A tall, dark-skinned, deep-voiced, mustached news reporter stood in front of an old barn, ready to begin the day with the latest news story. "Good evening, Delmarva. I'm Jake Deepthroat with Channel 16. Tonight's top story, politics in Beach City are being shaken up as, sources are telling me, currently incumbent mayor Bill Dewey is facing a new opponent in his re-election campaign. Up until last week, Dewey was running unopposed. Just yesterday, however, Sussex County resident Peridot, who I've been told has no legal surname but goes by "Facet 2F5L, Cut-5XG", announced her intent to challenge the mayor in the upcoming election, making this statement from her campaign headquarters."

The news feed switched to footage from the previous day, where Peridot, flanked by Lapis Lazuli and Connie, stood at a podium in front of the barn, addressing a crowd of Beach City residents. "Bill Dewey is unqualified to run this civilization any longer," she said, sharply criticizing the mayor. "The human population of Beach City is in dire need of some proper leadership. And I know how to lead, okay? I ran a kindergarten, folks. I lead the Crystal Gems. I lead the Crystal Temps. And let me tell you, I can lead this city. So vote for me! Because I'll… I'll get stuff done. And stuff. Wow, speeches are tough."

The feed cut back to the reporter. "Shortly after the announcement, local pollsters began surveying citizens on her viability to run. 67% of those polled believe that a change was needed in Beach City's government, but only 12% of that 67% believe that Peridot is the change needed. The election is currently expected to be a landslide victory for Dewey, with the Delmarva Post posting 12 to 1 odds in Dewey's favor."

Peridot, Lapis, and Connie watched the report on the barn's television set. Peridot scoffed. "You'll see. You'll all see."

Connie sighed. "Peridot, those odds aren't looking good. Every poll in the area is posting really, really low approval ratings for you."

"The people just don't know what they're missing!" Peridot said enthusiastically. "Today, we're going to go into town and boost those numbers!"

"How are we going to do that?" Lapis asked.

Peridot marched over to a chalkboard and pushed it closer to her friends. Written on it were several different campaign slogans, which Peridot had evidently come up with the night before. "Okay. These are 'slogans'. They make people like you by exploiting their psychological weaknesses. So we're going to go down the list, and see which one causes the chemical imbalance that'll make people like me. Ok! First one!" Peridot cleared her throat. "'I'm With Her.'"

Connie tugged at her collar. "Oh, jeez," she muttered, unsure if she should tell Peridot how unfortunate that slogan was.

"Here's another one," Peridot continued. "'Make Planet Earth Great Again'."

Connie sighed. "Oh, jeez," she said again. "Peridot, both of those slogans are taken," she explained, fully intending to simply leave it at that. She really didn't want to explain to Peridot who had been using them.

"Oh, okay," Peridot said. "Well, I have more. Ahem. PERIDOT!" she yelled.

Connie was silent for a moment. "That's the entire slogan?" she asked finally.

"It's SO OBNOXIOUS that people can't help but think about it," Peridot explained. "We just yell it in their faces, and they'll think, 'wow, that was annoying. I should vote for her to get her to stop!'"

Peridot wasn't an idiot. Connie knew this. She was incredibly smart. Almost a genius, in fact. However, her gross misunderstanding of human psychology certainly could lead one to "misunderstand" Peridot's intelligence quotient. "You know, Peridot," Connie began, "maybe we should forget about slogans right now. Right now, we should think about your campaign at a more… basic level. What do you stand for? What are your platforms? Why do YOU want to be mayor, and why should the people elect YOU?"

Peridot scoffed. "Well. I mean. It's obvious. We need to allocate funds to rescue Steven."

"Right, right, but you can't just go out there and say 'I'm going to embezzle taxpayer money for a personal mission.'"

Peridot tilted her head. "Why not?"

"Because!" Connie said. "It doesn't sound good."

"But that's what politicians do."

"Well, YEAH, but they don't SAY that," Connie said. "You gotta say something that… you know. Makes the people root for you."

Peridot thought about it for a moment. "So… you want me to lie?"

"Re-word the truth. Put some sparkles on it. Make it… you know… likeable?"

Peridot thought about it again. "Instead of saying I need money…" Peridot began, "...I should say… My friend needs help."

"That's a start."

"I should say… Steven… is in serious danger. H-he might die," Peridot continued. "And the incumbent mayor doesn't care about that." Peridot noticed at this point that Connie had started filming her. "What are you doing?"

"Keep going!"

Peridot blinked. "Mayor Dewey… doesn't care about Steven. He doesn't care about the Crystal Gems, he doesn't care about Beach City, and he doesn't care about Earth. All he cares about is helping himself. And I think that's dumb." Her speech was becoming more impassioned. "I've only been on Earth for two revolutions, and even I know that when you're elected to an office like this? You're a civil servant. It's your DUTY to care about the people you've been elected to lead! If you don't… why are you even there in the first place?" She sighed and glanced aside. "On Homeworld, we didn't get a choice. We're grown. We work. We grow more gems. We colonize. The Diamonds do nothing for us in return. If this planet truly is the 'Land of the Free' and the 'Home of the Brave', then why does it seem like only the humans that act the most like tyrants and cowards get to call the shots? I'm… I'm not perfect. Nothing on this planet is. But I KNOW I have more respect for those around me than Mayor Doofy."

Connie closed her camera and nodded. "That was great, Peridot."

"Hey, wait, I had more," Peridot complained. "Ah, whatever, it's not important. What uh… What are you going to do with that?"

Connie had already pulled out her laptop and connected the camera to a USB port. "Peridot, you just made your first campaign ad. Congrats. You're a politician." She reached into her bag and pulled out two articles of clothing. "Red tie, or blue?"

Peridot, Connie, and Lapis walked through Beach City, Connie carrying a large stack of posters while Peridot scouted out the best locations to place said posters. It seemed as though Lapis wasn't contributing at all.

"Ok," Peridot said. "Right here, on the Big Donut's window. Humans eat, right? So a lot of them probably come here."

Lapis pressed her face up against the window to take a peek inside. "I thought somebody said it hasn't been open for a while."

Peridot hummed. "Hmmm. Yes. That might pose a problem. Connie! What do you know about food service?"

"I don't think that's how that works," Connie said, shooting down whatever idea Peridot had.

"Oh, fine," Peridot conceded. "Just put the poster up anyway and we'll move on. SOMEBODY's bound to see it."

Connie did as Peridot instructed and taped the poster to the window. It read:

PERIDOT 2K17

Register to vote now and vote Peridot for Mayor of Beach City!

Do it for Steven!

Accompanying the text was a drawing, done by Connie, of Peridot in a suit and tie, holding an American flag by the flagpole and standing triumphantly over a defeated Mayor Dewey.

Scrawled in small letters on the very bottom left corner of the poster were the slogans "I'm With Her," "Make Beach City Great Again," and "PERIDOT!", all of which were last-minute additions by the Gem in question.

"Perfect!" Peridot exclaimed, pleased with the poster. "Say, Connie, when is the election?"

Connie glanced her phone. "Five weeks."

Peridot's eyes widened. "Oh, jeez, we got some catching up to do if we're gonna hang all these posters up in time. Let's get a move on!" Peridot, Connie, and Lapis began to march away from the Big Donut, before hearing a set of keys jangle and enter the lock. The three turned around to see Sadie, dressed in her uniform. She started to push the door open before realizing they'd been staring at her.

"Oh. Hey," she said awkwardly. "Uh, you guys want anything? We're open for business."

Connie took a sip from a cup of cocoa as she, Peridot, and Lapis listened intently to Sadie's story. "After the ship left with Steven on it, I just felt kind of… worthless," she explained. "Then I realized Lars was still on it too. Sure, he'd been a big scaredy cat when that Gem attacked me, but…" she shook her head and looked down at the counter. "Anyway, losing two of my friends in one day while I was left to continue living, totally unharmed by what had happened was… it didn't feel good. So I stopped coming to work. What was the point? For a while, I didn't even want to get out of bed. I just kept thinking, 'why me? Why am I still here, and not out there?' The whole thing kind of really messed me up.

"Then I learned you were running against Mayor Dewey," she continued. "So I was like, 'oh, great, another Turd Sandwich has entered the race.' But then I saw the video you put out this morning. It helped me realize, that… I can't give up hope. Steven and Lars are still out there. I don't know if you'll actually be able to do anything to help them, I mean, let's be real here, what CAN you do? But, I mean, that speech still inspired me. Steven and Lars are still out there, and I know, deep down, that they'll be able to get themselves out of that mess. Steven's good at getting himself out of messes.

"And you're right. Dewey doesn't care about the people. Maybe you don't either. I don't know. You care about Steven at least. I can tell. So… maybe, through him, you care about us, too." Sadie looked back up at Peridot. "I turned 18 last year, but I didn't register to vote in time for the Presidential election. At the time, I was like, 'well, I don't like EITHER of these people, so what's the point?' I regret that a lot, now. It doesn't even matter WHO I would have voted for. I should have just VOTED. Even though I wouldn't have been able to change anything either way, I still had the chance to make my voice heard, and I didn't take it. There were a lot of disenfranchised people like me who just couldn't care less about who the President was, and that adds up. I'm not gonna make that mistake again. So, tomorrow, I'm registering. You have my vote, Peridot."

Peridot smiled. "Thanks, Sadie. I won't let you down."

Sadie sighed and arched her back, stretching for a moment before returning to lean on the counter. "But Peridot. Listen," she warned. "Dewey still has a LOT of support in Beach City. And he has a lot of Delmarva's big-name politicians behind him, too. This isn't going to be easy for you."

Peridot couldn't help but laugh. "Ha! 'Easy' is just another human word for 'boring'! If it's a fight he wants, it's a fight he'll get."

"Hey, you know what you should do?" Connie interrupted. "You should challenge him to a town hall debate! That'll expose more people to your cause, and you might even convince some people to switch sides!"

"Hmm. A debate. Interesting. On Homeworld, challenging the opinions of others was… well, deadly."

"You're not on Homeworld," Sadie pointed out. "You're living the American Dream, now, Peridot."

Bill Dewey sat at his desk, staring at a stack of papers he'd been handed earlier in the day. "Hmm. Crime is certainly down since the Nostalgia Riots. Now, how can I spin that and make it look like I did that?"

An aide entered the room. "Mayor, I think you should—"

"Not now, Karen, I'm busy."

"I REALLY think you should watch the news. This affects YOU."

Dewey sighed. "Fine. What channel?"

"CBS, sir."

Dewey flipped on the portable television on his desk and switched the channel to channel 16. "You're watching WBOC News; Delmarva's News Leader!"

The news anchor sat at his desk, straightening a stack of papers. "For those just tuning in, we're bringing you live coverage of Beach City's 2017 mayoral election as it happens. We go now to our correspondent in the area, Jake Deepthroat. Jake?"

"Thanks Tom. Folks, I'm standing here in an unincorporated rural community in Sussex County, where I reported earlier today on the budding political career of a woman known simply as Peridot. Behind me is the self-declared, independent mayoral candidate's place of residence, a barn owned by Beach City's Greg Universe, which also serves as Peridot's campaign headquarters." The cameraman zoomed and refocused on the barn, which could be seen over Jake's shoulder. "Earlier this morning, the candidate released a short, budgetless video on the popular video sharing site 'YouTube', where she sharply criticized the incumbent mayor and paid tribute to an apparently lost friend of hers.

"Just a few moments ago, I sat down with Peridot, who had some rather interesting things to say about her role in Beach City's political world."

The feed switched to an interview shot minutes prior, where Peridot addressed Jake, flanked by Connie and Lapis. "You know, Jake, really, what this is all about, is the 'American Dream'," she said. "Where I come from, doing what I'm doing now would be labeled treason. But here, in this particular region of the planet, it's the norm. Any old Average Joe can, you know, wake up one day, and say, 'things suck and I want to make them better,' and I, you know, I think there's something really beautiful about that."

Mayor Dewey rolled his eyes. How pretentious, he thought.

Jake leaned forward. "With the state of American politics today, with how divided this country is on several key issues, do you think you can bring the people of Beach City together under one cause?"

"I do, Jake. I do," Peridot responded. "You know, my ideas are very universal. I want the town to succeed. And we all have different definitions of 'success', so it's tough. I need to get opinions on the issues. It's really all about what the PEOPLE want, because what I want is for everyone else to get what they want. And to defeat Bill Dewey. Both of these things are very important to me.

"To that end, I will be challenging Dewey to a town hall debate next Wednesday, where the people of Beach City can get to know us and get to know our stances on the issues. Unity through diversity, I think, is what I want to focus on. How we approach that is up to the people, obviously, they're the ones asking the questions." She paused for a moment. "I'm trying to sound super professional right now, and honestly it's kind of boring and it feels dishonest. Really, I just want to curb stomp Dewey into the dirt. For Steven Universe. That's what this is all about."

Dewey blinked. A debate, eh? he thought, before smirking. He supposed it couldn't hurt. After all, he was a seasoned politician. Peridot could barely hold an interview. This was going to be so easy. Game on, Peridot. Game on.

A/N: This chapter was a weird outlier because I'm pretty sure it's gonna be one of the only ones where I don't have a more recent episode of the show to work off of. It's also really more of a set-up. The next one is gonna be weird too because Wanted doesn't air until Monday so I'll either have to wait until then to start writing (very bad (or sick)) or find some way to fit those episodes into the narrative (supposing Steven and Lars even get back to Earth after just a few episodes).

That's… just kind of what happens when you write weekly AND try to adapt to the source material as it comes out. With Memberries it was easier because I could play with current events and the show was on a hiatus for most of that time anyway so I didn't have to worry about new developments.

...also, sorry if this chapter comes off as preachy. Without getting too much into the actual political details, I identify with Sadie a lot here because I just sort of really hated both of the major Presidential candidates last year and didn't really feel like there was a point in choosing between a douche and a turd (although I did eventually end up voting because I personally feel like it's important to make your voice heard, even if your voice is "if I HAD to pick one, it would be this one").