in there for over twenty nine minutes. I honestly don't understand why it is taking you so long to change into a bathing costume. Surely one of the guest ones fits you?''
''Guest ones fit. That sounds so wrong. Like used! And you can't just say half an hour can you...''
She exhales, annoyance peaking. ''They are all new. They are just refereed to as guest suits'' She checks her watch. ''And now it is indeed half and hour... You knew we were coming here yet you did not pack a suit of your own.''
''Well excuse me if my mind was on other things rather than the latest bathing suits.''
The snap back is instant. ''I had the same things on my mind, if not more. Yet I still managed to pack a suit.''
''Clever you.''
Sometimes she feels like she is having a conversation with a three-year-old. ''Jane... Did you or did you not find one?''
''I... Yeah. It's just, it's a bathing suit.''
''Yes. Referring to a garment worn when swimming, which we are about to do if you ever come out of there.''
''There's no need to get snarky.''
Jane's right, there isn't. But her body is hyper aware of everything. She just wants to get into the water and cool off. ''I'm sorry. Is there a problem with the suit?''
''It doesn't hide much.''
Irritation vanishes, mind suddenly thinking of scars. Jane's scar and how self conscious she is. ''Jane, this a totally private beach, no one can see you.''
''Yeah?''
''Yes... But if you prefer just wear your shorts and t...'' The door opens and her mouth snaps shut with a click. Jane is in a plain black swimsuit, leaving little to the imagination. Showing off her female form, one that is usually hidden beneath suits. She's seen it before in dresses. But she really was not prepared for this. Her eyes are taking in every curve, every expanse of skin. Legs that go on for goodness how long. Finally her eyes land on Jane's face. All that is left in her vocabulary is one vowel and one consonant. ''Oh.''
''Shit, is it that bad?''
What! Is she joking? But she can see Jane is so not. ''Defiantly not bad. Good. good.''
Jane eyes shoot up to her, then a smile spreads. ''Did I freeze your brain?''
''You look...'' Words she has to find words. Jane needs words.
''It's okay... right?''
''More than okay. Much more than okay.''
Jane looks at her now. Eyes trailing over her body, each hair stands straight under the scrutiny. Jane's eyes finally meet hers again.
''You look, good good too.''
She doesn't even bother to hide the blush. Because the blush is hiding much much more. ''Thank you. Now can we swim?''
Jane nods, reaching back for their towels. Falling into step with her the short way to the beach. They lay out the towels. She takes off her shoes. Looking over her shoulder to watch Jane near the water. She has to look away when her eyes automatically dip to her gluteus maximus. She really is a butt girl. She hides her laugh. When she's ready or as ready as she'll ever be she walks towards Jane. Watching in amusement as Jane peers into the water. ''What are you looking for''
''Sharks.''
She bites her lip. ''Sharks?''
''Yeah, google told me they're heerrrrrrrre.''
The blank look she gives, has Jane waving a hand at her.
''Never mind film reference. Anyway, are there sharks?''
''This area is to shallow. But there are sharks, Nurse and reef, they tend not to be aggressive unless you approach or try to feed them. Although tiger and great whites have been sighted. But not usually at this time of year.''
''That doesn't inspire confidence. I'll just listen out for the cello as a warning.''
''Cello?'' she actually jumps when Jane swings around to face her.
''Oh. my. God. Why am I not surprised you've never seen Jaws! The music, Maur. The music. Cello, every time the shark is near you hear; Daaaaaaaaaaaaa na. Daaaaaaaaaaaa. na. The closer it gets the faster the daaaa na daaaaa na's!''
Her eyebrows go up. ''That scares you?''
''No. What scares me is the ten foot shark with a mouth full of teeth that plays the damn thing, then eats you..''
She wants to say instantly it would be impossible for a shark to play a cello. But she wisely defers as Jane glares at her expecting it. ''I would actually be more worried about Southern and yellow stingrays, they often bury themselves in the sand or use their colour for camouflage. If you step on one, the barbed tail can cut your skin and inject painful venom. The spotted scorpion fish also has venomous spines that you should avoid also. Of course Mora eels and Octopus are not poisonous but... '' trails off. ''What?'
Jane crosses her arm. ''Anything else?''
''Jellyfish. Portuguese man-of-war. The Moon jellyfish, both frequent this area of ocean...'' she shuts up as Jane walks away heading towards the house. She runs to catch up. ''Jane, where are you going?''
''Now I know why your parents have a pool.''
She laughs, finally catching, pulling Jane back. ''Stop. The chances of encountering any of what I mentioned is very very low. You just need to be aware. It isn't dangerous.''
''Right. Not dangerous. You just listed the FBIs top ten in sea criminals. Nope, no way. Pool for me.''
She pulls her back again, amusement flaring like a torch. ''The FBI do not have a sea criminal list.''
''If you say so. Still not going in there.''
She has missed so much playing with Jane. It seems such a silly thing to say. two adults playing. But this, this with Jane is wonderful. She takes three steps putting herself between Jane and the pool. ''Please come swimming in this wide beautiful ocean with me''
''Did you really just bat your eyelashes?''
''Only if it worked.''
There is no movement, no words. Until suddenly she is tilting, a squeak escaping as she is lifted. Her brain doesn't have time to register the fact skin is next to skin, but it is all heat. She is trying to grab on to something. ''What... no!''
Jane's laughter is just plain evil. All she can do is hold on as both of them aim for the sea.
''Geronimoooooooo.''
''Jane!''
Water covers, wet, warm, salt. She kicks off from the bottom, coming up, shoving back her hair. Looking around, Jane surfaces not far from her. ''I cannot believe you did that!'' but she laughing, so laughing.
Jane swims towards her. She peddles water to keep in place. They are grinning. She watches the droplets of water hang on dark eyelashes, tears of an angel.
''Just so you know if a jelly fish gets ya. I'm not peeing on you.''
She lets the waves move her. Grinning. ''That is a complete myth. Often urinating on a sting only causes more pain. I would prefer for various reasons, white vinegar. Then a treatment of anaesthetic lidocaine.''
''Which of course I have hidden in my secret pocket.''
She can't help it, she looks, letting her focus go below the waterline, across the suit, over body. Coming back up. She smirks. ''Not in that swim suit you don't.''
Jane blushes. Swimming closer to her. Then in circles around, she has to turn her head to follow. Then readjust as Jane completes. The look she is receiving is making the water seem cold. It speaks in silence, of want, need, love. Nothing else exists. Her breathing increases, sensitive to water and air. Circling, orbiting, drawing closer. Jane stops and so does her breath. She licks her lips, tasting salt, wanting to taste it on Jane. Reasoning is gone, the arguments are gone. Jane moves closer, the wake of water touching, caressing.
''Maura?''
She swallows, needing saliva to answer. ''Yes.''
''There is a man on your totally private no one will see you beach. Waving at us..''
It takes a moment for an arousal filled mind to register the words. Her head whips around to see. ''How annoying.''
Jane snorts. ''That was not what you were thinking.''
She grins, swimming towards the beach. Slightly surprised as she exits the water, the man offering one of her towels. She takes it, quickly wrapping around herself. ''Thank you. How can I help you?'' He isn't listening to her and his attention seems to be fixed over her shoulder. She turns her head. Oh... Jane is emerging from the water like Aphrodite. Water cascading, suit skin to skin. She blinks... That explains his lack of attention. She scoops down lifting a towel, throwing it at Jane, hearing her grunt as it hits her in the face. She steps into the man's line of vision. Annoyed. ''Hello?'' she barely resists the urge to click her fingers at him.
''I'm sorry. what?''
She sees Jane step quickly into the beach hut. Now she is annoyed. Jane will be getting dressed not wanting to be seen in her suit. ''Who are you?''
''Duncan Richards. Constance told me you were here, I just wanted to invite you up to the yacht club tomorrow in Marathon, for lunch. We have a diving day arranged for Tuesday if both of you were interested. Novices included,''
''I posses a full diving licence.''
''You do? Why didn't I know that?''
She turns her head to Jane's voice. ''No reason you should. Boston isn't exactly a place I would use it.'' Totally disappointed to see her dressed back in shorts and top, the wetness of the suit leaving stains. So that's how she got dressed so fast... When she returns her attention back to him, she sees the same look of disappointment. ''You could have telephoned these invites. Mr Richards.''
Her tone must alert him. He stands straighter, eyes now fully on her face. ''I could. But I also had to return your jet ski.'' He points back to a truck with a flat bed behind. ''It was in for a service.''
''Jet ski? '' Jane is already heading towards the truck.
She catches him checking Jane out again. Irritation flares. She crosses her arms, raising an eyebrow. ''Excuse me.''
This time he has the good grace to blush. ''Sorry... Constance asked me to bring it back early, believing your guest might enjoy it.''
She can already see Jane's excitement. ''It seems my Mother really does think of everything. Thank you. Mr Richards.''
''Please call me, Duncan.''
''Maura..'' She shakes his offered hand only because of etiquette. ''That is Jane.''
''Hey Duncan, nice to meet you. Now tell me how this thing works?''
Annoyance flares again as Duncan grins. going over, eager, a little too eager for her liking. Her eyes narrow.
''Help me get it into the water and I'll be happy to show you. Jane.''
''Cool. Can I rig a harpoon on it?''
She watches Duncan stumble over his own feet, eyes widening. She has to cover her mouth not to laugh.
''What?''
Jane's grin is full of mischief. ''Just kidding. I prefer guns. Loaded ones.''
On that comment she now knows Jane had seen him checking her out. She has to bite her lip as Duncan takes a step back. She forgets Jane can take care of herself. The spike of jealousy leaves. Now she is just enjoying his look of fear.
''Nah. It's okay, Dun. I'm really kidding. You don't mind if I call you Dun, do you?''
''It's... no...I suppose.''
''Good man.'' Jane's slap to his shoulder sends him nearly to his knees.
She laughs and it startles her, not because it came from amusement. She is happy. She can feel it, spreading, tingling, shifting. Darkness is lifting from her shoulders. It's the first beginnings of breaking free of guilt, hurt, betrayal. There is movement, building, pulling. She is no longer an object at rest, stuck, waiting. She is pulled the direction of the unbalanced force, the paradox, Jane.
When Jane looks up and grins. Her lungs fill with light. She takes the first step of motion forward, momentum gathering, smiling.
TBC
An object at rest will remain at rest unless acted on by an unbalanced force. An object in motion continues in motion with the same speed and in the same direction unless acted upon by an unbalanced force.
This law is often called "the law of inertia".
There ya go. Hope it was worth the wait. Thank you all as always.
Tc x