High people! Here's the next chapter for "I Didn't Hear A Christmas Carol". Hope you enjoy!

I Didn't Hear A Christmas Carol

Upon leaving the counting house, the nephew let in two gentlemen. They both swept off their hats, and came forward. "Do I have the bad luck of addressing Mr. Scrooge or Mr. Marley?" one of them asked pleasantly. The other gentleman elbowed the first. "Oh! Sorry, about that… slip of the tongue, sir! It's just been a very long day, and I'm extremely tired," the first gentleman hastily apologized. "Why only this morning a boy tried to pick-pocket us, so I called the police and then…" The gentleman had started to ramble, but was interrupted mid-sentence by his companion. "He meant to say, does he have the good fortune of addressing Mr. Scrooge or Mr. Marley?"

"Mr. Marley has been dead for seven years. He died this very night, in fact," Scrooge replied.

"Oh! We are dreadfully sorry to hear that! We are collecting donations from rich business men like you, to give to the poor."

"Why would you want to do that? Waste of good money, if you ask me!"

"Ah, well, it's Christmas time, and we thought the poor might like some food and drink for a change."

"Can't they fend for themselves?"

"They try, sir."

"Are there no prisons?"

"Of course, or else we would be overrun by crime," said the confused gentleman.

"And the Union workhouses, are they still in operation?"

"They are, though I wish I could say they are not."

"The Treadmill and the Poor Law are in full operation?"

"Both very busy, sir."

"Oh, good! I was afraid for a moment that something had happened to them," Scrooge said with great relief. "They are very useful."

"But the people would never go there of their own will! They'd rather die!" the man defended.

"Well if they'd rather die, they'd better do it, and help solve the population problem." Scrooge felt like his neighborhood was too crowded. He heard the family next door's kids play all the time. It was very annoying.

"Oh, well um… So how much would you like us to put you down for?"

"Nothing."

"You wish to remain anonymous?" the man asked. He wasn't exactly the brightest character ever.

"No! I wish you people would leave me alone!"

"But sir!"

"I will not donate anything, so do as that sign says, and good afternoon gentlemen!" Scrooge said, indicating a sign that hung over his head. It said:

Warning: Do Not Ask Scrooge To Donate!

Seeing that it was useless to press their cause, the two disappointed gentlemen left. Having had enough for one day, Scrooge decided it was time to close. After everything was locked and put up for the night, the clerk and Scrooge stood outside and shared an awkward silence. The clerk didn't know what to say, and Scrooge wasn't much better off. Finally, Scrooge said, "I take it you'll want the day off tomorrow?"

"If it is convenient sir!" the clerk exclaimed eagerly.

"No it is not convenient! But it's not like I have much choice."

"It's only once a year, sir."

"What a great excuse," Scrooge grumbled sarcastically. "You may leave now, but be sure to arrive early the next day!"

"Y-yes sir!" the poor clerk stuttered, before hurrying off.

Scrooge sighed, then grabbing his cane and headed for his gloomy home. And so the adventure began, even though Scrooge had yet to know it.

Well, this chapter wasn't exactly funny, but it was necessary for the plot. The next chapter will be funnier. Please leave a review behind, and tell me what you think!