"For we all seem to give our lives away
Searching for things that we think we must own
Until on this evening
When the year is leaving
We all try to find our way home

For we all seem to give our lives away
Searching for things that we think we must own
But on this evening
When the year is leaving
I think I would be alright
If on this Christmas night
I could just find my way home"

~"Find Our Way Home" by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra

The shuttle bay was a disorganized hell of hurried people shoving their way through crowds of other stressed citizens, shouts of happiness and frustration, and just a general feeling of tiredness and impatience. But Jim was exhilarated. The shuttle to Iowa left in half an hour, so he was fine to just sit on a bench and people-watch until the time came.

But it was one particular person that caught his eye.

Spock was walking crisply through the terminal, his bag in one hand. He discreetly avoided touching people whenever possible, but his mouth had set in a permanent line of quiet distaste. The direction he was heading implied only one destination: the Academy.

Jim wasn't sure what made him get up and intercept his first officer.

"Spock! Hey, wait!"

"Captain? What is it?" Spock had stopped walking and turned inquiringly toward the figure of his captain approaching through the crowd.

"First of all, call me Jim. We're off duty." Spock hesitated, but eventually nodded.

"Jim," he said softly. Kirk had to pause to shake off the…weird, warm, fuzzy feeling creeping up his spine. "Was there something that I can help you with, Cap—Jim?" Jim could pardon the slip-up. They had only been friends for about a year now. The year before that, they had been…colleagues.

"Uh, actually, I was just wondering what you were going to do over break."

"My presence has been requested to oversee several projects." Oh. Jim shifted from foot to foot uncertainly.

"Oh. Okay."

"Was there something you needed, Captain?"

"Uh, not really, actually. I was just wondering…" Spock raised his eyebrow in a 'well, get on with it' way.

"Wondering what, C—Jim?"

Jim took a breath. Okay, it was now or never. He wasn't sure why he was nervous, or even of why he was doing this in the first place, but he couldn't back out now.

"Jim?"

"I was wondering if you'd like to come with me to Iowa." He said it in a rush, like the words would choke him if he didn't get them out fast enough.

Spock was silent for a few moments.

"I must confess, Jim, that I am…unsure of your motives for asking that I accompany you to your home."

"What?" Jim was a bit thrown. What other motives could he have? He'd only asked because—

Because why?

Why had he asked?

Apparently, he was also unsure of his motivations.

Jim shrugged. "You don't have to, if you don't want to. I just…I just don't think anyone should have to spend their break doing work. And besides, my mom likes it when I bring home company."

Spock shifted uncomfortably for a moment. "I…I am uncertain how to respond."

"How about you just say yes?" Jim grinned at Spock, trying not to sound like he was pleading. He didn't know why it was so important that Spock come with him, exactly, it just was.

"You are sure I would not be intruding?"

"Hey, I asked you, didn't I? How could you be intruding?" Spock still looked unsure. "Come on, I insist." It took another minute, but Spock picked up his bag and followed Jim to the shuttle.

"So, why aren't you spending the break with Uhura?"

Jim could tell it was the wrong question as soon as he asked it. Spock's shoulders stiffened by a barely noticeable fraction. Jim told himself he only noticed because he was looking at Spock for a reaction.

"My personal life is just that, Ca—Jim," came Spock's curt reply.

"Ooookay. Sorry." Jim went back to looking out the window of the shuttle. "Oh, damn, I forgot to ask. Did you bring warm clothes?" Spock glanced over with an expression that was bland, but affecting "Of course, you idiot," quite well.

Jim cleared his throat, fighting the embarrassed blush that was threatening.

"It's just that, seeing as it's December and everything, it's probably already started to snow and…" Jim trailed off as he realized he was babbling. "I'll shut up now."

"Snow?" Spock said it so abruptly that it caught Jim off guard.

"Yeah, snow. Why?"

"I…have never experienced snow." Jim recognized a topic change when he saw one and grabbed onto it full-force. Anything to get away from the awkwardness.

"Yeah. It snows a lot in Iowa. Gets pretty cold, too, but it'll be warm inside."

"I see."

There was silence for a few minutes.

"My…mother used to have pictures of snow in an album on Vulcan." Jim glanced over at Spock. The words had been said very matter-of-factly, but Jim could hear the slight waver in Spock's voice.

They were both saved from a reply when the shuttle pulled to a stop.

"This is where we get off," Jim informed Spock a bit too brightly. He really had no idea how to respond to Spock talking about his mother. He didn't want to say anything that might offend Spock.

Even if offense was a human failing, and therefore did not affect Spock.

"We have to walk from here, but it isn't too far." Spock nodded, pulling his coat closer and tugging his knit cap down farther as they exited the shuttle. With a light heart, Jim set off down the flat, corn stalk-lined road. He only checked over his shoulder every now and again to make sure that Spock hadn't gotten lost.

The half-Vulcan seemed lost in his own world as he gazed around at the unfamiliar sights of Iowa.

They had only been walking for five minutes when the first small flakes of snow began to fall. Jim would tell himself later that he didn't squeak, so much as yell excitedly when he noticed. Spock would of course state otherwise.

And Vulcans never lied.

Dammit.

Nevertheless, whatever noise came out of Jim's mouth, nothing could change what happened next. Jim, completely forgetting Spock was behind him, closed his eyes and leaned his head back.

Then, twenty-seven years old or not, the captain extended his arms and began to twirl around.

Spock watched incredulously.

"Captain?" The word froze Jim in his tracks. Slowly, the captain lowered his arms to his sides. Then, with the air of a man facing his executioner, Jim turned around.

"You are not to speak of this to anyone, do I make myself clear?"

Spock quirked an eyebrow up.

"As you wish, Captain. But…might I inquire as to the nature of your previous activity?"

"It's…well…" Jim embarrassedly rubbed the back of his neck, color rising into his cheeks.

"If it embarrasses you, Captain, we do not have to talk about it."

"No, no, it's okay. It's just, it's a childish habit. Kids do it."

"Oh, I see. And therefore, as an adult, you find it embarrassing to continue to do it."

Jim nodded.

"Then why do you persist?"

Jim, who had begun to walk again, paused. "I don't know. Instinct."

"Instinct? Fascinating."

"Come on, Spock," Jim chuckled. "We're not far now. Let's get you inside."

*~*Merry Christmas*~*

The house was warm and busy. The smell of freshly baking cookies warmed Jim's spirit as he stepped inside and shrugged off his coat. Spock also removed his coat, revealing a dark blue sweater.

The hat stayed on.

"Jim!" A large, warm hand clasped down on his shoulder. "Look at you! A Starship captain already!"

"Sam! How the hell are you?" Jim wrapped his brother in a manly hug, one hand pounding him on the back. Spock stood of to the side, looking uncomfortable and hoping fervently—and illogically—that no one would try to hug him.

"Fine, thanks, Jimmy. And who's this?" Sam turned an assessing eye on Spock. Spock was okay with assessing. Really.

"My first officer, Mr. Spock. Spock, this is my brother, Sam."

"Live long and prosper, Mr. Kirk."

"Ah, a Vulcan." Sam raised his hand in the salute. "Peace and long life. And just Sam is fine."

"George!" a high feminine voice called from inside the kitchen. "Who's out there?"

"It's Jim, honey. And his first officer, Mr. Spock." A few seconds later, a brunette woman appeared carrying a baby and leading two more children. "Jim, you know Aurelan. Mr. Spock, this is my wife, Aurelan Kirk."

"Live long and prosper, Mrs. Kirk."

Aurelan laughed and hiked the baby up farther on her hip to free a hand to return the salute. "Peace and long life, Mr. Spock. And please, just Aurelan is fine."

Spock raised an eyebrow and turned to look at Jim, who shrugged.

"Better do what the woman says, I think," Jim chuckled. "From what I've heard she can be brutal."

Spock's second eyebrow joined the first.

"Have you been telling him horror stories, George?" Aurelan tutted, handing the baby over to Sam. "I assure you," she said to Jim and Spock, "none of it is true."

"Who's this little guy?" Jim asked, taking the baby from Sam.

"That's Peter," Sam informed him. "He's only one and a half." He gestured for the other boys to come forward. "This is Jacob, who's four, and Matthew, who's nine."

Jim crouched down in front of them. "It's nice to meet you, guys. I'm your uncle Jim."

"You're a Starfleet captain," Matthew said in awe. "Dad told us."

"Yeah!" Jacob agreed. "Will you tell us stories? Please!" The children begged, eyes becoming wide and pleading.

"Uh," Jim stalled. He glanced over his shoulder at Spock, who looked like he felt as uncomfortable as Jim did. "Sure. Spock and I could tell you some stories."

Spock looked vaguely alarmed.

Thankfully, Winona Kirk came riding to their rescue.

"Boys! Where are your manners?" Jim's mother appeared from the kitchen, an apron covering her jeans and sweater and a rolling pin in her hand. "The first batch of cookies is ready to be frosted, if you would like to help."

"Okay, Nana!" The two boys hurried off into the kitchen to frost the Santa-shaped cookies.

"I just hope they get the frosting on the cookies instead of all over each other," she chuckled. When she spotted Jim in the entryway her face softened. "Jim! Oh, it's been so long since you've been home for Christmas." She hugged him tightly, and right then he didn't care if her apron was getting flour all over his clothes.

"Hey, Mom. How's everything?"

"Great, just great," she answered, squeezing him once more before letting go. "Who's your friend?"

"I am Spock," the Vulcan said before Jim could open his mouth. "It is very nice to meet you, Mrs. Kirk. Live long and prosper."

"Peace and long life," she replied with a smile. "I do hope that you'll be joining us for the holidays?"

"Yes," Jim said firmly, before Spock could deny it like he sorely looked like he wanted to. "Yes, he is."

"Wonderful!"

"Really, Mrs. Kirk, I wouldn't want to impose—"

"Nonsense. The more the merrier, right Jim?"

"Right," the captain replied, sealing Spock's doom. "I'll show you our room."

*~*Merry Christmas*~*

Dinner had passed uneventfully (for the Kirk household, at least), and soon everyone was gathered around the fire Sam had lit in the grate in the living room. Aurelan had put Peter to bed an hour or so ago, and she and Sam had taken the couch on the left. The right couch was occupied by Winona and Spock.

Jim was sitting on the rug, his back to the fire, with Matthew and Jacob sitting excitedly in front of him.

"So there I was, surrounded by Klingons on every side, all of them armed to their very teeth with disrupters and no chance of escape—"

"Oh my God, what did you do then?!" Matthew demanded.

"Yeah, yeah! What did you do then?" Jacob echoed.

"What did I do? I'll tell you what I did. I pulled out my phaser and trained it on the breastplate of the Klingon in front of me. Just as I pressed the trigger, he ducked out of the way—"

"So you missed?" Jacob interrupted.

"No," Jim said patiently. "As I was saying—he ducked out of the way. Which was just what I wanted him to do. The beam went right over his right shoulder and hit the wire that held the bridge up."

The boys leaned forward, eyes shining.

"The bridge fell, and all of the Klingons fell, too. All…but one."

Jacob gasped.

"And then?" Matthew prompted.

"Yeah," Sam snickered, "and then what happened, Jimmy?"

Jim stuck out his tongue at Sam.

"So, it was him and me. I was hanging on by my fingertips—I'd dug then into the grating, you see—and he was hanging onto my ankle. You could hear the wire at the other end straining—"

"'Cause Jim's fat," Sam added.

"Shut up, Dad!" Jacob said before Jim could even open his mouth. Jim raised an eyebrow and Sam fell quiet, gaping. "Go on," the 4-year-old urged.

Aurelan cracked up.

After they had all had a good laugh (well, Spock hadn't, but Jim could see the amusement in his eyes), Jim went on.

"So, the wires were straining. And then, suddenly, they gave out! We were falling—falling through the endless abyss. Then he fired his disrupter. I barely dodged it and returned fire. The air was filled with the deafening whine of lasers."

Aurelan covered her mouth to hide her laughter.

"Just when I thought I was done for, we began to grapple and I got my communicator off his belt."

"Kirk to Enterprise!" Matthew shouted.

"Damn straight." Jim nodded, quite satisfied.

"Enterprise here, Captain," Spock said from the couch, and Jim grinned up at him. Spock had wrapped himself in a blanket and was watching Jim through smiling eyes.

Jim's heart did this weird flip-flop thing.

He shook his head. "Right. 'Beam me up! Beam me up!' I shouted as I dodged another bolt."

"'Right away, Captain. …Please stop moving,'" Spock put in from the couch.

"'I can't, dammit! I'm falling to my death!' I shouted back, and fired my phaser."

"'…Yes sir," Spock said helpfully.

Jim smiled at him encouragingly.

"He took aim, snarling menacingly. There was no way I could get out of the way in time."

"'Beginning beaming. Six, five, four…'" Spock called from the folds of the blanket he had pulled over his head.

"I was going to die. It was going to hit me before they beamed me back aboard. All they would get would be a dead body."

Jim wiggled his eyebrows.

"So what did you do?" Sam asked, curious despite himself.

"I took my phaser," Jim said, miming taking it off his belt, "and shot the disrupter bolt off course."

"No fucking way!" Sam shouted, just as Winona and Aurelan broke into peals of helpless laughter.

Both of Spock's eyebrows hit his hairline under the blanket.

"Whoa…" Jacob breathed.

"Yeah," Jim nodded. "It was pretty intense."

"What happened next?" Matthew asked breathlessly.

"We faced off. Both of us fired at the exact same time."

"'Three, two…'" Spock continued.

"And I was transported back to the ship. But not before my phaser bolt hit him—BAM!"

Jim clapped his hands.

"Right between the eyes."

Matthew and Jacob held their breath.

"And we flew off into the stars, crisis averted. The end."

"Wow." The boys' eyes were as round as saucers.

"Tell us another!" Jacob pleaded. Jim rolled his shoulders back and stretched his arms above his head.

"I dunno…"

"Tell us about Nero! And the blow-up of Vulcan!" the young boy continued.

The room was suddenly very quiet.

"Actually, it's time for you to go to bed," Aurelan said firmly. "Say goodnight."

"'Night Dad, 'night Nana, 'night Uncle Jim, 'night Uncle Spock." Jim blinked. Uncle Spock? That was cute. He tried to distract himself with that as the kids went upstairs to bed.

"I am so sorry," Sam said as soon as they were out of hearing range. "He didn't mean it the way it sounded, I'm sure—"

"It's quite all right," Spock assured him stiffly, rising from the couch. "But if you do not mind, I think I will retire."

"No, no, of course not. You go right ahead," Winona muttered helplessly, shooting a worried look at Jim.

"I'll show you where the extra blankets are," Jim said, standing from the carpet. "In case you get cold in the night."

"Thank you, Captain," Spock said with a brisk nod. They moved toward the stairs, climbing quietly into the dark hallway above. In the light cast from the kids' open door, Jim could see that Spock's shoulders were tense. Jim had no idea what to do.

He hesitantly put his hand on Spock's shoulder.

Spock jumped slightly, tensing even further. Jim almost removed his hand, but then Spock relaxed marginally. For a moment he seemed to Jim to lean into the touch.

The captain tried to make that hand as comforting as he could.

"Jim," Spock said softly.

"Yeah?"

Spock started, as if he had forgotten Jim was there. Jim gave Spock's shoulder the slightest squeeze before he removed his hand. Spock turned to look at him.

"I was simply…correcting myself. You asked to be called 'Jim,' not 'Captain.'"

"Hey, don't stress about it." 'I want it to come naturally,' Jim realized suddenly. 'I want him to call me Jim naturally, and have to remember to call me Captain.' He gave a quiet, hopeless laugh. 'Yeah, like that will ever happen.'

"What do you find amusing?" Spock asked curiously, tilting his head slightly.

"I, uh…nothing. It's nothing, Spock. Come on, let's get ready for bed."

Here we are, chapter one (or two, depending). I really like this one. I hope you did, too! Please review!

Live long and prosper,

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