Disclaimer: All the characters/ places in this story belong to Stephanie Meyer.
Chapter 1: One step back
Bella's POV
4 months ago
Coughing, I flicked my dying cigarette into the toilet and staggered to my feet. Shoot, that was my last fag, I thought, asI washed my face groggily. I chose a grey woolly top and wound it comfortably round my waist. I sighed the moment I caught my reflection in the mirror. My face was still scarlet from the crying. Never-the-less I got into my truck and rode through the never ending rain full that was Forks, Washington.
By the time I got to school, the bell had just gone. My first three lessons were all the same, draining lectures ,tests and case studies; and the same pitying eyes of my friends, which really didn't help me calm down from the fight Charlie and I had had this morning. I know I shouldn't have thrown a fit like that, but there was no way I was going to Jacksonville, not when Edward might still come back.
"Bella?" Angela's cautious voice startled me out of my daydream.
"Oh, sorry. I was miles away." I whispered.
"I can see that" Jessica giggled.
"So…" Angela muttered indecisively, before Jess butted in again.
"We were thinking of going up to Port Angles before autumn break, to get some deals. Do you wanna tag along?" Could her smile be any faker? This was great. Now Jessica would throw another hissy fit if I didn't go. I obviously, did not need that kind of drama. At least Angela could tell I had enough on my plate already. I chuckled silently to myself. That didn't even cover it. I'd been left broken by the love of my life, had started un-winningly fighting with Charlie almost daily and was spending eighty percent of my money on cigarettes, which I barely had time to smoke with my midterms coming ever closer.
Eventually, the girls dropped the subject and began to talk mercilessly about some party that Mike was meant to be hosting. So, I went to get a pizza from the food counter. As I got in line, some of the junior boys whistled loudly: "Put on a bit of weight there Bella?" I probably would have ignored him had his friend not opened his mouth. "I think that might be why Cullen left her" He stage whispered, just loud enough to hear. I all but threw the pizza back. Maybe I'd skip lunch today. And tomorrow…
I sat down again. Then, Lauren said something to Eric that not only made my heart stop, but also made it come up into my throat, cut itself into pieces and send itself to Phoenix and back without ever leaving my ribcage:
"Apparently, the Cullens are coming back after the fall term…"
I ran.
I couldn't take it. All these emotions. How could he come back? Part of me wanted to slice him into a million pieces, burn them and dance round the blistering, hot flames for what he did to me. The other part felt a ridicules serge of bliss at the very mention of his name. That was the part that sent an endless cascade of butterflies delicately stabbing at my stomach every time I remembered his perfect marble face.
I ran blindly through the empty hallways. The internal battle threatened to maul me inside out, like an angry grizzly.
I soon found myself in a girls toilet, so I drunkenly hobbled into the first stall. It still smelled of detergent from the midday cleaners and an uncapped bleach bottle degraded itself next to me. I barley noticed, I was hugging my own torso so hard I feared it would snap. I loved him. I truly loved him. I loved him more than anyone could physically love another person. But he didn't want me. He said so himself. A howl of pain escaped my dry lips. I couldn't live like this. And I didn't have to. With that thought in my head it was unbearable to resist. I bent over my tear-drenched clothes and picked the delicious looking bleach bottle, with full intentions to drink it and end my life here and now. And that's when I first heard him…
"Isabella?" It was a male voice. Incredible. Beautiful. Irresistible...
"Bella!" Came my gruff reply. Who didn't know my name by now? Wait…male voice. "Get the hell out of here! What are you? A perv or something?!" An odd running sound rose up from the floor. The bleach! I must have dropped it when he spoke! I thought, unable to help the fact that it was running slowly toward the stall door.
"Bella…I'm new here. I saw you run out the lunch hall. I was surprised your friends didn't come" He said my name as though it was the most heavenly sound he knew. And yet I didn't answer .I let the bleach- now at the door- answer for me. His reply was rushed. He understood perfectly.
"Bella. Please open the door, before you do anything…rash" This I did. And there he stood. He was tall and very muscular. He reminded me slightly of the werewolves of La Push. His half-cast skin really complemented his chocolate brown hair, witch was pulled back into a short pony-tale. Through my tears, I could have sworn his deep brown eyes were the purest black. And then he was gone. Like a dream. Like my own guardian angel…
Hey guys,
Sooooo… slightly happier this time, but still no Jasper…
I'll change that if you review:D
See you soon!
JAZZLES DAZZLES!