Chapter 2

Rage Against the Night

Sam had been possessed before, by angels and demons alike, but this was so very different. Those instances had been perverse violations. Lucifer's time within Sam's skin had been made all the worse because he was there on Sam's invitation, and the archangel took great joy in reminding him of that fact. There had been coldness and cruelty and all manner of horrible things, and there were days, even now, where he swore he could still feel the chill of Lucifer's grace tearing into him.

But being Gadreel's vessel was nothing like that at all.

Willingly, Gadreel became an open book to Sam, which was terrifying in a different way.

Because Sam had requested it, he told his tale and held nothing back, and Sam felt he could drown in the ocean of regret that the angel harbored within him. His history, his hopes, his crimes, the torture he had endured, all of it was laid bare and presented to Sam. Gadreel gave it all, to the point that the angel gave Sam the impression that if he demanded Gadreel's life as retribution for his past, then there was a very real chance that Gadreel would have gladly handed over his own blade and submit himself to Sam's judgment.

All because Gabriel had once taken a shine to Sam.

And whatever the Archangel had left behind was worth everything in Gadreel's eyes. It meant so much to him that he felt inclined to ally himself with Sam, even knowing that his exposure to other angels was inevitable.

Gadreel tried explaining it. Tried to explain the thread around his soul that apparently marked him as protected, as trusted. He had tried to explain that he had one as well, a gift given to him eons ago and how it helped to save him from himself.

But most days Sam had a hard time seeing how he was worth all that.

When Sam was less than generous he wondered if to be favored by Gabriel was to suffer. Because sometimes that is all Sam believed he and Gadreel got from it. Pain and torture at the hands of others, punished for doing what they believed to be the right thing.

And completely unable to see the value within themselves.

But Sam knew that wasn't fair, and he would immediately feel guilty for entertaining the thought.

Because even after all this time, Sam never forgot Gabriel's last message to the world. To Sam himself, and by extension, to Gadreel. For all his character flaws, Sam truly believed that Gabriel felt regret for not doing more.

Always too late to help anyone worth a damn.

Sam knew how the host viewed Gadreel. Sam also knew firsthand how cruel Angels could be to those they think wronged them, and right now they were already furious with one angel allied with the Winchesters. A second one would only be a convenient target to vent their anger.

Gabriel was gone.

But Sam was still here.

They were still here. They were still alive, and if Gadreel made it his mission to be Sam's personal guardian, then it was only fair that Sam did the same.

It took some doing, but Sam convinced Dean to keep quiet about Gadreel. About his name and about how exactly he was helping Sam.

Dean didn't like it, and he liked it even less when he learned that the angel now residing in his brother had already lied to him. But Sam was able to make him bend, at least for now, and it had to be enough.

When they went to retrieve Cas, they fed him the story that Ezekiel somehow got Sam up and running before pulling a runner himself. It was flimsy at best, but given that Cas was currently human, he wasn't able to spot the lie at a glance.

It would at least buy Gadreel time to heal them both.

He hoped it was enough.

It had to be enough.

oOoOo

Weeks passed. Then months.

Sam had come to rely on the steady presence of Gadreel. Though dormant most of the time, Gadreel would often make appearances during moments of high stress. Threats to Sam were often neutralized with a deadly efficiency, and if Sam didn't have a direct line into the angel's head, it would have been more than a little terrifying. He had come to rely on him, and the reassurance that there was another hunting partner watching his back.

If he was suddenly injured, or rendered unconscious, he knew Gadreel would be there, ready to step in as needed. Gadreel was always ready to help.

But not now.

Right now, Sam was alone.

Cas was off chasing down Dean.

Dean, who apparently did something monumentally stupid for a shot at Abbadon. But not before his suspicion and mistrust drove Gadreel from Sam. Before either of them were willing or ready, Dean had ripped them away from each other.

So when Metatron's lackeys came for Kevin, Sam had been alone.

And he had been outnumbered when the angels came.

Sam was alone, and he was bleeding, and holding Kevin's body, and he knew it was bad, and that there was nothing he could do.

So he prayed.

He was bleeding onto the floor of the bunker and he prayed. Prayed for Dean, and Cas. For Gadreel. For someone to help, although it was far too late for Kevin. Kevin's eyes were gone and his body had cooled against Sam's and-

And Sam was alone.

Until he wasn't.

Gentle hands touched him, and a soft voice murmured in his ear, all sorrow and remorse. The warm spread of familiar grace healed his wounds even as arms moved in to share the burden of Kevin's body.

Gadreel was here, and together they built a pyre to give Kevin a hunter's funeral.

They stood there, shoulder to shoulder as the smoke drifted into the sky. Together they watched the flames, and all Sam could think of was how sick and tired he was of losing family.

"I am so sorry, Sam," Gadreel breathed, voice barely above a whisper. "I did not return fast enough. I failed you."

"No." Sam's voice came out sharper than he intended, startling them both. He sniffed and shook his head, and tried again, softer this time. "No. This isn't on you. This isn't on either of us. And besides, you . . . you made it back."

I'm glad you're home, he wanted to say. I'm glad you're still alive.

But he was still too raw from everything, and the words refused to come.

When Gadreel's fingers twined with his and refused to let go, Sam thought he might have heard it anyway.

Days later an angry Castiel and a disgruntled Dean eventually returned to the bunker, only to stare in shocked silence at what greeted them. Kevin's pyre had long since burnt out and Sam and Gadreel had put the bunker back to rights, but evidence still remained. Sam had managed to take out two of the angels before banishing those that remained. Sam hadn't gotten around to removing the imprints of wings spread across the table of the war room, so that was the first thing that greeted them when they walked through the door.

Neither of them expected to see Gadreel standing beside Sam.

But after Sam was done saying his piece, neither of them thought of separating the two again.

oOoOo

So much more happened during that time, but really, it broke down to four major events.

Dean took the Mark of Cain.

Abaddon fell under Dean and the First Blade.

Cas raised an army, which in turn led to Metatron's imprisonment.

Then Dean died, and woke up as the newest Knight of Hell.

oOoOo

Gadreel was certain that he was the primary thing keeping Sam from flying off into the abyss. Castiel too, for that matter, but the other angel was still holding Gadreel at a distance and therefore leaned on him far less. Both of them had become so driven to find Dean that they lost track of most other things. Gadreel helped, how and when he could, but he knew neither of them would truly rest until Dean was found.

There were endless nights of research and chasing leads and it seemed that with every dead end they came to, they became a little more desperate.

Sam began to drink more, seemingly unable to sleep without it some nights. Gadreel worried, even after Castiel's assurance that this was a normal coping mechanism for the Winchesters. But just because it was normal, did not mean that it was healthy.

Then there came a night where Sam got so drunk that Gadreel had to help him back to his room. Sam kept insisting that he was fine all the way back to his quarters, even as he stumbled over his own feet. Gadreel remained close, keeping Sam steady and vertical as he all but carried him down the hall. After depositing him gently onto the bed and removing his boots, Gadreel had bid Sam a good night and turned to leave.

He was halted by a hand on his wrist.

Gadreel may have only been invited into Sam's life by necessity, and the mutual memory of Gabriel, but Gadreel remained for his own reasons. After becoming a part of Sam's life, Gadreel believed he knew what had drawn Gabriel to the boy in the first place.

Sam was strong, of that there was no question. He was also intelligent and compassionate, and so very stubborn. But all of those things were nothing compared to his loyalty. In defense of his loved ones Sam could be vicious and tenacious, and Father help anyone who wronged those he cared for. But there were so very few people that Sam gave his loyalty to.

To his brother, of course, and to Castiel. And now to Gadreel himself.

But this was new.

Sam lay on his side, expression open and vulnerable, and his eyes pleading up at Gadreel through tousled hair. He tugged gently, coaxing Gadreel back towards the bed.

"Stay?" He pleaded, alcohol still affecting his speech, but not his awareness. "Don't leave yet. Just stay. Please."

He had seen Sam's loyalty, but this, this was Sam's trust.

Accepting it for the gift it was, Gadreel allowed himself to be tugged closer to the bed. He paused long enough to remove his shoes before settling himself beside Sam. He made himself comfortable against the headboard as Sam threw an arm over Gadreel's thighs, fingers digging into denim, and his face burying against his hip.

"Rest, Sam," Gadreel told him softly as he ran a hand through his hair. He was rewarded with a low sigh, and so he repeated the motion until Sam sank against him completely. "Rest," he repeated. "I'll keep watch."

That night was the first time Gadreel spent the night in Sam's bed.

But it would not be the last.

Some night's would be just like the first, no more than an innocent exchange of comfort and companionship. Over time Sam grew more bold, and the encounters became more intimate.

Gadreel knew it was unintentional at first. Sam was a restless sleeper and sometimes his hands would wander. Long finger would search out skin, skimming under clothes and pulling their bodies closer together, seeking out warmth and comfort as he dreamed.

Then Sam woke one morning, hands wrapped around and under Gadreel's back. Sam's face had been nuzzled against the hollow of his throat and their legs had become hopelessly tangled together. Sam had mumbled an apology, embarrassed, and made to pull away.

Gadreel stopped him, stilling him with a hand on his jaw, thumb tracing the line of his cheekbone.

"I will leave if you would like me to. I will not be upset," Gadreel told him. Because it was true and needed to be said. "But I am right where I want to be. I never want you to doubt that."

This was the first selfish Gadreel had ever wanted for himself. He wanted to remain by Sam's side. As a companion, as a lover, if Sam would let him. But only if Sam wanted the same.

"Everyone leaves," was Sam's hoarse reply, and if Sam hadn't once been his vessel, Gadreel might have missed the true meaning hidden there.

"Never by choice," Gadreel vowed, sealing the words with a slow kiss.

Because this is where he belonged.

All his mistakes, all his crimes, he would do them all again if the alternative meant never knowing Sam Winchester.

oOoOo

They found Dean, and restored his humanity, But the Mark remained.

Gadreel was not as old as some angels, but he was older than most. He was old enough to remember that the Mark originally belonged to Lucifer. He knew it held some sort of importance, but whatever it was, it had remained a closely guarded secret between the archangels. But even then, it was obvious that it was powerful and dangerous.

Nothing good could come from the Mark's removal.

He knew this, but still he researched right along with Sam and Castiel behind Dean's back. He knew that they would stop at nothing to save Dean from himself, and so he did his part to assist them. He offered his knowledge, as little as it was, and prepared for the worst, should it come to pass.

After all, they were all in this together.

Sam, Dean, and Castiel, they were his family now.

And he would do everything within his power to keep them together for as long as possible.

They found a way to remove the Mark. Of course they did.

But it came at a cost.

Gadreel almost lost Sam for good at the hands of Dean and Death. The witch Rowena had escaped with the Book of the Damned, but not before she had crippled Gadreel and cursed Castiel with dark magic, leaving him weak and powerfully violent in turns.

Yes, they found a way to free Dean Winchester from the Mark of Cain.

But because of them the Darkness was unleashed upon the world.

TBC