Sarah glanced over the first page, letting her eyes flit over words. She flipped to the next page and then the next. It looked like this was Beth's journal, one she started when she found out about the other clones. Like a true detective she had written notes and made observations. Sarah found the first entry about Alison.

~ Alison Hendrix. Scarborough. Soccer mom, 2 kids, husband Donnie. Tightly wound / high strung / stick up ass

Sarah laughed because it was exactly what she thought when she first met Alison. The suburban clone always seemed so tightly wound, like a coiled spring. Sarah kept reading.

~ Protective of children. In denial about clones and cloning. Scared maybe? Wears too much pink.

Sarah snorted. These were spot on. She kept going; finding more of the same and smiling at the simple way Beth wrote about the other woman.

~ Alison is as high strung as ever, but seems to be coming to terms with the clone thing. At least tolerating my presence. She doesn't hang up when I call her anymore. Still a bit of a mystery…..

~ Alison seems to be more comfortable talking to me. Clone thing still scares her. She's tough, more so than people think.

~ Alison actually has a sense of humor once you get the stick out of her ass. She's kind too and a great mom. I admire her, even if she has a glitter filled craft room.

~ Alison and I spent the afternoon together. I enjoy talking to her. We don't have a lot in common; in fact I doubt we could be any different. I said as much to her and she laughed pointing between the two of us and said that yes we could be a lot more different. Oh, did I mention she can be a smartass? She's right though, but it's nice to have someone to share this with. I wish we could spend more time together.

She skimmed pages and when she got 15 pages in the entries writing changed. These entries were more personal and less observational. They started becoming more about how Beth felt about Alison and read more like a diary.

~ I finally convinced Ali to learn how to use a gun. She, of course protested, but went along anyway. She did ok for her first time, proud of her. She's a fighter and I can see the strength in the way she carries herself. I think she always seems high strung because she tries to keep everything in. She seems to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders.

Sarah pauses there and takes a deep breath. She knows that Beth is right. Alison holds in all in. She had only seen the woman come undone once, maybe twice. However, in true Alison Hendrix form, when she does something she goes all in and coming undone is no exception. Sarah flips to the next page.

~ Alison called me today. I was surprised to hear from her. We talked for hours. We swapped childhood stories. I had to laugh because it seems so surreal to imagine Ali as a child. A mini soccer mom wearing a pink sweater and doing craft projects. I told her that's how I picture her and she just laughed. She told me about college and her relationship with Donnie. Not sure how I feel about Donnie, but I guess it doesn't matter. I am happy that she's started to open up to me.

~ I took Alison shooting again today. She told me she's thinking about auditioning for a play at the Glendale community center. She seemed excited at the idea. I hope she does, it would be nice for her to have something for herself. I took a couple pictures of her today, not really sure why. I couldn't help it; she seemed so hopeful and happy, so unlike when I first met her. She's growing on me.

~ Ali called today; she got the part in the play. I congratulated her. She invited me to opening night. That was awkward and made us both uncomfortable. I didn't know what to say. She apologized and hung up. I want to go. I want to see her, but I can't. We can't be seen together.

~ I haven't talked to Alison in over a week. I think she's avoiding me because of the last time we talked. Maybe I should call her.

~ I broke down and called Alison. She was avoiding me, but not for the reasons I thought. Of course I had to pry it out of her. She said that she realized that we can't ever really be seen together and made her sad that I can't ever meet Oscar and Jemma. She felt stupid for even saying it out loud, but I assured her I feel the same way. I mean what good is it for us to be friends if we have to hide it from everyone. I asked her over for dinner next week.

Sarah paused there. She could tell where this was all going; she had the photographic evidence sitting next to her. She also knows how this all ends and almost tears up at that thought. She shakes her head and sighs. She wants to call Fee or Cosima to have someone to talk to about this, but she doesn't know how they'll take it. As she thinks about it, she's surprised that she hasn't even given it a second thought, until now. She has no problem knowing that Beth and Alison were together, hell she's just happy that they had each other. This clone thing has been tough on all of them and it's a comforting thought to know that Beth and Alison at least had each other to lean on. Had, she swallows hard around that word and closes her eyes. Images of the train station flash on her eye lids like a poorly filmed horror movie. Her eyes snap open and she starts to wonder if these images will ever go away. Shit, she didn't even know Beth and she can't get past it. She starts to think about Alison. She's been going through Beth's suicide alone. She knows that a big part of Alison's break down's and behavior have been because of it. Sarah wants to help, but she doesn't even know where to begin. She can tell that Alison and Beth worked very hard on keeping their relationship a secret and Alison would be mortified if she found out that Sarah knew. So how, how in the world can she help Alison. Sarah looks down at the open journal in her lap and a plan starts to slowly form. She flips to the next page and smiles.