a n d t h e n t h e r e w e r e t h r e e

Author's Note: It's late. I'm listening to beautiful, slow music. I couldn't come up with a good ending for this chapter. I apologize. Other than that, I'm decently satisfied with it. It gets a little more into the conflict than the introduction, I hope.

Dedications: Thanks a whoooole bunch to FunkyFiction for the timely review. It's thanks to this wonderful author and reader that you are all treated to this chapter. Please review! I don't post until someone is awesome enough to review. This chapter's also dedicated to my wonderfully loyal beta, TuRtLe88. As my thanks to her, I will ask that you all go take a look at her stuff. James Potter is not Dead is my personal favorite. Of course, I'm sure I'll end up thanking her plenty more in the future.

Disclaimer: I really don't own much any of the stuff in this chapter. I don't own any characters. I don't own the various brand names mentioned, like Aspirin and Tylenol. I also don't own that little boy cat (that's not really a boy).

Apology: I apologize for that really bad Psych reference right there, with the little boy cat, but it's too late to apologize. I also dearly regret that OneRepulic reference. I should stop while I'm ahead. GO! READ!

Chapter One

Oh My

"James…" Lily sat up slowly from her place on the floor, cautious of her already apparent hangover. "What the bloody hell did you do?" Turns out having sex on a hard wood floor wasn't a great idea. Lily felt like her entire body was hung over, not just her brain.

"Mmm?" James curled up in a ball, obviously not wanting to get up. Lily tried to think without his help. They had celebrated, right? Right after graduation, she and James had gone out to a Muggle bar, "to change things up a little bit." That, and Hogs Head and Three Broomsticks were bound to be crowded with other graduated

They must have gotten drunk. The hangover made this much apparent to Lily, and she deduced from their general lack of clothes that they had had sex.

That wouldn't be a huge deal if Lily knew for sure that James had used a condom. She leaned over and shook him. "James," she whispered, for his benefit as well as her own.

"James Potter, you had better tell me that you used a condom last night."

"How the hell am I supposed to remember?" He rolled over and glared. "But I'm gonna go with probably no…I don't see a used one around…"

Lily groaned and rolled over, pulling herself off the floor. She went to the entryway where they had sent their luggage from Hogwarts the other day before heading off to celebrate. She pulled a change of clothes out, got dressed, and sat down on the floor to write a letter.

Sev,

Hey, remember how you told me that you'd help me if I needed it? Could I get you to send me a pregnancy test potion (whatever version strikes your fancy; I'm not picky)? I'll explain later in person if you'd like me to.

Also, James and I are having a housewarming party on July 15, if you'd like to come. Party starts at 3:00, no gifts necessary. It's totally casual, don't worry about a thing. I really hope you'll come, and don't worry about James.

Miss you,

Lil

She looked over to James, who had fallen back asleep, and rolled her eyes. Severus would understand her request, and he'd be happy to help. She was lucky to have him as a friend. She rolled her parchment up and sent her owl, Rowena (A/N: maybe I'll post a special chapter sometime of the story behind the name…), and went to bring her suitcase up to her room in the house.

When she came back down, James was still asleep on the floor, not that he had much of a choice for surfaces, but Sirius's face was in the Floo.

"Oy! Mate! Wakey wakey!--Ah, the gorgeous Lily Evans emerges." Sirius spotted her coming down the stairs, and smiled. From the way his head bobbed, Lily guessed that he was attempting a bow.

She tried her hardest to keep the sour look off her face. Sure, she had come around to James (really come around), but she still found Sirius immature and brash.

"Hello, Sirius." She knelt down. "James is asleep. Hung over, so it'll be a while before he's awake. I'll have him Floo you later. Now, if you don't mind, I was on my way somewhere."

"So you two partied it up last night! I still can't believe you wouldn't let me and Remie join you." Sirius entirely disregarded her request. "And you shagged to sum the night up, as far as I can deduce from James's white little arse hanging out of those blankets."

"Oh, you and Remus are grateful you had time to yourself, don't deny it." Lily couldn't help the jest. "Now, please, the Floo?"

"Why don't you just apparate?"

"Honestly, I'm too hung over."

"All right, as long as you can admit it. Remember to have James Floo me."

"Right."

Sirius's face disappeared, and Lily put the fire out to make sure he didn't come back. She scribbled a quick note to James, "Floo Sirius back," and got her own Floo powder from her luggage.

"Evans house," she said, letting her arm drop the powder into the rekindled fire. She stepped through, ready to just slump down on a couch in her simple, Muggle living room in her simple, Muggle home, but her plans changed when she noticed who waited to greet her.

Her parents and sister were sitting with another suburban Muggle couple. Every single person was dressed nicely; one party was kissing the other's arse. Mr. and Mrs. Evans were hosting, so Lily could deduce through her hang over that they were the arse-kissers.

And every single person was looking at Lily.

"Oh my," her mother said.

"Oh god," her father said.

Petunia's eyes widened, and her head turned to watch the guests' reactions.

"Richard…?" The other man gave her father a wary look.

"Oh my," her mother repeated.

The visiting woman started her first impression with a glare that said, almost verbatim, "what are you thinking?," but she seemed to remember to be surprised, and muttered, "oh my."

"Shite," Lily walked into the kitchen, where she slumped down on the floor, a place she was getting tired of, and leaned her head back against the refrigerator.

Lily's mother came in the kitchen, and sat down on the floor with her daughter. Mrs. Evans was that sort of mother. Sure, she was a presentable suburban Muggle, but she also found it natural to sit on the kitchen floor when her daughter's obvious troubles required it.

Lily turned to her mother's face, and laid her head on the welcoming shoulder.

"I'm sorry. I'll contact someone for a memory charm."

"It's okay. Can I get you anything right now?"

"Aspirin?" Since Lily had been raised on Muggle medicines and drugs, her system was able to cope. Some drugs were even more effective than potions, and Lily found herself coming back home for Aspirin and Tylenol more than anything else.

Her mom nodded and stood, producing two pills and a cup of water for Lily, who gratefully took them both.

"I just came to get some more of my stuff," Lily stood up. "I should have called ahead, I'm sorry."

"As long as ­­­the Ministry sends someone down about Mr. Peterson's memory, everything will be fine."

"So, who are they?" Lily started with her things in the kitchen, pulling a brown paper grocery bag from the cupboard under the sink, and loading her various pens, notebooks and cookbooks into it.

"Mr. Peterson is a potential client of your father's." Mr. Evans was a real estate agent, and the Evans had hosted plenty of dinners before for clients, so Lily wasn't surprised.

"What about Mrs. Peterson? She knows, doesn't she? About the Other London." Lily had adopted this euphemism for the Magical World, due to Petunia's adversion.

"Not that I know of, but she didn't seem too surprised, did she?"

"No," Lily paused in her packing to think to herself.

Once Lily had written a letter to the Ministry of Magic and sent it using the emergency owl her parents kept around, she finished packing and said her goodbyes. She considered leaving through the door, but after considering the Petersons, who had been quiet since her entrance, she left via Floo.

"Potter and Evans, Godric's Hollow." It was a long address, but neither James nor Lily had been able to compromise on anything else.

--

James woke up sometime an hour or so after Lily left, slowly. James had more tolerance for alcohol than Lily, and had less of a hangover. This advantage allowed him to cheerily get dressed, and make breakfast. He put eggs in to hard boil, and had gone back to the living room to clean up the mess they had made the previous night when he found Lily's note.

He smiled, and went over to the Floo, intending to contact Sirius with all details from last night.

Just as he was prepared to throw the Floo powder down and stick his head through, the fire place lit up green. James found himself face-to-beak with Severus Snape. He jerked his head back in surprise.

I wonder what would happen if we had thrown the Floo at the same time…I'll have to try it with Sirius sometime. James vaguely mused to himself before greeting the caller.

"Lily's out at her parent's."

"Oh."

"Sorry."

"Would you inform her that I'll send the requested effects this evening?, and that I," James almost heard a "reluctantly" inserted here, "Agree to the latter half of her letter?"

"Of course." James conformed to the predetermined template of formality. "So long."

Severus's head flickered out of the fire, and James scrawled a note as much to himself as to Lily, not trusting himself to remember the entire verbose message.

Once the note was written, James Flooed his head to the fire place in Sirius's bedroom, which had been surreptitiously connected to the Floo Network summer after the boys' first year.

"Snuffles!" James called out to Sirius's form on the bed. The latter boy looked up from his reading material hopefully, and crawled over to the foot of his bed to see the fireplace.

"Without school, I find myself extremely bored." Sirius grinned at his best friend. "And inadequately exposed to my friends. How are you, mate? How was last night?" He winked.

"Good to see you! Even better to see you slacking. I feel like it's been a year since we were in school. I'm great. Last night was great. I think. What happened, again?"

Both boys chuckled at James's stupidity, and started up their small-talk and gossiping session. Remus had often told the two that they have a nattered as much as girls.

"Your girlfriend was a mess this morning when I Flooed," Sirius smiled, meaning well.

"I think I might've gotten her pregnant, Siri," James's face was completely straight.

"Oh hell." Sirius met James's eyes.

"Yea."

"Well, you should like…figure out for sure."

"I think she mailed Snape for a potion this morning. He Flooed just now to tell her that whatever it was she asked for would come this evening."

Sirius mmmed quietly to himself, not quite knowing what to say. I won't lie to you and say that they were constantly on the exact same wavelength. They didn't always know the perfect thing to say to everything, especially in terra incognita such as this, but all that mattered was that they didn't expect that of each other.

They sat in contemplative silence for a while before starting up a new topic: their freedom from Professor Binns.

---

Second AN: You know what I just noticed? They still haven't used any magic, other than Flooing. Perhaps I should focus a little bit more on what's going on in the Magical World than whether or not Lily's pregnant. If you haven't guessed the answer to that yet, I sincerely apologize. (okay, FYI, I wrote that before I wrote my apology note at the top. Am I the only one who's finding this comment ironic? or is it just stupid?)

Once again, I'd like to remind everyone to review! This chapter got out quickly because I got a hugely helpful review, and I'd like to keep that trend.

Love Anaguma Conscience