Is the word I use to describe you

Weasley1200

Passionately? I meant STEAMY! I've never been kissed like this in my ENTIRE LIFE! Well, I've only kissed maybe like what, 3 guys before? But this kiss...was something completely different! It was amazing. So here I was, bra less, but not panty less...yet. How far were we going to go with experimenting? Who knows. I was mentally crossing my fingers that we'd go farther. Suddenly he stops. No no nooooooooooo! Not yet. Not when it's getting quite good!

"What am I doing?" He says.

"Kissing me? Please don't stop...please." My eyes beg him to not stop.

"Bella...this could get dangerous. We had an agreement remember?" He looks down at me sadly.

"Yeah, we did, but this feels too damn good to care about...agreements" He suddenly looks annoyed, almost angry.

"Don't be selfish Bella." Ummmm.

"How the hell am I being selfish? You're the one who was kissing me...like...that." I was feeling woozy remembering how he had kissed me. I began to blush and it was creeping up and down my body. My cheeks felt red hot. He must of noticed it too because I saw the tiniest start of a smirk develop on his lips.

"My blushing bride." He says with such love. I cringe at the word "bride".

"Ack, please don't say that..." He has one of Edward sighs and starts to get up off of me. I miss the stone coldness of his torso on mine. I knew that struck a nerve. I don't know WHY I had to be like that. I mean, I definitely wanted to spend the rest of my forever life with him. But like, WHY must we be married...why can't we just be together and have making out sessions like normal boyfriend and girlfriends do? Everything is always so complicated with Edward.

He turns around and grabs his jeans and shirt. I never even got to see the good stuff. I suppose all in good time. I suddenly feel like crying. This always happens. We play around for a little bit and then he stops...always. This time we got farther than the last time. This was quite possibly the first and hopefully not the last time I got to see Edward in JUST his boxers.

His clothes are on in like...half a second and I'm still sitting like a dummy on a log on his bed, bra less and shattered.

"Please don't look at me like that.." I can't help it. Why can't we just...do things and not stop. I think we both deserve some fun. I do my traditional Bella Swan huff, grab my clothes and enter his bathroom. I sit on the floor. I don't know why. Why am I throwing such a hissy fit? I hear a knock on the door.

"Bella..." He says in a soft voice. "Please don't hide from me again." Again. This happens too frequently. I wash my tear stained face and put my clothes on. I'm about to go back to his room when suddenly I hear my song being played on the piano downstairs. I feel embarrassed. Sometimes I feel like I don't deserve Edward at all. He always knew what to do to make me at ease and to forget about what I was angry at. I open the bathroom door and am greeted by Edward sitting on his bed, well my bed, our bed? He was smiling. How the?? I don't know why I even stand amazed at his zippy techniques. I had just heard the song being played right? Downstairs...That's like...2 seconds it took for me to open the door...oh nevermind.

"Hello princess. Are you done being mad at me?" I need to grow up. I'm an 18 year old woman and I'm still throwing fits like a 7 year old.

"Yes, I'm sorry." I said that a little too sardonically. He stands up and walks over to me. He pauses.

"We need to control ourselves. I promised I'd try Bella...when we're married. I meant it. I just don't want to go overboard with these little "sessions" and lose control with you. Do you understand?" I nod. He hugs me. DDSS. Different day same shit. Why am I so selfish? As he's still hugging me, I glance out his window to the outside world. As we stand there, millions of couples around the world are enjoying themselves. Humans enjoying themselves. Humans who can breathe, have a heart, make passionate love without the thought of "oops I just crushed you, my bad!". Millions of couples out there this second, they were so lucky. I felt trapped. Isn't that a horrible thought? I loved Edward with all my heart but sometimes, I wish he WAS human and not a monster...my patience was almost running out. The wedding was only a few weeks away...

A/N- I know it's short! I promise the next will be long and more...detailed. I just wanted something out there for you guys to read! I'm happy I have so many people who have added me to the author alerts, favorite authors, favorite stories thingy. I'm flattered! Everyone have a great Tuesday!

Weasley1200