CHAPTER 2

I AM HIM AND HE IS ME?

Somewhere above her head, a pigeon cooed. There was a honk in the street from several blocks away. If she focused, she could hear the continual drip - drip - drip - of a drainage pipe on the building to the far right.

She flicked her ear away from the irritating noise.

Slowly, the world caught up, her brain rousing as if from a fog-like dream. She was lying face down on something warm and comfortable. She inhaled deeply and smelled the sweet sugar of the macarons she'd helped her father bake that afternoon.

It was such a lovely smell, always leaving the house fragrant and homey.

Her stomach growled - she was hungry.

Marinette frowned.

That wasn't right. She'd just had dinner before patrol, so why would she be hungry?

It didn't make sense.

Shifting, she groaned as her head swam.

Where was she?

Creaking her eyes open, there was a brush of raven hair, a smooth pale neck, and a familiar round face.

Eyes wide, mouth open, shock freezing her limbs, her eyes flicked over the sleeping girl.

Marinette.

Herself.

Her body.

A small noise left her throat and it sounded - wrong. Too deep. Too gravely. Blond strands flicked into her eyes and she laid there - unable to move. Her hands shook, her breath was coming in short pants, her heart thundered so loudly it was all she could hear anymore.

She wondered if this was what a panic attack felt like.

Finally, mouth still dropped in horror, she lifted herself off of - herself? and stared hard at her own face. Gaze dancing to her ears, she spied the dark budded earrings in her lobes.

Her Miraculous was still there.

Lifting a clawed hand, she saw a black ring on her finger - it was back to normal, the wafting violet cloud had vanished.

And then: realization hit like a ton of bricks.

"Oh-Oh, my God, I'm Chat Noir…" she squeaked, his voice leaving her throat. Springing off her body, she stood on shaky legs and held her clawed fingers to her face - his face.

Her tail - his tail - someone's tail flicked back and forth in agitation behind her.

"Oh, no… Oh, no. Oh, no. This is bad. This is really bad. What do I do?" The words left in a strangled mess. Lowering her arms, she took a deep breath, trying to keep rational.

"Alright, Marinette, this is a dream or something. I hit my head too hard and now I'm having a nightmare that I've turned into Chat Noir…"

Pinching her cheek, she winced.

Okay, so pain meant not dreaming, right? There had to be some explanation. Some reason. The akuma. Something about the akuma's spell had switched her into Chat Noir and now she was a boy.

A thin - very fit - boy.

She brushed a blond lock out of her eye and paced the balcony, occasionally glancing at the still body lying on the ground. Marinette stopped short as a drop of panic suddenly rushed through her - what if it wasn't Chat Noir in her body, but someone else?

Slowly, shoulders hunched forward and looking more like a prowling cat than she cared to admit, Marinette approached her sleeping self and watched the chest rise and fall steadily.

Whoever was in there was still passed out.

Good. Probably for the best.

Tikki. She needed Tikki.

Scampering to the trap door, she opened the hatch and stuck her head inside her room. No red kwami in sight. Dropping on her bed, Chat Noir's boots leaving dirty scruffs on her sheets, Marinette's enhanced eyes searched desperately.

"Tikki! Where are you? It's me!"

"...Chat Noir…?" The tiny voice called out from her desk. The crimson kwami slipped from behind the picture frame of Adrien and slowly drifted towards her, cautiously.

"No! I'm Marinette!" Chat Noir's voice cracked, not used to the panic in the vocal cords. Holding out her clawed fingers, Tikki perched in them with blue eyes impossibly wide.

"Marinette? You're Chat Noir? How?"

"I don't know! I don't know why but I'm him, Tikki! I'm in his body! I'm freaking out! What do I do? I can't be Chat Noir! I-"

The kwami slipped up to close her lips tightly.

"Marinette, take a deep breath. You need to calm down."

She inhaled through her nose slowly. The kwami backed away, motioning her to keep going.

She breathed in - and breathed out - and breathed in - and was pleasantly surprised to find her room smelled like vanilla. She'd never noticed it before, but now, armed with Chat's sense of smell, she could pick apart the small little details in it. Richness, floral, almost a spicy wooded-

"Marinette?"

Blinking, she snapped back to the kwami sheepishly.

"Sorry, his enhanced senses are very distracting."

"Now is not the time to get distracted. Where is your body?"

She pointed up with a claw. "Still up there."

"What happened?"

Marinette thought back - searching her last memories. "Chat Noir landed on the balcony - he broke my teapot." She scowled, but her expression immediately softened. "He looked ill. There was a purplish cloud coming from his ring. It looked like the same power coming from the akuma tonight."

"The akuma that shot him with the spell?"

"Yeah," she bit Chat's lip in contemplation, "do you think this has something to do with the akuma's power? It could switch the location of objects it shot."

"If that's the case, Miraculous Ladybug should have cured it."

"I know. But it didn't. And the purple smoky spell covered him and caught me, too. Knocked us both out. I woke up and-" she gestured to the leather-cladded body, "-here I am."

A hard silence fell between cat and kwami. Her tail swishing behind her, she knocked a pink pillow to the floor as her panic started to climb again.

"Tikki, do you think Chat Noir's in my body? What if it's someone else? What if I got switched with Hawk Moth or Master Fu - a huge body snatching circle-"

"Unlikely," Tikki said confidently. "It's probably Chat Noir since the spell covered both of you. However, there's only one way to find out."

Shoulders dropping, she swallowed in Chat's tightening throat and released a long breath

"You're right. I guess I should wake myself up…"

Jumping with an agility she wasn't used to, Marinette landed on the balcony on all fours. Glancing over, sure enough, her body was still there - sleeping peacefully.

If Chat Noir is in there, it won't be peaceful for long, she thought with a wince.

"Tikki," she started as she crawled to her body's side, "what should I do if I stay like this? I have to power down eventually. Then I'll know Chat Noir's identity. Or," her face turned panicked, "what if an akuma attacks? Oh, Tikki, there won't be a Ladybug to stop it!"

The kwami looked pained, her eyes flicking from Marinette's desperate green eyes to the sleeping form on the ground.

"I think you have to reveal who you are."

Marinette clapped Chat's hands to his face - horrified.

"But-But you said-"

"I know what I said, Marinette, but these are circumstances out of our control. We have to have a Ladybug to purify the akuma. It's more important than keeping your identity a secret."

"Tikki… but-but…"

"I'm sorry that you have to find out each other's identity this way. This has never happened before."

The horror swirled higher. "So, it might be permanent?"

The kwami looked thoughtful for a moment. "No, I don't think it's permanent. Plagg might have more insight on what is happening. The spell effected his Miraculous after all."

Marinette's hands dropped, confused. "Plagg?"

"Chat Noir's kwami," she said briskly, turning her blue eyes on the sleeping girl. "I'll go hide until you're ready to tell him who you are. I'm sure there's going to be a lot of panic. It's probably better if we do this in small steps."

Marinette closed her eyes to steady herself. "Small steps..."

Watching the red zip back into the room, she took a long breath - her sensitive nose catching her body's faint sugar macaron smell. It was bizarre, and not a little bit unnerving, to see herself asleep on the ground. It wasn't like looking in a mirror, but more like seeing herself in a video. Turning her head to the left, she leaned in studiously. She had a longer nose than she realized.

Also, her hair might benefit from a new style.

Reaching out with a clawed finger, apprehension building in her chest, she nudged her cheek.

Eyes scrunching, a curve dipping on her lips, her body groaned before settling back down.

"Um- hey…" Marinette prodded the cheek again. "Hey, whoever you are, wake up, please…"

"Five more minutes, Plagg," her voice grumbled. A frown appeared between her eyebrows. Bluebell eyes creaking open, she stared ahead with confusion until she glanced to the left-

"Jesus!" She shrieked, leaping up and scuttling to the wall. Back pressed against the brick, eyes blown wide, mouth gasping, the blue gaze flicked frantically from the tangled lights, to the upturned table, and back to Marinette, who was giving herself a sheepish smile.

At least she hoped it was.

Hesitantly, she waved Chat's fingers in the air.

"Hi."

He was looking at himself.

He was sitting there.

But he was over here against the wall.

He was over there, but he was over here.

Glancing down, he saw pink pants, a light cream shirt, and a dark gray jacket. Raven fringe brushed into his eyes as he glanced down at small, shaking hands. He studied the palms - his mind unable to comprehend.

"So, here's the thing," his voice said to him and he snapped his neck up to stare at himself. Chat Noir was sitting cross-legged, mouth set in a firm line. "It looks like we have a bit of a situation."

"Sit-situation?!" he choked out, Marinette's sweet voice coming from his throat. "Why am I there, but here?"

"A-ah, well, see - that's the situation," his body said, the words stumbling a bit. "I'm Marinette?"

Thoughts washed away. He sagged against the wall.

Hard disbelief gripped him.

His hands covered his face.

"This can't be happening. This can't be happening. This can't be-"

"It is," his body called softly, shy green eyes tossing down to stare at the balcony floor. "I'm Marinette and I'm in your body."

He stared at himself - his mind frozen. The tail tossed worriedly, the black ears turned to catch something to the left, and he watched as she shook her head rapidly in a very animalistic fashion.

Finally, with Marinette's sweet voice, he whispered, "How?"

"I can only guess it was the purple smoke that was coming from your Miraculous," he - she explained, holding up a hand to showcase the black ring. It was back to normal - the green paw vibrant as ever.

"You passed out and it got me as well."

A drop of horror and humiliation tossed inside him. He felt his cheeks beginning to burn with a terrible blush.

"Marinette," he breathed, heart clenching tightly, "this is all my fault. If I had just told Ladybug about the spell, this would never have happened. I should have let her know that her cure didn't work. I didn't know what to do. I'm… I'm so sorry."

She crossed the floor with a catlike leap and sat next to him.

"Chat Noir," she started, low and serious. "there's an even bigger issue."

"What's that?" Marinette's tone was squeaky as it left him.

"I… I'm not sure how long we will be like this. A day? A week? A month-"

"I have to show you who I am," he answered for her, a rock of dread thudding in his stomach. "I have to show you my real identity."

"Not right now," she said quickly, suddenly sitting straight with an air of confidence sparkling on her face - his face.

The expression was so perfectly Marinette, he almost smiled.

Almost.

"I might have a few ideas on how to fix this."

His eyes widened. "Ideas? Like what?"

She suddenly blushed - the paleness of his cheeks reddening underneath the black mask. Confidence shaking a bit, she said, "You fell on top of me when the spell spread. What if-" she stared him straight in the eye, but she was faltered, "-we laid down in that position. You… on top of me…"

Mouth dropping open, face flushing brightly, the stone in Chat's stomach suddenly sprouted into hundreds of nerves - wiggling inside like snakes.

"I-I - you and me - laying on each other like-" He pressed his small hands together flat.

Green gaze slipped away nervously, Marinette raised her finger to start playing with the golden bell at her throat. "I mean, it's just a theory since that was the position we were in when it happened and maybe it'll trigger the spell to switch us back. Anyway, it was a stupid thought-"

"Let's do it." He nodded, lifting a hand to rest it on her shoulder - his shoulder? God, this was confusing. "Let's put your theory to the test. If it doesn't work, we'll think of something else."

The thin smile that spread on her mouth made him feel calmer.

This was a bad idea.

This was a really bad idea.

Marinette, in Chat Noir's body, lying on the ground.

Chat Noir, in her body, lying on top of her.

Chat rested his head on her chest, small arms wrapping loosely around her thin waist. Legs lying against her leather-cladded thigh, Marinette pressed her lips together as time slowly ticked onward.

This was embarrassing.

And uncomfortable.

And humiliating.

The only benefit to the position was the sweet familiar smell of macarons, which had come rushing back to her sensitive nose as soon as her body got close to her. Inhaling deeply, she tapped her clawed fingers lightly on Chat's back.

The night sky brushed a warm wind and, somewhere above their heads, another pigeon cooed loudly.

"Nothing's happening," she said flatly - Chat's voice sounding bored as it left her throat.

"Maybe give it another few minutes?" he suggested.

"It's been ten. I don't think this is working."

"Let's make it fifteen."

"No, let's try something else."

"Please? My chest is really comfortable."

"Oh, my god! Chat Noir, get off of me!" She growled and he let out a tinkling laugh. Sitting up, he was still chuckling happily and she rolled her eyes.

"I'm glad at least one of us is enjoying this."

"Deflecting fear with humor - it's what I do, princess." His grin slipped. "Have any more ideas?"

She closed her eyes for bravery and lifted a clawed hand to fiddle with the bell again. "I have only one more - and it's even worse…"

Chat quirked an eyebrow. "Worse? What - like running into each other at full speed?"

"U-um…" the nervousness sounded weird coming from Chat's lips, "I remember there was this one akuma a while back. Dark Cupid… he put you under a spell. You were attacking Ladybug."

Chat Noir's mouth dropped as comprehension kicked in. All humor drained from his face.

"...Ladybug - uhh - she kissed you and..."

"Are-are you suggesting…?"

They were both blushing, both stammering, both avoiding each other's eyes. Curling Chat's long limbs, she wrapped her arms around the knees, making herself as small as possible.

"I can't think of anything else. Ladybug broke the spell on you with a kiss. Maybe it'll break if we..."

Thick hard silence shimmered in the humiliation as both human and hero glanced at each other and swiftly looked away.

"You're right, Marinette," Chat suddenly announced. "Ladybug broke the spell. It could do the same thing."

"Are you sure?" The costumed ears were flattening on her head with nerves. "This is going to be weird. We are essentially kissing ourselves."

"I think it's worth a shot." Chat Noir's lips curled into a roguish smirk that didn't belong on her face. "If it works, we won't be kissing ourselves anymore, purr-incess."

She rolled her eyes at him. "Alright, tomcat, calm down. This is just going to be a little peck, okay?"

Despite what she said, Marinette's heart was in her chest and her stomach was curled in knots. Unwrapped her arms from her knees, she leaned closer to him with her eyes shut tight.

There were a few palpable seconds before a soft pressure drifted on her lips - gentle and light. Thoughts rushed, her hands lifted anxiously, and she felt Chat Noir's mouth press a little deeper on hers. She waited, eyes opening slightly.

His were open, too - blue irises flicking worriedly at everything else but her.

Nothing.

She was the one who broke the kiss. Leaning back swiftly, she exhaled and put her face in her hands.

Her sharp hearing caught Chat Noir's quiet disappointed groan.

"It didn't work," he sighed.

"What are we going to do?" she asked, deep voice breaking with her desperation. Hiding in her gloved hands, she felt fingers touch her wrist and she gasped. He pulled her hand down and clasped his small fingers around hers.

They sat together - holding hands - the late night mourning their predicament with silence.

Glancing at him, he had the same expression on his face.

Defeat.

Thank you for all the love and support! This story is way too much fun! :)