Aftermath
An OTH Naley Short
By Alex B
2
Utterly amazing. That was what it was when Nathan looked at her. She had to sleep on her back because of her leg, but her hand always rested on his chest. He could feel the metal of her wedding ring warm on his skin. He was always going to want her. But after he told her what she deserved to know, would Haley still want him?
"Stop it." Her lips smiled. Leaning forward, Nathan kissed her cheek. "Come on, handsome," she teased. "You can do better than that."
"Oh, I know I can, and I will once you're better."
"You know," Haley spoke, her eyes still closed. "I think that I'm well enough to handle any kiss you want to throw at me."
"Humor me."
"Only because you're so cute."
He frowned at that. "Guys don't want to be cute."
She chuckled. "Okay, only because you're so crazy sexy I can't say no to you. Better?"
"Much…"
"Glad I could help." Closing his eyes, Nathan concentrated on Haley's fingertips moving slowly over his chest. "Baby you have to sleep," she told him. "You can't function on exhaust."
"I love you, Haley."
"I know."
"So much," Nathan went on earnestly. Her eyes came open and she pushed herself up on her elbows.
"Nathan, dammit," she breathed at the tears on his cheeks. "What, for Godsakes, what is it. Please. Tell me." He gathered her to him so tight Haley could barely breathe. She bounced her balled fist off his shoulder. The first of her hot tears splashed down her cheeks. "Nathan," she begged.
He held her face in his hands, brushed her tears away from her cheeks with his thumbs. When he kissed her, Nathan prayed that it wouldn't be for the last time. He knew that he should wait, but he just could not hold it in anymore.
"It's my fault," he told her finally. "All of it. You and our baby almost died and it's my fault."
"What?" Why was he saying this? When he rested his had on her shoulder again, Haley pushed him away. "This was an accident, Nathan." She told him. "This is not your fault."
"Haley,"
"No," she shook her head hard then took his face in her hands. "Listen to me, Nathan, hear me. This is not your fault. Do you understand?"
"I went do Dan." His shame was so great; his fear was so huge that Nathan's voice was barely a whisper. "I asked for help, but he wouldn't give it to me,"
"Dan didn't give you the money?"
Nathan shook his head. "No."
"Then who?" He bowed his head. "Who, Nathan?"
"A man came to the Rivercourt. He used to play for the Ravens. We talked. More than once. I don't know how he knew, but he knew that we were in trouble."
"Oh, Nathan, no…"
"He offered, Haley, and I took it." Nathan looked her in the eye now. "You needed me to make it better and it was the only way that I could. I took it, Haley. Sweet, I took that money."
"And you just thought that it was a gift?" Her voice was hard. He pushed himself out of their bed and paced the floor in front of it. He dragged his hand over the top of his head.
"No." He finally spoke. "I knew that he was going to want something. But I didn't know what."
"What did he want? Nathan!" She spoke louder when he didn't answer.
"Points." His voice went horse. "He wanted points. He wanted me to shave points in a game so that TH would only win by ten. Haley-" she held her head in her hands. Her chest heaved as she breathed hard to keep whatever it was growing inside her at bay.
"That car that hit me," she spoke. When she finally looked up, everything in Nathan sank. There was nothing there, not fear, not anger, not love. There wasn't revulsion or hate. "That car was meant for you?"
He nodded.
"Say it!"
"Yeah," he croaked. "It was meant for me. Haley-"
"Why?" She cut him off. "Why? You did what you said. You shaved those points, gambled with your future. Why did he still come?"
"Because he wanted more."
Her throat worked as she swallowed. "More? How much more, Nathan?"
"The championship."
Her breath whooshed out of her. "Lucas made that shot. Did he know? Did Lucas know that you were into a loan shark for your soul?"
"He knew."
"My God,"
"No, Haley, he didn't…Lucas was pissed. I only told him because I knew that it I didn't he would go out looking on his own. I didn't know what those guys were capable of."
"They're loan sharks, Nathan!" She shouted. "Not everything you read in books or see on TV is false. He had a heart attack,"
"Because he didn't take his pills. Not because I did this."
"You contributed, dammit." She shook her head hard as she tried to hold back her sobs. A whimper caught in her throat. He tried to hold her, but Haley pushed him away. "No, don't touch me. Don't you dare touch me," her hands cupped her stomach.
"Haley?"
"He could have died."
"I know." She started to cry and Nathan fought to be one the bed next to her. Haley fought to keep him away. She swung until her arms hurt. She swung until she had nothing left, and Nathan let her. He took every blow she threw. He took advantage of her tired body and held her, pressing kisses into her hair and on her face, telling her over and over again that he was sorry.
She threw her arms around his shoulders and hugged him back. She pushed her face into his neck. But when he started to kiss her again, Haley pushed him away. "No," she said. "No!"
"Haley, please,"
"No, Nathan. Go. Leave."
"I'm not leaving you."
"You don't have a choice. I can't be near you right now. Looking at you makes me sick."
"No, Haley…please don't say that."
"Our son could have died, Nathan then what? You tell me. Then what?!"
"I don't know. I don't know!"
"I cannot be near you right now. I can't look at you. You have to leave, Nathan. Now, or I'm getting out of this bed and walking myself!"
"Haley, you can't-"
"Can't what?" She dashed the tears away from her face. "Can't what Nathan?" She repeated.
"We need to be together, he told her. "We have to be together."
"Why?"
"Do you even have to ask?"
"Yeah, I do." She shoved her and into his chest. "Make it alright. Wake me up. Can yo do that, Nathan?"
It took him a moment to answer. "I'm trying to."
-
"Nate?" Peyton stepped out on the porch looking for Haley. "What happened?" He dropped his head then told her everything. He didn't leave anything out. Peyton was his friend, even when he did stupid things. She would help him. When he was finished he hated the look that was on her face. She was horrified.
"Peyton-" He didn't have a chance to say anything else. Peyton hit him so hard he stumbled and fell off the porch and into the yard. Nothing was broken, but he wished that something was. But even then, the pain in his body wouldn't be enough to battle the pain in his heart.
"Why did you come here?" She didn't tell him to kiss her ass, or take a hike. He took that as a good sign. Nathan reached into his pocket and threw his keys to her. "I need you to be with her." He spoke. "I don't want her to be alone."
"Where will you go?"
"Don't worry about it."
With his dad living in the Mayor's mansion and his mother back at the house, Nathan walked from Peyton's place to the house on the beach. He thanked the Gods for the liquor cabinet being stocked, and took a bottle of Jack and went out on the deck.
He'd asked for this. He couldn't take back what he did. But he wanted to. God, he wanted to. But what was done was done. He would take today, but tomorrow, he was going to get his family back.
He was breathing, so his heart had to be beating right? But Nathan couldn't feel it. Even if he were drunk, he wouldn't be able to blame that absence on the alcohol.
"Haley! Haley!"
It was like he was running in slow motion to get to her. The impact of the car threw her body into the air. It fell to the street, and when he finally got to her, she was gone. Her head was turned away from him, her eyes saw nothing.
He jerked so hard out of sleep that he nearly felled the chair that he passed out in. Bottle in his hands, Nathan dragged himself off the patio and down the dock to the water. He threw the bottle into the ocean. Staggering back to the house, he sat in the dark.
-
"You went to see Lucas?"
Peyton nodded. "Apparently Nathan went to see him today, too. He was so mad when I saw him. Now I know why. They won't let him out until the day after tomorrow. He'll go to Nathan." Haley looked over at her. Peyton was lying in bed next to her. Her cast had been tagged by Sawyer.
"Did you hurt him?"
"Probably."
"I can't believe you punched him."
She didn't look up from her drawing. "Didn't you?"
"I did worse." She had done so much worse. Haley hiccupped as the tears started again. "We could have figured something out. He didn't have to do this."
"Haley," Peyton spoke softly. "You're gonna make yourself sick."
"I couldn't feel him." She whispered. "After I woke up, I couldn't feel my baby."
"Oh, Haley..."
"I just knew that he was gone," she went on. "And when I heard his heart beat…when we heard…it was like a sign to me that everything was going to be alright. Now this."
"You know that Nathan would die before he let anything happen to you." Peyton said. "He made a boneheaded jack-assed move, and while I don't feel sorry for clocking his behind, you know that he would move heaven and Earth for you and that heartbeat."
"I know."
"Good." She nodded succinctly. "What's going to happen now?"
"I don't know." Haley shook her head. "I can't even look at Nathan right now. I can't be around him. He's my husband, Peyton and I'll love him forever. He was trying to make things right for us. Why do I feel like this? Why am I feeling so betrayed?"
"I can't answer that for you, Hales?" When her cell rang, Peyton frowned at her caller ID.
"Yeah,"
"How is she?"
She glanced back at Haley. "Baring the elements," Peyton replied. "Where are you?"
"Beach house."
"Hopefully not doing anything stupid."
"I've learned my lesson."
"Good, I should hope so. Hold on." She handed the phone back to Haley. She took it and waited until Peyton left the room, closing the door softly behind her. She started to speak, but Peyton stuck her head back in the room. "No phone sex. I still have to pay the bill." Snatching a pillow from behind her, she lobbed at the door. Peyton shut it before impact. Haley could hear the girl laughing down the hallway.
"I love you, Nathan."
"Do you mean that?" His voice asked roughly, because after earlier, he wasn't so sure.
He had been pacing he deck all day practicing what he was going to say. He was still pacing it now. He had raked a hand through his hair so much his scalp was starting to feel sore.
"You know that I do."
"God, Haley, I love you, too. I'm sorry. I didn't mean for any of this to happen. You have got believe that.
"I do."
"I love our baby."
"I know." She heard his breath ease out over the line. She could also hear the surf in the background. Closing her eyes she could see him. Standing on the porch of their family's beach house as the wind coming in off the ocean messed with dark hair on his head that was in need of a cut.
"What now, he asked her?"
"Time,"
His voice sighed over the line. She knew that he wasn't going to like what she said when he asked the question. "How much, and will you still be mad at when you finally let me come home?"
"I don't know Nathan," she sighed, unconsciously rubbing her hand low on her belly. Their kid had radar. He knew something was wrong and wanted to know what problem was.
"Somebody tried to kill you." She waited for him to say something, but Nathan kept quiet. "I don't want to be mad at you, Nathan. I told you that I needed you to fix our problem. But never did I expect what you did to be your way of doing it."
"What more do you want me to say? What do I need to do?"
"I've already told you."