When Snape practically fell out of the floo network, Dumbledore was rather startled. When Snape righted himself with an embarrassed cough and proceeded to one-handedly straighten his robes, Dumbledore was rather intrigued. When, finally, the Potions Professor stopped righting himself and turned to greet his baffled superior, Dumbledore was rather gobsmacked. For, there, in his greasy friend's ink-stained young hands, lay a large towel. A large, white, fluffy, beautiful towel embossed with the Malfoy crest. A large, white, fluffy, beautiful, Malfoy towel wrapped tightly around the wailing pink newborn snuggling into his normally rather unapproachable former student. Snape was scowling.
"Severus… you… whose…"
"Voldemort's. Bellatrix gave birth two hours ago. I was given it and told to dispose of it. Via you."
Dumbledore chuckled. "Via me. Well now that is a surprise."
He didn't sound a bit surprised.
"Now, tell me. How did you do it?"
Snape shrugged (well, as much as he could with his arms wrapped round an infant) and said, "He wanted to get rid of it. I provided him… with a secure option. He thinks you think it is a muggle."
"Which I do not."
"Of course."
There was an awkward pause.
"Will you?"
"What?"
"Take the thing." And, when Dumbledore reached out to take it; "No, not right now - I meant… well, alright – my arms are dropping off – but I meant overall."
He was met with a raised eyebrow.
"Overall?"
"As in… care for it. Generally."
"Oh?"
Snape growled. "Take the child! Now! Both literally and figuratively! And generally! I have other duties and homework to mark!"
Albus smiled. "I take it you want me to."
Severus glared. "Yes."
Albus took the child from him. Severus kept glaring.
"Lemon sherbet?"
"…"
"…?"
"No. Why would I want a lemon-"
"…"
"If I say yes, will you take the child?"
That infuriating twinkle again. Snape, looking deeply suspicious, took a lemon sherbet.
"Put it in your mouth."
"…will you take it?"
"…*twinkle twinkle*…"
"…fine."
Snape put it in his mouth. It made his eyes water. Albus chuckled.
"All this for an old man-"
"Shut up."
"But don't you want to hear whether I'm taking it or not?"
"I don't care. You will anyway."
"I did."
"Good."
And Severus marched out of the room.