Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.
A/N: Trailer on Youtube: Battle for Yoruichi
History Repeats
Youichi: I can't believe this happening again. This hasn't happened since Shunsui Kyōraku & Jūshirō Ukitake released A Gentlemen's Guide to Girls and Great Hair
Yoruichi reminisces about that day. A Gentlemen's Guide to Girls and Great Hair was named the book of the year by the Shinigami Men's Association the day Yoruichi and the others were to head back to the human world. It all started with Shūhei.
Yoruichi x Shuhei, Komamura, Hanatarō, Kenpachi, Ikkaku, Yumichika ;-P, Kira, Kon
Shūhei: So how you doin'?
Yoruichi: I am fine. How…
Shūhei: Oh can see that
Yoruichi: What?
Shūhei: Do you believe love at first sight or do I have to walk up to you again?
Komamura: Excuse me Shūhei, I think Captain Yamamoto wants to speak with you.
Shuhei: Sorry I have to leave.
Komamura: I must apologize for young Shuhei.
Yoruichi: Its no big deal.
Komamura: That is good to hear. Yoruichi I have a question for you.
Yoruichi: What is it?
Komamura: If I followed you home would you keep me?
Yoruichi: I am kinda in between worlds right now. Look at the time I have to train with Soi Fon. Bye (she flash steps away).
Hanatarō: (just standing there)
Yoruichi: Hi, Hanatarō
Hanatarō: (just standing there)
Yoruichi: (two minutes pass) Bye
Hanatarō: (five minutes later he is still standing there)
Yamamoto: (walks up and taps Hanatarō on the shoulder)
Hanatarō: (turns quickly and yells) Wow, you're pretty.
Yoruichi encounters another captain on way from training with Soi Fon.
Kenpachi: Hi Yoruichi, can I have directions?
Yoruichi: To where?
Kenpachi: To your heart (Yoruichi flash steps away heading east)
Kenpachi: Where'd she go?
Yachiru: That way (points to the west)
Yoruichi watches Kenpachi and Yoruichi from the one place he's sure not look the roof of the 11th Division's headquarters. Unfortunately, they've started to heading for the headquarters.
Kenpachi: Which way now?
Yachiru: Yoruichi is cat and cats like fish, hmm that way to Bya-kun's pond. (Kenpachi stops and heads in the opposite direction of the 11th's headquarters)
Yoruichi jumps down and runs into Ikkaku and Yumichika
Ikkaku: You must know karate? Because your body is really kickin'.
Yumichika: That was so not beautiful.
Ikkaku: What? And you can do better
Yumichika: Of course, (turns to Yoruichi) you're almost as beautiful as me. You're so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.
Ikkaku: Haha
Yumichika: Stop laughing!
Ikkaku &Yumichika: (They turn to face her) YORUICHI!! (she's gone)
Yoruichi: Hi Kira
Kira: If I (holds head down, and mumbles softly) bit my lip would you kiss it better?
Yoruichi: (lefts his head up gently) What? (Kira faints)
The next day after returning to the human world Ichigo and Kon stop by the shop and Kon sees Yoruichi in her human form for the first time.
Kon: (flying through the air towards Yoruichi) If I told you, you have a nice body. Would you (Yoruichi kicks him) rub it against mine (flying away from Yoruichi)?
Back to the Present
Yoruichi begins to smile after going over the previous events.
Aizen: I knew you'd be happy to seem.
Yoruichi: Aizen (Her smile disappears).
Yammy: (enters the room where Aizen is with Yoruchi) Aizen-sama there is trouble in Karakura.
Aizen: You don't say. Yoruichi we'll have to finish this conversation later. Later I'll have to show you my zanpakuto, its very very niicce. Yammy take care of our guest (Aizen leaves).
Yammy: Well I knew you couldn't stay away from me. You know once you go Yammy, everything else is just…just, hmm, hammy.
Ulquiorra senses Aizen. Ichigo charges, but Ulquiorra has already left to find Aizen
Ichicgo: DAMN IT, where'd he go?
Yoruichi: You're kidding right?
Yammy: (reminisces about their last encounter) You can fall out the sky, you can fall out a tree, but baby, the best way to fall is in love with me.
(Ulquiorra watched the entire exchange. He walks over and hits Yammy in the stomach sending him flying backwards.)
Yammy: What are doing?
Ulquiorra: I told you before; you're in over your head. She's mine.
Ulquiorra: It looks like Christmas has come early this year. I can't wait to unwrap my gift (he reaches for Yoruichi).
Yammy: Ulquiorrrra (Yammy attempts to pound Ulquiorra, but Ulquiorra stops his blow with one finger). I am tired of you getting in my way. Not every woman wants you. (Yammy presses down harder causing Ulquiorra to use his entire hand to stop the force)
Ulquiorra: Don't be a fool.
Ulquiorra removes his hand from his pocket and punches Yammy in the stomach sending him backwards. Yammy regains his balance and tries to hit Ulquiorra with a Cero blast. Ulquiorra deflects it easily sending it through the wall and into the room where Halibel and Sofion are still fighting.
Ichigo: Why do you keep running? Why don't you fight me you cowardly... mime!?
Ulquiorra: Yammy for the third and final time she's mine (he leaves to fight Ichigo).
Yammy: Yoruichi right now you're just a 9.9 but you'd be a perfect 10 if you were with me.
Byakuya: Scatter
A/N I know History Repeats is an incredibly lame title for a chapter.