Authors Note: Hi everyone I just want to say thanks for reading and this is my first fanfic but don't be to harsh and give good advice on how I can improve my writing. Flamers will be ignored and if you find offense to anything displayed in the warnings below it would be best not to read the story.
Shoutout: I want to deeply thank my beta Stellryaoiluvr so much and I love her dearly.
Warnings: This chapter's only warning is implied boyxboy
Disclaimer: I don't own this story the creators of Naruto do, and if I did many characters on this show would have already shagged.
Chapter 1: Fearing The Unknown
The day after I left the room I had already broken my promise to myself to never see the 4th Hokage's spawn. I found myself in the 3rd Hokage's office looking at him in shock as he rocked a crying infant in his arms. He smiles up at me but I don't notice it, for my sights are set on the bundle in his arms thrashing and wailing.
"You would think they would give an old man a break!"
I look up at him more confused than I have ever been. Why was the child here? And as if the 3rd could read my mind he speaks up.
" No one could watch him, though I know that's not true," He lets out a little chuckle and continues, "So I'm taking care of him today, but he keeps crying no matter what I do."
I don't offer any assistance and prepare to leave office, forgetting that I was supposed to report on my previous mission. But before I can leave he stops me and I feel a weight on me, as if something bad was going to happen.
"You just got back from a mission last night I believe?" I nod and I feel uneasy when a smile lights his face.
"Can you hold him for a minute, I have to get some documents ready for a meeting."
I prepare to decline but the crying child in already placed in my hands and my jaw tightens at the thought of whose child I was holding. His eyes shift to me and his crying soon dies down causing the Hokage to look up at me but he soon turns his attention elsewhere.
"What's his name?" the fact that I even spoke surprised me.
" They named him Naruto, " his eyes soften as he looks at the boy in my arms, "it's such a shame they won't get to raise him, or that he won't know who his parents are."
This shocks and I ask why
"The council has their reasons, I opposed"
" the very fact that the demon who killed many loved ones is sealed in the child will be a burden on his life, but there was little I could do," he signed then started me in the eyes, "I know you loved your sensei very much but it would be troublesome if you were to let this information leak."
I look at him and shift my weight on to the other foot in unease at the mention of my sensei, the fact that the love the 3rd speaks of is different from what it really was, what it maybe should have not been.
"Got it!," The Hokage picks up a piece of paper and comes my way arms stretched out to take the baby and I am conflicted with emotion.
"I'll watch him," I say and once again I surprise myself.
"I don't know you're a little young to watch an infant, he's only a few days old." The worry in his voice offends me and in an act of pride I defend myself,
"I know how old I am but I'm also a Jounin," I look down at Naruto but his eyes make me uneasy so I look up again, "And he stopped crying."
He sighs and walks next to me and places his hand on my shoulder and I tense up.
"Fine, his bag is over there. I'm sure you'll take care of him the way his dad took care of you," his smile is warm, but I feel funny.
When the door shuts I'm standing in his office with Naruto in my arms looking up at me. He's silent but I feel like he's mocking me so I avert my eyes and pick up his bag and head out.
People stare at me while I am walking on the road and they whisper. They know who is in my arm, and I'm sure the fact that I'm holding him is even more of a mystery.
"Why would he have him, he killed his sensei."
"He killed the 4th Hokage"
"That's the baby the Hokage took in yesterday"
I hear them but I don't pay them any mind because they are the same people who whispered when my father died. I am almost tempted to tell them whose son he is but I don't, because the council have already told those who knew of his birth to keep quiet.
I am close to the Uchiha compound and Naruto starts wiggling in my arms. I hear his voice quivering like he's preparing to cry, and I start to get frustrated. He was quiet a while ago, why was-
"Kakashi," a voice calls and I look up.
"Mikoto-san?"
Mikoto is a beautiful woman who is sweet and gentle. As long as I've known her she has been nice and is probably the only Uchiha who doesn't look down on me for my left eye.
She is holding a baby of her own, who is about three months if I remember correctly, and has her eldest son Itachi, to her right.
"Oh my looks like we're both going to have our hands full today."
I smile nervously but I know she can't see my face so I nod. Itachi's eyes have not left the moving bundle in my hands.
"If you want you can accompany me, we're going to the park, right Itachi?"
Itachi looked to me then to his mother and nods.
"Thanks but I don't think I should."
She seems a bit disappointed but cheers back up "May I see him, I bet he's adorable!"
I bring Naruto closer to her and as Mikoto is leaning over, Naruto turns his head and locks eyes with Sasuke.
Both babies start to cry and Mikoto starts to rock Sasuke. I mimic her in an attempt to calm him and she bows before apologizing. She walks away rocking he child with Itachi by her side still looking at Naruto.
I stop rocking him by the time I reach the front door of my house since he was no longer crying. The house is the only thing I have left from my family because they are no longer here. So, when I enter the door and mutter Tadaimasu, I don't expect an answer.
I set his bag down on the couch and get out his blanket. I spread it out and lay him down on it and stare at him.
Why did I bring him here? Why did I bring him here?
By now he is staring back at me
"You know the people of this village are going to hate you forever."
I know he can't answer but I continue to talk
"They ought to, your father deserves that pain."
"He betrayed me, just to have you."
"That woman who gave birth to you took him,"
"Serves him right to have died too."
He yawns and averts his eyes toward the ceiling
"You're an ugly little shit you know, and you deserve having everything taken from you. You and your ass of a father are no different."
I turn around and kick a chair, but he doesn't stir.
"Just like my old man, leaving me all alone, I bet you'll die soon too. You know he asked me to look over you before he died. But I won't. I'll never be to you what he wants me to be."
I turn around and find you sleeping on the blanket. I feel immediate anger, but it dissipates soon after. I feel dirty, and I know that Naruto is not ugly.
I look at the way his fine blonde hair sits atop his head in disarray for someone so young. I watch his sleeping face and know he is beautiful, probably even more so than his father.
Hesitantly I move to Naruto's side and pick him up. He twitches slightly but doesn't wake up. I am holding him again and I am confused that I like the feeling. And for a moment I think of it as Minato in my arms.
Naruto sleeps soundly but I am up all night scared of the new unknown feeling I feel for Naruto. I fear that it is affection, I fear that it is hate, but most of all I fear what these feelings will mean for me.