Author's note: This is the second and final part of the story. Originally it was supposed to be a one-shot, but I had further things to write for it. So, here we are. Haha.
Disclaimer: I do not own Diablo 3 or any of its characters. They all belong to Blizzard. The name "Valla" came from a short story written by Diablo 3 Publishing Lead, Micky Neilson, and posted on the official Diablo 3 website.
Even a Demon Hunter Can Be Smitten
The desert morning of Caldeum swept up from the horizon with warm sand carried in the breeze. The Iron Wolves had already left to get ready for their early training; Kormac, the templar, awoke not long after. He knew that Valla announced an early meeting at the entrance gates, so he took his sheathed dagger and jabbed at Lyndon's shoulder – a 'friendly' attempt to wake him. But Lyndon curled even more in his bed sheets, so he gave up being nice and walked to the bath house.
Not before long, the scoundrel himself awoke, refreshed from dandy dreams since his reconciliation with the huntress. He stretched his arms into the air and let out a long yawn before climbing out of bed and heading to the bath house – which, to his chagrin, was entirely full. He whined quietly and walked off to wait.
Along the sandy paths, he wandered and muttered aimlessly, not fully awake. He indeed thought he was still dreaming, because he stopped in his tracks in awe from the sight in front of him.
Valla stood on a stray boulder. That day, she wore a cowl dyed in cardinal red with the decorative scarf hanging from the back, swaying in the wind. Her white blouse was covered with a copper-tainted corset which hugged her thin waist. The only armour plates visible were on her shoulders, left arm and thighs; glistening in matching copper. And her crimson boots began to cover in sand as gold as the embroidery on the hems. On her gloved hand perched her pet raven, which she caressed lovingly as she peered at it with her moonlit eyes. Regardless of the lack in armour in comparison to her other sets, Haedrig's blacksmith skills enchanted this one with impenetrable fabric – impenetrable like her heart it seemed. But it easily became one of the scoundrel's favorites.
Lyndon suddenly grasped his shirt, where his heart was, and bent over with a quiet "oof!" The sight of the huntress had struck him straight in the heartstrings; unlike the usual sight of women which normally struck him only in the loins. Valla was a force to be reckoned with; a breathtaking…force.
"Good morning, Lyndon," She greeted monotonously, attention still fixated on her pet.
"Uhh…" His mind congested for a few seconds until he mentally slapped himself to answer, "Good morning, love!" He saluted excitedly with a chivalrous bow.
The demon hunter's raven cawed in response to his loud voice, to which Valla hushed him with a gentle stroke of her finger. Lyndon approached her.
"You're surprisingly early and ready today," She said as she eyed him curiously.
He sighed irritably. "I'm not, actually. The bath house is full, so I came out for a bit of a walk in waiting." His lips then curved upwards smugly. "Glad I did too, or I wouldn't have been graced by your…" he traced his eyes slowly up and down her body. "…enticing presence."
Valla gave him a flat look, to which the scoundrel responded with a hearty chuckle.
"Did you dress like this for me today, love?"
"My other clothes and armour are in repair and being cleaned." She replied simply, then grimaced. "And stop the endearing nicknames."
"Why?" He asked huskily, leaning closer to the huntress' face, to which she inched backwards. "Can't help a pleasant shiver up your delicate spine every time I call you…'love'?"
"CAW!"
Lyndon jumped back in surprise with a high-pitched yelp in the falsetto register. Valla's raven had crowed protectively, violently flapping its wings while still perched on the huntress' glove.
"Bloody bird!" Lyndon massaged his chest to calm his beating heart.
Valla had to turn away for a few seconds to stifle an amused laugh. It had been a long, long time since the last time she felt the urge to laugh out loud. When she finished meditating her chuckles away, she turned her head back to face the raven with her usual stoic expression. "Good pet, keep hunting evil like that," She caressed the raven's chest with the back of her fingers, successfully calming it to stillness.
Lyndon pouted playfully. "How rude! I'm not hellspawn!"
"Apologies, my companion could not tell the difference." She smirked a little at her own snarky retort.
"Hmph. Stupid bird should have been acquainted with my charming face by now."
This time, Valla cleared her throat to mask yet another set of chuckles. What. Is. Happening? She cursed mentally. Her years of meditation practice were failing her. Maybe it was the lightened atmosphere of the world since the Lord of Terror had fallen. Or maybe Lyndon's jesting was somehow getting more amusing. She liked to believe the former; but her discipline training kicked in when she reminded herself that there was evil yet to be purged.
"Does this lump of feathers have a name, already?"
Lyndon's question snapped her out of her thoughts. She watched as he kept poking his finger at the raven's beak, to which the bird tried biting but missed repeatedly.
"I did not name him," She replied.
"Oh, well, as barbaric as this little fellow is, I think he deserves a name rather than being addressed as 'stupid bird' or bloody bird', don't you think?"
"Only you call him those," Valla stated in a matter-of-fact tone.
"Of which he will have the honour of accepting such titles from me," He proudly said, receiving a roll of the eyes from the huntress. "But I say a proper name is in order!"
The demon hunter gazed at him for a moment. She supposed she could humour him a little before scolding him to go get ready. "I could name him 'Lyndon'." She suggested mischievously, hoping to demean the scoundrel.
"Oh, naughty," He purred seductively. "You name him after me because every time you see him, you think of my little bir-"
Valla slapped the scoundrel's wide forehead with the back of her hand.
"Ow…!" He whined.
She pushed a large breath of air out of her nostrils to cool her heated face. "I could name him after you," she corrected him calmly, "Because you crow exactly like him."
"Oh, can't get enough of my voice, love?"
Valla scowled in defeat. "You really do have something to say to everything, do you?"
"Relentlessly! Like my pursuit of you." He winked. "Speaking of which, what I proclaimed last night, it is the truth. And I would not steal from you and flee when you fall equally as madly in love with me, because there's much more treasure to be had with you." He took her hand in his and planted a chivalrous kiss on the back, his voice sincere. "And I mean, much more."
At that, she jerked her hand away and gave him a stern look. "And even if you did accomplish all that and have fled, you wouldn't get too far." She said as she haughtily tilted her head and raised a brow. "Nor would you have retained all your limbs to be able to travel in the first place."
She expected a terrified gulp from the man, but instead, Lyndon flashed her a radiant smile. His larger, calloused hands gently took hold of both her gloved ones; the raven flew off and circled above them. Lyndon reassured her again with a confident, husky voice full of sincerity.
"I bet all my spoils that I will lose none of my limbs, pilfer nothing from you other than your heart and flee from all kinds of danger except for the danger that is you, love."
Valla bit the inside of her cheek as a feeling of a thousand feathers swiveled in her chest. Lyndon gazed straight into her glowing eyes, successfully locking her pupils in place. When she did not make any move to refuse, he slowly bent towards her lips. Valla shifted her heel backwards, lips trembling in rhythm with her heartbeat. No, she was supposed to have a greater immunity than this.
"Kormac, at your service!"
The huntress caught sight of the templar in the distance and immediately rammed the point of her boot into Lyndon's shin. The scoundrel groaned loudly as he bent over to massage his leg. Valla turned away from him, taking several quiet breaths under the shade of her hood.
"Discipline, discipline, balance, remember your training. Meditate," She mumbled under her breath to recompose herself.
"I am ready for today's dispatching!" Kormac saluted.
"So am I! The deserts will be freed of demons soon!" Eirena tagged behind him excitedly.
"So where to today, hero? Alcarnus? The Desolate Sands? The sewers?" Kormac emphasized each location with a flick of his dagger.
"Capital timing, templar," Lyndon grumbled irritably.
"Indeed," Valla muttered inaudibly, then cleared her throat. "It seems there is more space in the bath house, Lyndon. Hurry on to get ready. If you're not back by the time I finish explanations, we will all leave."
The scoundrel gave her a brief pout (which she ignored) before straightening up with a sigh and limping to the bathhouse.
"I will make haste! Speak slowly!" He called out in the distance.
"Ugh," Valla groaned as she put a hand on her hip and massaged her temple with the other.
Eirena bent her head to the side, resting it on her grounded rod as she squinted curiously at the huntress.
"That's a very peculiar shade of red," She commented in wonder.
Valla pulled at her crimson hood. "Haedrig chose the colour for this armour set."
"No," Eirena chuckled, "I meant your face."
Valla stared at her briefly, then darted her eyes everywhere. When the enchantress giggled, the huntress turned away silently, pulling her hood even lower over her face. Kormac only scratched the back of his head in confusion.
Again, the demon hunter found herself hoofing across the desserts. And again, the scoundrel insisted on following her. The pair swept the caves clean, ensuring no remaining hellspawn or egg. It did not take long for them to clear each area; not without the dexterous crossbows that each fired. It was only a matter of time that they crossed off the remaining destinations on their map.
"This should be the last of the unexplored caves," Valla stated as she folded away her map to reveal a large cave opening.
They were in the middle of the Desolate Sands; the sun radiated its heat across the desert and the winds picked up swirls of sand into the air. The huntress would have been lying if she said she was not sweating. The enchanted cowl kept her body temperature normal, but it was still not enough to resist the desert heat completely. Her brows furrowed as she heard a long, hoarse groan behind her.
"Alright, let us go in and get some shade at least," Lyndon whined, fanning himself with one hand. "I'm this close to stripping all my clothes off."
"Then let us hurry into the cave." The huntress walked into the shaded cavern.
"Not interested in seeing the goods I've got packed, love?" Lyndon chuckled.
"No, thank you." Valla smirked when she thought of a good retort. "I've seen enough of the Burning Hells to ruin my eyesight."
"How rude!" The scoundrel pouted, to which Valla celebrated inwardly at his defeated lack of words.
The cave was surprisingly empty. Nothing crawled about as the pair trekked the twisting and turning corridors, save for a few scorpions (Lyndon stepped on them anyway). They continued onwards with their crossbows unlocked. Regardless of the silence, their guard was up two-fold – they know from first-hand experience how things would just jump out of nowhere.
At one point, however, Lyndon began to grow weary and lowered his crossbow to a lazy stance.
"Must we search every crevice?" He groaned. "I think whatever was left of the demons would have starved to death."
"Have you seen the egg sacks?" Valla stopped in her tracks, pointing to a bundle of demon eggs stuck onto the wall. She shot a hungering bolt that weaved through and obliterated them all. Following the crackling sounds of the egg shells, Valla turned around to give the scoundrel a stern look. "Even the unborn cannot be forgiven," she hissed.
Lyndon coiled back a little. "Okay…" He spoke rather timidly, but followed closely when the huntress began jogging again. "You terrify me sometimes."
"Good." Valla stated flatly.
"But often, you enchant me, love."
"Shut up, Lyndon."
"Oh come off it, I-"
"Shh!" Valla stopped in her tracks, holding out an arm to stop Lyndon from running. "I am serious," she lowered her voice to a whisper.
Indeed, there was something in the air. The ambient sounds suddenly came to an abnormal still that only grew tension in the pair's every muscle. It did not help that they were in an intersection chamber where several corridor openings surrounded the walls. In a moment, scurrying and buzzing sounds came closer and closer. The huntress and scoundrel glued their backs to one another, readying their firearms.
Valla closed her eyes. Amongst the ricocheting vibrations of sounds, her trained ears detected the unique movements of whatever approached.
"Spiders," She muttered calmly. "Deadly Swarms, Desert Stings…" Her glowing eyes shot open with bloodlust as she hissed, "Legion."
Lyndon pressed his back even more into the huntress'. A sheepish laugh escaped him. "It's not too late to open a town portal."
Valla sneered. "And risk losing some valuable spoils?"
The scoundrel instantly straightened himself and loaded his crossbow. "I absolutely despise you sometimes, love!"
In a matter of seconds, legion Dessert Stings rounded the corners with their unique glows. They released rows of their young; some of them splattering against the wall and releasing poisonous fumes; others gradually flying towards the pair.
"That's quite an enemy over there; we are in for a fight!"
"Must you say that every time we encounter these?"
"Then…how about 'Look at that thing over there! Let's ki-OW!"
Valla stomped her heel into Lyndon's shin; the scoundrel bended over instantly with a pained growl. She took aim above him and shot a bolt through a row of bugs into a skewer. Before the swarms could advance on them, she fired a volley of arrows at them; with her thumb and forefinger hooped between her lips, she whistled a call that summoned her raven. Lyndon massaged his foot while shooting at the demons that the raven had held in place with its talons.
"Ah-ow…" He whined. "Rather than kicking me, it is more normal to yell something like 'duck!', don't you think?"
"Kicking you in the shin elicits a much faster response," Valla explained while shooting homing arrows at the swarms. Her moonlit eyes fully glowed, however, when she noticed a string of young Dessert Stings gliding their way. "Duck!" She yelled before vaulting away.
Lyndon turned his face three-quarters of the way, only to have it splattered with the row of demonic bugs. He grunted in surprise as they burst into green goo and fumes.
"Lyndon!" The huntress dashed over to place some traps on the floor to hold the swarms in place. She bought herself enough time to stand over the kneeling scoundrel and fire away at the demons. "Are you alright?" She asked him with concern.
"Ugh," Lyndon groaned in disgust as he wiped the goo from his face. "I think I'm alright. Surprisingly no pains; just kind of woozy."
"Good. If you were poisoned, you should be feeling pulsing burns within you," Valla breathed a sigh of relief.
"I'm fine." Lyndon blinked a couple of times before he stood up and armed his crossbow again.
"Pulsing burns…like the fires of hatred…the burning passion of a tango," The huntress hissed as she aimed her weapons forward.
The resistance of the demon hunter's traps waned. More swarms and spiders poured out of the corridors, advancing towards them. The pair found themselves once again glued against each other's backs.
"Have you ever learned how to tango, Lyndon?" Valla asked.
The scoundrel raised a brow. "…Yes? W-What's that got to do with anything all of a sudden?!"
"Dip me," she ordered calmly.
"…What?"
"Dip me!"
The huntress gracefully fell backwards with her arms stretched above her head. Lyndon slipped an arm out in a panic to support her as she went down firing a volley of bolts at the swarms behind them. When she came to a stop, Lyndon's jaw dropped; Valla raised a satisfied brow at him then kicked off into a back flip and landed her heels into a demonic spider. The scoundrel stared disbelievingly at her for a second before he wore a smug smile.
"Hmm…" he purred as he swiftly closed in on the huntress, wrapping an arm around her waist. "You know, love," He whispered huskily, "The rule in tango is that once you come into contact with your partner," He winked, "You do not ever let them go until the dance ends."
Valla's lips quirked into a tiny, amused smile. "Is that a vow of everlasting love?"
"In this passionate relationship of ours?" The scoundrel smirked. "Oh yes."
They locked their challenging gazes together almost at the same time as they raised their firearms. Each of their bolts pointed straight to the swarms to their sides. Once they turned their heads to face opposite directions, they began firing at the advancing demons, circling each other like a dance.
"You'll have to do better than that to convince me," Valla challenged.
Lyndon took that as a cue and threw an arc of blinding powder at the remaining demons. Valla took the opportunity to shoot another volley of bolts at them, ending with a grenade that burst the powder further to the swarms behind. She loaded and slung several exploding bolos around them. The last of the hellspawn ignited into fireworks, blasting a large spider corpse straight towards the pair.
The scoundrel quickly grabbed the huntress by the wrist and spun her around, successfully dodging the carcass. He slid his leg out, bending Valla into yet another dip.
"How was that?" He purred. "Convincing enough?"
Valla raised a gloved hand to cup his cheek. "Oh Lyndon…" She then showed a teasing smirk. "…I still do not believe you."
"Then let us seal my vow with a traditional kiss!" Lyndon puckered his lips and lowered himself towards the demon hunter.
Valla lightly slapped him across the face. "Lyndon," She said.
He brushed her hand away. "Don't be shy, dearest." He smacked his lips and puckered them again.
This time, Valla slapped him a little harder. "Scoundrel."
"Ow, what is it, love?" He started to feel a little annoyed but relentlessly aimed for her lips. "Call me by my name like usual," He muttered through his puckered lips.
Slap!
"Scoundrel."
"Mmmmuuu…I ever so adore you, dearest, mmmmmu!"
Slap!
"Pull yourself together!"
"MMMMMU!"
Slap!
"WAKE UP! YOU BLOODY CRIMINAL!"
The templar roared at the drowsy scoundrel who firmly latched his arms around him. Lyndon puckered his lips, reaching for Kormac's lips while Eirena and Haedrig attempted to pry him off. A little further away from the shouting, Valla and Covetous Shen stood in observation.
"What in the Burning Hells is wrong with him?" Valla asked stoically with her head cocked to the side.
"Seems like the poisonous fumes from those Desert Stings may have put him in a state of hallucination, heh heh," Covetous Shen explained with an amused grin, "He's as good as a thirsted man seeing a mirage after days of wandering the desert."
"I see…" The huntress commented with some fascination.
According to Valla's account, an hour ago, they were indeed ambushed by hoards of Dessert Stings and spiders in a cave. Lyndon had indeed been hit by the fumes from their demonic young; right after he mentioned 'feeling woozy', he had collapsed to the floor. Valla swept the cave clean on her own while he laid on the ground, mumbling deliriously. She returned to the Hidden Camp through a town portal after dragging Lyndon's limp body across the sands. After having the town healer examine him and letting him rest, the scoundrel sprung up half-awake. And there they were…
"Somebody knock 'im out before I do and kill 'im in the process!" Haedrig roared.
On cue, Eirena muttered a spell into her hand and slapped it across the back of Lyndon's head. The scoundrel fell over in an instant, allowing everyone to breathe a sigh of relief.
"Hah…thank you, Eirena," Kormac gave a bashful nod of gratitude.
The enchantress chuckled, "You are most welcome."
Everyone proceeded to stare at the twitching scoundrel on the floor.
"Oohhh…" Lyndon groaned.
Everything was spinning until he blinked a couple of times to steady his vision. He exhaled a long breath out of his nose as if his lungs were plump with too much oxygen. But at the end of that breath, he felt something wet and floppy splat onto his forehead, so he jolted with a squeak, firing his eyes awake. Was it another demon? Another hellish insect? A diabolically…?
"What's wrong?" Valla's hand was stopped in midair after she had dropped the damp cloth over the scoundrel's forehead. Her glowing eyes shook with caution.
Lyndon's agape mouth pulled into a relieved smile that let a sigh of admiration escape. "Ah…it is just a diabolically ravishing woman…"
Valla herself heaved a sigh. "Thank the heavens you are back to your normal ways." She refolded the damp cloth and placed it on Lyndon's forehead. "I was going to shoot you if I saw any further signs of you turning into a demon."
The scoundrel groaned. "Must you say such harsh things? I barely remembered what happened in the cave. I'm an ill patient!" He whined. "Oh…What happened?"
"Well," The huntress smirked a little. "The young of a Desert Sting attacked you; you collapsed from the poisonous fumes; I retrieved your sloth of a carcass; you woke up suddenly, crazed with hallucination, then tried to deflower the templar."
"I tried to…?" Lyndon grimaced while Valla turned her head to let out an amused chortle. "You're laughing!" He pointed at her disbelievingly, but his temples pounded enough that he threw the thought aside and covered his eyes with one palm.
The huntress only snorted louder until her chuckles were clearly audible. Lyndon could not help but join with his own chortles. It was probably the first time they had laughed like that together. For a moment there, Valla had dropped her inhibitions; laughter after all, coupled with time, was a good way to heal from the dark times she had endured. Though, she was dainty and held back her laughs with so much force that her moonlit eyes starting tearing.
"But I clearly remember…" Lyndon squished his eyes shut to joggle his memory. "We were passionately fighting off the hellspawn together. It was something like a tango of sorts…"
Valla completely stopped chuckling; her face dropped back to the stern look she had always had. "Well, your memory is faulty," She said.
"But everything was fuzzy after we cleared the cave," Lyndon insisted, massaging his temple in hopes of remembering. "It was too real to be a dream or hallucination." He then slapped his hand on the bed sheets and pointed a stern finger at Valla with the other. "Your memory is faulty!" He playfully accused her. "We were about to kiss too!" He paused for a second in realization. "We were about to kiss!" He sat up excitedly.
Valla nudged the palm of her hand onto Lyndon's forehead enough to make him fall back onto the bed.
"Oooh," The scoundrel purred with a smug. "You know," He said while making slow circles on the sheets with his finger. "We are alone in this room…"
"Don't sit up so suddenly." Valla scolded him softly. "You need your rest."
"I'm touched by your concern, but don't change the subject, love," Lyndon wagged his finger at her.
The huntress got to her feet rather quickly, darting past the door to shut it behind her. It left Lyndon in a bit of shock, but he hummed confidently to himself, convinced of his version of the story.
Valla backed against the door. She raised the tips of her fingers to touch her own lips, the shade of her cheeks complementing the colour of her hood.
"At last! Caldeum is free of demons!" Kormac cheered as he packed his belongings onto the caravan.
The group's work was done in the desert lands. They bid farewell to the Iron Wolves and townspeople before preparing the caravan to leave. Throughout that morning, however, Lyndon and Valla seemed oddly distant. But no one decided to intrude again. It was most likely the scoundrel's fault anyway, whatever it was – so thought the group.
"Our next destination is New Tristram, correct? I'm very excited to see it!" Eirena exclaimed.
"Ah, it might still be a wee bit gloomy, mind you," Haedrig explained. "The hellspawn numbers are probably still high back there."
"Nothing we can't handle, friend!" Kormac confidently said, giving a strong pat to the blacksmith's back. But he paused when the scoundrel passed him with an air of dejection. "What did you do now?" He sighed.
Lyndon twirled around with a scoff. "Me again?!" He exclaimed as if he were tried unjustly.
Kormac firmly crossed his arms over his chest. "Yes, you," He said. "It's always you and something you did."
The scoundrel scoffed again, "Well, I'll have you know that I'M the victim this time."
"Are you?" Eirena interjected with skepticism, though her voice was innocent as ever.
Lyndon put his hands on his hips. "I am almost certain that I was able to woo our heroine over there," He said, pointing to the demon hunter standing a few feet away. "While we were battling hellspawn in the caves yesterday, we had rather steamy, strategic positioning." He wriggled his brows suggestively.
"That's not her version of the story," Kormac said flatly.
"It was clear as Tyrael's wings in my memory," Lyndon stated confidently.
Kormac crossed his arms over his chest. "Well, your memory is faulty."
Lyndon whined, "Why does everyone say that?"
"Lyndon, come here, dearest," Valla called out suddenly.
The three followers eyed her disbelievingly, though Lyndon quickly smirked and puffed his chest out at the templar.
"Wooed," He sighed haughtily as he walked to the huntress.
"CAW!"
"WOOOO!" Lyndon squeaked in surprise - just when he was inches away from touching Valla's shoulder, the huntress' pet raven swooped between them before perching on her arm. "Stupid, bloody, stinking bird!" He yelled, pointing rudely at the raven. "Your mistress was calling to me, you know?!"
"Calling to you?" Valla raised a brow before she smirked. "Ah, I forgot to mention – my raven has a name now."
Lyndon's eyes darted back and forth between the bird and its master. He then proceeded to slouch over in dejection. "You actually named him after me?" He said disbelievingly.
"I can not?" She said in the flattest tone. "Hm, that's a shame. 'Lyndon' is a rather charming name in the end."
Lyndon beamed, suddenly jogging to the huntress' side while she walked to the caravan. "It is, isn't it?" He purred. "I welcome the chance to hear you say my name in bed."
"I meant it's a charming name for a pet," Valla retorted.
"Oooh," Lyndon purred again. "Is that what you call it?"
Valla kicked him hard in the shin, leaving him keeled over in pain as she hopped onto the caravan. Kormac and Eirena idly passed the scoundrel, ignoring his pitiful pleas for help.
"It's always you and something you did," Kormac said, snickering to himself.
When the group finished loading their belongings into the caravan, they hopped on to their journey back to New Tristram. Lyndon still massaged his lightly bruised shin along the way. Every now and then, he snuck glances at the hooded huntress sitting near the curtains. When the light peered in and shone on her face, her blushed red cheeks were clearly seen. The moment that Valla noticed the scoundrel looking at her, she pulled her hood even further to hide her face. For the first time in forever, Lyndon himself felt embarrassed.
Though, the man giggled to himself on the journey while the others gave him weird glances. He had indeed been properly smitten; and the one who smote him was probably almost just as smitten.
A/N: And it is done! I hope you enjoyed this two-shot. They were very fun to write! I usually write BL, but straight pairings like these are fun to write as well. Please do take a look at my other stories if they are to your fancy. Cheers!
