1 July

Blast it. Even Dudley gets phone calls. I wish my friends knew how to operate Muggle phones. Hang on, Hermione does. This is depressing me. Maybe I'll go watch Japanese Anime, HGTV, or C-Span, depending on who has the telly now.

Later

C-Span is so boring.

2 July

Petunia made meatloaf. I refused to eat it, so Vernon punished me by locking me in my room and turning off my air conditioning.

Later

It is so bloody hot in here.

Later later

Hedwig is sick.

Even later later

Ew. Owl pellets.

4 July

Wow. American Independence Day. Wish I had a tad of independence. Even Peeves would be good company now. Hedwig threw her feathers all over. It smells funny in here.

Later

Oh say can you sing by Don's earning light was to certain poor shepherds asleep in the night.

Hang on, that's not right.

Later later

Oh say can you sing by Don's earning light. Twas proudly we hailed.

Even later

Twilights gleaming.

Even later later

I like Coldplay.

I'm hungry. Perhaps I will make myself some spinach dip and a loaf of sourdough bread.

It is so hot in here I have resorted to turning a pair of Dudley's old pants into cutoff shorts for me.

6 July

Look, over there, Harry flipped his hair! Heheheh!

Later

Yesterday I was really craving an egg salad sandwich. So I made one. But we didn't have any bread. So I gave it to Hedwig.

Later later

Hedwig spit my egg salad into my face.

7 July

Why oh why does Aunt Petunia have to make meatloaf every week? And why do I keep talking about food? Actually studied today. That shows my boredom.

Later

Wish someone would write me besides myself.

Later 2

I think Hedwig is dead.

Later 3

She left a note. At least someone's written to me now.

Harry, I can't go on with you anymore. Your boredom and depression have put me over the edge. I am not dead; I've only gone away for a while. Well, maybe for forever. I would like to settle down with Errol and have a few chicks before it gets too late. I hope you and the Weasleys will understand. –Hedwig

I've gone completely mad.

9 July

Got a letter from Ron.

Hey Mate! So I guess Hedwig and Errol are a thing. Bloody hilarious! Well Hermione just got here. When will you be here? Well write back. We kind of miss you! –Ron

I think I am going to cry.

Later

Ron is a really messy writer. At least MY handwriting is LEGIBLE. Who needs him? Who needs Hedwig? Who needs Cho?

Later later

Hang on, I do.

Later later

I suspect Ron and Hermione have a thing. She always has to arrive way before me to the Weasleys'. They're probably doing it right now instead of writing to me. I think I'm gonna be sick.

Later later

IT'S NOT FAIR.

Later

I just finished reading an edition of Chicken Soup for the Mother & Daughter Soul. I cried the whole time. It reminded me so much of how I never had a mother to teach me all the things I need to know, like how to cook, sew, clean, pick out a wedding dress, have babies… It is so sad.

My slobber is a bit chocolaty on account of just eating a Tootsie Roll. I hope Dudley doesn't miss it. Well, going to watch Maid in Manhattan.

10 July

I really don't know how Ron expects me to write back, on account of Hedwig leaving me. I guess I'm stuck here forever. All this Muggle stuff is getting to me. Movies and books and all that stuff. Not enough magic around me. I think I have ADD. I'm craving a pastry.

Later

I sneaked down for a cake. Petunia caught me and poured her tea all over my head.

Later later

Hedwig came back, but only to steal my bread crumbs and leave pellets. I just might kill myself.

Dear Diary, and anyone one of you who care about me enough to read this. I'm going to kill myself. Now I just have to figure out how…

11 July

Actually I never got around to killing myself because I fell asleep watching reruns of Everybody Loves Raymond. And now I'm not in the mood to kill myself.

Oh well.

Later

France's Independence Day thing is today.

Later again

I bet Ron and Hermione are having loads of fun and sex without me. Damn them.

Later again X 2

Bad images.

13 July

I slept all day yesterday.

14 July

Why do they give us homework during summer? My home is Hogwarts! Waahh! Why am I FAMOUS? Bloody VOLDEMORT!

Later

I pulled out my old Quidditch magazines from under my mattress. I spent hours paging through them. I probably spent an entire hour on this one picture of Krum. He is so muscular I can't believe it. I wish I had those nice ripped muscles, glistening under his sweat. He wipes his forehead with the back of his large strong hand…

I think I'll have a spot of fruitcake.

Later

Still eating fruitcake. Thinking of Krum. I am so jealous that Hermione went with him. Hang on, what the bloody hell am I talking about? I mean I'm jealous that Cedric got Cho.

I learned something interesting but I seem to have forgotten it.

I'll compose a list: C's: Coldplay, Chudley Cannons. Cho. Chang. Cake. Cedric. Cosmopolitan. Casablanca. Chums. Collin. Creevy. Casper the Ghost. Care bears.

15 July

… Nothing to write.

Later

"

Later later

"

Later later later

Wish I could speed up time. Wonder what the spell would be… Acceleratime? Sure.

16 July

Home is bad. All I have is food. It seems as though Petunia and Vernon have forgotten the combination on the lock of the fridge, because they took it off.

Cantaloupe, here I come!

Later

More C's: Cantaloupe. Cats. Candles.

Later later

I really like candles.

Later X 3

M's: Money. Magic. Monopoly. Muggles.

10 July

Losing track of time… Wish Hedwig would come back. What day do we go back to school again? I'm delirious.

16 July

31-1615 days until my birthday.

I do hope someone comes to rescue me. I've been practicing moving my mouth around different ways in the mirror. I can never understand a word Johnny Depp says in Pirates of the Caribbean. I've been practicing talking like him and moving my mouth around different ways.

"My darling Cho, I have everything in the world: fame, fortune, loads of Quidditch talent, looks—only, I don't have you."

"I can't breathe."

"Oh Cho Cho CHO!"

17 July

I think I should become an artist.

Later

L's (things I like): Lunch. Lingerie. Legolas. Lamp.

Later X 2

I got a letter from Hermione today.

Dear Harry, Of course I am having loads of fun with the Weasleys. But we are growing somewhat worried about you. Why aren't you writing back? Well, anyway, back to having fun! –Hermione

I CAN'T BLOODY WRITE BACK BECAUSE MY BLOODY OWL ELOPED! Ooh, cookes!

Later X 3

I wonder if Cho thinks about me as much as I think about her.

Later X 4

I stubbed my toe.

18 July

I miss Hagrid.

19 July

If I had a bloody owl to send a bloody letter to Ron and Hermione:

Dear Ron and Hermione, I have no bloody owl to send you a bloody letter! Besides, I'm sure you're having much more fun TOGETHER without me. Don't forget to use protection.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Later

I punched a hole through my wall. I can see into Dudley's room now.

Later again.

I've patched up the wall. Turns out being able to see into Dudley's room wasn't beneficial anyway.

Later

You should see (you should see) what's on HGTV!

21 July

Now I wish I hadn't patched that hole. Maybe I could have watched Dudley play video games.

23 July

Little more than a week until I get my letter from Hogwarts. If they remember me. Why doe Dumb-Dumbledore send me here every summer? 2 months seems like 2 years.

26 July

I lost my journal for a few days. I was sad.

27 July

Grrr I am so angry at Ron and Hermione.

Later

I got a paper cut.

30 July

Nothing interesting to write about… So I didn't… And wont' come to think of it.

31 July

Finally got my letter. What good it is that I can't go to Diagon Alley for my books. And I doubt Vernon and Petunia will take me to the train station. At least they got me a birthday present. A dead twig infested with bugs.

Later

Happy birthday to me. Ron and Hermione sent me a measley card and cake and a really cool Quidditch book and some candy.

That's it.

Later later

Hedwig stopped by to retrieve her food dish.