I was just peacefully sleeping on my bed when I received another wake up call from Richelieu. She kicked the door open and yelled loud enough for me to be snap awake.
"Reveille, ma amiral!" She looks so proud while saying that
"Uaaaaah!"
I almost got tangled in my bed sheets and she almost gave me a sudden heart attack.
"You have to stop doing that!"
No matter what I do, Richelieu always finds a way to barge to my room with no care in the world.
"As the secretary, it's my duty to discipline the admiral"
(She calls giving me a heart attack once in a while discipline?!)
"Now then, admiral! It's time to get ready for the day!"
It's not even sunrise and she already looks so energetic while I still want to go back to bed and sleep for ten minutes or so.
"Uuuuggh. Fine. Whatever..."
I first went to the bath and took a hot shower. I still feel a bit sleepy and so my body is sluggish. My eyes still feels heavy and my body feels so exhausted...
"Still...sleepy..."
I lazily wore my pleated skirt. I can't even slip on my undershirt and when I am about to close my eyes from the sleepiness...
"Admiral, what's taking you...so...long..."
Richelieu caught me while I'm still getting dressed up. I immediately slipped on my shirt.
"Admiral..."
"You know you should have knocked first"
"...Right.
Why does Richelieu suddenly looks like she's in deep thought? Sometimes I just don't understand what she's thinking.
Later...
Today it seems I have less paperwork to do and more on sortieing to the Northern waters. While I think about on who should I send to patrol there, Richelieu brought me the coffee I requested.
"Danke" I smiled at the coffee's warmth
Suddenly...I feel like Richelieu is focusing her attention on me and I don't know why. I feel so awkward right now...
"Ma amiral"
"Hmm?" I was just about to take a small sip
"Those deep scars. Where did you get them?"
I froze for a moment before slowly putting back the cup of coffee on top of the saucer. My heart raced when Richelieu asked me that of all things.
"You...saw them?"
"Yes. Earlier this morning"
So that's why she looked so conflicted earlier this morning. What am I supposed to tell her?
"Admiral, Those kind of scars...what caused them?"
"The Abyssals gave me these scars"
"A...Abyssals?"
"It's a long story"
My scars dated back to my old days when I was still at my prime. I sounded like an old lady just thinking about that. My body is not as strong as it used to be...it
I can't fight anymore.
Afternoon...
Sometimes when I'm on break, I would spend my time just sitting in a comfortable position. I took of my coat and lied down on the sofa.
"It's nice to experience peace like this...without a worry in the world..."
I closed my eyes and refreshed my memory. It was a long time ago when I could see nothing but smoke and fire and feeling the heat on my skin. I have to admit I felt afraid that day.
The fear of helplessness...
My body could no longer move. Everything was fading away...I was alone...I was alone.
Nee...san...
I was alone for so long in that cold place. There was no one there. I don't want to be left alone.
"That dream again...on those cold waters..."
It's vague, but I could remember the memory when I woke up. It was a few years ago, some time before I enlisted into the Navy.
I feel so cold...so...cold...and alone...
"A civilian?! Captain, I spotted a civilian!"
I remembered slowly waking up when I heard someone shouting in a distance. My body felt so weak and I could barely move. My body drenched in water made me feel so cold.
"Hey, miss...are you okay?" The man worryingly ran towards me
Using the little strength I have, I lifted my head and took a good look at the man's face.
I don't want you to feel alone...because you're someone I cared about. You're my friend.
Ah! Why did that memory suddenly slipped into my flashback. Remembering her smile made me feel...both pain and joy.
"I don't like remembering...the smile of a dead person..."
Grabbing my coat, I shrugged off that thought and resumed my duty before Richelieu scolds me for slacking off.
The next day...
I had just finished checking on the developments of the newly constructed equipments when I happened to see Yamato practicing.
"All port side guns adjust fifteen degrees. Fire!"
The sound when her main guns open fire sure is loud...but in a good way.
"Mmm...46 cm guns. Must be nice to equip them"
If I remember correctly, one gun mount is heavier than a Yuugumo class destroyer. I'll break my back of I carried three of those.
"How unfortunate of me. I want to try those huge guns"
I continued to watch Yamato practice on the training grounds. Well she had just received adjustments to her main guns so she must be field testing them first.
"A classic Japanese beauty combined with those huge assets is a wonderful thing to see"
Before I could be lost in my daydreaming, I realized I have more work to do and I don't want my secretary ship scold me That's On the way to my office, I passed over the open grounds and saw the destroyers gathering.
"Teste?"
Oddly I saw Teste there as well, but she look like she doesn't know what to do. I wonder why she's worried and panicking. As I walked over to the commotion, Teste noticed me approaching.
"Admiral!" She ran to me crying
"Commandant Teste?"
"I'm so glad you're here. I don't know what to do" She cried while hugging me
"What's going on?"
She looked at the center of the commotion and there...I'm not even surprised at what's going on.
"What's you're problem?!"
"You're the problem!"
Nowaki and Shiranui are on it again. By on it again, I mean they're violently tackling each on the ground other like two angry children.
"If you had just listened...!" Nowaki is currently wrestling Shiranui
"That mistake was yours"
If this continues, they'll seriously hurt each other and it's going to be a bit of a problem so I decided to intervene.
"Hey, hey hey! Cut it out you two!"
I angrily went to the commotion and separated the two from further beating each other up.
"Just what's going on here?"
Last time they fought like this was a few days ago. I thought they learned their lesson, but it seems they don't just get along.
"She started it" Shiranui wiped the side of her mouth
"Now it's my fault?!"
Before the two could start punching and breaking each others' ribs, I went in between.
"Why are you two fighting this time?"
"Shiranui just won't listen. One enemy escaped as a result on the last sortie"
"There's no way I'm going listen to you" Shiranui's stubborn attitude isn't helping
"Why you...!"
All I can do now is avoid these two being in the same fleet or even a simple sortie might fail...and cause inconvenience.
"It's because of your stubbornness we kept failing"
"How is it my fault when you always act as you please?" Shiranui retaliated
Whatever am I going to do with these two? I wish they would just set their personal feelings aside and focus on their duties as ship girls.
"That's enough. You two aren't going to sortie until the two of you learn to get along with each other"
"What?!"
"No complaints! That's a direct order"
"..."
"Use that time to rethink things through"
I had to be assertive and show a degree of discipline to these girls. I don't want to be too strict or too loose to them.
"Sorry you had to deal with the situation, admiral"
While I sat in the office, Commandant Teste prepared some freshly made tea.
"It's fine. I had it worse...in the past"
I've dealt with 'troublesome children' before and they bicker much worse than destroyers.
"Admiral?"
"Ah. I was just remembering the time I spent in England"
"Eeeh?! Admiral has been to England"
She's sparkling again. It's like whenever she sees or hear something that interests her, she gets excited like a child.
"I'm only there because of an acquaintance"
"Acquaintance?"
"She's a noble lady who knows a lot of things. A lot of things"
Whenever I think of her, it gives me mix feelings. It's like a mixture of bitterness and nostalgia.
Later that night...
After taking a half bath, I changed into my sleeping clothes and laid down on the bed. The only thing annoying that happened this day was Shiranui and Nowaki beating the bloody pulp out of each other.
"Guten nacht..." I muttered to myself
Closing my eyes, I immediately fell into a deep slumber. I drifted within my own mind, wandering aimlessly.
It's so dark in here...
It feels so cold...in here...
I don't want...to be left here...
Don't...leave me alone...
I heard someone pleading with great pain. The cries echoed everywhere while I am surrounded by nothing but crimson.
I...want to go back...
A white figure stood there. Her skin is completely white and her eyes are brightly glowing. She looked at me with an emotionless face, but I sensed the hatred inside her.
I...don't want...to be left here...
I can hear her voice, but I don't see her speaking. When she starts walking towards me, my body instinctively walked back.
They left me here...
To sink at the bottom...
Alone...in these waters
Right before I knew it, her hand pierced right through my body.
"...?!" No voice came out of me
The mysterious white figure with glowing eyes, pulled out her hand and coldly looked down on me as I fall on the ground...bleeding.
Nee...san...
Before I could be fully consumed by darkness, I heard her speak that in a lonely yet scared manner.
"...?!" I ended up waking up
I gasped for air and felt my heart raced. I touched my abdomen and saw no blood or hole in there.
"What the heck was that dream about?"
That dream scared me. I have to admit that. Now because of that, I can't sleep.
"Great. Now I can't sleep"
I complained since I don't feel sleepy after waking up from that horrible nightmare.
"Great..."
Hours passed and I failed to fall back to sleep. By then, I realized it's morning, but I have work to do...so I might as well get ready.
"I'm going to have drink black coffee because of this"
Yawning, I went to the shower and because I wasn't paying attention, I turned it on the wrong side.
"Aaaaah!"
Really cold water washed all over my body...sending an unusual sensation all over my body.
"Richelieu is going to be mad...aaah"
I won't be able to do my job properly and my secretary will probably scold me for sleeping on the job.
"Bonjour, ma amiral"
With hot coffee placed on my desk, Richelieu greeted me.
"Ma amiral?" She waved her hand in front of my face
"Ah! Yeah, sure sure. What?"
"Admiral, you're out of focus today"
She narrowed her eyes as she leaned her face closer to me.
"You look awfully tired"
"I'm fine, Richelieu"
"Ma amiral, did you even sleep last night?"
"...Yeah"
I looked away when I answered her, but she doesn't sound so convinced.
"Good grief. If you don't have enough sleep, your body will weaken"
"What?"
"You should take care of yourself. You're making me worry"
After putting some sugar in my coffee and stirred it well, she pushed it closer to me.
"Aaaaw you're worried about me" I teased her
"If you die from overexerting yourself, it's won't be easy getting a replacement with the lack of admirals"
She suddenly changed to a harsher tone. This is probably because she doesn't like showing her softer side to me. Well it's true it's not easy to get an admiral nowadays with the lack of manpower.
"I can handle the work just fine because I have a very reliable secretary"
"...!"
"Richelieu, you've been a great help to me ever since I came here. Thank you"
I can see her blushing, but she turned away after I said those words. Ha ha ha. Don't tell me she doesn't like me seeing her getting flustered.
"It's my duty as your secretary ship after all...and I have work hard as the flagship of the main fleet"
Sometimes I wonder if she's some sort of tsundere or she's not used getting compliments.
Lunch...
Today, Commandant Teste is making lunch. Sometimes I get my own food, but there are certain ship girls who likes to cook.
"This is..." I looked at the plate in front of me
"It's Chicken Basquaise"
"Chicken...Basquaise?"
"Oui. It's a combination of chicken, onions, pepper, and olives. Sometimes I put paprika in there"
"This looks delicious"
To test it, I took a single bite and I already tasted the spices she put in the food, namely the pepper.
(Oooh. So this is the first time I tasted something like this)
I like how I can really taste the chicken in a new way even with the simple appearance. She looks like she's enjoying her meal too.
"You got a little something on your mouth"
Seeing the stain on the side of her mouth, I took a napkin and gently wiped it off.
"...!" Why is she blushing?
"There"
"M-merci" Now she looked away
Lately, I observed Teste and Richelieu acts all shy when they feel flustered or something. What's up with that?
"I really love your cooking. I want to taste your cooking again"
"I'm glad ma amiral loves my cooking"
Whenever she smiles, she smiles so innocently and purely. It's like she's some sort of angel.
"..."
"Admiral, what's wrong?"
Even with her smile full of happiness, I can senses something deeper. It's like she's hiding some sort of pain.
"Nothing. It's nothing"
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah..."
After lunch, I head to the beach to think about certain things. The peace and the sound of the calm waves helps me relax so I like sitting here and doing nothing.
"Admiral?"
Surprisingly, I saw Yamato heading towards my direction.
"You look like you're in a deep thought"
"I'm just thinking about my past"
"Your past?"
"Yeah. I can't stop thinking about my sister"
There's no days that passes that I don't think of her. What can I say...it's hard to try forgetting the only family I have left.
"After our parents died, my sister worked hard so the two of us can survive"
"It sounds like you're proud of her"
"Very. She faced everything with no fear. I envy her because she's such a strong person"
I could never forget that smile of hers as she faced the sun with so much confidence. She feared nothing...not even the Abyssals.
"I'm glad to have an older sister like her"
"Do you...want to see her again?"
"I do, but I mustn't. It's kind of a long story"
Whenever I get emotional, I tend to talk about my past. I can't let anyone know who I really am. Not yet...not until this war ends...
"Nee-san..." I looked at a picture of when we were younger
After the day ended, I returned to my room emotionally exhausted. I haven't slept last night so I really feel tired.
"I hope one day you'll understand...I can't go back...to the way I used to be..."
Before I closed my eyes, I thought of the last time I saw her before that unforgettable day came.
I wish I could have said goodbye...