Claudia leaned against the door to her quarters and sighed. "Another day done," she muttered, bending down to remove her high heels. The sharp edges of her grief were nicely blunted by the surreptitious sips she took from her flask throughout the day, and she congratulated herself on still being able to competently function at her job. "Now it's time for the real party," Claudia declared, making her way to the liquor cabinet. She found the cabinet empty. "What in the world?" Claudia muttered, rooting through her quarters and inspecting each bottle she found, only to find them all empty. "Guess it's time to restock," Claudia decided, moving to her bedroom to change into civilian clothes.
She had just pulled a sweater over her head when she heard a knock on the door. "What now?" Claudia wondered irritably.
"Claudia? It's Lisa," her friend's voice was slightly muffled from the other side of the door. "Can I come in?"
Claudia sighed. There goes her plans to self-medicate. "One minute, Lisa," Claudia called back, grabbing her purse. She opened the door barely wide enough to squeeze out. There was no way she was going to let Lisa see the state of her quarters. "I was just about to head out to grab a bite," she said, quickly shutting the door behind her.
If Lisa thought Claudia was behaving strangely, she didn't comment. Instead she asked, "Care for some company?"
"Sure," Claudia replied with an easy wave, and the two women made their way down the corridor.
"Where would you like to go for dinner?" Lisa asked.
"Well, certainly not the liquor store," Claudia thought wryly. "I'm not sure," she replied. After a pause she added truthfully, "I haven't had much of an appetite lately."
"I see," Lisa looked thoughtful. "Well there is a tapas place called Merienda. We can split some small plates."
"And a pitcher or two of sangria - sold!" Claudia thought. "Great idea, Lisa," she nodded.
Merienda was a small, unassuming place tucked away from the bustling heart of "downtown" Macross. Claudia appreciated that Lisa selected a spot that was out of the way. Her appreciation grew when shortly after they placed their order, their waiter appeared with a large, inviting clay jug of sangria. He poured each of them a generous measure before setting the jug down on the table.
Lisa eyed her glass anxiously, knowing her tolerance level would be easily tested by this one glass. Claudia, on the other hand, took her first sip of the heady wine with relish.
"Ah, reminds me of that one weekend Roy and I spent together," Claudia said fondly. "We wandered the streets of Palma de Mallorca and happened upon a beachside cafe..." her voice trailed off and Claudia regarded her glass, lost in the bittersweet memory.
Lisa worried her bottom lip between her teeth. "Claudia, I just want to say I'm sorry," she began.
Claudia raised her eyebrows at her friend. "What for?"
"I haven't been a good friend to you lately," Lisa frowned. "I've been in your situation before, and I know the depth of pain you are feeling right now. I feel like I haven't been there for you."
"Lisa, honey, you also know that at times like these, it's sometimes fine to let me alone and give me space to grieve," Claudia said. "And I do appreciate the space. Besides," she adopted a playful tone, "I believe you have been otherwise occupied comforting another grieving soul."
Lisa blushed furiously and hastily took a gulp of her sangria, almost immediately coughing it up. "I don't know what you're talking about," she gasped, her eyes watering.
Claudia smiled genuinely for the first time in three weeks. "I'm not blind. It appears a certain flyboy has got under your skin."
"Claudia, I almost killed him," Lisa protested. "I feel terrible about it."
Claudia drained her glass and then refilled it almost to the brim. "Sure, sure," she nodded. "The daily hospital visits and chats over coffee are fueled by guilt. I see."
"There's no way he'd see me as anything other than his superior officer," Lisa muttered dejectedly.
"Not with that attitude!" Claudia retorted, and then softened her tone. "Well it may not be the right time to go declaring your feelings right now if he's probably still grieving."
Lisa glanced up. "Have you spoken to Rick lately?"
Claudia sighed deeply. She and Rick shared a brief hug at Roy's funeral, but still felt too raw and painful to be near him. Rick and Roy were brothers in every sense but blood. The similarities in mannerisms were heartbreakingly unbearable. Claudia knew that she and Rick were the only two people who knew and loved Roy better than anyone. It would make sense for them to seek each other out, but it had been too painful. Claudia sensed Rick felt the same way by how he equally kept his distance.
"I look at Rick, and I see a young Roy," Claudia said, taking a sip of sangria. "It's just too much. I know Roy would've wanted me to look out for his Little Brother, and I know I'm failing him," Claudia's voice shook, and her eyes filled.
Lisa grasped the other woman's hand, her eyes filling sympathetically. She felt haunted whenever she looked at Lynn Kyle and saw Karl instead. A part of her wished so badly that it was indeed Karl standing there a few feet away, alive and well. But when Kyle spoke... even though his words calling for peace reflected Karl's views, Kyle didn't have Karl's sincerity or conviction. "I understand," she nodded, giving Claudia's hand a squeeze. "And I'm sure Roy knows you're not failing him. I know exactly how you feel. That your heart has been shattered in a million pieces, and you wish more than anything to have him with you. It's been some time and I still miss Karl. But you will carry on, and continuing you life doesn't mean you'll love and miss Roy any less, believe me."
Claudia averted her face and brought a hand up, letting her tears soak into her napkin. She took several deep breaths to calm herself. Lisa patted her hand, but kept silent, letting Claudia work through her current wave of sadness.
Claudia wiped her eyes, gave herself a little shake and drained her glass. "I'd better freshen up," she said, getting up from the table. "Lisa, can you order another pitcher of sangria?"
Lisa blinked dubiously at the now empty clay pitcher. Her own glass was barely touched.
Dinner was a pleasant time for the two women. The small dishes of various foods looked appetizing enough to tempt Claudia's absent appetite, and she felt that it was the first good meal she had in awhile. By the end of the meal, there were three empty pitchers of sangria among the empty plates, but Claudia was as steady as she had been when they arrived at the restaurant. Lisa's pink cheeks, however, reflected the effect two glasses of wine had on her.
"Let's call you a cab," Claudia said, guiding Lisa out of the restaurant.
Lisa pressed a hand against her flushed face. "Do you need a ride to your quarters?"
"No," Claudia shook her head as she reached over to open the door of the cab that stopped for them. "I'll walk. I need to work off that delicious meal. Thanks for keeping me company."
"Text me when you get in," Lisa gave Claudia a hug before settling into the cab.
"Will do," Claudia shut the door and gave a wave. "See you tomorrow!"
She waited until the cab disappeared around the corner before turning and walking in the other direction, determined to complete the errand she originally set out to do.